My baby was starving... - Page 3

[operamommy]

Huge hugs to all the mamas who've shared their stories here.

Our dr. commented that my ds2 was "perfectly content to starve." He had some really bad issues with feeding and was diagnosed FTT. He just seemed to have no interest in eating; we could not get him to stay awake at the breast no matter what. I remember at one point my dh gave him a bottle in the middle of the night, but had forgotten to cut the tip of the nipple. Ds2 sucked on that bottle for over 20 minutes while dh dozed and then he fell asleep without eating anything at all and never crying or complaining.

Best of luck to the OP. I did wean my ds2 for a time - the pumping, supplementing etc. was soooo hard on everyone. But I did relactate and managed to nurse him till just after his second birthday. What's most important is that your babe gets the nutrition she needs, no matter in what form. *hugs*

[loraxc]

The problem with DD is that she isn't/wasn't an efficient nurser and my milk supply decreased because she didn't have the stamina to nurse properly.

Yes, this really can happen and it can be a pretty bad cycle (as you and I both found out). My DS is still making up ground he lost, IMO. I actually have a very pro-BF ped (who knew I was very pro-BF) who never suggested supplementing, and believe it or not, I think she should have pushed me to do it. I never, ever thought I would say that, but once I got him eating more I saw that it had really been dysfunctional and he had really been exhausted and malnourished. I also tried finger-feeding and an SNS and it just led to more frustration.

FWIW, DS is now almost 9 months and though he occasionally fusses if my letdown is slow, he still eagerly nurses at breast even with getting 2 bottles a day. As others have mentioned, he has a pretty mellow temperament and that made it harder to see how hungry he really was.

[MSUmama]

Originally Posted by srneda78

I have to be honest and say that I feel incredibly guilty now that I am supplementing 2-3 times a day. I refused and refused to do it and once I gave in, my baby calmed down and was finally satiated. I feel so bad for withholding food from her. I am still nursing and pumping, but I have to get my supply back up. The problem with DD is that she isn't/wasn't an efficient nurser and my milk supply decreased because she didn't have the stamina to nurse properly.

Oh mamas!!! I just happened on this thread and wanted to send love to all of those who are having issues. From ther perspective of someone who is supposed to be able to help with these situations, sometimes the best help is just lots of hugs and encouragement. Don't let anyone try to "encourage" you to do anything you aren't comfortable doing right now, like pushing for less supplementing or less bottles. You have to do what you feel good about doing for your baby.

I've had clients in similar situations and sometimes they may very well have been able to "correct" the issue enough to get baby back to breast 100% but once a mama feels like her body has betrayed her baby, there's often just no coming back from that. It's not something many moms are willing to take a second chance with, AND THAT'S OK!!!! Don't feel guilty for giving bottles or supplememting, and don't let anyone make you doubt your instincts. Stress will kill your supply just as quickly as any physical issue and I'm sure you all know your emotional state is directly tied to your baby's emotional state. Do what you feel you need to do and don't let anyone make you doubt yourself. Big hugs and lots of love!!! :

[3pink1blue]

i haven't read the replies yet, sorry if anything is redundant.

I starved my baby for 8.5 months.

I know now that I had low production (because now I have something to compare it to.)

She was 9lb 2oz at birth and topped out around 12 pounds at 7 months. She screamed at least 8 hours out of every 24, and would not cry herself to sleep. She just screamed and screamed. I could not get her to take a bottle, but even if I could have, both of the LC's I saw were very anti-bottles and of the "formula is evil" mindset. I completely blame it on those two women. If I had had good information, I wouldn't have starved her.
(We found out that she had mild cerebral palsy with hypotonia, and it caused her to not suck well, which caused my low supply. But we found that out much later, when she was about a year old.)

She started growing at 8.5 months when I started solids. If I'd have known, I wouldn't have delayed solids.

I am happy to say she is now 4 years old and amazingly intelligent. She has a very advanced sense of humor and understands the concept of money (as in, 5 pennies in a nickel, 2 nickels in a dime, etc.) She is still tall and thin, but nowhere near as scrawny as during her infancy. With physical therapy, she no longer carries herself funny, so you can't tell she has the mild CP. I don't consider her special needs. The only evidence of CP is that she can't form an "o" with her mouth, like blowing out a candle. Butwe are working on it.

You can beat yourself up with "what if?" and "If i had only known..." but that is counterproductive. When i get those feelings of guilt (and they do come, and i do cry about it sometimes) I try hard to remember that my daughter is fine, and that I have learned an incredible lesson about parenting and about myself.
Trust your insincts, and don't let anyone or any mindset bully you into making destructive decisions. Be flexible, do what works for you and your children, go with the flow. The best we all can do is love our children, keep them healthy, and prepare them for adulthood. (I always say I am trying to raise them so they need as little therapy as possible as adults! lol)

[momtoS]

HUGS to you mama...it must be so hard to see your little one in the hospital.

Take care of you and little one!: