Do you do quiet time instead of naps?

[kananaskismama]

DD is 3 and no longer naps. She is up at 6:00am and in bed by 7pm. Her little brother is almost 2 and naps like a dream from 12-2. DD needs her nap and has trouble getting through the afternoon without it (major tantrums, screaming, hyperactivity, pulling things off of the shelves etc.). Despite her extreme tiredness it is very difficult to get her to nap.
Also, I like having a little break to get some rest before the afternoon and tidy up, prep supper etc. but if I put her in her bedroom for quiet time she empties her closet, drawers and takes everything off of the bed. I think she is trying to keep herself awake. If I let her read, she will tear pages out of the books.

Does anyone have any quiet time advice?

[milehighmonkeys]

We do have quiet time, but DD reads during that time. What about board books? What about a magna doodle? DD has little people in her room that she plays with sometimes, too. You can make them stay in their rooms, but you can't make them sleep, whether they need it or not. DD hasn't napped for about 1.5 years. She just turned 4. Even though DD only "rests" in her room, it makes a big difference in her attitude. She needs a break even though she doesn't sleep.

[MamaRabbit]

We do quiet time. He has to stay on his bed until the timer goes off. If the babies are sleeping in his room, then it's the sofa or my bed. Pretty much anything quiet goes - books, Thomas Train flash cards, a car he drives quietly around the bed, his doll he wraps up. QUIET is the key word.

[Ashersmum]

Ds1 is 4 and he has quiet time for an hour in his room every day. It's up to him what he does in that time as long as he isn't being too noisy. He'll usually read (he used to tear out pages of books too, but I just taped them back together), play with legos, or do some imaginary games with his trains and cars. He looks forward to quiet time - it's designated time for him to do what he wants with no interruption. Every now and then he will fall asleep if he needs to. I don't set a timer, he amazingly just knows when an hour is up and sometimes he's having such a good time playing that he chooses to stay in there longer, or he tells me to come back later if I open the door.

I say just let her empty her closets and do whatever she wants to do during her alone time. You can always clean up later and it still gives you (and her) that break. You might also try putting her to bed a half hour earlier for a while to see if that helps with the tiredness from not napping. My son used to go to bed at 6:30pm and woke up at 6am.

[lizardmom]

We do quiet time and I think it is really good for my daughter to help her "unwind". But my dd has a hard time staying in there longer than about 30 minutes. She is 3 1/2 and wants constant attention. How long do you keep your kids in quiet time?

[foxtrot]

My DS is 5 now and in kindergarten full day, but I never did quiet time with him. I actually took away his nap at 3.5 because with it he'd be up till 11pm every night. He loved his nap and wanted it, but I just couldn't deal with the late nights anymore.

I just never felt quiet time was right. Putting him in his room for an hour or two or whatever seemed somehow wrong to me. But that's me.

[rahans]

DD (3.5) now does quiet time on the couch. Not ideal - I would prefer her room but she would not stay up there no matter how hard I tried and I didn't want her waking up her younger brother. I tried quiet time in my bed too which didn't work either. She enjoys her quiet time on the couch with her blanket and some books to read. I pull the shades so she has dim light. Now, if only she would fall asleep on the couch!!

[Justmee]

We also do quiet time. All three in the room together. I have to keep popping in or it turns into wild time, but it does work to give them a rest in the day.

[milehighmonkeys]

Originally Posted by lizardmom

How long do you keep your kids in quiet time?

On average, I would estimate about an hour. DD gets rather cranky if she doesn't get her quiet time. All kids are different. Ours needs a little down time during the day. She is easily over stimulated and needs that time to reset her sensitivities, so to speak. Also, it gives her to opportunity to nap, should she need to do so. For example, she was feeling a little under the weather yesterday. She went upstairs for quiet time and almost immediately fell asleep. If she didn't have to opportunity to be quiet for a while lay down, she would just keep going and going. Then she would be overtired and there would be no getting her to bed, and clearly, she needs some rest.

[littleaugustbaby]

My DD stopped napping at about 18 months, and for the life of me, I just could NOT get her to nap, or do quiet time in her room, so I never bothered. The summer before she started preschool, I started trying to see if I could get her to nap, since I knew that they napped at preschool, and I wanted her to be ready.

So, I started wearing her out in the morning as much as I could. Walks outside, outdoor play, etc. Then after lunch, I'd have her lie down on the couch for quiet time. No talking, no books, etc. I told her that she did not have to sleep, but she did have to lay quietly, and that it would be good if she would close her eyes. Then I would set a timer, and as soon as it went off, she was free to get up. The first couple of days, I set the timer for 10-15 minutes, and by the end of that time, I could tell she was getting tired -- but as soon as the timer went off, she was up. So then I started setting the timer for 20-30 minutes, and she started falling asleep. It made the transition to pre-k much easier!

[Fuamami]

I do quiet time for my dd, but she's five. My 3 yo still naps (where's the smiley for knocking on wood)?

Anyway, have you tried books on tape? Our library has downloadable books, so I can burn a CD for her, or I check them out. She loves to listen to them and gets a nice break while I work.

[FreeRangeMama]

My kids are 7, 5, 3, and 1 and I do quiet time for them during our school year as part of our daily rhythm. It is a great opportunity for them to learn how to relax, take a break, and recharge for the afternoon. It is great for all of us to be comfortable just taking that time for ourselves to do what nurtures us and to spend a little time away from each other (we homeschool).

For the 5 & 7 yo I have hammock chairs in their room (they share a room). They love to hang in the hammock chairs and listen to books on CD. It is great for them and they are so much more centred for the afternoon.

Dd1 is 3. She (like her older brothers) gave up naps at around 20 months. I don't care what she does as long as it is quiet. She doesn't have to stay in her room (I wouldn't forcibly confine any of them), but she needs to play quietly. She does enjoy the opportunity to play by herself and will either play quietly in a corner of the boys' room while they listen to the book CD or she will play quietly in her room.

Dd2 naps and I take a short nap with her then read or do something else to recharge MY batteries as well

I really notice a huge difference between when we do quiet time and when we don't. Everyone is so much more centred and happy when we make the effort. The kids actually ASK for quiet time so I feel like they must feel better with it as well. I don't believe in forcing kids to do stuff so I prefer to make it a desirable thing for them instead. That leaves them open to the experience rather than turning it into a power struggle.

Anyway, that is what works for us....

Could you buy some special toys, CD's, etc. for your dd that only comes out at quiet time? Something that makes it an even to look forward to? Maybe that will change her perception and help it become a cherished part of the routine instead of something she fights against with destructiveness? Just an idea

[SkyMomma]

My DS1 is almost 5 & we do 'quiet time' mostly because I desperately need to nap (9 months pregnant!). DS usually listens to books on cd, which he loves. I set him up with a snack, all cozy in a comfy chair, & he listens to all kinds of stories for an hour (by kitchen timer). If he gets lonely, he's welcome to quietly come into bed with me & read, but I ask him not to wake me up or he gets a very grumpy mama. He almost always stays in his chair or quietly plays while he listens. I find that this 'down-time' helps both of us.

When DS was younger, we did the books on cd, but for shorter times. This and reading together were our 'quiet time'. We never really restricted him to his room, I was more likely to want to restrict myself to mine! I think it helps that we use 'quiet-time' as a rest time for everyone...not just him.

[kananaskismama]

Thank you to everyone that posted a reply. I'm encouraged to hear successful quiet time stories and I like the ideas that were suggested. DD loves stories, so books on tape may be something she will enjoy. I think I need to relax about her emptying the closet. My problem is when she is being destructive - ripping books or shredding up baskets. She will rip the pages out of board books.
I like the timer idea too. And perhaps I can get her something special to play with during her quiet time. I was thinking about a simple dollhouse that her brother won't be able to play with - she would like that.
After a wild afternoon yesterday with DD I started her bedtime routine at 5:00. She was in bed and asleep by 5:30. She was completely exhausted. And she slept until nearly 7 this morning. This confirms to me that she needs more than 12 hours of sleep. She is much more pleasant to be around today.