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Originally Posted by MiriamF  Well, like I stated in my initial post, my daughter could entertain herself with two sticks if necessary. She never has a problem when she is feeling safe and secure. She can do anything. My issue is really more of: the baby room doesn't do a very good job helping her feel safe and happy, they're too busy with babies, etc - and the older room is MUCH more age appropriate for her - and while she doesn't NEED the more complex jigsaw puzzles, books, older kid's toys, etc - it would certainly help her. Furthermore, being around kids who are older and who can talk on her level would also help her feel more settled.
I have only gone five times in two weeks. So it hasn't been that often, but that's because I feel so bad. She truly doesn't like it and they don't seem to be all that fun and exciting to her so I really felt so much guilt taking her even that much.
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If the issue is that your DD isn't getting enough personal attention to settle in because the staff are busy with the babies, I'm not sure that the preschool room would solve your problem.
I can see how in a baby and toddler room, where a 2.5 year old would be on the mature end of the scale, the staff might expect your DD to be more independent and focus more of their efforts on the babies. However, in the preschool room they are allowed more children per staff member. Sometimes the older kids are very demanding, active and boisterous, and any younger or quieter kids who are content to sit and not make noise or trouble are just left alone.
The quality of the childcare is probably about the same in both rooms. You need to set aside your guilt and the idea that the grass is greener on the other side of the childcare facility. Focus on this as a separation issue not a gym policy issue. Your DD sounds very tenacious and bright. If she's protesting this, I don't think the protest is going to magically end because baby room has bristle blocks and the preschool room has Lego blocks and paint.
Maybe you could talk to the teachers and find out the days and times when they are the least busy in the baby and toddler room and see if that helps your DD to get more special attention to draw her out. Have you talked to the staff person who is there at drop off to let them know that your DD is struggling with this, what kind of child she normally is, and what tactics are most likely to help her warm up? By all means ask about bringing toys over from the other room, but you can also suggest songs, favourites topics of discussion or toys in the baby room that are likely to engage her.
What about the moms that you talked to who also have kids approaching three? Could you help your DD get to know their kids and try to plan your gym time when other 2.5+ year olds will be there? If these moms go to regular classes maybe you could try and go at the same times. It doesn't need to be a long term plan to execute. Just let them know that your DD would enjoy seeing some familiar faces while she's there. See if they have a bit of a schedule going for the classes they attend, and ask if they'd mind you introducing your DD to their kids.
Would it help if you got there early, stayed with your DD for fifteen minutes and introduced her to the other kids, or the other 2+ kids anyway, as they were dropped off? Would it help if you visited the childcare area together for some playtime without you leaving her to go and workout?
Do you know the name of that one teacher your DD connected with? Could you find out from the gym when she works? Do they have a schedule of who works when so you can prepare your DD for who to expect, even if it only meant that she knew the person's name in advance?
I agree with Kerc, 5 visits over too weeks is not a lot. It's way too early to feel discouraged about this, especially since your DD is only 2.5 and never been dropped off at something like this. When our oldest started preschool the teachers expected the whole first month to be an acclamation period for a lot of kids. I bet you'll see a difference going four days in a row.
