I screwed up at work... hugs please?

[texmati]

I just feel crushed when I do badly at work... i"m being called into my bosses office.... again.

I didn't even realize that i was doing anything wrong when it happened... I just feel like crap. How do you guys handle it? How do you not take it personally?

[babydanielsmom]

Just wanted to send out a to you.

[rcr]

oh, I am sorry, I take everything personally too.

[Dena]

I hate screwing up too. I try to remind myself I am human and it happens. I haven't figured out how not to take it personally, but I do try to learn from my mistakes.

I had a boss once who, when I would make a mistake, I would apologize profusely and she would just say, "oh, its ok, everyone does this at least once. But I know you, Dena, and you won't make that mistake again." I try to run that tape in my head whenever I screw up. It helps.

[Love_My_Bubba]

I'm so sorry you're going through this, I had a boss that was particularly hard on me a few years ago and it's so tough to take criticism when you didn't even know you were doing something incorrectly.

Keep your head up, your MDC mommas love you

[kirstenb]

I hate when that happens to me, because I also take things personally. I just remind myself that everyone makes mistakes, and as long as I learn from them they are not always a bad thing!

[texmati]

Thanks you guys!!! I keep trying to tell myself-- "no one cares how bad you feel, they just care how fast you fix it". I'm trying (and failing) to not feel bad, and concentrate my energy on fixing it.

I had a boss once who, when I would make a mistake, I would apologize profusely and she would just say, "oh, its ok, everyone does this at least once. But I know you, Dena, and you won't make that mistake again." I try to run that tape in my head whenever I screw up. It helps.

it makes it worse that this is the second time I've made this mistake-- indirectly conveying something to the customer, and causing screw ups everywhere.

[~pi]

[texmati]

I was just looking through my past threads... and I don't know if anyone wants an update...

It turns out my boss wasn't upset with me at all. He told me repeatedly that I hadn't done anything wrong... I went through the whole process with him again just to make sure I understood everything correctly. It was a huge load off of my mind...

Thanks so much for the hugs and kind responses. I'm going to pull this thread up whenever I'm stressed at work.

[RufusBeans]

That's great it turned out ok! :

[rivkah]

I am sorry.

I spent the first year of work trying to develop thick skin. Then I decided that I don't want thick skin. I want to be a sensitive person. It just stinks when you get criticized.

If it helps, I screw up ALL the time. Some days I am amazed I don't get fired.

I always remember what a co-worker's husband told her the first time she was "yelled at." It is very simple, but very true: IT'S JUST A JOB. Your boss's opinions have no bearing on your relationship with those people who really matter in your life.:

[texmati]

Just rereading this thread -- I'm in the same spot again. I'm pregnant, and just slow... I've started asking for approval before doing almost anything which slows me down more. I have no idea why these people keep me on some days.

Reading in this forum, everyone sounds like a superstar at what they do. Maybe you have to be to keep it together as a working mom. I just don't have what it takes.

[Qestia]

I think we all feel that way from time to time... maybe it doesn't come out on the forums because if other people are like me they don't want to broadcast it and just hope it goes away. I have dropped the ball on some things here too and am just hoping I can fake it enough for the next month--when things will ease up--for people to not notice. I'm lucky I'm in a pretty independent role... but I don't know. Try to keep perspective. Make a list of the things you've done well. Write up some ideas for preventing future mistakes. If you tell us the specifics maybe we can help.

[Labbemama]

Texmati- (Hugs)
We all have those days. All you can do is take responsibility for what you did and try your best to fix it. Everyone gets a crank customer now and then too. In my business there are an awful lot of them. It's ok to tell people you have to check with your boss and get back to them, and after awhile you'll be reassured that your judgement was right on with company policy and feel confident again. I have a job that a lot of times what I think *should* happen doesn't and ppl want answers right now. I totally sympathize... Sometimes I feel like I'm constantly calling my boss and then I feel dumb for checking because *I knew that* and sometimes policies change and I didnt' get the memo.

Also you've gone away to have a baby and come back. It takes some time to get back in the groove.

How long til maternity leave?

[madskye]

Everyone makes mistakes.

DH and I were watching the news over the weekend and we saw a piece on the University of San Diego (I think) which sent out 27,000 online acceptance letters to applicants they had actually rejected. We were both like "OOH! Yikes!" and were joking that we both could totally have done that back in the day.

You make mistakes, you fix it, you do your best to not repeat the same mistakes.

[jempd]

I made a dreadful mistake and I felt terrible (in my job I'm supposed to catch the mistakes and if I miss anything it winds up published, very permanent). What made me feel better was to immediately go to the editor's office and own up to it completely and convey my apology as sincerely as I felt it (and I really did), and not pass the buck or make any excuses. The editor expressed what the mistake cost--not financially, although it will cost quite a bit in reprints, but how upset the author was, and so forth, but she saw how sincere I was and how genuinely contrite and she did say "your work is usually so good and I know this rarely happens", and graciously accepted my apology. Then I thought about a way to make it harder for it to happen again (make myself do that extra check) and then I moved on. I feel strongly that excusing yourself somehow does not help you get over these things. Acknowledge to yourself and others that you messed up, apologize in a meaningful way, and move on: That's my formula.

[texmati]

Thanks you guys! I do try and own up to my mistakes-- although no one else seems to in this office, so I feel like I'm going out of my way to make myself look bad.

I never seem to make the big mistakes-- just copy and paste errors, real stupid stuff. I know i'm not very detail oriented, and I've been trying to double check stuff-- there's just no defending it. And I"m shocked every time it happens.

[texmati]

back here again... uploaded the wrong document somplace... making me look like an idiot. *sigh*

[rivkah]

I screw up something every day--seriously. I just try to have a sense of humor about it.

To my credit, my job is freakin' hard. However, I either take really long to finish a project, or miss an important pint I should have considered, or make a typo, or fail to e-mail someone on time, or blah, blah, blah....

What I have come to realize it that almost everyone screws up a lot--even those who appear perfect. I can't tell you the number of typos I have found in my bosses' work, when I am constantly getting scolded for proofreading mistakes.

[blizzard_babe]

I can't count the number of times I've messed up this year .

I work in a weird position where I basically have to tell people who are above me on the "ladder" what to do. I'm just a teacher, and they're principals, but I'm the district's curriculum specialist in an area (English as a Second Language) with a lot of state/federal requirements. As a result, I have to send e-mails "asking" them to do things. I can't TELL them they have to do it, but... they have to do it, and I'm the one who knows what needs to be done, and when, and how. It leads to awkward moments, and requires a certain degree of finesse that doesn't necessarily come easily to me. Basically, I have to cc THEIR boss (who is also kind of my boss, more like my boss's boss, but I report directly to him on some stuff because it's not really my boss's area) on everything, just so they know that it's "for real" .

Suffice it to say that more than once, I've been TOO direct, or not direct enough, or a principal has been unhappy or annoyed with me... but whaddaya gonna do? Luckily their boss/my kinda-boss is cool and supportive and knows I'm on a learning curve.