Easing 2-year-old into life with new baby

[Lula'sMamala]

Hello mammas -

I am expecting DD2 in three weeks and wonder what approaches worked for you in making the arrival of baby #2 a little easier for #1.

DD1 is a very bright, extremely verbal 26 months. She is very excited about the arrival of "little sister" but I worry about how she'll take it when it actually happens as she is totally mommy-centric and I fear will feel abandoned because of the demands the new one will place on me. For example:

If I'm in the house, she won't go to sleep for anyone else; I have to lie down next to her and she cuddles up close to me and puts her arms around my neck, sits straight up and says "where are you going?" if I try to move before she's sound asleep.

She wants me to push the buggy when we're out walking with Daddy, wants to sit on my lap to eat dinner, etc. etc.

We are still breastfeeding once or twice a day and generally co-sleep from about half-way through the night.

I would like to change some of these things anyway, but she is so happy and wonderful that I feel we must be doing plenty of things right! ; )

Thanks all of you for your advice!

Tracy

[tinahiggins]

I have a just two, and a 7 month old. there was a whole lot of "mommie loves you, but your brother needs me right now. We will have one-on-one time when he goes to sleep. i love you" and then ignoring the ensuing tantrum, and making sure she did get alone time with mom later.
they do find a balance. I spent a lot of time feeling like I was rejecting the older child, which I realized wasn't ture, I was just used to her being my universe.
The eating while sitting in your lap thing needs to be addressed, though. It is going to cause serious problems when you have to nurse your way though dinner.

[heidirk]

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[kayleesmom]

taking notes as well as my 16 month old is very attached to me to pt where i cant even leave her sight. she wil be 21 months when baby 3 comes along

[lovetobemama]

My DS was 27 mos when DD was born, and, though I was worried, he did perfectly!
Some things that helped:
-I wore DD in a Moby wrap a TON. Then I could play with DS and still feel like I was holding and giving good attachment to DD.
-Have a basket of "special" nursing time toys. He had some special toys that he could use when I had to nurse DD.
-Get her involved if she is interested. DS loved getting the diaper each time DD needed to be changed, and seemed to feel like it was "our" job, not "my" job.
-Talk over the next few weeks about what a baby needs: milk with mama, sleep and cuddles. I talked about these 3 things ALL THE TIME with DS whenever the baby was brought up in conversation, and really tried to prepare him for what the baby would be like.
-Keep the pressure off! I didn't ask DS to kiss/hold/love/anything to the baby at all! We just sort of left everything up to DS. He started checking her out on his own terms, and I think it helped him.

These are just off the top of my head. Hope they are helpful ideas. I'm sure it will go well!

-Oh, one last one, when DD was sleeping, I made sure to (if I had the energy) give DS VERY good one-on-one time. Then I knew he had gotten some focused play time, even if other times he had to deal with me tending to DD.