Breastfeeding Support Annoyance

[phsargent]

So my wife breastfeeds. (I dont know all the abbreviations that she/we do)

We are driving back from our Labor Day road trip. We were 30 miles from home, but we stopped for the kids because they were restless. They played in the play area for awhile.

Now after giving the kids two notices that we were leaving (first time was my fault for not following through; the second my wife started taking pictures when the kids ran back into the play area) I finally get the kids to respond to the third notice.

We are just about to the car when my wife announces she wants to top off the one year old before we head out. Now I'm anxious to get home, and our one year old just ate, so I pushed for leaving and we'll see how the one year old does.

We start out, and the one year old starts to fuss. My wife talks about how she wanted to feed, etc. I pull into a gas station to accomodate my wife. She gets our one year out to feed, and I take the 3 year old into the station for a treat. I get back into the car, which distracts the one year old, and I hear, "Nurse, or you are going back into your seat."

Now we stopped solely so she could nurse. Why would she say that?

Another other supportive spouses of breastfeeders that have stories of their buttons being pushed?

[claras_mom]

Sounds to me like you were right the first time....the 1 yo wasn't that hungry, certainly not hungry enough to latch on enthusiastically. Probably fussing for another reason, like being in the car.

[ewink]

BTDT, but then in your wife's shoes. She most likely said that b/c she knew you were annoyed in the first place about having to stop again, so she got anxious when the baby got distracted and stopped nursing, knowing that the baby better nurse now, fast....

[Momtwice]

She was probably as frustrated as you were. I think she heard the baby fuss, thought nursing was needed/would help, and then when the baby refused to nurse she was frustrated. Like you, she wanted the trip home to be as pleasant as possible and she thought nursing would help achieve that.

When a nursing mom hears their baby cry or fuss, they get a biological reaction....a rush of hormones that urge them to pick up the child and a rush of milk to the breasts (let down reflex) that makes the mom need to nurse.

And one year olds often want to nurse for just a moment, frequently...also normal, and yet frustrating while traveling by car especially!

[Gabby'sDaddy]

my wife breastfeeds also and it can get annoying... if we go out in public, she will nurse, but it seems all gabby want to do is just "know" its there... but gosh she is almost 2.. shouldn't she on with other things, like looking at birds for cars fro distractions..

[MommaCrystal]

My one year old is an extremely distracted nurser. The rest of the family climbing back into the car would ensure a pop off and a look for play time for a few minutes until it dawned on him what he was doing.

[PJJ]

yes, the bond is strong

Originally Posted by Gabby'sDaddy

my wife breastfeeds also and it can get annoying... if we go out in public, she will nurse, but it seems all gabby want to do is just "know" its there... but gosh she is almost 2.. shouldn't she on with other things, like looking at birds for cars fro distractions..

Isn't that great that your wife is meeting the needs of your 2yo?

[Ahappymel]

Originally Posted by PJJ

Isn't that great that your wife is meeting the needs of your 2yo?

:

Attachment parenting:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Attachment_parenting

[vegemamato]

as a mom breastfeeding her third..

we have been in very similar situations (in a hurry, fussy just-fed baby) and, honestly, I would be very annoyed if my partner were trying to rush me. I do my best to help the babe concentrate if I know that T is anxious about leaving/doing something else, but bottom line is that I can't be content unless I feel that my children are satisfied. I also can't sit in the front seat of a car while my baby is unhappy in the back (hence, riding in the back with her 99% of the time). So, while I understand your annoyance, I do have a bit of sympathy for your wife, and baby.

also, were you in a rush to do something specific or just trying to get home? I can't speak for all of us, but I occasionally miss those "I need to ___" cues from my partner because I'm too focused on the kids and/or other things going on in my head.

I do agree that she probably saw your frustration and most likely tried to encourage the baby to nurse [with more efficiency] when she saw you coming, sounds reasonable.

I hope you two were able to discuss this, or just let it go.

peace