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Originally Posted by MSUmama
Ok, did you read any of my posts? MANY people have taken him home, including STUDENTS who had to LEAVE their gym class to do so! Seriously, did you just get some sense of what the thead was about and go with your own ideas?
I don't know where I wrote that the whole community is talking about it. If I said that, I gave the wrong idea. This is NOT a gossipish area. There is concern, yes. Mostly from the older kids. I already tried the "nosy neighbors could call" with her. Zero concern, and this was in a conversation we had while she was once again looking for him. AGAIN with the shoes, I NEVER said no shoes was a reason to freak out, I said it was part of the ENTIRE picture!!! As far as this being a tight community, yes it is. I think that's part of the reason a lot of neighbors are just looking out for the boy and overlooking that there may be a bigger issue here. We live between a school and a church there are NO registered sex offenders in the subdivision, but thanks for the suggestion. The past few days have been great, he's been clean, had on a shoes and coat, since it's cold here that IS important. Then tonight, he showed up around 7:30, DS was in the tub and I was nursing so my dd told him he could play tomorrow and to go home. His 5 yo sister and 11 and 14 yo brothers were at the school as his sister is participating in junior cheer camp this week in the evenings. About 40 minutes after he left, his 14 yo brother came over in a panic looking for him. He said he thought his mom's boyfriend was at their house so when the little guy came over to the school he sent him home. It was pitch black at this time of night, and had been for about 20 minutes. I grabbed my two little ones out of the tub, threw them in jammies without even putting on dipes and put them in the car to go looking. My 13 yo took a few neighbor kids and they set out to check the parks on foot. He was dressed all in black, I panicked and drove around with my brights on terrified I'd find him on the side of the road, he's hood high and it's dark, to me that's a recipe for disaster. I can't ever recall feeling that kind of pure panic. After checking the neighborhood, I drove over to the high school parking lot. My oldest dd is a cheerleader and teaching at the junior camp. The coach and a few others were out in the parking lot. They said my dd had found a little boy in the parking lot and they were already walking home. My kids walk through the grassy area behind our house so I didn't see her from the road. Supposedly mom's bf was supposed to be watching him, but he wasn't at the house. When I first started looking I stopped one of the groups of kids out looking for him where his mom was, they said work. His sister was in that group and asked me to "help her find her family", telling me her brother and her mom's boyfriend were missing. A 5 year old shouldn't have to say things like that! When I went looking for my 13 yo to tell her we'd found him, I stopped in the street where his brothers and he and his sister and several neighbor kids were walking and asked the 14 yo to have his mom call me tomorrow. He looked upset but said he would. I am just going to have a very frank conversation with her about my concern. I have already offered some resources but I am going to try again. Michigan just changed how they calculate foodstamps, including more child care payments than they used to. That may help her off set the cost of child care. I really wish she'd put him in head start and I am going to talk to her about that again. I am going to take her the applications and offer to take them in for her if she needs me to, even though I'm not really supposed to do that. If this ever happens again, I will not only call the police, but also CPS, and I will personally make sure there is a complete investigation. I can't even explain the look on his 14 yo brother's face tonight. No kid should have that much responsibility for his siblings. I do get it. I have four kids. My husband and I work opposite each other to help ease the burden on our older kids because we won't do traditional daycare and can't afford all day home care. ALL of my breastfeeding clients are low income, struggling moms and families. I really do get how hard it is. I also get that this child is not being taken care of the way he needs to be and I really don't give a damn what his mom's excuse it. There isn't a sufficent excuse for allowing your child to be put in harms way. Repeatedly wandering around alone is being put in harms way for a three or four year old. Some of the posters here may think I am being judgemental and gossiping, and that's just fine. I almost threw up when I couldn't find him tonight. I dropped an f bomb in front of my daughter's cheerleading coach without even realizing it and I went home and cried when we found him. Until you've been in a situation like this, you have no idea. There is no room for polite when a child's safety is at risk. Thank you, all of you who clearly didn't read the entire thread and jumped on some bizarre bandwagon, enough to get under my skin. You just reminded me of that. |
Even after I read you guys found him, I was still shaken up. I'm glad you found him and he was safe.Quote:
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Originally Posted by LynnS6
Wow! I'm impressed by your compassion, your concern and your working toward a resolution that is good for the kids and tries to keep them where they are. I hope your talk with the parents goes well! (Definitely bring your dh - scary looking boyfriends could be nice or could be scary!)
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Originally Posted by MSUmama
Wow has it been a bad week all the way around...
I gave the mom all the information I had an encouraged her to call Head Start. I don't think she did, one of the teachers is job shadowing me and I kind of hinted about it, she didn't know of any newly interested parents... My husband takes care of our kids from noon on and he said the little guy had been by a few times, still without shoes and now it is VERY cold. I was still perplexed about what to do, and I've been busy putting out my own fires so I never did call CPS to report her. Tonight the 11 year old came by trick or treating. My oldest dd asked where the two little one were, as the oldest is on a hunting trip and we thought we'd see them with the 11 year old. The look on his face was horrible, he went on to tell us that their dad found out that mom's boyfriend smokes pot (IMO not the worst possible offense, but I've never done that so I can't be sure) and is a convicted something. If he's a sex offender, he's violating because he can't live in this neighborhood. I'm guessing it's felon. The dad called CPS and no less than 5 (which is probably ALL of our town's) sqad cars showed up earlier this week and removed them to their dad's custody. I hate that this has happened. I'm glad they are in a better situation, if they are, I don't really know that. I just feel so bad for the two older boys and the little ones. I can't believe CPS rolls in with guns blazing like that, they must have been so scared. I'm just sick about it. That should not be standard operating procedure. Hopefully they are going to be taken better care of and hopefully the two older boys will get to spend time with them. It would be wonderful if the two dads of the four kids could get together and work it out so they could see each other daily. Wouldn't life be great if it worked like that????? |
I can only imagine how you feel having personally gone through this, when I was so upset by it and I'm just reading this. I hope things go better for *all* the children involved. It sounds like they really need a turn.
I also hope your DD's health is improving. I will be praying for all of you.
