I am hoping someone can commiserate, offer support, or set me straight. This is kind of a rant, so skip if desired.
My DH (SAHD) took P (26 mo) for his 2 year checkup today. We see a provider most people in the area consider pretty crunchy. P is still nursing, btw. The outcome is, as far as I can tell,
1. P is overweight. So much so that she wants to run blood tests. He is 40 lbs. He has always been big (9-7 at birth, 24 lbs at 6 mo). I don't see how he is fat. I don't even see how the charts show him to be fat-- he is at 100%, but so what? I am very very upset about this.
2. We need to feed P fewer starches. Meaning, no white bread, less fruit. This will cause him to eat more beans and vegetables. I agree with this (the white bread was an argument I lost with DH anyway) since I know we can do better by him for his diet.
3. There is NO REASON P should not sleep through the night. He still wakes about once a night around 3am, then is in our room from 5 or 6am. I don't think this is too bad. I don't usually nurse him at 3. I am a FT WOHM, so part of me wonders if he just wants the cuddles. I will admit the sleep thing, with two kids, is really hard for me. But I don't want to force him into anything. This is part of why he's still nursing in the first place-- I want to give him space to be himself, as he needs to.
Ped (CNP actually) says we should put him in his room, say goodnight, leave, when he cries etc put him back in room or check on him, repeat ad nauseum. I guess at the "end" of this "successful" whatever, he will go to sleep on his own with minimal crying. This is just wrong. I haven't worked my ass off trying to accomodate his sleep to the best of my ability so that I can let him cry now. I don't understand. Is my child so abnormal, really?
4. Timeouts work on 2 yo apparently, and we should use them.
I"m trying to stick to these points, because the whole thing makes me mad. It makes me mad that I said I didn't want him to get the varicella shot and DH said he would "discuss it" and decide-- so P got it. I thought I was a parent too, and sometimes I feel that being a FT WOHP means I get less say because I'm not there each day. No one has to address this, since it's not really the point, but right now I feel like I'm a bad mother with a badly behaved overweight spoiled child and it makes me cry. LIterally. LIke, I cried at work.
Thank you for listening.
My DH (SAHD) took P (26 mo) for his 2 year checkup today. We see a provider most people in the area consider pretty crunchy. P is still nursing, btw. The outcome is, as far as I can tell,
1. P is overweight. So much so that she wants to run blood tests. He is 40 lbs. He has always been big (9-7 at birth, 24 lbs at 6 mo). I don't see how he is fat. I don't even see how the charts show him to be fat-- he is at 100%, but so what? I am very very upset about this.
2. We need to feed P fewer starches. Meaning, no white bread, less fruit. This will cause him to eat more beans and vegetables. I agree with this (the white bread was an argument I lost with DH anyway) since I know we can do better by him for his diet.
3. There is NO REASON P should not sleep through the night. He still wakes about once a night around 3am, then is in our room from 5 or 6am. I don't think this is too bad. I don't usually nurse him at 3. I am a FT WOHM, so part of me wonders if he just wants the cuddles. I will admit the sleep thing, with two kids, is really hard for me. But I don't want to force him into anything. This is part of why he's still nursing in the first place-- I want to give him space to be himself, as he needs to.
Ped (CNP actually) says we should put him in his room, say goodnight, leave, when he cries etc put him back in room or check on him, repeat ad nauseum. I guess at the "end" of this "successful" whatever, he will go to sleep on his own with minimal crying. This is just wrong. I haven't worked my ass off trying to accomodate his sleep to the best of my ability so that I can let him cry now. I don't understand. Is my child so abnormal, really?
4. Timeouts work on 2 yo apparently, and we should use them.
I"m trying to stick to these points, because the whole thing makes me mad. It makes me mad that I said I didn't want him to get the varicella shot and DH said he would "discuss it" and decide-- so P got it. I thought I was a parent too, and sometimes I feel that being a FT WOHP means I get less say because I'm not there each day. No one has to address this, since it's not really the point, but right now I feel like I'm a bad mother with a badly behaved overweight spoiled child and it makes me cry. LIterally. LIke, I cried at work.
Thank you for listening.
mama.
but what she meant is, read a book, sing a song, say goodnight, tuck him in, turn out light, leave. And basically reinforce this by putting him in his room again if he comes out, etc. Because, as she said, he's not 4 mo old. He knows we're in the house and knows we will come back.
Who cares, I guarantee she did not take parenting classes, but medical classes that have NOTHING to do with sleeping habits and parenting advice.
Besides, nursing reduces his chances of being overweight anyways.
Follow Mothering