Originally Posted by flminivanmama
my dh works about 60 hours a week. my children have grown up with him never around for meal time, home work time, bed time, sports, boy scouts, special events, holidays, etc. believe me I've thought about divorce. sometimes I think it might be easier than raising three active boys alone with this false pretext of a spouse.
if there was anything we *would* divorce over it would definitely be this.
also I doubt I'll ever forgive him for missing this much of children's youth....
so - I definitely get where they're coming from on this one.
We both WOH in our family. Additionally, dh quit his job and went back to graduate school when our younger was born, and then essentially missed (and I feel it was a choice, he did not have to spend every waking moment studying, it wasn't a difficult program and he has acknowledged as much since) the next three years of our lives. We have never gotten back to where we were emotionally and intimately since then. I felt so betrayed by him, even though he'd made the choice for the good of our family. It would go a long way for me I think if he would apologize for abandoning us, but he'll never see it that way I don't think. So I get Tucker too. I think Bailey has often chosen work when she could have chosen family. It's one thing to choose one over the other here and there, but they've shown her repeatedly choosing work over her family ever since she became a parent. Before the baby was born (sorry, I cannot for the life of me remember his name right now), she chose Tucker over work--remember their tenth anniversary? I work like crazy to be involved with my kids, at their events, making sure they don't miss out because I'm at work, etc. because that's what you don't get a second chance to change. I think Tucker was probably wrong to issue the ultimatum, and I think Bailey was right to see it for what it was, a declaration that no matter what, their marriage was over.