Babywise has to be stopped. Who's with me?

[SpiralWoman]

So, I was just at Barnes & Nobles in my area & they had 4 stacks of the Baby Wise books on the shelf!!! It looked like they had just opened a new box! Thankfully they were all on the bottom shelf. They have a new looking cover. DH thought it said: "Gary Ezzo, MD" But actually he has added a co-author who is an MD, trying to lend the book some mainstream credibility. Scary! I stood there & ranted about how dangerous they are, but nobody nearby was actually looking at parenting. Whoops.

I just typed "babywise" into my search bar @ MSN, and after the 1st 3 Barnes & Nobles hits to buy the darn thing (and 1 walmart hit later on) the rest of the hits are critical of the book, like this one:

quote:
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On Becoming Babywise: A Flawed Parenting Philosophy? Baby care book could be dangerous (Child magazine, August 1998). Babywise advice linked to dehydration, failure to thrive ("AAP News," April 1998). ... and highly controversial childcare guides On Becoming Babywise and Babywise II, written by Gary Ezzo, a self-described ...
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Really, I wonder if B&N does know about the content of this book or not? They seem to be the main folks selling it...hmmm, wonder who owns B&N? Is a nationwide boycott needed?

I am trying to organize something, maybe a letter writing or call in campaign to educate store managers about these books? I want to bring this up at the next AP meeting too.

After babies reach only 6 months of age, parents are instructed to begin punitive disciplinary measures such as "squeezing or swatting" of the child's hands or "isolation" in the crib for "rebellious" infractions including "foolishness," "malicious defiance" or even playing with food on the highchair tray. Ezzo explains to parents that the use of "pain" and "discomfort" can be essential disciplinary tools. After age 2 and a half, children who have a toileting accident are required to clean themselves up.

this quote is a small part of a salon.com article from 1998. That is 5 years ago & Ezzo has not gone away.

A search here @ MDC on "Ezzo" or "babywise" will find a bunch of threads & in them, links. I did this once & boy, it was shocking. For instance, 1 of the chapters is titled: "Pitfalls of Baby-centered parenting" or something like that. This is the anti-attachment parenting book. SO SO sad. It is way not even mainstream parenting. The other sad thing is his philosophy is "based on" christian principles. Ask Dr Sears about that. Even the search hits I got critical of him were from Christianity today, etc!

Anyone with more info on already established organizing against this book, or ideas, please post! (Also, if you find anything in this post innacurate, pls let me know so I can edit & correct, it is late)

[Elphaba]

contacting store managers won't do a thing. they don't choose which books are stocked in which quantities. that is done at a national level. there are book buyers for each section who decide which books go in each section and how many to buy. the restocking is done according to sales levels.
as for the placement on shelves, high vs. low, they're done alphabetically except in the case of a special display, promotion, or dump (those cardboard things that get in your way when you're walking around).
if it didn't sell, it wouldn't be reordered. the only way to stop Babywise is to educate people about it and stop them from buying it in the first place.
Hiding them doesn't help, it just pisses off the underpaid bookstore employees. Ranting and raving to managers or regular booksellers is also ineffective. They have no power.
You could try writing letters to your local newspaper(s), write an article on the dangers of his method and submit it to parenting magazines of all kinds, and contact churches who teach his classes and let them know the adverse effects this method has on babies and their parents.
I would say contact the publisher, but his original publisher dropped him and he has his own publishing company now, so you'd only be telling him how evil he is. Pointless.
Oh, and there's more than just 2 books out by him. There's Babywise I and Babywise II, Childwise and Teenwise. And that was just the last time I checked that section in depth so he very well may have written more poisonous tracts since then.
Have you been to www.ezzo.info ? You may find more ways to fight his message at that site, including printing out stickers and bookmarks and placing them in/on each of his books.

[luckylady]

Elphaba, that's what I do - they have a pamplet you can print at home and take with you and put in the books. It's my personal mission to save babies frm babywise!

[mrzmeg]

Here's a page with shorter graphics that can be printed as bookmarks or stickers:
http://www.geocities.com/antiezzo/

I'm going to take a field trip to B&N later this week

[JessicaS]

Since when is he a MD??

I don't think he is a medical doctor how on earth can he call himself a Dr if he isn't?? Isn't his doctorate in theology??

Isn't it illegal to call yourself a MD if you are not?

[mahdokht]

***

[JessicaS]

Majorly Demented??

[SpiralWoman]

about the MD thing:
I will edit my original post. DH was looking @ the cover & said "it says he is a doctor" & I was like "NO WAY" but now I see that he has added a "co-author" to the book who is apparently an MD. The MD was by his name, not by Ezzo's. But you can see how this very tactic is designed to lend mainstream credibility to the book. 1) take out the scriptural references 2) add a MD "coauthor" in big letters to the cover 3) revamp the cover in the newest slickest appealing graphics
scaryscaryscary

also, I realize I am trying to reinvent the wheel here & better people than I have been outraged by Ezzo & these books. I agree that store managers @ B&N can't do anything. I have it on my to-do list to call around the other big chains, Borders, Books-A-Million, what else? & see if it is a stocked book. If B&N is the only one (& Amazon) I think it's *possible* that a threatened boycott could get the buyers attention. Anyway, it's also on my to-do list to sticker those books!!!

[Elphaba]

no, B&N is not the only one. i worked for borders for a long time and we always had tons of it. i would secretly send them back to the publisher, but the f-ing things would come back the next week. <shrug> at least they were off the shelf for a while!

[~Megan~]

I've talked with several clercks and book stores headquarters people about those books.
Apparently they pulled the books after the AAP discrediting. So Ezzo wrote a new version and that is what is on the shelves now.

[HeatherSanders]

Originally posted by Elphaba
Have you been to www.ezzo.info ? You may find more ways to fight his message at that site, including printing out stickers and bookmarks and placing them in/on each of his books.

I SOOO want to do this - I'm going now! Tee Hee! I was so frustrated trying to find something for ME to read at B&N. Their magazine selection bites. At least Border's has Mothering. But even then it was behind all the mainstream yucka, advertising-mecca mags. Pfeh blah :Puke

Thanks Elphaba!

BTW: Have you already tackled these shelves here?

[Elphaba]

no, i meant to sticker the stuff at borders, but a certain toddler destroyed our printer, so that's out.
oh, the reason Mothering is on the second tier instead of the first is there's fewer copies. when there's a buttload of a particular magazine it has to go up front because that is the widest shelf. it ain't favoritism, i swear! when Mothering is equal in number to those other mags, i swap 'em so Mothering is up front!
i have however talked several moms and moms to be out of purchasing that stuff. i just mentioned how the AAP issued warnings against it and they were shocked and said they would tell other people. and i tell women who are not yet pregnant about how evil it is. i figure the best defense is getting to people who don't have kids yet since they won't see it as a criticism of their own choices, whereas someone who did sleep train and restrict nursing is going to be pretty defensive.

[HeatherSanders]

Yea, well I could write a book on how it can thwart a relationship . . . just ask me. I was given an Ezzo book and against every grain of 'motherly intuition' I had - I followed it. I don't know if I thought it would make me a good mother or if I just lacked the snuff to believe that internally I was a good mother, but let's just say I cried WITH my daughter.

We finally abandoned its guidelines - but that was closer to 9 months and I think the 'damage' was done. I say 'damage,' because our oldest still lacks the attachment that our 10 month old and our 3 1/2 year old have with us. And though she will sit in our laps, talk with us and the same, she truly has a bit of 'distance' that several years later we really 'work' to close.

Just a sad testimony of how embracing someone else's 'truth' without believing in yourself can harm.

[MisfitMama]

Babywise

Hello,

I hope I am posting this in the right place. This is very interesting timing that you suddenly bring up Babywise, because 2 days ago I just sent a bulk email warning EVERYONE I KNOW about the book, and asking them to please forward my post to others. It was a very inoffensive, unbiased email (well, I think so!) with a link to www.ezzo.info

If anyone wants to PM me, I'll fwd it to you and you can all innocently fwd it to anyone you suspect might be using Babywise.

I also was just at the thrift store today looking for a copy of it. I am going to have a website one day soon, with a big long rant about that scary book, so I'd like to get a hold of the old version and the new version.

If you go to Amazon.com reviews, there is QUITE a raging debate! Also, I emailed Amazon and insulted them for stocking the book, but they sent me back a form letter about how not stocking it would be "censorship." They said they will stock anything but child porn. I guess child abuse is O.K. with them. . .

Well, count me in on any anti-Babywise campaigns. I have lain awake many a night, staring at the ceiling and worrying about it. To make matters worse, I have 2 friends using it. One of them refuses to go to the ezzo.info sight. The other one did go, and thank God she has stopped depriving her baby of food. However, she is still using CHILDWISE. . . (another thing I need to get my hands on.)

For fun and entertainment (if you can stomach it) you can also go to the Growing Families International website, and torment the people there. However, from what I have gathered from the ezzo.info website, Gary Ezzo is monitoring all the email there himself, or he has programmed people like robots who do his will, or something. I think everything is monitored by him and no-one is allowed to have an original thought. I emailed them with some semi-genuine questions, just to see what they would say. The replies are just what I would have expected.

BTW, I found a *very* compelling Christian anti-spanking argument. I don't have the link offhand, but does anyone want it? "Childwise," so far as I can gather, is all about child beating.

Okay, I could go on and on. . . but I have to stop myself or I won't be able to sleep tonight.

MisfitMama

[HeatherSanders]

T My husband and I enjoyed a seminar on The Five Love Languages of Children. - - Just for an alternative to offer or GIVE.

Focuses on how children express love, so parents, siblings, care-givers can learn them and express love back to them in a way that closely fits their 'love language.'

Our two that are old enough to figure are so different, but this was very interesting - they have this for marriages too!

Okay back on topic!

[acystay]

I'm so glad to get those stickers and pamphlets! Okay here I go to B&N to my evil duty!

And I don't quiet understand even if it's been re-pulished after the AAP warning why is it still there? Could it be b/c he toned down the PDF a little bit? I know it's horrid routine to follow but if I remember reading it correctly he does say something that if you baby is hungry feed him/her. I never made it to the swating. Is that in the current editions as well b/c there are several AAP warnings about spanking and hitting and that detached parents create children who feel unloved, etc.

[luckylady]

Here is a great link you can send to any mama's that are Christian and who belong to a chuch that supports babywise.

http://www.gentlemothering.com/index.html

My friend who adopted a baby was given babywise and I begged her to throw it out. I asked her, Do you think Mary let jesus CIO and put him on a schedule like a robot? I doubt it. People treat their freaking dogs better. Grrrrrrr

[Kam]

I haven't read Ezzo's books, but I have read through some things at his website and find his advice to be extraordinarily disturbing. I am with you in wanting to fight his influence with information! I printed out a few pages of the AMA warning and of the Sears's quote and hope to get to B&N tomorrow (after voting, of course ) to slip them in a few copies. Thanks for the good idea!

This is a little thing, but I do wonder about putting stickers on books at a bookstore, though. It just doesn't sit right with me somehow. Maybe it is that old "destruction of property" thing. Wouldn't it be just as effective to put bookmarks in the books? I am all for fighting the power, but B&N is not exactly promoting Ezzo by simply carrying his books. Let's do this in a gentle and respectful way--I know we can!

warmly,
Kam, mamamamamama! to Meg, who just turned a year and a half six minutes ago

[Lucysmama]

Original post edited because I wrote this in the middle of the night and I sounded like a book-burning censorship advocate! I do not advocate censorship of ANY book, and didn't wanna offend anyone by accidentally sounding this way!


I say we start a calling or letter-writing campaign to major booksellers who display dozens of copies like they recommend it!
There are 11,000 members here at MDC...and I don't know about ya'll, but I know a *hell of a lot of people*. I just want to let them know that this book is objectionable to some, the AMA warns against it, etc. (see next post of mine for more detailed explanation!)

You can call B and N at 1-800-THE-BOOK. I will try to find a link to write to B and N corporate, as well as Borders.

Let's go, mamas!

[MisfitMama]

IMPORTANT:

Anyone who is going to the bookstore or to write a letter, etc. - you might want to pay attention to the fact that there are 2 editions of Babywise. So far as I can gather, the AAP/ Orange County warnings are for the first edition. I think that after he lost his publishing contract (!) he totally changed the book. I believe he now says that parents should feed on demand (except at night, I'm sure, and during the prescribed nap times.)

OOPS! Baby is calling!

MisfitMama