Is there a way to gently encourage a near-stranger?

[Sagesgirl]

One of the girls in my Freshman Comp class is 8.5 months pregnant. Several of us were chatting today before class and I mentioned that we had to swaddle my middle daughter for three months to get her to nurse (I found out last year that it's a near-term preemie thing; they need to be held close & warm to nurse). Another mama said she hadn't had that problem, her boys--both near-term preemies too--had latched right on.

Which sort of broached the subject of breastfeeding. The girl who is pregnant, Sarah I think, said that with kind of a scared look that she wasn't sure about breast feeding and would probably just formula feed.

I'd like to encourage her gently, but I'm not sure how. I am conflicted on this one, because her situation is going to be difficult. She is due to have her baby in the very near future, so it's not like she's going to be able to take a lot of time off from school, and I think one of the biggest reasons for formula feeding is how damned difficult it can be to keep up pumping at work. And college doesn't exactly have mandated break periods. I don't want to set her up to feel guilty if she just cannot do it with her schedule.

But I do want to encourage her. I'm not the sort to dump a lot of information on the head of someone I barely know, so I'm unsure what to do in this situation.

Thoughts?

[13pumpkins]

Just approach her mom to mom and ask her if there are any questions she has and that you would be happy to help. You can slip in the breastfeeding casually, but I would approach her from a mom to mom student angle. I did this with a classmate of mine and she was unable to breastfeed past 5 weeks, but at least she did, at least she asked questions, and at least she learned enough to do so with future children. I like leaving the open door policy regardless of method of feeding because we are all loving moms. Granted, I am hard core breastfeeding, but I recognize I was lucky.

[SeekingJoy]

I would hope I would approach her about it. Even if just to follow up one-on-one to reopen the conversation.

Maybe something along the lines of "when we were talking about breastfeeding the other day, it looked like you were a bit overwhelmed/conflicted. For lots of new moms without exposure to breastfed infants it can be overwhelming. There are benefits to breastfeeding (co-sleeping, not having to know if baby is hungry - just nurse!, sick less often, reduced risk of breast cancer, etc) that no one may have shared with you, and if it is ok, I would really like to."

Good luck!

[Ruthla]

I'd also make sure you tell her that breastfeeding doesn't have to be "all or nothing". If pumping is too hard, she can use formula when the baby's in daycare but still nurse when she and the baby are together. IMO, many moms go to straight formula feeding when "combo feeding" would be very workable for them. Sure, it's not as good as exclusive BF, but a heck of a lot better than exclusive formula feeding.

[merry-mary]

Originally Posted by SeekingJoy

I would hope I would approach her about it. Even if just to follow up one-on-one to reopen the conversation.

Maybe something along the lines of "when we were talking about breastfeeding the other day, it looked like you were a bit overwhelmed/conflicted. For lots of new moms without exposure to breastfed infants it can be overwhelming. There are benefits to breastfeeding (co-sleeping, not having to know if baby is hungry - just nurse!, sick less often, reduced risk of breast cancer, etc) that no one may have shared with you, and if it is ok, I would really like to."

Good luck!

Originally Posted by Ruthla

I'd also make sure you tell her that breastfeeding doesn't have to be "all or nothing". If pumping is too hard, she can use formula when the baby's in daycare but still nurse when she and the baby are together. IMO, many moms go to straight formula feeding when "combo feeding" would be very workable for them. Sure, it's not as good as exclusive BF, but a heck of a lot better than exclusive formula feeding.

Yes and yes! These are wonderful responses and I really would encourage you to follow these posters' advice and approach her. Good luck!