Anyone else's dcs having adjustment issues?

[tanyam926]

So we are about 10 days away from my due date and my ds1 who is 5 1/2 started kinder about 2 or 3 wks ago. He is having trouble adjusting even though he went to pre-k last year (not same school) and did wonderfully and has loved school all along.

So it seems it may have more to do w/baby coming than just w/adjusting to school.

I feel so sad about this bc I know what a great kid he is and I want that to shine through. The first couple of days he said he hated school. He has been doing better and having good days since then but I got a call from the counselor today (who has been talking to him about why he hates school for the past couple of wks) who said that he grabbed and pushed another kid down. That is so unlike him bc he is not aggressive at all.

So, how do I make this better. I feel like maybe dh and I should each spend some one on one time w/him and maybe that would help. If he feels pushed aside now (especially w/ds2 who is 3) he will only feel it more once baby is here.

I am just so sad about this. What are you all doing (if anything) w/your dcs if you are having any adjustment issues at your home.

I know ds1 acted out a little before ds2 was born and then took a couple of months to act totally like himself again (he was almost 3 when brother was born).

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**Update:**

So after talking to my son after school I found out that he and his friend were play fighting and were showing each other their "cool moves", the teacher or whoever intervened only saw the last move my son did and then intervened. My son was not upset but he did apologize w/a little card to his friend. If they had been really arguing and my son was agressive w/his classmate then he would have been upset about the whole thing. He said he had a good day and didn't get into trouble.

So, I think he is doing okay. My hormones are just crazy and I felt like crying today just thinking that my little boy is not doing well at school or feels sad about anything. We went bowling (dh's suggestion) and had some great family time after school and we talked to him about only play wrestling at home and not at school bc someone could get hurt.

Okay, so I don't feel like a crappy mom anymore. I really want this baby to be welcomed by both my sons and not looked at as an intruder KWIM?

Thanks guys! A new kiddo in the family is a big adjustment for everyone but it sounds like we are all doing a great job of easing the transition.

[SkyMomma]

I don't have any advice, just wanted to write that my DS1 started Kinder today (only 1 hour), tomorrow is his first full day. I'm really worried & sad for him--he's never went to preschool or anything like that. Your post is my fear! With a new baby on the way & the transition to school, I'm really expecting all kinds of adjustment issues to play out. Although my hope is that the new friends & time without a little baby around will help him feel special & distracted.

I just wanted to send you some positive energy & tell you that I appreciate how lovingly you write about your child. Good luck with it all.

[Mamato3wild ponnie]

My ds is 3 1/2 and still nursing, over the past few days he wants to nurse a whole lot more than he has in the past year. I'm due in 12 days and i can tell he wants to be all over me here lately. It doesnt help that family is telling him that he will have to share "ninnie" with the baby and is he ready for the baby. So i think with the unwanted comments it's gotten worse. I'm giving him all the love and sympathy that i can. I understand that he is more sensitive right now and that is ok. It's just hard that he wants to nurse so much. I get such strong BH when he nurses and it's so uncomfortable. But he'll rub my belly while he's nursing...how sweet...and he "helps" me up off the floor when i'm sitting playing with him. I think he's handling everything fairly well thus far.

[LegalScrapper]

My DD is 4 1/2. She alternates between being really excited (like today at her sibling tour) and being clingy. She wants a TON of snuggles lately, which is great with me since my energy level is non-existent.

She did have one major meltdown. She insisted that her and Daddy were going to buy another house and move. She got really upset when I laughed as if it were a joke. She kept insisting they were moving. I told her I'd be sad if she moved away. She finally said, "But you'll have baby benjamin and won't need me." It broke my heart. Since then she's been asking, "will you still love me if I'm bad?" "do you still love me when I'm in time out?"

I keep telling her I will love her "always and forever, no matter what."

I did buy some quiet activity things at the Dollar Store to do with her after the baby arrives. So she can have some stuff to do with me when I'm nursing.

And I read in a parenting magazine to put the older sibling in charge of hand-washing and sanitizer. (1) because it gives them something to do and (2) because kids can get away with telling adults "no you can't hold the baby until you wash your hands."