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"Cover"-ed Girls! - Page 51

post #1001 of 1083

A lot of information about modest dressing and headcovering focus on very feminine dress. I was wondering if anyone had any suggestions for headcovering for tomboys that isn't a bandana? On me, I think bandanas look kind of trashy, and I'd like something that covered all of my (short) hair.

post #1002 of 1083
Quote:
Originally Posted by revolting View Post

A lot of information about modest dressing and headcovering focus on very feminine dress. I was wondering if anyone had any suggestions for headcovering for tomboys that isn't a bandana? On me, I think bandanas look kind of trashy, and I'd like something that covered all of my (short) hair.



Have you looked at the garlands of grace and cover your hair sites? They have nice selections of different kinds of coverings.

post #1003 of 1083

Thanks Kangamitroo. I am surprised by the number of people who do cover or who think it's cool to cover, religious reasons or not. So my boss my surprise me and be ok with it. I guess I'll find out in two weeks, lol. I hope everything went smoothly with your students.

post #1004 of 1083
Quote:
Originally Posted by revolting View Post

A lot of information about modest dressing and headcovering focus on very feminine dress. I was wondering if anyone had any suggestions for headcovering for tomboys that isn't a bandana? On me, I think bandanas look kind of trashy, and I'd like something that covered all of my (short) hair.



How about a soft bucket hat, with the front brim pushed up so it doesn't cover your face?

post #1005 of 1083

Hi all.  I just read two pages of this thread so far ( out of 58?!) and plan to keep on reading because it's great!  I had thought I'd ask a question about why people cover but all I have to do is read.  I thought I'd say a bit of my story and also ask a quesiton (that may be answered in my later reading)

-How do you tie your scarves and keep them from falling off, for those of you who wear your bangs showing?
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruthla View Post

I can't speak for Christians, but the traditional Jewish idea is to cover all of the hair, not just "have something covering the head." Of course, there are Jewish women in various stages of observance- I've seen Jewish women with baseball caps and a ponytail sticking out the back, Jewish women wearing hats with long hair sticking out from underneath (sometimes it's a wig, sometimes her own hair) or women simply wearing wigs (many Orthodox Jewish women wear wigs as these cover every stitch of her own hair, and many of these women also wear scarves,hats, and/or snoods at other times.)

I personally don't own a wig but do cover as much hair as possible- a little does seem to escape at the sides and look messy but I don't worry about that. I won't wear a ponytail sticking out- that's too much hair showing for me.


My story is that in 2002 I decided to start wearing a kippah, partly because I was getting scared of anti-Semitism and wanted to stand up to my fear, and much more so because I wanted to express my belief that we are always in G-d's presence and to sort of invite people to talk about the wonder of that (which hasn't happened much; I live in the Midwest and most people don't ask.  I think in the 8 years I've been wearing one I've gotten a dozen or so queries).

 

Anyway, this past year I started worrying about anti-Semitism again and I prayed about it and felt I was to continue covering (but not for the sake of modesty/hiding my hair, but for the sake of that reminder that at every moment we are in G-d's presence and each person we meet is holy).  So I started wearing hats last winter.  They can be a hassle because if the color does not match the shoes it tends to look a little off, and I don't have time to shoe shop (or when I have tried, I can't find any cute, professional flats or low pumps in grey).  

 

Anyway, I put on my kippah every morning during my prayer-time and then switch it for a hat or scarf when I go out, usually.  This time of year I sometimes just put my hat over it.

 

Here's another question for you:  Can wearing hats thin your hair?  I used to have so much hair, although it's always been fine, and now that I'm getting close to 50, it's gotten so thin that I had to cut it so it would still look good.  I'm wondering if I should switch to scarves just so as to not hasten this thinning thing!

 

I wore a lot of scarves this summer, but they kept slipping off my head unless I held them with clips - well finding cute and unobtrusive clips is hard!!

So any ideas for those?  Pictures would be great too.

 


 

Quote:
Originally Posted by HennyPenny View Post

 
I cover most fo my hair. some in the front sticks out. but all of the length and flow of it is covered. the only part showing is pulled back straight and certainly not "attractive" in the way long flowy hair would be.
honestly is bother me that most christians don't cover more hair. in fact I know a few people who wear a "doily" that is probably the size of my palm over their hair. this kinda confuses me honestly... I mean I guess the "head" has a covering on top of it... but I don't *think* this is what the command had in mind personally. of course, this is left up to many interpretations... I doubt we'd all agree on everything even if we wanted to.


I was interested in the biblical reasons for headcovering.  I do dress pretty modestly but, even though I support women's choice to express their modesty in that way, I don't agree with the idea that hair is immodest, or sexually provocative in a way that would distract men.  Well, when I think of hair color commercials I suppose maybe.  shrug.gif

 

I look forward to reading more - over several days, of course!  I'm most curious to see if anyone else covers for the reasons I do, rather than for modesty.  But I'm sure glad you all who cover for modesty are here because I am loving the websites posted here!

 

-Dancy

post #1006 of 1083

Honestly at this point I have no idea why I cover, it just feels right. there are so many "yeah, maybe that's the reason" but no definite. I started covering because it felt right, and continue to do so for the same reason.

Quote:
 I do dress pretty modestly but, even though I support women's choice to express their modesty in that way, I don't agree with the idea that hair is immodest, or sexually provocative in a way that would distract men.  Well, when I think of hair color commercials I suppose maybe.  shrug.gif

To me, I'm not sure that hair is inherently immodest, however it IS sexually provocative to me. (However, I don't hold that it's women's responsibility not to distract men.  I do want to keep the sexuality of my hair shared only with those I choose, however, it's not my responsibility to cover up if men can't handle their genitals and sexual urges. It's their responsibility to control their urges. )  Honestly, I find attractive long flowing hair more sexy than, say, lots of cleavage showing.  definitely more sexual than shoulders, or knees, or upper thighs, or stomachs, or lots of other body parts modest people often cover. (though there is a difference between finding it sexy and wanting to incorporate it into sexual behavior. It's more of a hot, turn on thing) To me, my hair is the sexist part of me, though perhaps not QUITE the most intimate.   It's also the sexiest on other people to me.  (I love my DP's long hair, and I find healthy long hair attractive and sexy on both genders)

 

So, I totally get the hair is sexy, and can be immodest thing. :shrug  Almost all of my "I don't know if I really want to cover any more, maybe I don't" moments, revolve around wanting to portray myself as sexier and less modest, and get my sexy on a bit.  However, it's not really what I want, catcalls and lewd stares, and feeling a bit indecent.

post #1007 of 1083

I don't think hair is inherently immodest, or that knees are, or clavicles, or navels, or really pretty much any part of the body.  shrug.gif There's a lot to be said for the role of culture in defining what, exactly, is the relationship between the body, sex, what is private, and what is public.  I'm also not quite sure what to do with the notion of what is or is not sexually provocative in this context ... I mean, my own manner of dress excludes quite a bit of what would most definitely not be read as sexually provocative really almost anywhere.  I would not be making the least little bit of a sexually provocative display to go out in an ordinary t-shirt, breezy capris, and tennis shoes. At the same time, it is not impossible for being prevented from view -- to have to conquer, in a sense, in order to gain access -- to be quite provocative.  A great deal of the entire history of orientalist readings of women (see also: Ingres's paintings of the popular imaginings of the interior of Turkish women's bathhouses, for example) is built on that very sense of provocation.

 

At the end of the day, my dress choices just have nothing to do with either of those things -- neither a sense that parts of my body that I keep private from the public are in some way universally better kept private, nor a sense that to wear less fabric would be to be putting some kind of improper sexual temptation out there.  It does, however, have quite a bit to do with playing around with and exercising control over the boundaries of personal privacy, with the idea of costume and how I prefer to be read in different contexts, and -- 'cause it is still a religious thing orngbiggrin.gif -- with finding value in ritual.

 

TBH, I get uncomfortable when arguments for religious dress are framed in terms of sexual morality.  Any basis for that always strikes me as being really, really thin.

post #1008 of 1083
Quote:
Originally Posted by Magelet View Post

Honestly at this point I have no idea why I cover, it just feels right. there are so many "yeah, maybe that's the reason" but no definite. I started covering because it felt right, and continue to do so for the same reason.

Quote:
 I do dress pretty modestly but, even though I support women's choice to express their modesty in that way, I don't agree with the idea that hair is immodest, or sexually provocative in a way that would distract men.  Well, when I think of hair color commercials I suppose maybe.  shrug.gif

To me, I'm not sure that hair is inherently immodest, however it IS sexually provocative to me. (However, I don't hold that it's women's responsibility not to distract men.  I do want to keep the sexuality of my hair shared only with those I choose, however, it's not my responsibility to cover up if men can't handle their genitals and sexual urges. It's their responsibility to control their urges. )  Honestly, I find attractive long flowing hair more sexy than, say, lots of cleavage showing.  definitely more sexual than shoulders, or knees, or upper thighs, or stomachs, or lots of other body parts modest people often cover. (though there is a difference between finding it sexy and wanting to incorporate it into sexual behavior. It's more of a hot, turn on thing) To me, my hair is the sexist part of me, though perhaps not QUITE the most intimate.   It's also the sexiest on other people to me.  (I love my DP's long hair, and I find healthy long hair attractive and sexy on both genders)

 

So, I totally get the hair is sexy, and can be immodest thing. :shrug  Almost all of my "I don't know if I really want to cover any more, maybe I don't" moments, revolve around wanting to portray myself as sexier and less modest, and get my sexy on a bit.  However, it's not really what I want, catcalls and lewd stares, and feeling a bit indecent.


This is interesting!  It's neat that you know this about yourself, because you can really use it in your relationship with your partner.  Then I imagine also that just covering can be sexy between the two of you, kind of like wearing sexy undies that only you and your partner know are on. *grin*

 



Quote:
Originally Posted by Liquesce View Post

I don't think hair is inherently immodest, or that knees are, or clavicles, or navels, or really pretty much any part of the body.  shrug.gif There's a lot to be said for the role of culture in defining what, exactly, is the relationship between the body, sex, what is private, and what is public.  I'm also not quite sure what to do with the notion of what is or is not sexually provocative in this context ... I mean, my own manner of dress excludes quite a bit of what would most definitely not be read as sexually provocative really almost anywhere.  I would not be making the least little bit of a sexually provocative display to go out in an ordinary t-shirt, breezy capris, and tennis shoes. At the same time, it is not impossible for being prevented from view -- to have to conquer, in a sense, in order to gain access -- to be quite provocative.  A great deal of the entire history of orientalist readings of women (see also: Ingres's paintings of the popular imaginings of the interior of Turkish women's bathhouses, for example) is built on that very sense of provocation.

 

At the end of the day, my dress choices just have nothing to do with either of those things -- neither a sense that parts of my body that I keep private from the public are in some way universally better kept private, nor a sense that to wear less fabric would be to be putting some kind of improper sexual temptation out there.  It does, however, have quite a bit to do with playing around with and exercising control over the boundaries of personal privacy, with the idea of costume and how I prefer to be read in different contexts, and -- 'cause it is still a religious thing orngbiggrin.gif -- with finding value in ritual.

 

TBH, I get uncomfortable when arguments for religious dress are framed in terms of sexual morality.  Any basis for that always strikes me as being really, really thin.


It's funny, I really agree with you when it comes to some dress, although there are some forms of dress that really are provocative in my opinion (e.g. I just watched The Court Jester with my family, and I loved it.  It's from 1956, and the dresses are shoulder-baring, and there are scenes where it looks like they are just inviting the men close to them to kiss them on the neck and shoulders.)

However in the Jewish tradition with which I'm familiar, that is what it is about - modesty, tznius, so that's how I've always thought of it.

 

As for playing around with and exercising control over the boundaries of personal privacy...how read in different contexts - this is also really interesting, and I'd like to hear more about it.  It does correspond to some extent with what I've been doing for eight years by wearing a kippah/yarmulke.

 

Thank you mamas for your responses!

-Dancy

post #1009 of 1083

i can get on the dress modest / cover my hair but for 'different' reasons band wagon. I'm pagan and don't mind showing some skin for the right occasion or even all skin (co-ed non sexual saunas and such)  but in general i dress fairly modestly (long skirts and not too low cut tops) and always cover my hair. but.... it just calls to me that way... I in no way feel it is my job to keep men in check that is their job plan and simple. and my gods do no instruct me to cover my hair... but... i don't know... I like the jewish idea of it reminding you that there is something above you and I've also heard the idea that it helps keep other peoples energies out both of which are the best reasons I have at the moment but really i don't have an answer for why i cover at the moment.... 

post #1010 of 1083

Onyxravnos, I cover for pretty much the same reason you do. I'm pagan as well and the best answer I can give as to why I do it is "because I want to". I follow the theory that hair is an antenna, so I'd prefer to control what my hair is exposed to without having to worry about grounding and shielding every second of the day. Otherwise, I cover simply because that is what I feel is the right choice for me to make.

post #1011 of 1083
Quote:
Originally Posted by onyxravnos View Post

i can get on the dress modest / cover my hair but for 'different' reasons band wagon. I'm pagan and don't mind showing some skin for the right occasion or even all skin (co-ed non sexual saunas and such)  but in general i dress fairly modestly (long skirts and not too low cut tops) and always cover my hair. but.... it just calls to me that way... I in no way feel it is my job to keep men in check that is their job plan and simple. and my gods do no instruct me to cover my hair... but... i don't know... I like the jewish idea of it reminding you that there is something above you and I've also heard the idea that it helps keep other peoples energies out both of which are the best reasons I have at the moment but really i don't have an answer for why i cover at the moment.... 



 



Quote:
Originally Posted by wytchywoman View Post

Onyxravnos, I cover for pretty much the same reason you do. I'm pagan as well and the best answer I can give as to why I do it is "because I want to". I follow the theory that hair is an antenna, so I'd prefer to control what my hair is exposed to without having to worry about grounding and shielding every second of the day. Otherwise, I cover simply because that is what I feel is the right choice for me to make.


This is really interesting to me - maybe the fact that it just feels right is an ancient human experience that is part of what led to all the different traditions of head-covering around the world.  Thanks you for explaining!

 

post #1012 of 1083

I got headscarves for Christmas!!!

I was/am so excited!!!

post #1013 of 1083

what a lovely gift!

post #1014 of 1083

I had an interesting question come up from a friend over the holidays that I don't know the answer to. Maybe someone here does? Her question was "is there a Native American tradition of women covering their hair?"

 

I honestly don't know, but don't recall ever seeing pictures with a head covering either.

post #1015 of 1083

Just a side question to head covering…. Somewhat related to the idea that hair is like an antenna or physical extension of our personal energy. I had read that Celtic women braided their hair on their wedding day, to retain their feminine power. I braided mine too, to honor my Celtic roots.

 

I am not sure what hair styling is common under head scarves. Is braiding common? Are their cultures where braiding has meaning or other types of hairstyling under the covering (guess dreadlocks would fall under this category)? Or is the hair style itself just personal preference?

Just curious J

 

Thanks much,

 

Rhianna

post #1016 of 1083

I have seen braiding recommended as a way to keep your hair retained, but I am not sure if there is a "tradition" regarding it.

post #1017 of 1083

I saw this pic, and I thought it was such a pretty style!

Does anyone have an idea as to how I can achieve the same look?

post #1018 of 1083
Quote:
Originally Posted by PatienceAndLove View Post

I saw this pic, and I thought it was such a pretty style!

Does anyone have an idea as to how I can achieve the same look?


Watch this video:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z7JycC8X9e4&feature=related

 

It's rather long and she demonstrates how to wear the hijabi with a niqab or without it (which is the style you like). Once she has the scarf on she demonstrates how to do it both ways.
 

post #1019 of 1083

Danke!

I like the style because it looks a bit like a wimple, and I think those are nifty

post #1020 of 1083

ohh, I like the head socks she is using.  I have some that are similar, but they aren't just one piece-you have to twist them and pass them over your head again.  Her's look more comfy being just the one bit of fabric.  Does anyone have any links by chance?

 

I also need some new snoods.  Mine are the tight fitting cap style and they were SUPER cheap but I can't recall where I got them.  I'm going to poke around as I'm assuming there should be some sales happening!

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