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November ***Pregnancy after Loss and Infertility*** - Page 2

post #21 of 269
Sounds like many of us are in the boat. I keep having feelings that I will ended up no heartbeat, but pregnancy keeps going, and I will not find out until later on. As much as I would love to see my doctor now, I know there is nothing that can be done. So, I am enjoying my pregnancy, and having faith that the Lord will give me a healthy baby in June.... Few more weeks, and I can hear the heartbeat on the doppler....
post #22 of 269
i had an us today. The news is not great. I should be over 6weeks. ALl she was able to find was a sac, no embryo, nothing.
So now I have to wait and see.
It could be a blighted ovum. She drew blood to check my levels and will do another on Wed. If my numbers don't increase, there's little chance that there is a baby in there. If they do increase, I go back for another u/s in 7-10 days.
I just don't know how i am going to make it until Thursday when we find out the blood test results, I really don't. I have a really bad feeling about this but all we can do at this point is wait.
post #23 of 269
Quote:
Originally Posted by BlissfullyLoving View Post
Yeah, right about then I would be considering meds.
Yeah, I agree. If I were puking that many times every day - and especially at night, I would definitely at least consider it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by no5no5 View Post
And then, of course, I think that I'm an idiot for getting my hopes up.
I keep thinking the same thing! About myself... you know.

sunflwrmoonbeam, I am so sorry you're feeling so awful and the darned husband won't bring you a cheeseburger! What's his hold up? If you're barfing either way, why not eat something that at least sounds good? Even if the food doesn't stay down, you'll get *some* nutrients in. Are you losing weight, too? For me, that would be an even bigger indicator that drugs might be worth considering. Also, I would think the spot could just be an angry cervix from all the puking... who knows. Lots of and I hope you feel better soon!

Quote:
Originally Posted by seafox View Post
One thing is weird, I have trouble sleeping at night sometimes and then I end up needing a nap in the afternoon. Its annoying - I like to sleep all in a row if I can, I guess. (not much of a napper) All week I would have been able to sleep for hours more in the AM, but this weekend I was just too awake bright and early. I think some of it might be hunger in the morning - the more I eat at night the longer I seem to sleep?
Maybe you could eat a little something right before bed (I'm fond of 1/2 a bagel or a yogurt) then keep a snack by the bed? If I do that, I can sleep past the initial hunger. If I go down to the kitchen for a snack, it's all over and I can't sleep.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Critty View Post
Seafox - your coach sounds like my trainer? "Are you gonna puke? No, then get back on the treadmill" Sometimes I want to learn how to puke on demand so I can puke on his foot

Well tomorrow is the start of Week 10 for us!!!
That made me laugh! Yeah for going on 10 weeks!

Quote:
Originally Posted by ktmama View Post
I know that eating sugar makes me want to puke and wears me out when I'm pg. Yet, every day I'm eating chocolate in order to feel sick to reassure myself that I'm still pg. INSANE!
I thought the definition of insane was doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results? So, nope, you're not insane. Just pg
post #24 of 269
Quote:
Originally Posted by MiracleMama View Post
i had an us today. The news is not great. I should be over 6weeks. ALl she was able to find was a sac, no embryo, nothing.
So now I have to wait and see.
It could be a blighted ovum. She drew blood to check my levels and will do another on Wed. If my numbers don't increase, there's little chance that there is a baby in there. If they do increase, I go back for another u/s in 7-10 days.
I just don't know how i am going to make it until Thursday when we find out the blood test results, I really don't. I have a really bad feeling about this but all we can do at this point is wait.


Is there any chance at all your dates are off? That could absolutely explain seeing only a sac. I'm sorry you have to wait so long for the bloodwork results. I've had mine same-day. The wait would be impossible for me as well.

Lots of sticky baby vibes coming your way. Hang in there, mama!
post #25 of 269
MiracleMama - I've been there. Thinking all the positive thoughts I can for you. The waiting is so hard. Did they do a transvaginal u/s - that would show more than a transabdominal.
post #26 of 269
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by sunflwrmoonbeam View Post
Well, I'm currently barfing about 3 or 4 times a day, a few times in the middle of the night. It doesn't matter what I eat or how much I eat, and there seems to be no definitive pattern. I'm as likely to barf water as I am a cheeseburger (which I really want right now. And DH is being a jerk and not going to get me one). Plus, vomiting is coming with heartburn and stomach pain, and then the spitting blood thing.

I know it's not hyperemesis, but it seems excessive. I'm concerned that I'm barely eating/keeping any food down at all.

And I so want a cheeseburger and fries
I hope you got your cheeseburger, and it stayed down.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Critty View Post
Bliss - try to think positive thoughts, to keep your thoughts focuses in a positive frame of mind. I know it is next to impossible sometimes, but we are all rooting for you too

Well tomorrow is the start of Week 10 for us!!! That makes me feel really optimistic! We go for another u/s on Friday morning. On the weekend there is a Baby and Toddler Show going on, so I think we will go to check out the baby gear. There are going to be a lot of independent, smaller stores, so hopefully we can find some of the things we are looking at. We want to get the co-sleeper that attaches to the bed, we have a queen size bed so we are looking to side car the baby.

M is doing much better, she is not nearly as sick. I am worried what is going to happen when she stops taking her progesterone shots. I am sure everything will be fine, but it's just something that nags me a bit.
Thanks! : It is so hard sometimes.

Yay for week 10! : Glad M is feeling better...cannot wait to hear the update on Friday.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ktmama View Post
I know that eating sugar makes me want to puke and wears me out when I'm pg. Yet, every day I'm eating chocolate in order to feel sick to reassure myself that I'm still pg. INSANE!
If I had something that worked consistently like that I would probably do it too.

Quote:
Originally Posted by alisoninparis View Post
Hi I just wanted to chime in to make a correction: though I did post on the "Pregnant after IF" thread, we didn't do IF.
Quote:
Originally Posted by alisoninparis View Post
Oops I thought it meant IVF but in any case we didn't experience infertility. Sorry to have butted in!
I removed the infertility from your name.

Quote:
Originally Posted by sunflwrmoonbeam View Post
As for me, last night I had a spot. Sorta. It was blood tinged (pink-red) mucus, a VERY small amount, which of course set off a full blown panic attack. Really, can you blame me? But, about 20 minutes after I had the spot I barfed, and i have no cramps, and I got up 3 times to pee last night, and all bleeding has stopped. Pretty sure I'm fine, and not calling the doctor. I've already had 2 great ultrasounds so I'm sure it's all good.

Still scary though.
I understand. I had a little bit of brown tinged cm that had me panicked. The dr at the ultrasound even told me to expect a little bit because I had some free floating blood in my uterus from implantation.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kwgrlup View Post
Sounds like many of us are in the boat. I keep having feelings that I will ended up no heartbeat, but pregnancy keeps going, and I will not find out until later on. As much as I would love to see my doctor now, I know there is nothing that can be done. So, I am enjoying my pregnancy, and having faith that the Lord will give me a healthy baby in June.... Few more weeks, and I can hear the heartbeat on the doppler....
That is a great outlook to have.

me: Still paranoid. We go to the see the cnm on next Tuesday, and I am very hopeful we will hear the heartbeat with the doppler. If not, I will probably schedule another ultrasound for that week. I was looking up the rates of missed miscarriages, and all I could find is that it was about 1% of miscarriages. That makes me feel confident that it is very unlikely that the baby died and my body would not give me any signs.

Today I am feeling awful, so that is a good sign. I woke up with horrible nausea in the middle of the night. Today I have diarrhea, and I feel awful.

MiracleMama, I did not see your post until after I posted. Hoping the very best for you! You are in my thoughts.
post #27 of 269
Quote:
Originally Posted by MiracleMama View Post
i had an us today. The news is not great. I should be over 6weeks. ALl she was able to find was a sac, no embryo, nothing.
So now I have to wait and see.
It could be a blighted ovum. She drew blood to check my levels and will do another on Wed. If my numbers don't increase, there's little chance that there is a baby in there. If they do increase, I go back for another u/s in 7-10 days.
I just don't know how i am going to make it until Thursday when we find out the blood test results, I really don't. I have a really bad feeling about this but all we can do at this point is wait.
I'm so sorry. 6 weeks is too early to be sure, though, especially if you haven't done a beta yet or are at all unsure about when you ovulated. I will : for your betas to be nice & low (to explain the ultrasound) and going up fast.
post #28 of 269
I am barely nauseous at all. And I noticed last night that (I think) I am peeing less. DH & I got into a huge fight about it. His opinion was that I was being obsessive & psychotic (don't worry, he didn't say that out loud) and my opinion was that he should be able to pretend that he doesn't notice that I am being obsessive & psychotic and have some empathy for his crazy pregnant wife. My poor DH.

Seriously, though, I am back in deep. I feel totally positive that there will be no heartbeat tomorrow. I am worried that the OB will convince me to have an ultrasound...it's easy enough to be firm when all it takes to not get an ultrasound is to go about my daily business without calling & scheduling one. Not getting an ultrasound when an OB is right there telling me I'm an idiot for not getting one is something altogether different. Maybe it would be worth it to put me out of my misery. But seriously, I can't have an ultrasound without DH there. There is no way I will be able to drive home after that.
post #29 of 269
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by no5no5 View Post
I am barely nauseous at all. And I noticed last night that (I think) I am peeing less. DH & I got into a huge fight about it. His opinion was that I was being obsessive & psychotic (don't worry, he didn't say that out loud) and my opinion was that he should be able to pretend that he doesn't notice that I am being obsessive & psychotic and have some empathy for his crazy pregnant wife. My poor DH.

Seriously, though, I am back in deep. I feel totally positive that there will be no heartbeat tomorrow. I am worried that the OB will convince me to have an ultrasound...it's easy enough to be firm when all it takes to not get an ultrasound is to go about my daily business without calling & scheduling one. Not getting an ultrasound when an OB is right there telling me I'm an idiot for not getting one is something altogether different. Maybe it would be worth it to put me out of my misery. But seriously, I can't have an ultrasound without DH there. There is no way I will be able to drive home after that.
You are in my thoughts!
post #30 of 269
Quote:
Originally Posted by no5no5 View Post
I am barely nauseous at all. And I noticed last night that (I think) I am peeing less. DH & I got into a huge fight about it. His opinion was that I was being obsessive & psychotic (don't worry, he didn't say that out loud) and my opinion was that he should be able to pretend that he doesn't notice that I am being obsessive & psychotic and have some empathy for his crazy pregnant wife. My poor DH.

Seriously, though, I am back in deep. I feel totally positive that there will be no heartbeat tomorrow. I am worried that the OB will convince me to have an ultrasound...it's easy enough to be firm when all it takes to not get an ultrasound is to go about my daily business without calling & scheduling one. Not getting an ultrasound when an OB is right there telling me I'm an idiot for not getting one is something altogether different. Maybe it would be worth it to put me out of my misery. But seriously, I can't have an ultrasound without DH there. There is no way I will be able to drive home after that.

I've had no increase in peeing at all. The nausea comes in waves. It's just impossible to know the viability of a pregnancy based on symptoms alone.

You are in my thoughts. I hope your visit goes well tomorrow and you do what you need to do to resolve the uncertainty. Is there any way your DH could manage to be at the visit with you?
post #31 of 269
Quote:
Did they do a transvaginal u/s - that would show more than a transabdominal.
it was a transvaginal us. and i am 99.9% sure of the day i ovulated.
post #32 of 269
Quote:
Originally Posted by BlissfullyLoving View Post
me: Still paranoid. We go to the see the cnm on next Tuesday, and I am very hopeful we will hear the heartbeat with the doppler. If not, I will probably schedule another ultrasound for that week. I was looking up the rates of missed miscarriages, and all I could find is that it was about 1% of miscarriages. That makes me feel confident that it is very unlikely that the baby died and my body would not give me any signs.

Today I am feeling awful, so that is a good sign. I woke up with horrible nausea in the middle of the night. Today I have diarrhea, and I feel awful.

MiracleMama, I did not see your post until after I posted. Hoping the very best for you! You are in my thoughts.
I have seen that stat too, 1%, although just from talking to people I feel like it has to be *much* higher than that. I was really surprised to read that when I did, just cause the tech who gave me the bad news after the u/s said that it had happened three! other times that day, and just from reading the PAL forums it seems like its more than that. I know some of it is folks getting earlier and earlier u/s so if it normally took a week for your body to 'process' you aren't giving it that chance, but in my case my body had 4 weeks, so I am hoping *that* case is at least in the 1% range.

one of the reasons I decided to wait for the later u/s is just that, it seemed unlikely that I'd have my body miss the boat so badly *twice* in a row like that, but I don't know if its something that repeats among people due to certain predispositions either.

my ob/gyn said the two times I saw her, when I expressed concern/worry, 'well you aren't bleeding, right? no spotting? etc?' but that's is just no comfort after last time!

though I have to say, my body did sort of let me know, I just didn't realize since it was my first pregnancy. Starting week 6 I had a small amount of nausea and fatigue (nothing like this time, it was mostly the heartburn after digesting) and it all disappeared by week 7. And I was able to do a 130mi bike ride in week 10. (plus some 90milers training for it) I just assumed I was one of the lucky ones w/out nausea or fatigue lasting too long! Not so much.

Now, I wake up every morning trying to gauge the queasiness. Sadly, some days its worse than others so I freak out but its always there in some way. So I hope like you that I'd get a sign at least w/ symptom loss.

my u/s is in two and half weeks or so. I am so nervous, since I really really don't want to hear bad news that way again. I had some pretty tough m/c dreams last night, so realistic I almost told the mr. when I woke up at 4am that I bled in the middle of the night in the bathroom until I really thought hard about it and realized I hadn't, it was just a dream. I didn't sleep well last night after that! Could use a nap about now.
post #33 of 269
Quote:
Originally Posted by Voltige View Post
I've had no increase in peeing at all. The nausea comes in waves. It's just impossible to know the viability of a pregnancy based on symptoms alone.

You are in my thoughts. I hope your visit goes well tomorrow and you do what you need to do to resolve the uncertainty. Is there any way your DH could manage to be at the visit with you?
Really? Hm. I've been peeing way, way, more, right from the beginning. But I am poorly hydrated and don't pee much at all when I'm not pregnant. So maybe that's why the difference is so obvious for me? Anyway, it _did_ occur to me that I might have just gotten used to going to the bathroom so often that it seems normal now. Who knows. I do need to pee right now...sorry if that's tmi.

No way DH can come. He is actually seeing patients in the clinic tomorrow, so he would have to cancel all of their appointments, etc. He does have Wednesday "off" but he will probably be working all day then too. : I liked it so much more when he was an artist & a musician.
post #34 of 269
Quote:
Originally Posted by no5no5 View Post
Really? Hm. I've been peeing way, way, more, right from the beginning. But I am poorly hydrated and don't pee much at all when I'm not pregnant. So maybe that's why the difference is so obvious for me? Anyway, it _did_ occur to me that I might have just gotten used to going to the bathroom so often that it seems normal now. Who knows. I do need to pee right now...sorry if that's tmi.
Really. If I were going on symptoms alone I would not know I'm pregnant. No excessive peeing, nausea that can be entirely explained by my recent gall bladder issues, and tender breasts that come and go with my normal cycle. However, I am having a micromanaged first trimester and I've had u/s nearly every week, starting the entire cycle I ovulated in. I've SEEN a developing embryo, sac, yolk sac, embryo, and then heartbeat. Every week I'm still worried that it won't be there. I think it's just completely normal to be scared ****less, honestly, after going through so much to get pregnant, or going through losses before. I was never this paranoid with my first pregnancy.

What time is your appt tomorrow? I'll send some good vibes your way!
post #35 of 269
Quote:
Originally Posted by Voltige View Post
Really. If I were going on symptoms alone I would not know I'm pregnant. No excessive peeing, nausea that can be entirely explained by my recent gall bladder issues, and tender breasts that come and go with my normal cycle. However, I am having a micromanaged first trimester and I've had u/s nearly every week, starting the entire cycle I ovulated in. I've SEEN a developing embryo, sac, yolk sac, embryo, and then heartbeat. Every week I'm still worried that it won't be there. I think it's just completely normal to be scared ****less, honestly, after going through so much to get pregnant, or going through losses before. I was never this paranoid with my first pregnancy.

What time is your appt tomorrow? I'll send some good vibes your way!
When I was pregnant with DD, I had never even heard of missed miscarriage. So every time I wiped & there wasn't blood, I totally assumed everything was fine. How naive I was back then.

2:20 EST. It'll probably be 4 or later before I can get on here to post, though. I will post no matter how the appointment goes. You guys are such a great support group.
post #36 of 269
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by seafox View Post
I have seen that stat too, 1%, although just from talking to people I feel like it has to be *much* higher than that. I was really surprised to read that when I did, just cause the tech who gave me the bad news after the u/s said that it had happened three! other times that day, and just from reading the PAL forums it seems like its more than that. I know some of it is folks getting earlier and earlier u/s so if it normally took a week for your body to 'process' you aren't giving it that chance, but in my case my body had 4 weeks, so I am hoping *that* case is at least in the 1% range.

one of the reasons I decided to wait for the later u/s is just that, it seemed unlikely that I'd have my body miss the boat so badly *twice* in a row like that, but I don't know if its something that repeats among people due to certain predispositions either.

my ob/gyn said the two times I saw her, when I expressed concern/worry, 'well you aren't bleeding, right? no spotting? etc?' but that's is just no comfort after last time!

though I have to say, my body did sort of let me know, I just didn't realize since it was my first pregnancy. Starting week 6 I had a small amount of nausea and fatigue (nothing like this time, it was mostly the heartburn after digesting) and it all disappeared by week 7. And I was able to do a 130mi bike ride in week 10. (plus some 90milers training for it) I just assumed I was one of the lucky ones w/out nausea or fatigue lasting too long! Not so much.

Now, I wake up every morning trying to gauge the queasiness. Sadly, some days its worse than others so I freak out but its always there in some way. So I hope like you that I'd get a sign at least w/ symptom loss.

my u/s is in two and half weeks or so. I am so nervous, since I really really don't want to hear bad news that way again. I had some pretty tough m/c dreams last night, so realistic I almost told the mr. when I woke up at 4am that I bled in the middle of the night in the bathroom until I really thought hard about it and realized I hadn't, it was just a dream. I didn't sleep well last night after that! Could use a nap about now.
I am so sorry about the bad dreams. Those are the worst.
post #37 of 269
nono:

miraclemama

I got the cheeseburger, and it didn't stay down I'm still having pink cm today which is scaring me and i'm trying desperately not to panic. There's no other sign that anything is wrong, and i had a great u/s last Thursday.
post #38 of 269
Quote:
Originally Posted by no5no5 View Post
When I was pregnant with DD, I had never even heard of missed miscarriage. So every time I wiped & there wasn't blood, I totally assumed everything was fine. How naive I was back then.

2:20 EST. It'll probably be 4 or later before I can get on here to post, though. I will post no matter how the appointment goes. You guys are such a great support group.
yeah, I hadn't heard of it either, that's why that first u/s was *such* a shock. The mr. actually fainted. We had no idea that kind of thing could happen. I figured, no blood, no issues. I actually miss that naivete, honestly! It'd be a nice change from the paranoia I have right now!

good luck w/ your appt!
post #39 of 269
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by seafox View Post
I actually miss that naivete, honestly! It'd be a nice change from the paranoia I have right now!
I have a secret wish that I was one of those women that does not realize she is pregnant until like 8+ weeks. (Actually now that I am 8.5, I would be happier finding out closer to 12 weeks. ) Then I would bypass so much of the paranoia!
post #40 of 269
, guys.

no5no5 - Give DH the benefit of the doubt. I know it sucks to be my DH right now, so I'm assuming yours is in a similarly crappy position Make sure he knows exactly when and where your appt is *just in case* someone cancels or he is otherwise freed up. I am hoping with every bone in my body that you get a HB tomorrow. I totally know what you mean about u/s without DH. I will never be able to do one alone after the last 2 times. shudder.

MiracleMama - Also hoping and hoping things are OK with you. Lots more

I think the 1% missed m/c is BS. I know we see more because we're hanging out on this board, but I just have no faith in that 1% number. I, too, wonder if it's a byproduct of more u/s and early monitoring.

I think the fact that HCPs ask about spotting leads us to believe that no spotting = no trouble. My first m/c I had bleeding around 6+ weeks and figured I hadn't m/c so I was probably OK. NOBODY bothered to tell me otherwise. They just let me go on thinking as long as I was pg, it was prob OK.

Quote:
Originally Posted by sunflwrmoonbeam View Post
I got the cheeseburger, and it didn't stay down I'm still having pink cm today which is scaring me and i'm trying desperately not to panic. There's no other sign that anything is wrong, and i had a great u/s last Thursday.
Thinking lots of positive thoughts for you, too. I hope the cheeseburger at least tasted good.
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