Do you share money? - Page 3

[llamalluv]

Originally Posted by avengingophelia

what does this mean?

Usually that when he says, "My shoulders are killing me!" I correct him and remind him that those are my shoulders and he has to let me rub them. God says so.

[Llyra]

Shared. I manage all our money, though, by his request-- he's hopeless at it, so about a year ago he begged me to take over, and we're both very happy with the arrangement. I budget for everything, and if he wants something he asks me if we can afford it. It doesn't come up often-- we don't really have any money "left over" for purchases made just for fun, so the question of how to spend such money is really a moot point. Every dollar we have is needed in four separate places, for very essential things, and DH trusts me to make sure it's spent in the wisest way.

[lovbeingamommy]

We have everything separate. It works out really well for us. However, my DH gives me money every month since I make way less than him.

[Turquesa]

We used to keep it all separate. Then I left my job to be a SAHM. I kept tapping into savings to fuel my checking account, so it seemed absurd to have it. DH and I merged and, now that I'm home, I'm in charge of tracking, balancing, and budgeting our finances.

[LokiPuck]

Everything is separate, I mean everything. I have no access to any of DH's money, I do not even know exactly how much money he has or what he spends it on. He makes considerably more than me, his gross income is more than twice mine is.

Granted, he pays the mortgage, utility bill, phone, cable, some of the groceries, etc. But I pay the daycare bill, some of the groceries, gas/maint./repairs for my vehicle, all of of DS clothes, and all of DS medical bills not covered by insurance (copays, deductibles). Guess who comes up nearly broke before payday every single time? It sure as heck ain't him! And he still thinks I "owe" him money each month to offset the mortgage, utilities, and such. It makes me feel like a tenant living in his house rather than his wife.

I hate it, I absolutely hate it. I was against this set-up from the start. I wanted a joint account where all of OUR money went to pay bills. It wouldn't matter who pays how much of what because all of our money would be in one account together, it would all be going to pay our bills. DH just thinks I want to spend all of his money and bleed him dry. He has said many times he doesn't want me touching HIS money. Gee, I thougt all of it was OURS, regardless of who earns more.

On a somewhat related note, I just found out recently that DH has made no changes whatsoever to any of his assets since we've been married. My name is not on the deed to the house, I am not listed as benficiary of any life insurance (his parents are WTF?), retirement savings etc. I changed all of that stuff right after we got married so DH is beneficiary of all my life insurance, retirement savings, etc. I may not have much, but DH gets all of my assests if I die. What would my situation be if something (God forbid) happened to him. We don't have a will or anything drawn up. I honestly don't believe he has done any of this with any ill intent, he just never bothered to do anything about it. I have the feeling that I could really get screwed some day.

OK, that got really long and ranty. This whole thing just depresses me.

[Mrs. Cheerful Face]

We share a main account, and I have an account from parents to CYA... So, what's his is mine and what's mine is, uhm... mine? Call me the budget volcano...

[Mrs. Cheerful Face]

Unrelated, we always joke about how my standard of living would go up if he dies before me. Well it was funny at the time, anyway...

[Crazybean]

Originally Posted by avengingophelia

Somewhere in between. We each have separate savings, checking, and credit card accounts, but we also have joint checking and savings accounts and a joint mortgage, car title, etc. We each contribute to the joint accounts $X per month (based loosely on our incomes) and pay all joint expenses from that, and whatever is left in our personal accounts is personal money. This system works well for us and I don't plan to change it. I would personally not be comfortable not having my own private financial accounts.

This is how we do this too. However, we haven't had any extra for our personal accounts.. we are struggling to keep the joint account open:

[lactivistmama]

Originally Posted by dancebaraka

we share everything (well except that cash I got stashed in my undie drawer )

..yep that one

[kijip]

We have household and separate accounts but the income is shared equally- we pay towards the same bills, same savings and each have the same mad money amount. I make more than him and I can't imagine thinking that because of that, I deserve to spend more on non-household things.

[sunnysandiegan]

I chose 'other', so I am explaining...

We have a lot of accounts. Some are joint with rights of survivorship and some are individual with the spouse as beneficiary. We each know all the pertinent information for every account and we have taken turns being responsible for maintaining our family finances over the years.