i'm totally a "spirited" introvert!
ahhh yes the nightime knees in the face, swatting, kicking, climbing all over me at 2,3,4,5, in the morning. arrgghh. this weekend was hell for sleeping! i think our bed is just too small and if ds is right next to me he wants boob all.night.long. i posted in nightime parenting about it...
|How do the rest of you deal with other people (especially your SOs) and their relationships with your spirited child?
i feel really lucky that my dh is a very very patient person. more so than i. otherwise i would probably lose my mind. i might honestly have to have a babysitter come by a couple times a week just to make sure i stayed calm and sane. i'm sorry you don't have a good support there with you dh, lisabeeprague
since i'm the one that lacks patience and burns out faster i try to communicate to dh when i need a break and he is pretty good about stepping in before i lose my cool. i also let dh know that he may be ok with Tobias' roughhousing around and climbing all over him but i'm not and that i need to have my own relationship/boundaries with him.
i don't like it, for example, when i say to Tobias that it's not ok to pull mama's hair and i set him down on the floor for him (and i) to calm down and dh will pick him up in a defensive way. dh and i are individuals and it's ok for Tobias to have his own relationship with each of us. dh doesn't need to be overly protective of him when i'm being firm with what's not ok to me. i don't say it meanly or harshly but it is said seriously and sometimes i think dh projects his own issues onto ds. dh was a "mama's boy" and a very spirited child. his grandma wasn't very nice to him as a kid because of it so i think he's sensitive w/ Toby not feeling rejected.lisabeeprague
-is there a way that your dh can play with your dd or take her for a walk/out of the house at a calm time of day so you get a break and the icky power struggle things are left to the parent that handles it better (you
i've been taking T. to organized play groups where there is a good mix of ages (3 and under) in a totally safe space with new and different toys. he likes the older toddlers and burns off lots of energy in crawling around after them. the moms seem pretty understanding of his "barging in" since he is still a wee one and a very smiley guy! i don't hover parent but i do make sure he isn't whacking a baby or inflicting any harm on another child. the older kids are pretty good about letting him play along side them and he likes the company. i certainly like not having to be 100% in charge of his "entertainment" for an hour or two! it gives me a much needed mental break. he's usually pretty ready for his nap when we come home so it makes for a good day together.