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Who is still nursing? - Page 2

post #21 of 48
I thought I'd be tandem nursing, and am kind of sad I won't be. DD weaned fairly early in the pregnancy. She told me there was no more milk. She cut down to once every few days after I got pregnant, and was down to once a week at the end. She's asked to nurse twice in the past 2 or 3 months, but she was unable to actually latch. I did start leaking colostrum yesterday. I almost want to pump and save it for flu season....
post #22 of 48
DD just turned 2. We are still nursing, but rarely, sometimes going 2 days with no nursing at all. I'm actually kind of shocked, because at the beginning of the pregnancy she was still nursing to sleep and about 10+ other times a day and a few times each night. First she night-weaned, or I should say, we did it together as I NEEDED the sleep and she understood when I said the nursies were sleeping and would just cuddle up to go back to sleep. From what I can tell, it appears I lost my milk at about 3 months pregnant.

Then I started battling the worst case of thrush I've ever had. It's been almost 3 months now, but I think I have it almost licked. Unfortunately, DD doesn't like the way I taste when I've had the thrush salve on, so lately she asks for milk and then tends to stop right away and tell me its "yucky."

I'm also having some pain and nursing aversion, but when that kicks in I tell her that we can nurse until I count to 10 and she's normally pretty good about that limit. I'm mostly concerned that she's nursing so little when I still have so much of the pregnancy left - and that concern mostly stems from the fact that she has so many food sensitivities that I worry about meeting her nutritional needs from food alone. I don't, at this point, think she is likely to fully wean though, as she still seems very interested in at least talking with me about her "baby milk."
post #23 of 48
24 weeks with DD at 3.5yrs and still nursing for naps and in the early AM. Nursing aversion ("dry" nipples like there's no milk yet) happens more often now, but not all of the time.

She's nursing for shorter time lengths now and cuddling more, though, which is a nice easy transition for now.
post #24 of 48
DD is 3yo and 4 months. She mostly only nurses at night when going to sleep. I really wanted to make it through. I teetered back and forth on whether or not I wanted to tandem nurse again, but tonight I told myself, "I am done!". As soon as my milk started to deplete, she started to use her teeth while nursing. I talked to her about it, "use your big mouth" etc. etc. She said, "that's how me does it, mama...that's how me gets the milk out." So, obviously, she did it in response to my milk going, but...she won't stop no matter what I say. She does briefly, but goes right back, and now I think it's becoming habit. She is leaving me with dark purple ring of tooth marks around my nipple and I can't take it anymore. I'm done. It's excruciating. I can handle dry nursing and general pregnancy nursing creepies, but I can't take it anymore. I feel so sad that it is ending this way and on a frustrated note. Crap!
post #25 of 48
OK, update--my DS has not asked to nurse the last 3 nights for bedtime. So part of me is over the moon about it, and part of me is really sad. . .just processing those feelings. He's been on this huge books before bed kick and has been passing out before we get to "nuh nuh" He's missed one night before from time to time, but never 2 consecutive nights and certainly 3 is a shocker!

And yes, I know there are lots of things I can do to get him nursing at bedtime again if I want to keep him going, but I'm going to be honest--I'm incredibly ambivalent and conflicted about nursing right now and although I have initiated parent-led limits such as nightweaning and time limiting our day sessions, I also am not going to offer if he doesn't ask--that's just where I feel comfortable right now. I like what Flowers says in her book about not feeling like you're making a forever decision but that it's okay to just take it day to day.

Still causing me anxiety though that the last THREE days he's skipped one of his major sessions. . .it's like, be careful what you wish for. I'm a little sad for him and for me. Maybe he's just picking up on my ambivalence and not getting enough out of it (figuratively, not literally--I"ve still got milkies, ha ha)

I'm really glad you all shared your stories, especially since I am the only one I know nursing "this long" (ha) and the only one nursing + pregnant I know IRL. . .I also feel like a wimp because I feel like so many of you are more commited to nursing your little ones than I am, making it through worse situations than mine. Like I'm giving up when it's not really that bad. I even was nursed until I was 3 so I feel especially guilty that weaning is a possibility for us right now, that I'm not giving DS the gift I was given I feel like, I don't know, like I'm not as gung ho as I thought I would be. My emotions are really surprising to me.

I think it's the aversion that's killing me. DS and I had 12 weeks of thrush where I literally lost part of my nipples and constantly bled due to tissue damage when he was born--I made it through that pain, we made it through teething and endless night nursings, and I told my DH, if it was just painful, I could take it--BTDT, I think I'm pretty darn tough. If it were just dry nursing, I could handle that.

But the feelings I feel when I nurse are SO strong, and SO disturbing, that it makes something that used to be so treasured into something so crazy and agitating, that alone makes me want to cry. I grieve for my old enjoyment of nursing lost and for his babyhood right to nurse which I feel like I'm stealing from him by getting pregnant again and creating these hormones that make me want to get him off of me the second he latches on.

I don't want to feel that way while I'm doing something that used to feel so perfect and good between us. I remember when I used to get that little nursing high after let down, and even though I still have let down it doesn't do anything to release any of those good chemicals or emotions, and I have even had such strong feelings during nursing where I actually feel like if I don't make him stop RIGHT NOW I will want to throw him away from me. It's just nuts, and I haven't ever met anyone who had it. Thank goodness Flowers wrote a little tiny bit about it in her book or I would think I need psychiatric meds
post #26 of 48
EBeth,

I just wanted to say that all of those strong feelings of aversion are REALLY normal! You are more than 1/2 way through a pregnancy. Your body is nurturing your new lo as they grow, and beginning to gear up to begin BFing THAT child. While many people do push through it an continue nursing, there are just as many who chose not to, and that is ok. If your DC is beginning to self wean, maybe he IS ready to wean. Given all that you described with the thrush early on, you can hardly say you haven't sacrificed much to continue BF'ing your child, because you HAVE. Most mamas wouldn't have made it through 10 weeks of thrush. You are a loving committed mama, and your DC has benefited from that love and yummy milk for his whole life. What a gift. Don't compare duration with anyone else. Was your mom PG with another lo while nursing you? If not, don't compare. It is apples to oranges.
post #27 of 48
My DD is barely nursing these days. At least once a day, evenings normally, she will come over and ask, so I give them to her, and she sucks for about 5 secs, then wants the others, sucks for 5 secs, then gets off, says mmmm, with satisfaction, then thats it. It can't be enough stimulation to make anything. She's also been favoring her paci lately, which is unusual. So I guess she may be weaning. We too night weaned in the first tri, and it caused her to sleep through the night! Woo Hoo!
post #28 of 48
I'm still nursing a 3 year old mostly at before bed time at night, nap-time and once during the night (about 1 hour before I rise for the morning…). This is a drastic reduction from the 6-10 times in early pregnancy.

I think my milk is all gone (I'm at 23 weeks), but DS says there is still milk in there and it still tastes the same. It is very frustrating since I have to keep reminding him not to play with the other side (nipple twiddling) and to be still when he nurses. All these rules! Oh well, he still gets his mummy's milk….

Often I get the urge to just push him off in a violent manner. But I grit my teeth through the discomfort, check his positioning and put up with it. After a few minutes the feeling passes and I'm able to fall asleep.

Michele
post #29 of 48
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cutie Patootie View Post
DD is 3yo and 4 months. She mostly only nurses at night when going to sleep. I really wanted to make it through. I teetered back and forth on whether or not I wanted to tandem nurse again, but tonight I told myself, "I am done!". As soon as my milk started to deplete, she started to use her teeth while nursing. I talked to her about it, "use your big mouth" etc. etc. She said, "that's how me does it, mama...that's how me gets the milk out." So, obviously, she did it in response to my milk going, but...she won't stop no matter what I say. She does briefly, but goes right back, and now I think it's becoming habit. She is leaving me with dark purple ring of tooth marks around my nipple and I can't take it anymore. I'm done. It's excruciating. I can handle dry nursing and general pregnancy nursing creepies, but I can't take it anymore. I feel so sad that it is ending this way and on a frustrated note. Crap!
: DD nursed to sleep tonight and did not clench her teeth. I have decided to get everyone falling asleep on their own, so I am not nursing her with the lights off etc. They don't care at all, and nursing tonight was so lovely. I laid in bed with her and nursed with the lights on. She fell off to sleep so peacefully while nursing and when she was just barely asleep, I kissed her goodnight and left the room. I am ecstatic that it didn't end on that awful last night the night before last.
post #30 of 48
Thread Starter 
wow. when i started this thread i did not think there would be so many of us in the same shoes. so many of us that are kind of ambivalent about weaning too!

if it weren't for the elimination diet i think i could handle our two-times-a-day nursing regimen. i have been eating a lot of dairy lately though (which i didn't do for over a year, even when we lived in france for three months and i'm a cheese addict) and i know it can't be good for ds. his stools are very runny and stinky and he seems itchier than usual (though he's often itchy). perhaps it is the colostrum that is making it runnier, but would that really happen with nursing only 20 minutes total in a day? i do know that i still have a lot of milk though.

and today when i put DS down for his nap i said "do you think nigh-nighs are making your tummy hurt?" and he said "no, make feel better". that made me smile, even though i don't think it's really true -- for instance, he also told me that "nigh-nighs taste yummy like cow's milk" which he hasn't had since an allergic reaction at seven months to yogurt.
post #31 of 48
I'm still nursing my son. He was down to 2 - 3 times a day, but has recently jumped it up to every hour or so. I can't tell if he's getting anything....I suspect not much because he flips between sides while nursing. My nipple pain with latch has just come back too...maybe because of the increased nursing frequency??
post #32 of 48
Quote:
Originally Posted by MicheleVet View Post
My nipple pain with latch has just come back too...maybe because of the increased nursing frequency??
Have you tried "Open wide" when latching? I find that helps a little.
post #33 of 48
I do tell him...but I only remember to after he's already latched badly once. Must try to remember each time....of course, my nipples are now sore all the time too instead of just at the latch....but latch is worse.
post #34 of 48
Quote:
Originally Posted by MicheleVet View Post
I do tell him...but I only remember to after he's already latched badly once. Must try to remember each time....of course, my nipples are now sore all the time too instead of just at the latch....but latch is worse.
I know exactly what you're saying. I have a very wiggly poxy toddler in my arms (making it hard to type--whew, she climbed down!) trying to convince me to nurse when I keep telling her "no numma right now, numma ow." I feel bad for it, but she lets me know when it's not okay and I have to grit and bear it.
post #35 of 48
Sadly I had to stop nursing ds last month, I have cervical issues and when he would nurse I was started to contract. I think I miss it more than ds.
post #36 of 48
EBeth, I could have written your post about how you feel about nursing lately. It drives me absolutely insane, and even though I thought I would be a tandem nursing mama, I think it's just not in the cards for me and I am really torn up about it. I want DS to wean so badly, but at the same time I don't really want to give up our nursing relationship. I just didn't want it to end this way, but I feel like I have to stop nursing him now because I resent it so much. I just don't know how to even go about weaning because I was planning on doing CLW. The scary thing for me is that right now I am dreading nursing the new baby because of the way nursing DS makes me feel and I want to be excited about nursing my baby! Luckily, DS is down to nursing about 3 times a day, but he is pretty attached to those three times so they might be difficult to get him to give up. I just don't know what to do, but I'm so glad to hear that other mamas out there feel the same way I do!
post #37 of 48

Vent

I so want to be done nursing. My nipples are sooooo dang on sore. My son has critter teeth like my DH: Sometimes I just scream in frustration and you know what DS does? He gives me this huge smile.

There is no way that I can stop nursing him. He is Not having that. The cuddling is not working, he just continues to cry. In fact I'm trying to think about what he'll be like when I go into the hospital for 3 or 4 days. I honestly think he'll be there the entire visiting hours wanting to suck me to death.
post #38 of 48
I've hit a new sore stage and even distractions are hard to find to keep me from wanting to run away! It doesn't help that she's started letting her mouth relax enough that I'm feeling teeth--what the heck? Where did this laziness come from? I have to stop her and she's started arguing about coming off, so I have to pry her off with a finger. I know she's sick, but MAN!

I really hope this gets better once the baby's here.
post #39 of 48
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jannah5 View Post
In fact I'm trying to think about what he'll be like when I go into the hospital for 3 or 4 days. I honestly think he'll be there the entire visiting hours wanting to suck me to death.
I'm wondering about this too. Any BTDT mammas?

My guy will probably be fine with other people putting him down to sleep/nap and not notice that he's not nursing since it'll be someone else. But I'm a little anxious about the possibility of him not nursing for several days and then wanting it again and forgetting how to latch and being jealous of the new baby nursing so much more often than him and him associating the new baby with inability to nurse for several days and so much more....

Ack!!
post #40 of 48
When I was in the hospital after having DS2 my DH bought DD1 to visit. When I tried to nurse her she bit me, I think out of jealousy. I can't remember what happened the next day or if I even tried to nurse her. DD1 wasn't an attached nurser like DS3 is, so I am really anxious to see what I'm in store for.
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