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Thanks Mom (vent)

post #1 of 12
Thread Starter 
OK, first let me just say that I'm done being pregnant. I'm tired; I'm sore; I'm uncomfortable; I'm done. Last night was particularly rough...I couldn't get to sleep because I couldn't find a comfortable position for more than 5-10 minutes at a time. I moved around all over the house trying to get comfortable. I got a few hours sleep in 30-45 minute increments. Needless to say, I'm not in a very good mood this morning. DS always goes over to my parents' on Saturdays so off we went. We got there and Mom asked how I was doing. I told her that I was feeling pretty miserable...she smiled : Whatever...I ignored it. She offered to fix me a cup of decaf coffee so I stayed for a while. I started venting about not getting enough sleep and being so tired and she started LAUGHING : : : So, me (being hormonal and nearly 38 weeks pregnant), I start to . Then, she asks me what's wrong. I told her "Everything and now she's laughing at me." Well, she gets all defensive saying that she was just trying to make me laugh. Well, ha ha...forgive me if I'm not in the mood to laugh at my misery at the moment. I stayed for a few more minutes and then left. I mean, she's been pregnant before (I was born 17 days past my due date). All she had to say was that she knew I was miserable and that it wouldn't be long now. But, no, she chose to laugh instead.

Now I'm home (still uncomfortable) wishing I could rest or at least soak in the bathtub (but ours sucks for taking baths). I want to go into labor. I want to not be pregnant. I want to hold my baby in my arms. I don't even care that I'm having a c/s at this point; I just want her out.

Thanks for listening.
post #2 of 12
Passes the pot of pregnancy tea...

Hugs momma!

Any chance of being able to get a prenatal massage? I still need to schedule mine, but it sounds like that might help you unwind a bit. They are every bit as good as that hot bath imo.
post #3 of 12
I'm only 34 weeks, but there are times I feel so overwhelmed, too. The end of pregnancy is hard.
post #4 of 12
Hey, I'm 38 weeks tomorrow, and I feel ya completely hon! I would be really upset if I got that reaction too. Just take some time for you and try not to dwell on the negative. Drink a cup of tea and relax, burn some incense or something. If you have the ability to get a prenatal massage, I say go for it. I have a friend who goes regularly and she absolutely swears by it.
post #5 of 12
I'm so sorry you had a rough night! I know how you feel about the c-sec.....I have been so miserable that I am relieved that the doctor has moved the scheduled date.
post #6 of 12
post #7 of 12
Thread Starter 
Originally Posted by slinginhipmama View Post
I know how you feel about the c-sec.....I have been so miserable that I am relieved that the doctor has moved the scheduled date.
I'd pay good money to have my date moved up :
post #8 of 12
Im sorry your Mom wasn't more sympathetic! Its never ok to laugh at a pregnant womans discomforts. (or anyone elses for that matter)
post #9 of 12
My DH did this to me the other night, he started laughing b/c I was so upset about a lasagna I was attempting not working out. Luckily after I lashed out at him he told me just to throw the lasagna away (I didn't even cook it yet and it wasn't going to work) and he went out and got us dinner. I'm not even uncomfortable yet, but emotionally I was a wreck and people finding humor in it does not help. Hugs to you!
post #10 of 12

I"m so sorry. I know just how you feel. I seriously think it's all part of our culture not honoring and respecting women's fertility and ability to grow a baby and give birth. It's miraculous and powerful and mystical. But it's so rarely treated that way...instead, it's turned into a big joke. Look at how many sitcom plots center around childbirth- haha, she's screaming for an epidural, hee, now she's yelling at her husband! Everything focuses on pregnant women being huge and awkward and volatile, and how funny that apparently is. Well, it can be funny, but it's also incredibly intense and important and just a very heavy time in a person's life.

I'm big on having a sense of humor, but I *hate* being laughed at when I'm upset or feeling vulnerable. I think it's so mean when people see a pregnant woman get emotional, and instead of their heart just going out to her, they laugh. It isn't right!

Anyway, I'm sorry you're feeling so miserable, and I hope you get some comfort and relief soon.
post #11 of 12
My mom is not one to give any sympathy, so I totally understand how you felt in that moment. I must have never gotten it as a child because I STILL tell her things looking for her understanding, yet mostly get told that I'm doing things wrong or that every other person in my situation has been fine and survived without complaining nearly as much as me. It's been a frustrating relationship.
I hope the laughing was just a one time thing for her and that she gives you understanding more often than not.
Hang in there--just a few more weeks!
post #12 of 12
Mrs-Mama! Your mother was very wrong to laugh at your pain and I do hope she realizes it and will apologize. There's nothing worse than being laughed at when we're seeking comfort.

My mother and I don't get along whatsoever and her generally negative, selfish attitude and ability to make everything about her have kept me from talking to her more than was strictly necessary for the duration of this pregnancy. She and my father are coming to visit a few weeks after my EDD and I'm already dreading it.

Hang in there, mama. For what it's worth, I'm 38 weeks tomorrow and so ready to have this baby I almost can't stand it any longer. Knowing that it could be four more weeks is making me feel a bit crazy and emotional.
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