OK to encourage PT BFing?

[TinyMama]

I don't usually post here, so please excuse me if this is a topic regularly covered here.

I have a friend who FF'ed her LO almost from the very beginning because "It was too hard" and "I couldn't pump" etc. etc. etc. I hadn't had my baby yet (she was born 7 weeks later) and couldn't speak from experience yet...and although I tried to be supportive, my friend had really already weaned by the time she told me.

She's pregnant with #2 now. She WOH FT and will be going back to work 3 mths after the baby is born. I would like to encourage her to BF, esp. since her first DD has asthma and I could use that as an example of something BF'ing would possibly guard against. But...I would also point out that she doesn't have to BF FT. I think that I have a better chance of getting her to try by saying, "You can BF FT while you're home for 3mo, then give formula during the day so you don't have to pump at work. You can wean at 6 mths or 1 yr. You can maintain a nursing relationship one x per day if that's what you're comfortable with."

None of these things are things I personally would do, and to be honest, some of them sound pretty flaky to me. But...the goal is to get her to BF, right? Or is there another way of doing this that I'm not thinking of?

ETA: I can see this situation happening with many women I know, actually, and I'm betting a lot of people could be more easily swayed to BF if it were presented this way. Do you see a contradiction in being a partial lactavist like this?

[Mrs-Mama]

Some breast milk is better than none. IMHO, you are encouraging BFing by letting her know it's ok to do it part-time. I think a lot of FFing moms don't realize that.

[krystyn33]

:

My sis gave up early because she thought it was all or nothing. Any amount of breastfeeding is better than none. But she should be aware that any supplements/artificial nipples in the first few weeks can cause problems with latch and/or supply, so it is best to do exclusive until BFing gets established.

One day at a time--one feeding at a time is a good perspective to keep sanity!

[krystyn33]

Originally Posted by TinyMama

ETA: I can see this situation happening with many women I know, actually, and I'm betting a lot of people could be more easily swayed to BF if it were presented this way. Do you see a contradiction in being a partial lactavist like this?

As for the broader issue, I think women deserve the facts, and the recommendation of exclusive BF for at least 6 months is there for a reason. So formally I don't think the message that it is OK to supplement is helpful--it only undermines breastfeeding success, and we can't pretend formula comes close to the quality of our milk. BUT in individual circumstances if a mom is really struggling and BFing is in jeopardy anyway, I would encourage some BFing over none, because even part time there are many benefits. It is a tricky position. That's why as lactivists we need to work on getting maternity leave and other things in place, so fewer moms are faced with these struggles.

[TinyMama]

Thanks for the opinions. I'm glad to hear that you all think it's okay to encourage this particular person to BF PT. And I agree, krystyn, that the correct info is important. If only working mamas got true maternity leaves that took biology into account...

[tbone_kneegrabber]

I think encouraging BF parttime is awesome. I think that more people would bf at all if they thought they could do it some of the time. I have had several friends who have bf'ed when with their babies and ff'ed when not because they did not have the kind of jobs where they could pump.

I think that having an all or nothing stand point is harmful. And any bm is better than none!

[Koloe]

Originally Posted by krystyn33

:

My sis gave up early because she thought it was all or nothing.

That's what I thought years ago. I don't recall when the "Duh!" moment hit me that you didn't have to do that. But it was before I ever go pregnant. Though as pp mentioned, it's best to start that way to establish a good supply. And of course that part time nursing can negatively impact your supply.

I think a lot of women would be more willing to give BF a real chance if they knew that. And then they may realize they didn't have to supplement after all and those who do have to supplement wouldn't feel as bad because they still nurse when the child is with them.

[Lil'M]

I think it is ok to take into account where this mom is coming from and use whatever approach will help her become interested in bf her baby. You may also want to make sure that she knows she has your support and that you can help her overcome the difficulties she had the first time.

[guestmama9920]

Originally Posted by Mrs-Mama

Some breast milk is better than none. IMHO, you are encouraging BFing by letting her know it's ok to do it part-time. I think a lot of FFing moms don't realize that.

ita

anything is better than nothing and some women nurse pt for years

[EnchantedMamma]

I would encourage. You never know- she might like it enough to BF more! (While I planned to nurse exclusively, I was not a huge fan in the beginning, but now I love my snuggling snuffling babe at the boob )

[2lilsweetfoxes]

Amazingly, even though everyone here pretty much does not like the Baby Whisperer, I remember reading in that book first about combined feeding. (Which since I WOHM is second choice to me--first being breastmilk only--natural together, bottle when I work. If pumping did not work or I don't manage to pump enough, then little bean would get formula, too.) Before that, I thought it was all or nothing, too.

[miche28]

Originally Posted by 2lilsweetfoxes

Amazingly, even though everyone here pretty much does not like the Baby Whisperer, I remember reading in that book first about combined feeding. (Which since I WOHM is second choice to me--first being breastmilk only--natural together, bottle when I work. If pumping did not work or I don't manage to pump enough, then little bean would get formula, too.) Before that, I thought it was all or nothing, too.

I'm glad that was helpful to you, but honestly, the Baby Whisperer is not a book I'd recommend for a mother who is planningon breastfeeding -t he advice is out of date and/or just plain loopy.

As for part-time breastfeeding, my stance is that every ounce of breastmilk that a baby gets is a gift. It's important that mom understands the potential risk of supplementing (esp. in the early weeks), but also to encourage a mother who is hesitant to set small goals. First, just breastfeeding in the hospital - no artificial nipples or bottles. It's just 48 hours, right? You can do that. Then, let's try a week, two weeks, three, six weeks.... By then, mom and baby are often into a rhythm and she's feeling confident.

[DreamsInDigital]

I've been known to suggest it to moms who will be returning to the workforce and say things like "Well I'm NOT going to pump at work so I might as well just give the baby a bottle from the start." I definitely think any amount of breastmilk is better than none.