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November ***Pregnancy after Loss and Infertility*** - Page 9

post #161 of 269
I've got the flu or something awful like that, and it's scaring me. Yesterday I was all thrilled b/c I threw up, thinking it was morning sickness (at 11 weeks! a new record!) but I think now it was just this illness, I keep throwing up phlegm. (sorry.) The sickness is masking any preggo symptoms and I feel totally out of touch, if you know what I mean. I'm just suddenly overtaken with the feeling that maybe I've lost this one too and I don't know why.
post #162 of 269
Quote:
Originally Posted by WeasleyMum View Post
I've got the flu or something awful like that, and it's scaring me. Yesterday I was all thrilled b/c I threw up, thinking it was morning sickness (at 11 weeks! a new record!) but I think now it was just this illness, I keep throwing up phlegm. (sorry.) The sickness is masking any preggo symptoms and I feel totally out of touch, if you know what I mean. I'm just suddenly overtaken with the feeling that maybe I've lost this one too and I don't know why.
I'm sorry you are sick. And I'm so terribly sorry you are having a hard time. You are in my thoughts.
post #163 of 269
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by WeasleyMum View Post
I've got the flu or something awful like that, and it's scaring me. Yesterday I was all thrilled b/c I threw up, thinking it was morning sickness (at 11 weeks! a new record!) but I think now it was just this illness, I keep throwing up phlegm. (sorry.) The sickness is masking any preggo symptoms and I feel totally out of touch, if you know what I mean. I'm just suddenly overtaken with the feeling that maybe I've lost this one too and I don't know why.
I had a bad cold a few weeks ago, and it was awful. I know what you mean about masking the symptoms because I just felt crummy. You are in my thoughts...take care of yourself.
post #164 of 269
WeasleyMum - I hope you're feeling better soon and that baby's a-OK in there.
post #165 of 269
Thanks you guys. Sorry for the freak-out. I'm thinking that hormones + fever = bad combination. I'm still worried as heck, mainly because my symptoms have let up considerably, I think. Or at least, they're so masked by being sick that it's hard to tell. I felt really positive on Thursday because I threw up (yes I'm still in that yay!-morning-sickness! phase) for the first time in awhile, but when it became apparent on Friday that I was ill, I realized it was probably the beginning of that, instead. So all the nausea, the constant bad taste in my mouth, and etc I can no longer attribute to pregnancy. I have my 12-week ultrasound (the fancy one) on Wednesday, and I'm so freaked out about it that I'm losing sleep. I'm so afraid that they'll look in there and the baby will be dead... I can't lose another one, I just can't. And all of my others were earlier (well I miscarried one at exactly 12 weeks but the embryo had died awhile prior) so I'm freaked about miscarrying this late... I had decided before this pregnancy that if I was ever offered the choice between another natural m/c and a d&c I'd go for the surgery because the last miscarriage sort of went "wrong" and was very bad. (I thought after three I'd seen it all but I guess they're kind of like births: every one is different.) And I'm scared of that, too. And I've already built myself up, I've been fantasizing about telling my family on Thanksgiving that not only were we pregnant again but that we were second-trimester-pregnant for the first time ever! I've been keeping it a secret because they worry about me so much. And about updating my blog, where I've been keeping this a secret, with ultrasound pictures, and even (evil) fantasies about telling my boss at work, since another coworker is pregnant too about six weeks ahead of me-- two preggo associates out of only 9 total, it'll be a nightmare (for her).

I think I'm freaking out because I started out so calm and blase-- my mantra was, this is more likely to be miscarriage # 5 than baby # 1-- but it's getting so serious, everything has been going so much better than it ever did before, that it wore down my protective barrier and I'm all in, I can't help it.
post #166 of 269
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by WeasleyMum View Post
Thanks you guys. Sorry for the freak-out. I'm thinking that hormones + fever = bad combination. I'm still worried as heck, mainly because my symptoms have let up considerably, I think. Or at least, they're so masked by being sick that it's hard to tell. I felt really positive on Thursday because I threw up (yes I'm still in that yay!-morning-sickness! phase) for the first time in awhile, but when it became apparent on Friday that I was ill, I realized it was probably the beginning of that, instead. So all the nausea, the constant bad taste in my mouth, and etc I can no longer attribute to pregnancy. I have my 12-week ultrasound (the fancy one) on Wednesday, and I'm so freaked out about it that I'm losing sleep. I'm so afraid that they'll look in there and the baby will be dead... I can't lose another one, I just can't. And all of my others were earlier (well I miscarried one at exactly 12 weeks but the embryo had died awhile prior) so I'm freaked about miscarrying this late... I had decided before this pregnancy that if I was ever offered the choice between another natural m/c and a d&c I'd go for the surgery because the last miscarriage sort of went "wrong" and was very bad. (I thought after three I'd seen it all but I guess they're kind of like births: every one is different.) And I'm scared of that, too. And I've already built myself up, I've been fantasizing about telling my family on Thanksgiving that not only were we pregnant again but that we were second-trimester-pregnant for the first time ever! I've been keeping it a secret because they worry about me so much. And about updating my blog, where I've been keeping this a secret, with ultrasound pictures, and even (evil) fantasies about telling my boss at work, since another coworker is pregnant too about six weeks ahead of me-- two preggo associates out of only 9 total, it'll be a nightmare (for her).

I think I'm freaking out because I started out so calm and blase-- my mantra was, this is more likely to be miscarriage # 5 than baby # 1-- but it's getting so serious, everything has been going so much better than it ever did before, that it wore down my protective barrier and I'm all in, I can't help it.
I really hope that you see a nice strong baby on Wednesday.
post #167 of 269
Quote:
Originally Posted by WeasleyMum View Post
Thanks you guys. Sorry for the freak-out. I'm thinking that hormones + fever = bad combination. I'm still worried as heck, mainly because my symptoms have let up considerably, I think. Or at least, they're so masked by being sick that it's hard to tell. I felt really positive on Thursday because I threw up (yes I'm still in that yay!-morning-sickness! phase) for the first time in awhile, but when it became apparent on Friday that I was ill, I realized it was probably the beginning of that, instead. So all the nausea, the constant bad taste in my mouth, and etc I can no longer attribute to pregnancy. I have my 12-week ultrasound (the fancy one) on Wednesday, and I'm so freaked out about it that I'm losing sleep. I'm so afraid that they'll look in there and the baby will be dead... I can't lose another one, I just can't. And all of my others were earlier (well I miscarried one at exactly 12 weeks but the embryo had died awhile prior) so I'm freaked about miscarrying this late... I had decided before this pregnancy that if I was ever offered the choice between another natural m/c and a d&c I'd go for the surgery because the last miscarriage sort of went "wrong" and was very bad. (I thought after three I'd seen it all but I guess they're kind of like births: every one is different.) And I'm scared of that, too. And I've already built myself up, I've been fantasizing about telling my family on Thanksgiving that not only were we pregnant again but that we were second-trimester-pregnant for the first time ever! I've been keeping it a secret because they worry about me so much. And about updating my blog, where I've been keeping this a secret, with ultrasound pictures, and even (evil) fantasies about telling my boss at work, since another coworker is pregnant too about six weeks ahead of me-- two preggo associates out of only 9 total, it'll be a nightmare (for her).

I think I'm freaking out because I started out so calm and blase-- my mantra was, this is more likely to be miscarriage # 5 than baby # 1-- but it's getting so serious, everything has been going so much better than it ever did before, that it wore down my protective barrier and I'm all in, I can't help it.
I'm so sorry you are going through all this. I will be praying that Wednesday brings you peace. You're in my thoughts
post #168 of 269
Quote:
Originally Posted by WeasleyMum View Post
Thanks you guys. Sorry for the freak-out. I'm thinking that hormones + fever = bad combination. I'm still worried as heck, mainly because my symptoms have let up considerably, I think. Or at least, they're so masked by being sick that it's hard to tell. I felt really positive on Thursday because I threw up (yes I'm still in that yay!-morning-sickness! phase) for the first time in awhile, but when it became apparent on Friday that I was ill, I realized it was probably the beginning of that, instead. So all the nausea, the constant bad taste in my mouth, and etc I can no longer attribute to pregnancy. I have my 12-week ultrasound (the fancy one) on Wednesday, and I'm so freaked out about it that I'm losing sleep. I'm so afraid that they'll look in there and the baby will be dead... I can't lose another one, I just can't. And all of my others were earlier (well I miscarried one at exactly 12 weeks but the embryo had died awhile prior) so I'm freaked about miscarrying this late... I had decided before this pregnancy that if I was ever offered the choice between another natural m/c and a d&c I'd go for the surgery because the last miscarriage sort of went "wrong" and was very bad. (I thought after three I'd seen it all but I guess they're kind of like births: every one is different.) And I'm scared of that, too. And I've already built myself up, I've been fantasizing about telling my family on Thanksgiving that not only were we pregnant again but that we were second-trimester-pregnant for the first time ever! I've been keeping it a secret because they worry about me so much. And about updating my blog, where I've been keeping this a secret, with ultrasound pictures, and even (evil) fantasies about telling my boss at work, since another coworker is pregnant too about six weeks ahead of me-- two preggo associates out of only 9 total, it'll be a nightmare (for her).

I think I'm freaking out because I started out so calm and blase-- my mantra was, this is more likely to be miscarriage # 5 than baby # 1-- but it's getting so serious, everything has been going so much better than it ever did before, that it wore down my protective barrier and I'm all in, I can't help it.
I'm so sorry you are dealing with all this, and being sick as well! I've only had one miscarriage, so no comparison, but I feel very similar to you. I started out very "well we'll see" but its hard after this long to not start thinking ahead and planning and wanting to tell parents, etc. I have the big u/s at the end of this week as well (ill be 11wks 5days) and haven't had anything to tell me that it might not be the same result as last time (missed m/c) and I was *really* hoping that if I miscarried this time I'd at least not 'miss' it for this long, but as its approaching I am so so nervous. I was more joking before about being sedated for it, but now its seeming like a better and better idea!
post #169 of 269
WeasleyMum - I am so sorry you are sick right now. I am sending all the positive energy I have for Wednesday!

I understand your concerns as I start to get more attached to this pg I then realize how much worse a mc would be this far along. Here is hoping we both get to meet our babies in early June.
post #170 of 269
Thanks you guys. I'm feeling a little less psychotic today. And today's nausea really does seem pregnancy-induced. So we'll see. Two more days.
post #171 of 269
11 weeks today!

Sorry, just had to say that
post #172 of 269
WeasleyMum - I think it's nearly impossible not to get at least somewhat attached after so many weeks of hoping and puking. for Wednesday and the best good news!

seafox - Hoping for a good Friday for you, too!

Quote:
Originally Posted by sunflwrmoonbeam View Post
11 weeks today!
Woohoo! :

I'm 11w2d. Furthest I've ever made it with no bleeding. Checking for heartbeat on Thursday. No whammies!
post #173 of 269
WeasleyMum-- my heart totally goes out to you and I am trying to send the most positive, good vibes to you for your u/s to go GREAT!!! I know what you mean, I think, about getting attached after being so rational and realistic for so many weeks--I seem to have gotten that way in the past week or two as well.
post #174 of 269
Quote:
Originally Posted by WeasleyMum View Post
Thanks you guys. I'm feeling a little less psychotic today. And today's nausea really does seem pregnancy-induced. So we'll see. Two more days.
: WeasleyMun!!! I am crossing everything I can everything will be a-ok on Wendesday.

Ashely - congrats on 11 weeks! :

heatherh - congrats on your new milestone :

We are 12 weeks today and we go for out NT scan on Wednesday and I really hope the hematoma is shrinking or disappeared. M hasn't had any bleeding, so far everything is good on her end, she is still taking it easy, I think that must be driving her nuts with a toddler. Hopefully she can venture back out into the world after Wednesday. She is really hoping they will tell her to stop her progesterone shots and I can see why! They sound awful.
post #175 of 269
I woke this morning completely rattled..thinking something is wrong w/the baby. I have such mixed feelings about this pregnancy as it is and now throw in this extreme worry that something's wrong and the guilt that I haven't been more accepting. I'm just an absolute mess. Part of me wants to try to get in for an u/s but the other part does not want to go in because I'm terrified of bad news..again.
post #176 of 269
Quote:
Originally Posted by Critty View Post
We are 12 weeks today and we go for out NT scan on Wednesday and I really hope the hematoma is shrinking or disappeared. M hasn't had any bleeding, so far everything is good on her end, she is still taking it easy, I think that must be driving her nuts with a toddler. Hopefully she can venture back out into the world after Wednesday. She is really hoping they will tell her to stop her progesterone shots and I can see why! They sound awful.
Yay for 12 weeks! I hope Wednesday's appt goes wonderfully well. :

Quote:
Originally Posted by Amy&4girls View Post
I woke this morning completely rattled..thinking something is wrong w/the baby. I have such mixed feelings about this pregnancy as it is and now throw in this extreme worry that something's wrong and the guilt that I haven't been more accepting. I'm just an absolute mess. Part of me wants to try to get in for an u/s but the other part does not want to go in because I'm terrified of bad news..again.
Amy. I know how it is to go along and everything seems OK, then suddenly be gripped with the idea that there's something wrong. It's terrible.

I've just been diagnosed with Group B Strep, and am trying to research. Anybody been here before?
post #177 of 269
Critty - Woohooo for 12 weeks!

Amy&4girls - I hope you're able to relax a little today.
post #178 of 269
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Critty View Post
We are 12 weeks today and we go for out NT scan on Wednesday and I really hope the hematoma is shrinking or disappeared. M hasn't had any bleeding, so far everything is good on her end, she is still taking it easy, I think that must be driving her nuts with a toddler. Hopefully she can venture back out into the world after Wednesday. She is really hoping they will tell her to stop her progesterone shots and I can see why! They sound awful.
: Good luck at the appt!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Amy&4girls View Post
I woke this morning completely rattled..thinking something is wrong w/the baby. I have such mixed feelings about this pregnancy as it is and now throw in this extreme worry that something's wrong and the guilt that I haven't been more accepting. I'm just an absolute mess. Part of me wants to try to get in for an u/s but the other part does not want to go in because I'm terrified of bad news..again.
Thinking of you!

Quote:
Originally Posted by WeasleyMum View Post
I've just been diagnosed with Group B Strep, and am trying to research. Anybody been here before?
Sorry, I have not heard of anyone being tested for it or having high results in early pregnancy. Numerous friends have had high results before their birth. I assume they will treat you the same way, with antibiotics. Let us know what you find.

me: I have not been on much or updating much because I just feel so crummy. I actually started feeling a little better these last few days, which has me terrified. I keep checking for blood or other loss of symptoms. I am still exhausted, so it is only the nausea that is less. I am still terrified.
post #179 of 269
Thank you both. This fear is just paralyzing.
post #180 of 269

I think I made a mistake....

So, I bought one of the ridiculously cheap Britax carseats at Target. It's the first "the baby's coming" thing that I've done and it has sent me totally into the future, into hope, into dreaming about my baby. Oh no.

I'm getting close to my first m/c timeline (started at 10w5d and I'm 10w4d today) and I realize that I've been using that mark as THE mark, you know? I go to the m/w for a doppler on Thursday (10w6d) and I realize I'm absolutely shaking with anticipation. I'm soooo nervous, and yet starting to relax at the same time, which in turn makes me really anxious.

ACK!
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