back to work?

[moderngal]

anyone back to work yet? or going back soon?
how are you feeling? how's pumping going?

[truffle]

I went back today, starting off slow. Still trying to get a supply in the freezer, I have about a weeks worth, I really need to get pumping.

I too baby with me today though, and got a lot more done than I expected.

Next week my friend will be visiting and offered to watch her while I work.

Hopefully by the time her long-term caregiver is in town I'll have a better freezer supply.

[emski4379]

I started back last week, but I work from home.

[VeganCupcake]

Originally Posted by emski4379

I started back last week, but I work from home.

I work from home, too. I started back several weeks ago, but still on a limited basis. I've gone in to the office a few times, too, and taken Baby with me. She sleeps in the sling quite happily while I'm there. Not bad so far!

[moderngal]

I go back next week. I'm starting off slow, but I do work full time and it's a fairly demanding job so I don't think the slow start can last.
And my freezer supply isn't very good yet. I need to work on that.

[triana1326]

I started last week. I hate it. I cry every day when I leave for work, call three or four times throughout the day, pump in a little room inside the women's bathroom (I can hear and smell people going to the bathroom and then drive home as fast as possible because I'm so upset. Sara still isn't taking to the bottle and screams bloody murder for about 1/2 hour before she'll drink anything from it - we've tried four different nipples and bottles, different positions and presentations. She hates it and so do I. I don't like my job because it's rather mindless and doesn't give me any personal satisfaction or even match my beliefs (I proofread orders for cheap plastic crap from overseas), and the only reason I'm working for for a paycheck, which is not a big enough reason (in my unreasonable mommy-head) to justify leaving her every day.

Can you tell I'm miserable? I'm holding out some hope - they're instituting a paperless system that should be up and running after Christmas that may allow me to work from home. :

[stephck]

I go back to 12 hour shifts mid-december and I have no desire to go at all but my salary and benefits are essential for us, so oh well. I've told my husband he must win the lotto to get me out of it.

[tjjazzy]

i'm hoping to get started back soon (freelance writing) but i'm not sure we're all settled yet. if i had a regular job, i'd not be back at it for a year (we get one year maternity leave here) but i don't think i should wait that long to get back into the swing of things. getting into the writing world is hard enough without taking too long off!

[mynetname]

I was getting calls while in hospital from work so I guess I have not been off work yet...
Having a non-9-5 job makes it very different though so I can't compare. If I did have a "regular" job, as I have been told I do not , I don't know how I would organise things at all?
If I completely stopped, unfortunately so would my work--it is the type of thing where I can't stop for too long or my business/career per se goes elsewhere! We run our own business & I freelance as well so I can do certain things from home. However, she has nursed through 2 business meetings so far and if I am at work she is with me. My assistant asked me to show her how to change diapers so she can do it if I am busy I was told by another my baby is the unofficial mascot around here so she is much loved by everyone
Plus she goes into the rehearsal studio with me and falls asleep with the music so realistically I am having a blast working with baby.
I think if there are no hazards or dangerous work environment, there is a baby friendly space, clean, dry and safe, then why can't babies ideally be with their mommies/primary caregiver at work? (I only do short periods of work as I don't think she should be there all day either then we go home to do the rest).
I hope most work places should have child minding as part of the employment package or baby-friendly policies for new mommies. Maybe I am dreaming but does that exist? I certainly hope so.

[VeganCupcake]

mynetname, like you, I freelance, and do a lot of my work from home, though I have taken Baby Girl with me to various things. Yesterday we conducted a validation study of one of our products and I took her along in the Moby wrap. I introduced her to our research subjects as "my assistant" and they laughed and talked to her. She fell asleep after just a few minutes and was fine.

I do foresee a time, though, when she's older and more active, that this won't be possible anymore. I'm not sure what I'll do then.

I think parents would be a lot more effective at work and more satisfied with their job situations if their children were nearby and they were assured of quality childcare.

Triana, my little one won't take a bottle either when leave her with DH for an hour to go to the gym. I'm thinking about trying cup feeding.

[triana1326]

I'm just worried that this may be the proverbial straw that causes me to tip into PPD - I'm already on that edge. Today was especially hard - Sara saw me putting on my jacket and started crying. I'm sure that it was probably a coincedence, but I'm two hours into my shift and I'm still tearing up and really upset about it.
Everyone keeps telling me it'll get better and that it should be easier because I'm leaving her with my mom and not strangers at a day care. That does make it easier, but it still doesn't make it easier, KWIM? I feel like I'm betraying her and breaking her trust, that I'm destorying something sacred between us, and it hurts me so badly. It just breaks my heart every day to leave her and I can't stand the thought of her screaming for two hours at a time waiting for me to feed her and then having to settle for a bottle after she's literally exhausted herself crying for me. Any words of wisdom that can help me?

[VeganCupcake]

triana, you mentioned that paperless system that might allow you to work from home--is that still on track for after Christmas? Hold on to that, because Christmas is just 6 or 7 weeks away, and you and Sara can make it that long.

s

[mynetname]

Originally Posted by triana1326

I'm just worried that this may be the proverbial straw that causes me to tip into PPD - I'm already on that edge. Today was especially hard - Sara saw me putting on my jacket and started crying. I'm sure that it was probably a coincedence, but I'm two hours into my shift and I'm still tearing up and really upset about it.
Everyone keeps telling me it'll get better and that it should be easier because I'm leaving her with my mom and not strangers at a day care. That does make it easier, but it still doesn't make it easier, KWIM? I feel like I'm betraying her and breaking her trust, that I'm destorying something sacred between us, and it hurts me so badly. It just breaks my heart every day to leave her and I can't stand the thought of her screaming for two hours at a time waiting for me to feed her and then having to settle for a bottle after she's literally exhausted herself crying for me. Any words of wisdom that can help me?

You're a good mommy! Hang in there.

[lcaitlin]

going back first week of december and terrified about it. I'm planning to bring my baby with me, but haven't discussed that plan with any of my "bosses" yet. I work very independently and don't really report to anyone, so I'm hoping as long as I do my job well nobody will care. but that could be overly wishful thinking. I just hope baby enjoys our time in the office -- two afternoons a week to start...

I just left baby for the very first time ever today at 8.5 weeks. I was gone less than 90 minutes and that seemed to be too long for him. oh boy, hope it all works out.

[moderngal]

I'm back to work- very busy, too. I definitely missed working. I really like my job and my daycare situation, so I'm feeling good and more like myself.

Right now I'm pumping enough for her feedings. I'm taking fenugreek so that I can pump a little extra for the freezer.

[triana1326]

Originally Posted by VeganCupcake

triana, you mentioned that paperless system that might allow you to work from home--is that still on track for after Christmas? Hold on to that, because Christmas is just 6 or 7 weeks away, and you and Sara can make it that long.

s

Nope, it's apparently not going to happen in the sense that we'll all be working from home. According to my boss, that step will happen in a couple years. The system is going live after Christmas, but it'll take about a year just work out the kinks. Plus, there was another round of layoffs, so who knows about anything anymore...

[triana1326]

:So on Thursday my boss and the at-work nurse gave me an "intervention" of sorts. They've been really concerned that I'm missing so much work and that I don't seem to be myself anymore. It was suggested that I call the Employee Assistance hotline and talk to a counselor. Fat lot of good that did. I called and scheduled an appointment with a local counselor. I go to the appt. on Friday and find out she's a Christian counselor - I'm not Christian. Second, apparently she doesn't think that PPD is real, and dismissed everything I brought up as "hormonal" and that "leaving your baby will get easier, so just bear with it because it may take a few more months for you and Sara to adjust". She suggested looking for a new job. Yeah, like I need that kind of stress on top of everything else. Plus, the jobs I would apply for would take me away from Sara for more hours and farther away from our house. So, I'm just frustrated and tired and really discouraged. I just want to call up my boss and tell her that I'm not coming back to work, and to hell with all the bills and the rent and everything else...

Just needed to vent a bit...:

[lcaitlin]

this sounds really rough for you. I'm so sorry! if your job laid you off, would you get decent severance pay, or unemployment? sounds like they might be agreeable to some sort of deal like that since they suggested looking for a new job. if you could buy yourself a few more months at home with some severance, would that be doable at all?

[moderngal]

triana1326~ I am so sorry... if you think you are having PPD, please get help. it is real- and you need good help to get through it.