Originally Posted by Citykid
I thought diaphragms were a hormonal method? Or are they one of the methods you have to put in hours before sex and then leave them in for hours afterward? I won't do hormonal methods anymore either. DH and I have been successfully using condoms for a long time. I would like not to use birth control anymore. But although we had always agreed on two kids, now I find myself so pulled to go for a third. But I'm in my mid-30s so if we have a third I won't want to wait at all. So I think we'll use condoms for the first few months until we're ready to decide, and then either just stop using birth control altogether or do a vasectomy.
They're not hormonal. They are a barrier method like condoms that blocks the cervical opening so sperm can't get up in there. You insert the diaphragm prior to intercourse, and leave it in place for a set number of hours afterward. Once it's in, it's undetectable to either partner, so for us, that's better than a condom. ETA: The key is leaving it in afterward, to block sperm. Having it in ahead of time is just for convenience so you don't have to be interrupted in the moment.
You can also use spermicide with diaphragms (just like some condoms have spermicide), to help kill off sperm as well. But the main purpose is blockage. The spermicide is a bonus.
A note on using FAM while breastfeeding, there's a section in the TCoYF book about this, but for me, it's impossible to chart my temps especially early on after birth, because I so rarely get consistent 3+ hours of sleep at a time. So we use barrier methods until my fertility signs become evident, because last time I didn't get my period back until 16 months post-partum. But it was even longer that I was getting 3+ hours consecutive sleep, consistently at the same times, since we coslept well beyond 16 months.
FAM is great and natural, and very empowering, I think. But it can be a difficult fit especially post-partum for some mamas. I'd hate to see anyone feel bad for not being able to stick to it post-partum. You gotta do whatever works for you.
I'll be 40 soon and once this baby's born that's it. We're done for good.
So a vasectomy seems a good option, but I admit we've not researched it at all yet.
, the fee varies and depends on how extensive the services are. Some doulas meet with you once prior to labor. Some are available throughout the pregnancy. Some specialize in post-partum help, and some charge less if labor is shorter, etc.
Ours is $400 for three pre-birth in home visits, unlimited labor/birth time, and one post-partum visit. She's open to barter, so we're bartering for half her fee with web services.