Looking for advice, book suggestions, etc..
I gained 60 lbs during my first pregnancy. I went from a size 4 to a size 16 (or medium in maternity). I have lost 40 of the 60lbs and my daughter is 11 months old.
I am back down to about a size 10 and 31" waste - I have 4" more to lose.
I am losing slowly due to breast feeding and I'm not terribly concerned, but I am really struggling with the feelings of grief over my body that has been lost as a result of the pregnancy.
I have tried to talk to some people and I either get "oh, honey, you look great and have nothing to worry about", or "you're too shallow - you have a beautiful child and such a good reason to have had your body changed". So, if you're going to say one of these or something similar, save your fingers.
I unfortunately don't have very elastic skin and ended up with a good amount of stretch marks that though now fading, my skin is permanently damaged as is to be expected. I am really struggling with my new body.
I have more fat to lose, which is happening slowly, and I will continue to work on regaining my muscle tone, but I feel as though I have gained a life and lost a body.
It does sound shallow.. but separating the fact that it is for a great reason... I feel grief over the change. My body changed so quickly and so permanently, I am almost mourning the loss, I think. (Maybe I just answered my own question.)
I am having a hard time being involved with those in my area who are part of a body re-toning group after pregnancy because no one sees what the big deal is and why I'm whining. So, I either just remain silent and work on my own or tell my husband how I feel and he honestly doesn't see my problem either. He thinks my new stomach, et al, is great and cute and a reminder that our daughter is here and all this is actually real (after a great many years of believing we'd never conceive). He is supportive and understanding but he does not understand my internal struggle either... Perhaps even I don't.
Anyone else out there dealt with something similar?
I'm not a particularly vane person, nor particularly beautiful, but I've never felt poorly about my body or my image, and now I do.
I don't want to diminish or resent the reason for the change because I love my daughter & am so blessed that my body made her, but I also hold resentment that I can't place due to the conflict within the first part of this sentence.
Rambling.... sorry
I gained 60 lbs during my first pregnancy. I went from a size 4 to a size 16 (or medium in maternity). I have lost 40 of the 60lbs and my daughter is 11 months old.
I am back down to about a size 10 and 31" waste - I have 4" more to lose.
I am losing slowly due to breast feeding and I'm not terribly concerned, but I am really struggling with the feelings of grief over my body that has been lost as a result of the pregnancy.
I have tried to talk to some people and I either get "oh, honey, you look great and have nothing to worry about", or "you're too shallow - you have a beautiful child and such a good reason to have had your body changed". So, if you're going to say one of these or something similar, save your fingers.
I unfortunately don't have very elastic skin and ended up with a good amount of stretch marks that though now fading, my skin is permanently damaged as is to be expected. I am really struggling with my new body.
I have more fat to lose, which is happening slowly, and I will continue to work on regaining my muscle tone, but I feel as though I have gained a life and lost a body.
It does sound shallow.. but separating the fact that it is for a great reason... I feel grief over the change. My body changed so quickly and so permanently, I am almost mourning the loss, I think. (Maybe I just answered my own question.)
I am having a hard time being involved with those in my area who are part of a body re-toning group after pregnancy because no one sees what the big deal is and why I'm whining. So, I either just remain silent and work on my own or tell my husband how I feel and he honestly doesn't see my problem either. He thinks my new stomach, et al, is great and cute and a reminder that our daughter is here and all this is actually real (after a great many years of believing we'd never conceive). He is supportive and understanding but he does not understand my internal struggle either... Perhaps even I don't.
Anyone else out there dealt with something similar?
I'm not a particularly vane person, nor particularly beautiful, but I've never felt poorly about my body or my image, and now I do.
I don't want to diminish or resent the reason for the change because I love my daughter & am so blessed that my body made her, but I also hold resentment that I can't place due to the conflict within the first part of this sentence.
Rambling.... sorry
