Stupid/Asinine/Unnecessary/Inappropriate Comments: Post away! - Page 14

[musiclady]

how about people who want to tell you stories about babies they knew in the nicu that didn't make it... ?

or the very annoying "at least you got to meet your little one early" um, yeah, but i still wanted a "normal" pregnancy,whatever that is. and yes, i'm thankful to have had this extra time with her, but i would have much rather waited and not had to ask her to do so many things she shouldn't have needed to do. and not to mention that a baby that is 2lbs 5oz is SCARY.

[myfairbabies]

I got the best one from dh yesterday. He told me this story that he thought I would think was hilarious:

A coworker was making fun of his new haircut (she always does this, not really sure why) and at one point said "You know, your wife could leave you at any time" And he said "Yeah, because she has so many options. I can see her personal ad right now- 5'2" (which I'm not), blonde hair, 9 months pregnant." He basically meant no one wants to date a pregnant woman.

hardeeharhar. Way to make me feel special. Once I explained what an idiot he was he apologized, but I don't think he really got it.

[Beauchamp]

Originally Posted by notyetamommy

"You know, your wife could leave you at any time"

Okay, I think this may be the dumber, more asinine comment. Why would she say this? Seems kind of inappropriate to me for the workplace.

I'm sorry your DH didn't get it. Mine doesn't either, sometimes, and I just eventually have to give up and hope he does something sweet and endearing pretty darn quick to make up for it. :

[myfairbabies]

Originally Posted by Beauchamp

Okay, I think this may be the dumber, more asinine comment. Why would she say this? Seems kind of inappropriate to me for the workplace.

Lol, yeah, like I would leave him because I don't like his hair (I gave him that haircut btw! which I thought would have been a more appropriate response from dh, lol). When he had long hair, she made fun of him everyday until he said it was sexual harassment. And she's a total hypocrite and pushes her views on everyone else. I really can't stand her and I don't even know her!

[phrogger]

Originally Posted by musiclady

how about people who want to tell you stories about babies they knew in the nicu that didn't make it... ?

or the very annoying "at least you got to meet your little one early" um, yeah, but i still wanted a "normal" pregnancy,whatever that is. and yes, i'm thankful to have had this extra time with her, but i would have much rather waited and not had to ask her to do so many things she shouldn't have needed to do. and not to mention that a baby that is 2lbs 5oz is SCARY.

Yes, that would piss me off. Or how about my MIL telling me I should have the baby early so she could be here, and when I said I didn't want a preemie in the nicu, she said "I had two in the NICU, it isn't that big of a deal". WTF. I don't want to not bring my baby home with me, and if it happened that way, I would deal with it, but I would NEVER wish it on someone.

[beachcomber]

Right now I'm struggling with a PUPPP rash that's gotten really bad. I'm itchy as heck, all over and it's just miserable. My mother in-law yesterday told me, after I complained of the itchiness, that "I asked for this." by wanting to be pregnant again.

Um, no. I did not ask for a rash all over my arms, legs, boobs, belly, neck, etc. I certainly did not ask for that. Not all women get it so why is it that because I'm suffering, I somehow deserve to be suffering?! I darn near swore at her. All I did say was, "You didn't really just tell me I asked for this, did you?!" She backtracked right away. Grrr.

[vegemamaVA]

Originally Posted by beachcomber

Right now I'm struggling with a PUPPP rash that's gotten really bad. I'm itchy as heck, all over and it's just miserable. My mother in-law yesterday told me, after I complained of the itchiness, that "I asked for this." by wanting to be pregnant again.

Um, no. I did not ask for a rash all over my arms, legs, boobs, belly, neck, etc. I certainly did not ask for that. Not all women get it so why is it that because I'm suffering, I somehow deserve to be suffering?! I darn near swore at her. All I did say was, "You didn't really just tell me I asked for this, did you?!" She backtracked right away. Grrr.

Oh man! Them's fightin' words! What is it with mother-in-laws? She's lucky you didn't take a swing at her. (I should write this stuff down, for when I'm a mother-in-law)

[sunflwrmoonbeam]

Oh, I have a good one that's been building up for a long time!

As a bit of backstory, there's this woman in my grove (a pagan "church") who's perfectly fertile but has had one stillbirth, one miscarriage, and no living children. I am working on pregnancy #6, kid #1.

Due to my history of loss I know all to well how much it hurts when people rub their pregnancy in your face, so I did my best to not mention it much around her except when it was explicitly relevant. Notably, I developed SPD at 10 weeks which has limited my mobility significantly and which has a direct impact on my ability to attend grove functions. So, obviously, most of what this woman hears is about that, and only vaguely.

Today the SPD flared up pretty badly and I was in some excruciating pain, and complained about it on facebook. So I get not one, but 2! messages from her about how I'm not "appreciating" my pregnancy enough and that, and I'm quoting here, "every pain is a gift."

So apparently I'm supposed to be in excruciating pain for 6+ months and bear it all with a smile? While during her first pregnancy she was complaining about how even KICKS hurt. I've tried my best to be gracious and considerate, but no I don't get the same courtesy. (*$)@J)I)(#QLK@)$!! WHy yes I want to cuss her out, a lot. Not like she didn't have a bad habit of rubbing her pregnancy in my face shortly after my 2nd miscarriage.

BAH!!!!!!!!

This is the same woman who was giving me all sorts of horrible advice, monitoring what I consume and generally butting her nose in to things that weren't her business all. the. time. She's also (recently) delighted in telling me birth horror stories! She's like every bad stereotype of the way society treats pregnant women, all on her lonesome. I'm SO SICK of this, and finally went off on her (very very gently) tonight. If she keeps this up, oh the words they will fly!

[beachcomber]

Good for you telling her off, however gently! She sounds like a bit of a narcissist regarding what she's been through. Like nobody on the planet has suffered as she has, sort of thing. Ugh.

[myfairbabies]

An annoying one I've been getting like crazy lately, is "how much longer do you have?" How the heck am I supposed to know? This kid didn't come with an expiration date! It could be 12 hours, it could be 4 weeks, which is what I've started telling people (or usually, I say "between 2-4 weeks", I'm 38 weeks now).

[rivkah]

Originally Posted by notyetamommy

An annoying one I've been getting like crazy lately, is "how much longer do you have?" How the heck am I supposed to know? This kid didn't come with an expiration date! It could be 12 hours, it could be 4 weeks, which is what I've started telling people (or usually, I say "between 2-4 weeks", I'm 38 weeks now).

I have exactly the same complaint. I really wish I knew! I just say, "Pretty soon!"

[happyhippimama]

My reply is usually, Anytime between now and 4 weeks from now.

[pearl2]

I also dread people asking that question, because I know a stupid response comes out of their mouths no matter what. I could say the real "due" date (June 27) or I could say between summer solstice and Independence Day, but inevitably a dumb comment will follow. I actually just say, "NEVER!" and then cackle a maniacle laugh, which usually scares them off. I've also thought about saying something like a lie, like August, just to really set them off.

[MangoMommy]

Ahh yes I'm obviously huge at this point (38w) and I get asked all the time how much longer. I guess in the world of scheduled inductions/csections (which I know are necessary sometimes!) everyone just knows.

I just say "anytime she wants" or something like that.

The other thing I get ALL THE TIME is the name thing!! Did you pick a name? What's her name? Blah blah LISTEN PEOPLE. I'll tell you when she's born, ok? I've been saying that for 9 months now...that's how we named the other 2 (that's aimed towards family, since they should know better, we don't "prename" our kids!) and that's how we are naming this one!

[myfairbabies]

Originally Posted by MangoMommy

Ahh yes I'm obviously huge at this point (38w) and I get asked all the time how much longer. I guess in the world of scheduled inductions/csections (which I know are necessary sometimes!) everyone just knows.

I just say "anytime she wants" or something like that.

The other thing I get ALL THE TIME is the name thing!! Did you pick a name? What's her name? Blah blah LISTEN PEOPLE. I'll tell you when she's born, ok? I've been saying that for 9 months now...that's how we named the other 2 (that's aimed towards family, since they should know better, we don't "prename" our kids!) and that's how we are naming this one!

I said the 2-4 week thing to someone recently and she gave me the most confused look, lol! Also, we don't prename the baby either, and now when people ask if we have names picked out, I tell them that we've stopped talking about it and won't be talking about it until after the baby is born. That's not entirely true, but for the most part dh is so difficult and we just can't agree so we're waiting to try some names out on the little one (plus we don't know if it's a boy or girl, so if we wait, then that cuts down on the arguing by 50%!). My family doesn't ask at all (they already know I won't tell them anything we are considering), so I only deal with that from others.

[myfairbabies]

What do people mean by "Are you sure it's not twins?" I mean, don't you think I, of all people, would want to know if I was going to be birthing two babies pretty soon? I haven't had an u/s, but I'm as sure as I can be based on midwives palpitating the baby, listening to the heartbeat, and the fact that I'm always measuring between 0-2 weeks ahead. By asking that question, do they think I'm all of a sudden going to realize, "No! I'm not sure! I better go find out right now!" Thanks for telling me you think I'm ginormous. I actually like my huge belly, thank you very much.

[amandaleigh37]

My MIL asked me if this baby is bigger than DS was. I looked at her kind of puzzled and said "Um I don't know? We'll know when he's out and we weigh him." She was like "Oh, I thought they usually tell you those things by now." Hmm ok.

And yesterday my mom asked "So how long will the midwives let you go before they induce you?" (I'm planning a homebirth). I said "You're kidding right?" She looked confused. "Well what happens after your due date?" I told her not to expect a baby before July.

[Beauchamp]

Originally Posted by notyetamommy

I said the 2-4 week thing to someone recently and she gave me the most confused look, lol!

I've done this, too, given people the "window" concept...somewhere between June 8-18. But usually they don't like that and continue to press me with something like, "but what is your due date?" They just us to nail down THE ONE DAY that our baby will be born.

[KarlaC]

Bumping to add one. Fil called today to 'check up on me'(and be nosey in general) as he has been every other week since dh deployed.

He asked what I was having for dinner & when I said salad he proceeded to gripe at me that my lo was breech because I don't 'feed him enough' by eating salad.