Psyche is healing, Vjayjay still broken!

[anyalily]

I had my LO 17 weeks ago. We planned a birth center birth and transferred to a hospital. It was hard and painful and awful, but I feel good about the transfer, the care I received throughout it all and the necessary interventions that allowed me to have a vag birth.

35 hours and more than 35 stitches took a toll on my naughty bits. I had a sarcus tear and my labia ripped open. TMI - sorry! My midwife and doctor did a great job of stitching me up (took longer than pushing and I felt every stitch).

Needless to say, 6 weeks PP was not enough to get back to normal. DH and I just tried to make love for the 4th time and were unsuccessful. Ouch does not say it!

My midwife said it could take up to a year for me to feel totally healed and even then will never feel the same.

When will I be able to make love? Dang!

Anyone else have this experience? I am feeling frigid! :

[thixle]

[bobandjess99]

I had a similar REALLY bad tear..well, set of tears, I guess, they were EVERYWHERE...
It took us until 10 months PP to be able to actually have intercourse. We tried every month or so from about 3 months on, but it was always a no-go due to excruciating pain. At 10 months it was *possible*. at 18 months pp it was *nice*.

this time around, i tore badly again, but recovered much more quickly....honestly, I think waiting longer to try such that we were not REinjuring everything ever couple weeks was the KEY. We waited until 4ish months pp, which is when i *felt* like maybe things were okay...and it was. There was still extra tenderness, bordering on soreness until 6 months pp or so, but since then it has been basically normal.

[RiverMamma]

Give yorself plenty of time, I had a c/s (after 2 days of pushing though,) and I was sore for about 4mo. BF dryness hormones don't help either.

[isabellamirac]

One very wise friend of mine gave this advice: "inebriate and lubricate"

but ds is 6 mos, and it's just been in the past 4 weeks or so that even with a nice chianti and KY that I'm remotely comfortable.

Take your time, be patient. It'll get better.

[holyhelianthus]