Lactivism "Gone Wrong" (funny or funny-in-retrospect stories, not vents)

[2lilsweetfoxes]

Have you ever gone into how much better breastfeeding is with someone only to have it blown up in your face?

Has someone ever done it with you or someone you know?

My "Lactivism Gone Wrong" story--

I'd just returned to work a couple weeks before. My son's babysitter had to run some errands, which involved going to the local mall. (Her son needed new jeans or something like that--growth spurt) Well, of course she took my son with her, which I'd okayed and took a couple bottles (of my EBM). As all babies are wont to do, he got hungry and so she sat down in the food court and gave him one of the bottles after warming it. Some lady comes up to her and berates her for not breastfeeding, telling her how "bad" formula is. She then calmly explained that she was the nanny and that his mother was breastfeeding. She and I laughed about it and then I decided that I'd never berate a woman who was caring for an infant, but otherwise I know nothing about her, for not breastfeeding. You don't know their story. That woman might not be mom.

ETA: My son and his sitter had the same coloring (both blonde with blue eyes--I have brown hair and brown eyes, though I wasn't present, so I could see how someone might assume she was mom--even had we all been together, although in that case, I would have just breastfed the baby.)

[ErinsJuneBug]

One of my friends has REALLY big boobs. She couldnt figure out how to NIP without totally taking her shirt off. For a whole morning i went to her house and she practiced sitting in front of a mirror.....we then went to the mall. It was the middle of the day, only nanas and mommies there = the perfect time for her first NIP. She got all set up at a table on the food court, but while she was trying to get into position her DS was getting REALLY hungry. I could tell she was feeling frantic. Well...she rushed and ended up slamming his head on the table making him scream even louder. Poor baby, and my poor friend. She gave him a bottle of BM and while she nursed him for 13 months she could never NIP.

[annie_noah]

I sat front row and centre at the Breastfeeding Challenge, which put me in line of the photographers covering the event for the local newspaper. There were two shots of me on the newspaper's web site, one where I was looking down at DD and you can clearly see the gray roots on my hair (desperately needed to get my colour done) and on the other one, DD turned to look at the camera while still latched on and there is a clear view of my entire breast (except the nipple) with her waving at the camera.

I wanted to proudly show those photos to people, but now I'm a bit embarrassed of them.

[1littlebit]

i had someone say something to me about bottle feeding and how bfing is best and i should have done more research. I thought you know what i work my a$$ off to pump 4-5 oz a day who the He!! are you to tell me I'm not doing what's best for my baby. all i said was yes i know. i was heartbroken. not really funny... but afterwards i was like i should have just lied and told her it was EBM in the bottle... i mean it is at least once a day.. so it could have been true would have spared me the lecture

o and once someone told me i can't encourage people to bf b/c ds is ff.... and you cant be a lactivist if you ff. i guess i'll just get a job for mead johnson then

[pumpkinhead]

I had something similar happen with my formula fed nephew. He and I have red hair and neither of his parents do (interestingly, neither of my children have redhair). Someone in a food court assumed he was mine as I was giving him a bottle and offered to give me breastfeeding info and support for the next one. She wasn't nasty about it and I'm not sure that she believed me when I told her he wasn't mine, but it was still a mildly amusing situation.

What is funny is that SIL has dark blonde hair and blue eyes and ended up with a redheaded, green eyed baby boy. I have red hair and greenish eyes and ended up with a blonde haired, blue eyed, baby boy. Genetics :.

[Kappa]

Not funny in print, but it was hilarious if you could've seen it. I carry a Medela backpack style around with me on campus, but I also have a book bag and laptop bag, so I look bogged down most of the time. One of my profs who I see 3x a week finally asked me what's in the backpack, and I told him it was a breast pump (he knows I have a baby). He threw his hands up and shook his head as if to say "I don't want to hear any more! Do you!"

[ramama]

Once when DD1 was an infant, we were sitting at a table at an outside deli and DD1 was nursing. I was past the painful stage, and in the wow-my-breasts-are-numb stage, but still quite engorged. I was people watching contently. I looked down to check on DD and noticed that she was also people-watching, no longer nursing. My breast was totally exposed and 5 streams of breastmilk were shooting onto (and running down) the back of the leather jacket of the man sitting at the table next to us. It was just funny because he was about three feet away from us (he wasn't wearing the jacket, it was draped over his chair) and the BM was shooting with such force that it was making that sound of a high-powered liquid stream hitting leather. We got up and inconspicuously moved our seat. I doubt that man would have been much of a lactivist if he knew what had happened.

[turtlewomyn]

Originally Posted by ramama

Once when DD1 was an infant, we were sitting at a table at an outside deli and DD1 was nursing. I was past the painful stage, and in the wow-my-breasts-are-numb stage, but still quite engorged. I was people watching contently. I looked down to check on DD and noticed that she was also people-watching, no longer nursing. My breast was totally exposed and 5 streams of breastmilk were shooting onto (and running down) the back of the leather jacket of the man sitting at the table next to us. It was just funny because he was about three feet away from us (he wasn't wearing the jacket, it was draped over his chair) and the BM was shooting with such force that it was making that sound of a high-powered liquid stream hitting leather. We got up and inconspicuously moved our seat. I doubt that man would have been much of a lactivist if he knew what had happened.

OK, I think you win for funniest story so far.

[CallMeMommy]

Originally Posted by ramama

Once when DD1 was an infant, we were sitting at a table at an outside deli and DD1 was nursing. I was past the painful stage, and in the wow-my-breasts-are-numb stage, but still quite engorged. I was people watching contently. I looked down to check on DD and noticed that she was also people-watching, no longer nursing. My breast was totally exposed and 5 streams of breastmilk were shooting onto (and running down) the back of the leather jacket of the man sitting at the table next to us. It was just funny because he was about three feet away from us (he wasn't wearing the jacket, it was draped over his chair) and the BM was shooting with such force that it was making that sound of a high-powered liquid stream hitting leather. We got up and inconspicuously moved our seat. I doubt that man would have been much of a lactivist if he knew what had happened.

:

[mamajake]

I vote for Ramama's story as the winner as well.

Don't know if my story quite fits but here goes. I was running a breastfeeding information booth with comfy nursing space in a huge gross baby expo. It had been a long day of both helping lots of moms but also getting nasty comments and glares from many other passersby. I was spent and irritable. After I had heard from lots of moms that the comfy spot I had was not well marked on the expo center map and that they had nursed in the bathroom, I went to put a sign up in the ladies room that said something like: "Please feel free to use Booth XXX - No Need to Nurse Your Child in the Bathroom." As I was taping it up, an older woman said really loudly, "That is disgusting!" I was just about to let loose on her (something I have never done but I was just sick of it) when she proceeds to rant - really rant - "I can not imagine ever nursing my child in a bathroom! Who would think they have to do that?! That is just terrible! I nursed all my children and I did it anywhere I was! Why should a woman have to hide breastfeeding. It is the most natural thing in the world! Who would have a problem with that? It's great you have a comfortable booth but why would a woman even need to be told she doesn't have to nurse in the bathroom?" And on and on and on. We ended up having a wonderful talk about breastfeeding but it was a while before she calmed down.

[St. Margaret]

Originally Posted by Kappa

Not funny in print, but it was hilarious if you could've seen it. I carry a Medela backpack style around with me on campus, but I also have a book bag and laptop bag, so I look bogged down most of the time. One of my profs who I see 3x a week finally asked me what's in the backpack, and I told him it was a breast pump (he knows I have a baby). He threw his hands up and shook his head as if to say "I don't want to hear any more! Do you!"

I can totally picture a professor doing that, not out of disrespect, but just feeling like he overstepped by asking and it bit him back

My story is this: At this HUGE family birthday party, many of my family (who live, oh, 90 minutes away) were just seeing DD for the first time (at ~11mo). So I'm nursing DD and my aunt walks by and said, "Cover up, cover up!" and I was getting all offended and said something about DD just eating, and I was ready to flash my boob at her just to tell her to knock it off, but my mom was sitting next to me and eventually explained that's what their mom used to say to them all the time. Later my aunt came over and joked about how her kids nursed so long and her DH is STILL nursing . So she had just been trying to joke with my mom about how their mom would always say that to them, but it got me all ready to go lactivist on her!

[SpiderMum]

Originally Posted by ramama

Once when DD1 was an infant, we were sitting at a table at an outside deli and DD1 was nursing. I was past the painful stage, and in the wow-my-breasts-are-numb stage, but still quite engorged. I was people watching contently. I looked down to check on DD and noticed that she was also people-watching, no longer nursing. My breast was totally exposed and 5 streams of breastmilk were shooting onto (and running down) the back of the leather jacket of the man sitting at the table next to us. It was just funny because he was about three feet away from us (he wasn't wearing the jacket, it was draped over his chair) and the BM was shooting with such force that it was making that sound of a high-powered liquid stream hitting leather. We got up and inconspicuously moved our seat. I doubt that man would have been much of a lactivist if he knew what had happened.

This is hilarious! I'm glad he didn't notice...that would have been a rather awkward conversation.

[meganmarie]

Not exactly a lactivist story but an adventures-in-bfing story. When I was pumping at work I sometimes used a little teeny "phone room" for pumping. It wasn't officially a lactation room - anyone could use it to make a call - but it had a good desk and outlets and lighting so I could be multitasking. So one time rather than schlepping everything, I just went ahead and left the Medela pump-in-style bag there afterwards, since I'd be back again in 3 hours - I just tucked it under the desk out of the way. Well apparently the next person to use the room saw a mysterious black bag with some tubes poking through the zippers, peeked inside and saw the dials and wires, and then REPORTED it to our facilities department as a possible BOMB. It apparently caused a minor ruckus before the female receptionist saw what it was, and calmed everyone down. I started diligently carting the thing back and forth with me from then on.

[1littlebit]

Originally Posted by meganmarie

Not exactly a lactivist story but an adventures-in-bfing story. When I was pumping at work I sometimes used a little teeny "phone room" for pumping. It wasn't officially a lactation room - anyone could use it to make a call - but it had a good desk and outlets and lighting so I could be multitasking. So one time rather than schlepping everything, I just went ahead and left the Medela pump-in-style bag there afterwards, since I'd be back again in 3 hours - I just tucked it under the desk out of the way. Well apparently the next person to use the room saw a mysterious black bag with some tubes poking through the zippers, peeked inside and saw the dials and wires, and then REPORTED it to our facilities department as a possible BOMB. It apparently caused a minor ruckus before the female receptionist saw what it was, and calmed everyone down. I started diligently carting the thing back and forth with me from then on.

[Cassiopeia]

Great stories!

[limabean]

Originally Posted by Kappa

Not funny in print, but it was hilarious if you could've seen it. I carry a Medela backpack style around with me on campus, but I also have a book bag and laptop bag, so I look bogged down most of the time. One of my profs who I see 3x a week finally asked me what's in the backpack, and I told him it was a breast pump (he knows I have a baby). He threw his hands up and shook his head as if to say "I don't want to hear any more! Do you!"

Ha -- I had something similar happen to me. I had my breastpump and bottles in a small ice chest that I carried to work with me when I had to go to the office to train someone. One day my boss said, "Here you are without your kids in tow and you still have a bunch of equipment to cart around! What are you carrying?" and I said, "It's ... erm ... well ... I have to have this with me expressly because I'm not with the kids today." He understood immediately and blushed and said, "...and I think we'll stop that conversation right there."

[chi_mama]

Um, well not sure it's a lactivist story... although I did promote pumping I guess
I live in an area where you have to pass through 2 government run security gates to get from town to the highway. When the gates were first built they were unmanned for a month before they were put to use. I would pump while driving each day to and from work. The 2nd day the guards were in place I drove straight thru without stopping (from habit) They sent 4 vehicles after me, pulled me over on the side of the road blocking my vehicle on all sides with theirs and got out with their hands on their guns The man in charge is approaching my car like he's going to shoot me.... I crack the window and say "wait, I'm pumping breastmilk! Please give me a second to dress". He turns and announces to his partners "Stop, she's breastfeeding! Stay put". I quickly unhook and pull my shirt down and get out. They tell me I have to search the car... which lasts about 15 seconds when they see two bottles of fresh milk, uncapped in the cup holders attached to the pump still. They gave me a stern reminder and let me go. I'm just thankful that the first man that spoke with me understood what I was saying... otherwise I would have been standing on the side of the road still attached to the pump while all my neighbors and family were commuting home.
I imagine this being brought up in training each year

[jessjgh1]

Ah nothing to contribute, but these made me smile(-; Jessica

[Lunaria]

I love these stories!

Mine also involves being at the recent breastfeeding challenge in my city. I was so proud it was me and ds' second challenge. And being a gung-ho lactivist I sit at the front. Well wouldn't ya know it but it is impossible to make a nearly 2 year old nurse. I tried desperately to get him to sit with me but he just fussed and kicked until I let him down again to play with the big kids. So there I was, the only woman not breastfeeding at latch on time. And of course both local newspapers clearly captured my very unhappy face and empty arms. Ugh!

Jenny