mind/body wellness help

[crazyrunningmama]

Howdy!! I hardly post here any more, feel free to tell me that you've missed me, I need the ego boost. I am losing my mind. Work is super stressful, for some reason I thought I could handle taking 2 courses as well, and I have a 2 year old. I had a BFP followed by a m/c in August and am at this moment waiting for AF so I can start my bcps for our FET.

Please, help me with mind/body, relaxation, stress-fighting stuff. I feel like that is what is going to make the difference. Suggestions of good relaxation or visualization CD's? How to fit in relaxation time with a toddler? Other ideas or tips????
I am already thinking of quitting my job!!!!

thanks!!!

[Dena]

There is a great DVD I used when getting ready for IVF for my second child, "Yoga for Infertility," I think it is called. It is a very nice, low stress workout. I would also recommend acupunture - really helped me stay grounded, and massage if you have the time.

It was also around this time we moved our then-toddler to her own bed and started putting her to bed earlier. She had been staying up till nine or so and was then napping at 4p.m. We moved up her bedtime and cut out the nap. Suddenly she was sleeping twelve hours straight and we had a couple of hours to ourselves in the evenings. That time really helps me to refocus and center at the end of the day.

Also, and I know you know this, but good nutrition, a good pre-natal vitamin, and high quality fish oil supplements are essential for me to keep up my energy and feel my best. And if I am not dragging around exhausted I am far more likely to do the other things that help me de-stress.

[pinkfriend]

Hey CRM!
I have missed you! I am currently doing yoga once a week. I'm also doing acupuncture once a week and that has been life changing for me in terms of my mood and how I handle stress. This may sound corny, but I am an Oprah fan and have found lots of great resources on her website. Marianne Williamson, Micheal Losier, Eckhart Tolle and Oprah's soul series ( you can listen to past shows online) are all great resources from that website. I am also starting to go for weekly massages until my ER /ET. I am lucky to have pretty good benefits so a lot these things are partially covered for me which is a huge financial help. I am also giving myself about a half an hour each morning to have a cup of tea, relax, pray, meditate, write in my gratitude journal (which I also just recently started).

Not sure if you read my post in the Fall IVF cyclers, but I am a firm believer in stress levels and IVF success rates so take care of yourself!

[DaisyMae08]

I second the acupuncture. It has been life changing for me as well. Not only did it help my cycle (no more spotting or clots, and much easier time w/pms and cramping) but it has helped immensely in terms of dealing with stress and controlling anxiety. Well worth the hour each week.

[Julia'sMom]

Hey CRM! I've been thinking a lot about you and SR lately.

As for me, what helped best is when I would go to bed before completely exhausted. I would then use that quiet time to imagine how I wanted my life to be. Sometimes I'd daydream of being hugely pregnant, sometimes of having the newborns with me, sometimes having the complete family of grade schoolers and beyond. Regardless it was always a beautiful, happy dream where nothing went wrong. I'd worry about everything else during the day, but drifting off to sleep I made sure was peaceful and hopeful.

[crazyrunningmama]

Thanks everyone!! I actually started accupuncture again last week, right around when I was starting this thread. I can also now add: avoid sugar and white flour!!! I have felt so low energy and crappy today, completely blaming Halloween excesses! I have been re-reading parts of "Conquering Infertility" and made myself a list ( in case anyone else is looking to this thread for ideas):
- breath focus
- body scan
- progressive muscle relaxation
- meditation
- mindfulness
- mindful medititation
- guided imagery
- yoga

Also: journalling, practicing pleasure/self nurturance, social support and attenidng support groups. Can't find a support group, guess you guys are it

Now I need to make time to do some of these strategies!! Also some exercise would probably help. Thanks for you feedback and to you JuliasMom, how are you doing?

[poetgirl]

Originally Posted by crazyrunningmama

Thanks everyone!! I actually started accupuncture again last week, right around when I was starting this thread. I can also now add: avoid sugar and white flour!!! I have felt so low energy and crappy today, completely blaming Halloween excesses! I have been re-reading parts of "Conquering Infertility" and made myself a list ( in case anyone else is looking to this thread for ideas):
- breath focus
- body scan
- progressive muscle relaxation
- meditation
- mindfulness
- mindful medititation
- guided imagery
- yoga

Also: journalling, practicing pleasure/self nurturance, social support and attenidng support groups. Can't find a support group, guess you guys are it

Now I need to make time to do some of these strategies!! Also some exercise would probably help. Thanks for you feedback and to you JuliasMom, how are you doing?

CRM, I missed you! And I'm sorry that you are still on this side of things, sounds like you are going through a pretty stressful time. You mentioned guided imagery and this has really been a saving grace for me. I have two recommendations in this area. One is www.anjionline.com They have a fertility line on guid. med. one for ART, PCOS, IVF, nat. cycle, something called "meditations for a fertile soul" that is done in collaboration w/ Randine Lewis and a really great one for general health. You can download them for around $20 and get it in an ipod and do it before bed. I also used to do it when waiting before my iuis. Gen. Health is great if you don't want to be reminded of this whole shebang, but the others are great too. I also love and use guided meditations by Rod Styker (parayoga.com). I think the one I have and adore is "Meditations for Life" but I'll double check that. I hope that helps. Take good care.

[cincynana]

I love the anji meditations. I also have some other meditations that I got for free online (I'm not at home, but once I am, I'll look at my iTunes and see where I got them!) Sometimes I use fertility meditations, sometimes I use just general relaxation meditiations. I usually use them at night. I have a Yoga Fertility dvd, but I haven't used it yet. I really need to make time for myself and do it!

ETA:
http://deeptrancenow.com/
I bought the Fertility hypnosis and I really like it. I love her voice.
She also has a page of free downloads. I have used several of them and think they are great, too. Its a good way to determine if you like her style, if that makes sense!

[crazyrunningmama]

Thanks so much for all of this feedback everyone. Unbelievably, I don't have an iPod OR an mp3player. (my walkman from 1984 still works though!)

Accupuncture has really been helping, I had a spa day and got a massage the other day and I am going to my holistic healer next week. She does aromatherapy/guided imagery/visualization/crystal bowl sound healing. I am starting the suppression spray next week and it makes me crazy and scattered, so going to my voodoo lady will help me to feel grounded. I really like the positive visualization ideas, I will use them. And I worked out today, wahoo!!!

[Masel]

When I was waiting for my bloodwork the other day I read an article about Feng Shui and fertility. Now, I tend to be skeptical but I can see how how you treat your environment reflects how you treat yourself. One of the main suggestions was decluttering the master bedroom. Like a lot of people my bedroom had become the dumping ground of last resort for the whole house. I had also been bad about putting laundry away. Well, closet doors that actually close and a decluttered beside table has meant more restful sleep and less stress. Since me DH is highly motivated for us to conceive he even cleaned up his side of the room and started on his dresser! I didn't even have to nag. (I was completely floored that my engineer hubby who is even more of a skeptic than me went for the Feng Shui thing.)

However, I also have a toddler and I do not have high hopes for the figureines I put on our nightstands to actually stay there. We already had an elephant (for fertility my side) and a dragon (for virility, his side, he had a low count).

Another thing they suggested was making space for the baby. Again I'd laugh at this but my daugher appeared in my life just after we did a serious declutter on the room that would be hers.

At least these things are all good on their own and helped me to feel like I was doing something when I can't control my reproductive system.

[Dena]

You know, I do think there is something to Feng Shui. At least the decluttering aspect. I know I feel better if I can walk through a tidy house. I feel much more at peace. Clutter for me is like having harsh lights overhead, with the radio and TV blaring at the same time.

And I do have to second the idea about making room for the baby. Both of our kids were products of IVF, but neither appeared until we had a room set aside for each of them.

Oh, and I wanted to correct the title of the DVD I posted about earlier - it is actually "Yoga 4 Fertility" with Brenda Strong.

[crazyrunningmama]

Huh. Very very good thoughts. I am so cluttered and it bugs me, but I am also a student and work part time, so taking time to de-clutter seems like procrastination to me. But I should.

Regarding Feng Shui, my sister gave me a smiling Buddha with children with strict instructions to place him at eye level or above, facing the door to the mail living room. He's squeezed in with my books and I did get pg since having him....

[wtg4miracle]

I want to say I really love this thread. This is something I need to do cause I am such a wreck right now. I can't stop crying. I am snapping at everybody and being a total witch. I need to find ways to calm down and get my self straighten out.

I am taking notes here. I think I will look into acupuncture and yoga for now.

Thanks everyone for the ideas and thoughts. All of these tips will help guide me to where I can come to terms with how I am feeling(bitter and sadness).

[crazyrunningmama]

Originally Posted by wtg4miracle

I want to say I really love this thread. This is something I need to do cause I am such a wreck right now. I can't stop crying. I am snapping at everybody and being a total witch. I need to find ways to calm down and get my self straighten out.

I am taking notes here. I think I will look into acupuncture and yoga for now.

Thanks everyone for the ideas and thoughts. All of these tips will help guide me to where I can come to terms with how I am feeling(bitter and sadness).

It sucks.
One thing you can do right now and every day is to take a moment when ever you can to be mindful. Just now I was taking the garbage to the curb. I stopped for a minute and really felt the rain, really looked at the sky and listened to the wind. Noticed my breathing. It helped. One more take care

[wtg4miracle]

Originally Posted by crazyrunningmama

It sucks.
One thing you can do right now and every day is to take a moment when ever you can to be mindful. Just now I was taking the garbage to the curb. I stopped for a minute and really felt the rain, really looked at the sky and listened to the wind. Noticed my breathing. It helped. One more take care

Thanks crazyrm-This is great you say this. Its looks like you are practicing "The Power of Now" from Echart Tolle. I'm trying to read his book. Its going to take me awhile cause its deep hard reading. The main jist is to enjoy "now" while you have it, forget the past and not worry about the future. He says if you are in the shower don't think about what you need to do all day. Just feel the water hitting you, smell the soaps and shampoo. He does have some truth to this. I feel like many times in my life I worry so much and not enjoy life while its happening right now. Then I look back and I never did enjoy each day cause I was always worrying my happiness away.

[cincynana]

There was an article in the Fall 2008 issue of Conceive magazine about feng shui for fertility. Some of their tips for the bedroom include making sure the decor is gender neutral and calming. Avoid flower designs in the bedroom. Remove books, the computer and the tv from the bedroom. Make sure you can't hear running or dripping water (represents loss of energy). In bed, a women should sleep on the right side and a man on the left to harmonize and balance the couple's energy.

It does talk about making room for baby by decluttering and storing or getting rid of 1/3 of things you don't need.

[Masel]

That's the article I saw. I also I looked up some other tips googling "feng shui fertility".

Do you remember what the motivation was not having flower designs in the bedroom? I'm not quite ready to give up the curtains.

[Bena]

I like the philosophy of making room in your life for a child. I have come to the realization that our lives were sooo busy, we actually didn`t have time for a child! I realise now how sad that is, and we are both, my husband and I, trying real hard to reassess our schedules and priorities. But I never extended that philosophy to our house! There is no room for a child, or child things!

Well, so now, for what it`s worth, I spent a rainy saturday afternoon decluttering our kitchen and a bit of the bedroom. It felt good to give all this stuff we never use to goodwill. I imagined a family in need (and with children) receiving our dishes and stuff. My next step is to take care of the room that would be a baby`s room.

[cincynana]

re: Flowers

According to the article...

avoid fresh flowers; floral pillows and bed coverings; and wallpaper with a flower design: in feng shui terms, flowers are the yang, or male, expression of a plant, which can compete with your husband's yang energy.

I guess I should remove the flower paintings in our room. It was time for a change anyway