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Nursing mamas chat week of August 24th - Page 2

post #21 of 51
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by acp View Post
For the most part, nursing is still going OK for us, though last night she decided to bite - hard! - when I was nursing her in the middle of the night, which she's only done a handful of times in her life. It would hurt in any case, but *really* hurts now with my already-sore boobs.
We're also down to nursing generally 2-3 times a day (before bed, when she gets up in the morning, and usually once during the night) which is very manageable. However, I think I may be one of the only people on this thread who does hope that DD weans during this pregnancy. I love the idea of tandem nursing in theory, but it also just sounds a little overwhelming to me, especially with FT work and pumping. I'm not really sure the best way to encourage it, since I don't want it to be too close to the new baby's arrival (which might exacerbate feelings of jealousy), but also want to let her nurse for a while longer.
This was also a surprise pregnancy for us - I didn't expect to be dealing with these nursing/pregnancy issues quite so soon...
One way to gently and slowing start weaning is to offer food, water or snuggles first. I limited dd1 while pregnant with dd2. Many times dd1 would forget all about nursing when whatever need she had was fulfilled in some other way. Nighttime was the hardest but again we offered food, water or snuggles. You can tailor this to whatever speed works for you and your dc.
post #22 of 51
Quote:
Originally Posted by honeybunmom View Post
I am in near agony nursing. I want it to end soooo badly. But, since I worlk full time, I have serious guilt about taking away something that obviously fills an emotional need for my 2 3/4 year old. I've told her it hurts and that I'd rather not. She'll ask if she can "suckle for a little bit" and I always relent. But, if it's just too darn painful, I ask her to come off rather than start crying.

My chest is so tender that I can't have her play around me while we're seated as she might inadvertantly hit my chest and I'll start crying (it's happened twice already). And her other love is my armpit. She's constantly nuzzling in it. Which wouldn't be so bad if it weren't so close to my breasts and I'm constantly jumping as her skull gets closer to my breast. When that hits, I'm in agony all over again.

Ugh.
Hugs (careful to stay away from sore chest lol). I am in a similar situation in that nursing has become unbearable for me. The nursing pain and discomfort is what alerted me to the pregnancy, it starts very early for me apparently. DS is 26 months old and wants to nurse all the time. I am determined to wean him during the next couple months. I just can't continue like this. I was already having some discomfort and negative feeling about night-nursing, but the pregnancy just made it all come to a head. Poor DS is not taking it well at all. I am trying to cut it down to just a couple times a day and to bed at night, but the more I try to limit it the more he demands it. He has taken to waking in the middle of the night and staying up for a couple hours. I am desperate for sleep and can't take it so I end up lying there nursing him, in agony, wanting to punch a hole in the wall just exhausted and used.

I need the release of sharing these trials with someone who understand, so thank you for starting this thread!
post #23 of 51
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by heatherweh View Post
Hugs (careful to stay away from sore chest lol). I am in a similar situation in that nursing has become unbearable for me. The nursing pain and discomfort is what alerted me to the pregnancy, it starts very early for me apparently. DS is 26 months old and wants to nurse all the time. I am determined to wean him during the next couple months. I just can't continue like this. I was already having some discomfort and negative feeling about night-nursing, but the pregnancy just made it all come to a head. Poor DS is not taking it well at all. I am trying to cut it down to just a couple times a day and to bed at night, but the more I try to limit it the more he demands it. He has taken to waking in the middle of the night and staying up for a couple hours. I am desperate for sleep and can't take it so I end up lying there nursing him, in agony, wanting to punch a hole in the wall just exhausted and used.

I need the release of sharing these trials with someone who understand, so thank you for starting this thread!

I can remember feeling similiar to you when shortly after dd1 turned two and I was 3 months or so pregnant with dd2. DD1 woke up at night for almost 2 months while I was trying to nightwean. After 3-4 days she accepted that she wasn't going to get milk but it took her awhile to adjust. I would have a snack ready for her. I would lay there while she ate some crackers and think about how angry I was that she wouldn't hurry up and finish them so we could go back to sleep. It's tough to have strong negative feelings about someone one loves so much. During the day I like to read while dd2 is nursing it helps me stay calm.
post #24 of 51
8 weeks here, nursing a 5 month old.

A little bit of pain, but not too bad. Feeling drained, but I've cut down on things and am doing simple meals, avoiding the big projects, etc, for now.

Going to go eat my oatmeal.
post #25 of 51
Interesting.... I just noticed that most nursing mamas here are nursing girls. I assume it's just a coincidence, but I wonder if it might possibly mean something else, such as that maybe girls tend to nurse longer?
post #26 of 51
Quote:
Originally Posted by VeganC View Post
Me too! Well, except for the laughing. Most days I'm bawling, and wailing, "I don't want to lose my milk!!!! My poor baby!!"
Can you tell breastfeeding is super major important to me?
It's good to know I'm not the only one! I posted this in the Child Led Weaning forum, but didn't get any replies, which was a bummer. It's hard to think of my toddler not being THE baby anymore. Now she's ONE of the babies...bizarre. It must be extra hard for you since your lo is younger. Who knows--maybe we will be the lucky ones who have milk the whole time with no pain.

Quote:
Originally Posted by 3sweetsurprises View Post
This is our third surprise baby. I was excited fo the first two but am really nervous and unsure of this one. My dh only wanted two, and we were waiting until the girls were older and then were going to do something permanent. I have no idea how I'm going to tell him. I wish that dd2 were just a few months older since I lose my milk almost immediately.

My patience for her switching sides is already low. She wants to switch 10+ times in one nursing session. I'm hoping this will slow down when she comes to realize that mommy just doesn't have much milk. I really hope she doesn't wean. I truly believe that two years (even if they aren't consecutive) is so important.
This sounds hard--good luck with telling your dh, I hope he gets excited about it. Sounds stressful! I hear ya on the switching sides thing though. My dd LOVES to do that, and it drives me a bit bonkers. How old is your dd2? I just got "Adventures in Tandem Nursing" in the mail over the weekend, so I'm hoping that will help me...
post #27 of 51
Thread Starter 
DD2 is 18 months old and dd1 just turned 4! I'm going to check out Adventures in Tandem Nursing next time I'm at the library. I didn't read it last time and wish I had.
post #28 of 51
Quote:
Originally Posted by heatherweh View Post
Hugs (careful to stay away from sore chest lol). I am in a similar situation in that nursing has become unbearable for me. The nursing pain and discomfort is what alerted me to the pregnancy, it starts very early for me apparently. DS is 26 months old and wants to nurse all the time. I am determined to wean him during the next couple months. I just can't continue like this. I was already having some discomfort and negative feeling about night-nursing, but the pregnancy just made it all come to a head. Poor DS is not taking it well at all. I am trying to cut it down to just a couple times a day and to bed at night, but the more I try to limit it the more he demands it. He has taken to waking in the middle of the night and staying up for a couple hours. I am desperate for sleep and can't take it so I end up lying there nursing him, in agony, wanting to punch a hole in the wall just exhausted and used.

I need the release of sharing these trials with someone who understand, so thank you for starting this thread!
My daughter is the same way. Prior to my vocalizing that we needed to cut back on nursing, she only nursed morning and evening anyway. And not both every day. It was often that she would forgo morning or evening and some days even both. When I started to talk about eliminating nursing, she began to ask con.stant.ly. So, I've gone back to not mentioning eliminating it. I did try something that my girlfriend recommended - just allow her to put her mouth on my breast and ask her not to suckle. Her first response, "It's not coming out!" Ok, yeah, she was hip to my game real quick. Interestingly, though, she'll just rest her mouth there sometimes and then ask if she can suckle and then stop. Some days she'll offer me juice or whatever is nearby after she nurses to "help [my] yum-yums feel better." She's so sweet! Nursing rarely lasts more than 2 minutes now.
post #29 of 51
DD is 2.5 and only nurses at naptime. I really want her to wean completely during this pregnancy. I've been fighting contact dermatitis on my nipples for about a year and a half now and want it to completely heal before this baby gets here.

Good luck to all of you trying to keep your babes at the breast!
post #30 of 51
I think my milk might be drying up. My dd is at the breast all the time now, but I barely feel any let down. : On the bright side, my nipples have stopped hurting.
post #31 of 51
Wow...all of these nursing mamas are just fabulous!!! :

I'm currently tandem nursing two girls also (girls...hmmm....?). Natalie is 4.5 and Madeleine just turned two.

I can't nurse them at the same time anymore...it is too creepy, crawly so Natalie has to wait for her turn (and she's usually pretty patient).

Natalie and Madeleine both sleep with me, one on either side, but I've been really putting off Natalie whenever I can, especially before bed (I kind of drag my feet and nurse her sister to sleep first) so Natalie usually just snuggles up behind me and falls asleep, too tired to stay awake and wait to be nursed and so she's not even waking up to nurse at night anymore! :

Madeleine does, but I'm OK to only night-nurse one child right now.

I have been doing lots of delaying Natalie's nursing requests and trying to substitute those with other things, like cow milk, tickles, hugs and kisses, yogurt and when I'm desperate, a Hershey's kiss. If she's really insistent then I'll let her nurse, but usually just for a minute or two. I'm hoping she'll wean during this pregnancy, but I'm hoping that Madeleine will not.

One day at a time, I guess...
post #32 of 51
It's so nice to hear from other preggo nursing mama's who are in a similar boat. DD is 22mos and this pregnancy happened a bit early for us. Seriously I just got my first post-partum period in July.... and bam! Here comes baby
We are pleasently surprised
I currently night-weaned DD and it went well, no meltdowns or anything. I told her the Num Nums are sleeping and she can have them in the morning, she takes a swig of water from her sippy cup and rolls on over to go back to sleep. She is nursing about 3-4x during the day and the inital latch makes me draw my breath in, but then it's fine. So that's my scoop. I looking forward to growing my babe in the company of some other nursing mama's!:
post #33 of 51
Are all of you ladies telling your midwife/ob that you are nursing? Did any of them say anything? I know I'm going to tell, and I'm a bit nervous about their reaction.
post #34 of 51
I told at my nurse intake appointment this week. She had no reaction. Just like, okay, that's nice. It came up because there was a series of questions about how you plan to feed the new baby, if you needed to take a BF class, if you had experience with BF, how long have you BF, etc.

Me: I've been BF for 2 years, and counting!
Intake nurse: Oh, you're still nursing?
Me: Yup!
Intake nurse: Okay... next question.

I guess we'll see next week if the doc has an issue with it. If he does, I'll be armed with my own info though!
post #35 of 51
Quote:
Originally Posted by Julia'sMom View Post
Are all of you ladies telling your midwife/ob that you are nursing? Did any of them say anything? I know I'm going to tell, and I'm a bit nervous about their reaction.
I've found that most OBs in my area are pretty uninformed about breastfeeding during pregnancy. My OB told me that I'd better have my child weaned before week 20 or it could put me into premature labor. And I don't even have any risk factors for premature labor! :

Recommendations about breastfeeding during pregnancy should follow the same recommendations for sexual intercourse/orgasm...ie, if you can have sex during pregnancy then you can breastfeed during pregnancy. (The uterus contracts less during let-down/breastfeeding than during female orgasm.) But not a lot of OBs know this, or care to inform themselves!

I haven't spoken to a MW yet, but I'm sure she's a lot more informed about topics such as this, and will, I'm sure, be very supportive.

I guess it comes down to...do you feel like defending yourself and your choices to your OB? Are you calm under pressure or would the scrutinizing by your OB make you too stressed out? Maybe go into your appointment armed with the newest research so you could possibly leave the appointment having educated your OB about something. Who knows...I could happen....
post #36 of 51
My midwife said that as long as everything stays normal with the pregnancy that nursing is fine. Of course, we'll have to keep track of how both babies are growing, since my ds is almost five months.

I've started telling people that I'm eating for three. And, new this pregnancy, I realized that I need to SLEEP for two!
post #37 of 51
I never should've posted about how well nightweaning was going! I think I jinxed myself. The last two nights have been horrid with lots of wakings and some crying. I'm a zombie. I really should be sleeping now since both kids are.

My MW is totally pro-nursing and doesn't bat an eye about nursing during pregnancy. But she's a crunchy homebirth midwife. I'll get some care at Kaiser so that I can get my lab work done there and have myself in the system in case we need to transfer during the birth. Who knows what the random obs there will say about nursing? The OBGYN I really like comes back from vacation in November and she's pro-homebirth, so with her I can relax.
post #38 of 51
Quote:
Originally Posted by lilgreen View Post
Interesting.... I just noticed that most nursing mamas here are nursing girls. I assume it's just a coincidence, but I wonder if it might possibly mean something else, such as that maybe girls tend to nurse longer?
well, my son nursed until he was around 5y4mo old. and even that wasn't *completely* child-led. i'd nudged and suggested a few times before but he never seemed ready. once he was, it just took one conversation and he was ok with it. anyway, he nursed throughout my pregnancy with ava, even though i dried up at around 4mo. he didn't care that there was nothing coming out, he just wanted the comfort. he was 2yo exactly when we found out i was pregnant, so a bit younger than ava was/is.

ava is actually nursing a bit less than rowan did at this time.
post #39 of 51
the only concern i ever got from a mw during my pg with ava (re: continuing to nurse rowan) was that i was getting enough down time for me, enough rest, enough hydration, etc. more like "you really have to make sure you take care of yourself since you're breastfeeding as well as creating life in there" sort of a thing. it was all supportive, etc...but with advice.
post #40 of 51
Dd is cutting way back, though I don't really expect her to wean. She'll be 4 in December. We haven't told her about the pregnancy yet, but I have told her that "ana" hurts right now and to be gentle. She's really good about remembering.

We'll see if it comes up in the OB appt. next week.
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