My 3.5 year old is starting Montessori next week and I'm freaking out...

[yentroc]

I've been really excited for her up until this week and now I'm getting nervous! I'm just wondering if she's too young for 5 days a week. We have such a laid back morning schedule right now. She's an only child and lives in an imaginary world half the time and in the mornings we have breakfast and then she plays by herself for awhile and then we play together, and then have another later breakfast. Most days we don't get going until 10:30 or so if we're going to leave the house...

She's going to be in the morning class which starts at 9am and ends at 11:30. All of a sudden I'm worrying if I'm pushing her too much to be in school at 3! Is it too much of a schedule for a 3 year old?

On the flip side, she needs a lot of stimulation and is so ready to learn new things... I know she'll love it.

How did your 3 year olds adjust to 5 days a week?

Thanks!

[erinmacey]

Just here to offer some empathy, Mama. My 2.5 year old just started Montessori three mornings a week and I am asking myself the same questions. At times, he seems really excited about school, but two of the mornings he has cried when I left (I confess that I cried, too, once I reached the car!). I am trained as a Montessori teacher and really believe in the philosophy - I know what he'll get there just can't be matched at home. Because he's a shy kid, I'm excited for him to learn how to interact with other kids in a structured setting. And I know he'll be doing all kinds of things that will complement what we do at home. Still, part of me feels like maybe this is too early? And I was surprised at how much I missed him - I totally didn't expect that!

I actually think 5 days a week might be a good thing (over three) - less time to forget what school is like/fall out of the routine. I remember teachers at our Montessori preschool (I taught in the middle school) saying that long periods away (even weekends, sometimes) made the transition back to school hard.

[lactivist]

I started my almost 3yo in Montessori last Feb. and I was really worried about the five days a week. He thrived! We just went to the open house last night (it starts again in a week) and he dove right in, was so happy to see all his friends and didn't want to leave. He is so excited to start next week. They had told me that 5 days a week worked best and I didn't believe it but it was true for us. We had 2 long days and 3 short days and that was making him crazy. The routine and consistency of knowing what is going on really works for him. We are now going to do 5 long days and I think it will work really well for him.

Just for the record we were the same way not getting out of the house or really going until later but he hasn't had a problem with getting up and going early. It did take him about 2 weeks to really get adjusted and stop fighting us in the morning. I expect that we will have another transition period when he starts again.

Hugs! I hope it all turns out great and she loves it as much as my ds does.

Wendi

[yentroc]

Thanks so much mamas!! I really appreciate the responses. It is the transition that I'm worried about.

Wendi, that's interesting about the short and long days, I'm actually a little worried about that too. I work 3 days a week and dd will have one long day, one day that she stays for lunch and then 3 short days. Dd is VERY routine oriented and gets anxious about what's going to happen which day... I hope that the consistancy of being there 5 days/week will help with the inconsistancy of the length of her days there. Up until now, I've had a sitter come to our house 3 days a week on my work days and that's been really difficult for her trying to figure out which day is which.

Thanks again... I've been so stressed about this the past few days!

[DeepLakeSwimmer]

Hi Cortney!

My 3.5 year old, Gillian, is starting 5 days a week Montessori school next week as well and I am sharing all the same fears/feelings with you! Logically, for me, I KNOW she'll be fine, I mean, she's actually been in day care for longer days than she'll be at her new school; but I'm really kind of freaking out about her being "a big kid" you know--packing a lunch, using the bathroom by herself, etc. etc. I'm definitely dealing with some transitions myself right about now!

Mindy

[Lillianna]

We do the same thing at home - get up leisurely and eat a few times throughout the morning - my dd plays for hours!
That is precisely why a Mont. program is so perfect, because there are no predetermined schedules to adhere to. The 3 hour work period is just like the natural flow of home-life. Children eat when they are hungry, play uninterrupted with activities that they choose and the Directress respects the individual routines and interests. Of course, everything goes more smoothly when my dd gets a good night sleep.
Still, I know it's hard to say goodbye to our sweet little ones, I miss my dd too when she is in class.
Good luck!

[Koloe]

My DD starts 5-days a week next week as well. She just turned 3 last Saturday. We went to parent orientation last night and I took her up to the room they were had free child care for the orientation. She looked around and headed straight for the shopping cart and didn't look back. When I came back upstairs we went through the classrooms and she was mesmerized by the little brooms and dishes. She started checking everything out. I was afraid I was going to be dragging a screaming child out of there, but eventually I was able to persuade her it was time to go. She REALLY wants to go back.

My problem is she needs to start pooping on the potty or she won't be going there for long. I've been telling her all summer she needs to start doing that if she wants to go to school. I so hope last night and tomorrows student orientation is enough motivation to get her to that final step. Because I think she will really like going there and will benefit greatly from it.

[yentroc]

Thanks mamas (Hi Mindy!!!!)

Yeah the bathroom thing is definately a concern for me. I still wipe dd (especially poop!!) and she still has pee accidents frequently if I don't remind her to go potty...

That's a good perspective, Lilliana, about the flow of the work time, that does make me feel better, it is exactly how our mornings are. Dd is very self directed in her play.

We should all stay in touch on this thread (or start another one) next week to report how all our little ones are doing!!

[DeepLakeSwimmer]

Originally Posted by cortneydc

We should all stay in touch on this thread (or start another one) next week to report how all our little ones are doing!!

That's a great idea! I'll be excited to hear how some other little ones around the same age make the transition--because I KNOW I'm going to have some concerns!

Yes--the potty thing. Gillian rarely has accidents anymore but she also RARELY can wipe herself. In trying to get her ready for school I'm afraid I've given her some fear/anxiety about it as well. I'm just hoping that teachers aids are available for that kind of help.

Good luck mamas!
Mindy

[KBecks]

We're in the same boat but I'm very excited. My son is a little closer to 4, his b-day is in October. Orientation for him to see his class and cubby, etc. is Friday, and our day is 8 to 11:30 and he'll get there at around 7:15 - 7:30 for early drop off.

We can stay in touch next week and see how it goes!

[shayinme]

I am glad to see this thread, my dd is 3 and is currently in traditional daycare that she attends 3 days a week. However the montessori preschool in our area had a surprise opening so we have an interview tomorrow, but my concern has been the 5 days a week versus 3 days we currently have.

I feel the montessori program is superior to where dd is now but the switch is really concerning me even though she will actually be there less hours since its 5 mornings versus the 3 full days where she is now.

Anyway I will check back in here since this looks like others who are in a similiar position to me.

Shay

[daytripper75]

Mine started today and I was feeling the same way. So excited until it hit me that she was going to be out of the house and away from me each and every day.
Today was a great day and she loves it! I can't wait until I am allowed in the school to get more of a feel for what is going on there! The first observation day is in less than 2 weeks.

[spedteacher30]

my boy started on Monday. he is 2.5, and is the youngest in his class.

he has been in daycare for two years, but i still got all worked up with the transition.

he loves it, so my worries have proven to be overblown.

the potty was a huge issue for me (and still is) though they aren't too worried about the fact that he has peed in his pants (twice Monday, not at all Tuesday, and once today). I'm hoping he never poops at school.

A friend of mine is a preschool teacher, and she claims that the kiddoes usually don't poop at school for a couple of months because they aren't comfortable enough.

[BCFD]

It'll be ok, Mama! My DD's school only had a 1 half day opening when we started and we snagged it right up to get our foot in the door. She did that for 2 months. This school rarely has openings, so I was thrilled! Of course, the selfish mommy in me was glad to only have to be away from her for 3 hours a week.

What started to happen is that she would get so worked up and nervous and scared about Friday that it was killing me inside. I left her every school day with tears in my eyes and the other 6 days were so stressful because I'd have to endure the "I don't want to go to school, Mommy" and "Will you stay with me?" comments. It was awful. Then we finally got a 2 half day slot (for a month) and then finally 5 half days. Now that she goes every single day and knows what to expect, it's wonderful!!!! She looks forward to school and loves it there. She did just change classes with the beginning of this school year, but only 2 of her old classmates moved with her (it was our choice to put her in a larger class) and she had a couple of rough mornings of being shy and clingy, but she's fine now. In fact, today when I went to pick her up she was in the waiting area with another little boy that goes half days and they were playing so nice together (drawing and building castles with Tinker Toys). I was just thinking today how much she has blossomed from when she started. She started at 3y3m old and will be 4 in Nov.

Oh, and she has only pooped once at school since starting in Feb. 2008. She definitely has put herself on a late afternoon poop schedule so she can avoid going at school. Can't say I blame her since I have a public poop phobia, too.

[northerngirl]

Yes! I am so glad I am not the only one. My dd will be 2.5 on Sept 8th and is the youngest in her class. She will be going 5 days a week and staying for daycare until 4:30. This will be a big adjustment for her bc she has never been in daycare and only this summer had a nanny for 3 days a week 8 hours a day.
This morning was her first day of orientation from 10:30-12:00. She was excited to go, but my stomach was in such a knot. I was especially worried bc she is not totally potty trained and has only left the house a few times with training pants on. I thought for sure she would have an accident today so I sent 2 changes of clothes along. She has only gone on a potty chair and they have regular toilets, although mini ones. And, she has only pooped on the potty one time, so that should be interesting...
But, to my surprise she did not have an accident and pottied fine on the mini toilets. Ahhh sigh of relief! Double sigh bc she pooped tonight so I don't have to worry about that for tomorrow.
This is so great to know that others are in the same boat.

[MommaSuzi]

I'm in this boat too! My dd will be 2.5 on September 3 and this week is her first week at Montessori. She had been in daycare before, so at least this isn't her first time away, but it's still an adjustment. There were no tears the first day, but a few yesterday and today. But fortunately when we pick her up she seems quite happy and the teachers are telling us she is doing well. I can tell she is because in the past when there has been chaos in her daycare room because of new teachers/toddlers we could tell by her behavior in the evening. This morning though she was insistent she was NOT going to go to school. I asked her why and she cocked her head and said "Mommy, I want to go to Montessori!" I take that as a good sign!

[cycle]

Another momma here with a ds new to Montessori. My ds is 3.5 and although he has been in half to full time care since he was 18 months old I have been so stressed about his transition to Montessori. This week was orientation week so parents were there every morning for 1.5 hours while the children were together with the three primary teachers. This was a time that the teachers could observe the children to determine which class they would each be placed in. Since I work ds has been in extended care this week with the exception of Monday and is doing really well. The staff at the school says he has been doing exceptionally well, he has even napped:.

It is a huge change though from the preschool he was in which is why I was so worried. I love that they expect the children to do a lot for themselves but I have been worried that if ds was stuck and couldn't do something (like button his pants) he would be lost. I have made sure to send him in pants that don't have buttons or zippers this week because he doesn't have the button thing mastered yet.

We found out the teacher he will have today and I am a little bit disappointed for ds. I had no preference, all the teachers seem really wonderful but this week ds became enamoured with the "teacher with hair like his" and has talked about her all week. I could have intervened and requested her for him but I felt it was best to let the school make the decision. He did not get "the teacher with hair like his", I know he will be fine but there was a small part of me that was hoping for him. Next week will begin the actually classroom so I'll let you all know how it goes. I hope everyone posts here to give updates on their little ones as well!

[Koloe]

Originally Posted by spedteacher30

A friend of mine is a preschool teacher, and she claims that the kiddoes usually don't poop at school for a couple of months because they aren't comfortable enough.

My kiddo didn't get this memo. She pooped in her pants during the 30 min I was downstairs at Parent Orientation Tuesday night. But she stayed clean for her 1 hour student orientation this morning.

4 of the 5 kids at DD's orientation went in with no problems and their parents left them after a few minutes to go to the lunch room to watch a couple videos on Montessori. 45 mins into the 1 hour session the last child's father came in. A few minutes later his DS ran out looking for him and my DD went after him to see why he was crying. Then she spied me, came and asked why the other child was sad and then wanted to stay with me and nurse since she missed her morning nursing session. I eventually got her back in her class and she was not overly interested in leaving when the hour was up.

I was able to remove her from the premises as a happy, cooperative child instead a screaming child who didn't want to leave like I almost had to do Tuesday night as they were locking up. And Wednesday she was quite upset that she wasn't going to school because she had had so much fun the night before.

[DeepLakeSwimmer]

Hi Everyone,
Quick update--Gillian had her two hour orientation yesterday and LOVED it--so much that she cried when it was time to leave. As much as I hate the tears I'm going to take that as a good sign. I also got some clarification on the potty issue and feel much relieved that my little one isn't just going to be all alone on that one. In fact, the teacher assured us that during the first week they expect all kinds of accidents and to just make sure the kids come with a few extra changes of clothes. I'm so excited for her to start "for real" on Tuesday--I just wish I could be a fly on the wall to watch it all.
Mindy

[yentroc]

That's EXCELLENT Mindy! Yay! :

We don't have an orientation, we just accompany the kiddos on their first day and the newsletter said if they're still not happy to leave us on Wednesday we may come that day as well. I'm thinking it will be better for Ainsley if I don't come Wednesday as much as I'll want to.

I'll keep everyone posted!