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The OCTOBER Infertility ONE Thread! - Page 3

post #41 of 255
10/9/08 at 7:19pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by crystal-mommy View Post

This month has been really hard... I have had meltdowns for the last week over practically everything. Can't really say anything to DH either cause he is kinda fed up w/ the whole thing.
I understand. My DH is supportive, I suppose. But it really bothers me when he can't even ask how the RE visit went- and I've been going several times a week. He could ASK and pretend to be interested : If I'm upset, grumpy, frustrated, etc. and he actually notices and asks "why" he just says "oh, that" if I mention infertility.

One of my best friends just had her baby on Saturday- a wonderful homebirth VBAC. I am absolutely thrilled for her, but had to fight the tears and emotions when I dropped off a meal for her this evening. The baby was so beautiful, peaceful, wonderful- in her arms and not mine. It's just so difficult

I am 8 DPO and hoping against hope this is my month. I've been crampy the entire time though, with a bit of spotting, more mucous today. I know AF is on her way. . . but still I hope.

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post #42 of 255
10/9/08 at 9:27pm
Hello friends.

I am still on my break but I wanted you all to know that you are in my prayers. IF is so hard and at times it can be so draining on one's emotions and even upon our marriages. Don't forget girls no matter how our hubbies respond they do show and share their emotions so much differently than we do.

Be gentle to yourselves and may none of you be here when I return

Blessings and love.
post #43 of 255
10/9/08 at 9:43pm
Held....you are sooo sweet
post #44 of 255
10/9/08 at 11:29pm
Thread Starter 
I found myself in sort of a weird situation. I don't like talking to dh about how I feel for a number of reasons... it's so repetitive, so it's the same thing month after month. I know he's feeling down about it too and tries just not to think about it, and I don't want to be the one bringing it up all the time and making him feel bad too. And most of all, I don't want him to worry about me. He can't fix it and he knows it.

So I've been talking to other people instead. There's a cousin that I'm talking to, and a few male coworkers who are also friends that I trust. I told dh who I was confiding in, and he was really weirded out that I was talking to these other people about it. I think he felt mildly threatened, but not so much so that he was willing to stop me from talking to who I wanted.

But the wife of one of the coworkers I was talking to apparently had an insecure day, and decided that she was too uncomfortable with these conversations to let them continue. It's true that it's probably weird to confide in other men (although I always told dh about the conversations and there was no hiding or anything... we didn't even always just talk about IF, but he was one of the people I felt I could bring it up with. and I told him it was fine to tell his wife about it, too - I didn't want to cause problems in their marriage!)

So now we just talk on e-mail. It's fine, he wasn't the only person I was talking to. But it just highlights how complicated relationships can be.

All this to say, I understand about dh's not being entirely empathetic or supportive! I think there is NOTHING wrong in getting emotional needs met outside the marriage. You can't have everything in one person, and I think it's unrealistic to expect that you can.
post #45 of 255
10/10/08 at 12:17pm
Crystal Mommy - hang in there, you are in my thoughts and prayers!

Songbird - I think that sucks that the fact that you discussed this with him was enough for his wife to put a wedge in your friendship. I also have a male friend, that I met through work although he doesn't work for my company, that has been through IF and IVF, and are getting ready to go through it again for number 2. DH knows that I talk to him, and I know that it helps me to get the male perspective from someone that doesn't have the heavy weight of going through it with ME. (or even going through it at all!)
post #46 of 255
10/10/08 at 3:05pm
Looks like our 2ww is over. I got a bfn today. Beta was 2, so I should be getting af monday or so.
What a crushing feeling!
post #47 of 255
10/10/08 at 4:02pm
Meadowmom: Damnit! I'm sorry. Any thoughts about what to do differently for next cycle?
post #48 of 255
10/10/08 at 4:24pm

Talk me down

I had my RE visit this morning. 9 DPO. I've had some spotting this cycle, some cramping, and I feel that AF is ready to rear her ugly head.

BUT. . . my RE called me back and said I'm pregnant! We conceived!! I have a very faintly positive blood test apparently. My lining was nice and thick on the u/s as well.

I'm not feeling it though. I think I'm not ready to deal with the emotions when AF *does* show. We've never tracked an entire cycle before so for all I know, this has happened every month for the past year or more.

I want to : but I can't go there yet. . . .
post #49 of 255
10/10/08 at 4:25pm
MeadowMom
post #50 of 255
10/10/08 at 4:40pm
Thread Starter 
MeadowMom It sucks and it's not fair.

Voltige - I wouldn't be able to get my hopes up either. Totally impossible, I know, but try to put it out of your mind for a day or two until you can get that doubling beta number. Is there something that you can do to keep busy today? See a movie or cook or something?
post #51 of 255
10/10/08 at 5:50pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by gumby74 View Post
Meadowmom: Damnit! I'm sorry. Any thoughts about what to do differently for next cycle?
Thanks, I was pretty bummed at first, but dealing.


No Gumby, same thing just next month. My NP said other then OHSS I responded perfectly. Oct is when we conceived our ds, so who knows it might just be our month! For tonight I am eating pizza, cheesecake, and wine nothing better to lift spirits.
Let me know how your appt goes next week.
post #52 of 255
10/10/08 at 6:24pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Voltige View Post
I had my RE visit this morning. 9 DPO. I've had some spotting this cycle, some cramping, and I feel that AF is ready to rear her ugly head.

BUT. . . my RE called me back and said I'm pregnant! We conceived!! I have a very faintly positive blood test apparently. My lining was nice and thick on the u/s as well.

I'm not feeling it though. I think I'm not ready to deal with the emotions when AF *does* show. We've never tracked an entire cycle before so for all I know, this has happened every month for the past year or more.

I want to : but I can't go there yet. . . .
Keeping my fingers crossed for you!!! I hope you get some nice and high numbers in 2 days!!!

AAM I took a test yesterday... against my better judgement... bfn! surprise surprise!! I had a mini meltdown on my way to work and felt much better. Trying not to stress myself out or get all bummed, but have been really crabby and short tempered. Af should be here in 2-3 days and I get to start the madness all over again.

Song do you always have the u/s w/ the femara? I am so tired of all that... will you dr let you do a femara cycle and not be monitored w/ u/s?
post #53 of 255
10/10/08 at 6:32pm
Voltiege: I'm hoping your numbers keep going up,up, up!!!!!

Meadowmom: Oct is when my DS was conceived. In fact my two miscarriages were conceived in October. It must be my month as well...or at least I hope!
post #54 of 255
10/10/08 at 7:00pm
Crystal - Hopefully it is still early and you won't get AF!!! Fingers crossed for you!!!

MeadowMom - so sorry to hear about you BFN!! Enjoy your dinner tonight!! Sound good to me!

Voltige - congrats to you!! I know it is hard to get too excited, but i will continue to keep my fingers crossed for you!!! Keep us posted.

So here is a question for you ladies... hopefully i won't even have to go there, but i always think about what is next to come if we don't get our BFP this time. So i think if this IUI doesn't work I have to see my RE and I have a feeling it will be injections next. So my question is... if clomid is actually working for me (meaning we are getting the follicles and all), but we aren't getting prego then why would injections be any different. What do they do that is so different than clomid and why would they help us to get prego if clomid is doing what it is suppose to technically, but not getting us prego?? Anyone know the answer to that?????
post #55 of 255
10/10/08 at 7:57pm
Thread Starter 
good question, and one I'm going to ask my RE as well. My best guess is that there are more follicles, and therefore more targets. It looks like we're in the same boat - doing drugs/IUI and looking at injectible FSH as the next step.
post #56 of 255
10/10/08 at 8:27pm
Wow- What a day on the thread!

Meadowmom- Sorry, Please enjoy your dinner and gear up for next month. We are here for you

Voltige- We will keep cautiously optimistic for you

Blue- The only thoughts I have about injectibles vs. clomid is the injectibles will not alter your lining like clomid or letrazole.

First FSH injection today. One co-worker held me and the other gave me the shot! (I am an RN) Anyhow, kudos to the strong women who give themselves injections!!
post #57 of 255
10/10/08 at 10:37pm
Hey everyone...........boy, it's been a busy week for everyone!!
: to Voltige......I am thinking positive thoughts for you, and to everyone else.

AFM, I have been quietly doing my third round of clomid, and just started OPK today, CD9. My RE says if I don't see a surge by Monday, to come in for an u/s. DH and I are going to Santa Fe this weekend for our third anniversary, and we are hoping that we will "get lucky".

I have been feeling really icky this round of clomid. Has anyone else experienced extreme fatigue and stomach pain? I've also had a pretty good headache for about three days now. I'm not sure if it's the clomid, or maybe I just caught a bug............

I'll keep you posted after the weekend. Have a nice long weekend, those of you who get one!!
post #58 of 255
10/10/08 at 11:15pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by crystal-mommy View Post
Song do you always have the u/s w/ the femara? I am so tired of all that... will you dr let you do a femara cycle and not be monitored w/ u/s?
I totally missed this before, sorry. And sorry about the bfn.

I don't O until CD 17 or 18 so I have an u/s around day 15 and they see where I'm at. My OPK's are sometimes reliable and sometimes I miss the surge, so it's good to have the u/s and bloodwork to make sure we time the IUI right. If we were just bd'ing I wouldn't have to be monitored with u/s.
post #59 of 255
10/11/08 at 12:01am
Quote:
Originally Posted by blueyezz4 View Post

So here is a question for you ladies... hopefully i won't even have to go there, but i always think about what is next to come if we don't get our BFP this time. So i think if this IUI doesn't work I have to see my RE and I have a feeling it will be injections next. So my question is... if clomid is actually working for me (meaning we are getting the follicles and all), but we aren't getting prego then why would injections be any different. What do they do that is so different than clomid and why would they help us to get prego if clomid is doing what it is suppose to technically, but not getting us prego?? Anyone know the answer to that?????

Because the injections will make you release your eggs. Clomid and the like will help you make good eggs, but you might not be releasing them, or possibly not when you think you are. So with the injections you will know when you release them. HTH
post #60 of 255
10/11/08 at 12:58am
Injections can also help build up the endometrium and give the embryo a nice comfy home
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