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PPD Tears...How do you cope?

post #1 of 23
Thread Starter 
I reached out for help but the unthinkable has happened to me, my child and I are separated till I get better..

and I sought help, but Dr's offices are telling me they are overbooked and if they dont return my 72hrs, to call them back again.

I have been suffering from PPD since I foundout I was pregnant...after giving birth I went on wellbutrin. but I had to go off of it cause the insurence ran out and I could NOT afford $132 for a bottle of meds. Because I rather buy diapers for my baby. I am on vacation in Illinois from OKlahoma right now while all this is going on.

If anyone knows of a support group in the northwest burbs of chicago that can help till I hear back from drs let me know. I want to get help but it feels like no one wants to help me after I make the calls for help.

I am missing my babygirl greatly and still feel disconnected when I am in the room with her. I love her but I want the disconnection to go away. any thoughts on how to get rid of it?

I am taking st johns wart and vitmin c, b-complex, b-6 and potassium. Im trying to help myself till the dr's can call me back and schedule me for an appt
does anyone have advice for me? yes I go for walks
post #2 of 23

No advice, and I live no where near you, but I wanted to send a hug anyhow. You should check http://www.gskforyou.com/ to see if you can get your meds for free. Best of luck.
post #3 of 23
I have had good luck with 5-HTP supplements. I was prescribed them by my naturopath and they made a huge difference for me. I could be loving again. I hope you find what you need.

post #4 of 23
Wellbutrin is available as a generic. Can you get the list of $4/month or $10/90 day generics from walmart/walgreens/kmart? When separated from your baby it's good to get better ASAP and I think pharmaceuticals are helpful for that.
post #5 of 23
First off, . You're going through an awful time and there's no way I can ever imagine how you're feeling.

That said, you can beat this. You can get better. You can get your daughter back. It sounds like you're in desperate need of an evaluation a.s.a.p. Please note that many states have laws regarding scheduling of urgent matters. For example, in my state, there are laws surrounding counseling. I used to work for a psychologist, and we had to abide by certain standards for offering an appointment. A lot of it has to do with the words you use while speaking with the counseling intake receptionists. For example, if we heard that a person was feeling suicidal/homicidal, we advised an emergency room visit immediately and offered an appointment within 24 hours. If someone had an urgent situation, we had to schedule within 2-3 days. Otherwise, we offered a time within a week. We had access to a psychiatrist who prescribed antidepressants.

Also note that ER's can't refuse treatment because you can't afford it. Perhaps that would even be the best treatment for you; they can oftentimes provide you with more resources than a common person could access. There are programs through Community Mental Health which can assist with medication costs. Reach out to these resources. Call a therapist. Call every doctor you can find until one will see you immediately. And by all means, visit the ER if you're feeling at all suicidal or homicidal.

You can do this. But you can't do this alone. My heart breaks for how sad and hopeless your post sounds. It will take one step at a time, but the first step is intervention with someone who can take your hand and walk you through it. Do whatever you need to do to get an appointment as soon as possible. Once you begin getting help, I think you'll be surprised at how your perspective will change.

Have you read, "Down Came The Rain" by Brooke Shields? Pick up a copy from the library and read it if you can. It helped me when I was going through PPD for the first time.

Please feel free to PM me for my phone number if you ever need to talk; I'm more than willing to lend an ear or be a sounding board. And call your local CMH or ER to get some referrals to public offices that can help you. Help is out there; you just need to reach out to someone who is willing to help. I'm so sorry you're suffering.
post #6 of 23

I just want to tell you that you're not alone- MANY of us (myself included) have gone through what you're going through and made it through just fine...

Focus on small goals, shower everyday, eat well, get outside and get moving, try not to sit still. You CAN make it through. It will get better.
post #7 of 23
Hang in there, mama. It will get better. I promise. There are other meds that you can go on. See if you can get a different one.
post #8 of 23

Oh, mama that sounds so tough. I hope you get in to see a dr soon.

post #9 of 23
post #10 of 23
http://www.goodfat.net.nz/related+is...pression#polls liver is easy to take mixed in a fruit smoothie, just make sure it comes from a good source if you can and freeze it for two weeks. It's high in heat sensitive b vitamins. That link has a lot of other good suggestions besides that.
post #11 of 23
Originally Posted by DiceKitten View Post
does anyone have advice for me?
I've been thinking of you and we haven't heard anything more from you. How are you??
post #12 of 23
Thread Starter 
I heard from the state of illinois & I cannot get into the dr until the 10th of October. I have had 2 evaluations and I just had another one by the depression unit at Northen Illinois Univerisity. They told me i need a counselor and no drugs! They can tell I am very outgoing and fun edgy romantic artist! LOL
BUT I need to take time for myself and go out have fun and quit losing my identity in my daughter. in otherwards, hire a sitter and go out, DO NOT STAY HOME and NEGLECT MY NEEDS by putting my daughter first.
I cant help but put my daughter before me...Im guilty of that I know
They told me its ok to go and have fun at the museum like I want to. My daughter wil be ok.

My next trial date in court for having Post Partum is October 21st and November 3rd. I hope I get my daughter back.

In August I was feeling blue and I went to a free place or help and they took my daughter away. I AM NOT SUICIDAL and I DO NOT WANT TO HURT MY DAUGHTER.

Now in the state of illinois if you go for help to a free center for post partum you will have your child taken away till they make sure you are ok. Something happened to a child that was returned to their mother whio was suffering from post partum. thats why the state of illinois takes the child away and places them with family mbrs. Your just better off going for private help.

Pray for me, anyone in Chicago area know of PPD Support Group?
or want to hangout for support?

My sister who is my daughters foster mommy wants to take my daughter with her family to disney world...Im having issues cause I dont want to miss those precious moments.
post #13 of 23
I just wanted to say I feel for you and have been there, and just wanted to let you know things will get better.
post #14 of 23
Oh my goodness, I can't believe they just take your child away! That would be awful! I hope everything works out for you and that you are feeling better and get to be with your baby again soon
post #15 of 23
Thread Starter 
1st off everyone thanks for your support and well wishing.
I still dont have my daughter back but she is in the care of my Sister.
I do recieve a 1hr visit 1 day a week tho its not enough!

State of Illinois does remove children from the PPD Mother now!
they didnt do it before and a baby in southern illinois died because DCFS ignored the pleas for help from the PPD Mom.

I HUGELY SUGGEST going for private care! Dont go for state Aid because the DCFS WOrkers are NOT trained in PPD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I got a WELL KNOWN Lawyer and hes awesome! If ya need his name and number I will reccomend him.

But so far I ahve been on 5 Psych Testings and still they keep sending me to more shrinks for more interviews, I have not been treated and this has been going on since Aug 13...2 mo's!

The state claims they have to many cases going on right now to help me!
I just have to keep jumping through hoops like a circus poodle

Im at the point of starting a movement to help educate the caseworkers on what PPD actually is and get the family mbrs of the mothers suffering to help them out and not ignore the warning signs!
post #16 of 23
What ever happened? I'm going through a similar situation and hope your life is back to the happy side.
post #17 of 23
Thread Starter 
I'm on Pscychiatric Drugs and I gained 25lbs as result of the prescribed drugs. I went for Counseling at the Alexian Brothers Behaverial Health Hospital

Now the state of illinois is treating me like I abused my child because I put her in harms with my so called mental illness/PPD is considered a mental illiness!!!

I have to attend court tommorrow and take parenting classes!
Yup I have to be treated like a child abuser now! All I did was reach out for help at a Gov't funded facility! It sucks

Pray for me, or cast spells of luckiness or whatever your beliefs may be I ask that you ask god or the universe to return my child to me tommorrow

Yes Im still mad the state.
post #18 of 23

Follow Up

What ever happened? Are you doing better? Do you have your baby back?
post #19 of 23
Thread Starter 
I got my daughter back July 15th but I am still being watched by the court and have continued psychological testing monthly. A therapist comes to the house, but that is so stupid, all she does is watch me play with my daughter and doesn't help me one bit.

my next court date is in November
post #20 of 23
I'm so sorry you're going through all of this

How's your little one doing?
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