Best agencies for domestic newborn adoptions? Links, etc please!

[azmomtoone]

Hi, I'm just starting to gather info but looking to adopt a newborn, a little while back read a story of a mom who got her little girl at 2 days old (on here) ..... prior to that I really thought the babies were usually older before coming home...... I would much prefer to bring home a baby within a few days of being born, even if it means waiting longer to adopt.
We have a birth son who'll be 2 on the 30th; shortly after he was born we decided to adopt future children (and had talked about adoption long before he was around too but wanted 1 birthchild first....)

I would be open to any race, gender, twins, etc (provided that we're approved for it...... we live in a small 2 bedroom house and that's not changing anytime soon, so I'm thinking we may be *required* to adopt a boy so the two could share a room....but like I said we're just starting so I really don't know the rules) Just doubting a social worker is gonna accept *oh, we all sleep in bedroom A, bedroom B is the study / playroom.* (of course when they're teens they'll not want to sleep in ours....hopefully by that point we'll be able to go to something larger....)

anyway....

So what I'm looking for is links & contact info of any agencies that do nb adoptions, preferably from people who've used them; and why you chose that particular agency over others, etc.

ETA: I'd prefer closed adoption, or semi-open.... and by that I mean, I'd be ok w/ meeting birthmom/parents beforehand but prefer not to maintain a relationship w/ them after the adoption. Sorry if I'm using the terms incorrectly.

TIA!

[*Milk-Fairy*]

I guess I'm the poster whose adoption you read about here. Our baby girl is now 3.5 weeks old

We used The Gladney Center and went through their ABC program (African American and Biracial Children)

You are able to specify what ages you are comfortable with (we were accepting up to age 2), but cannot specify sex.

We chose this agency for a few reasons, but primarily because they are the only agency with a specific minority adoption program. This was important to us because we wanted to be around families that CHOSE this type of adoption, and the issues that are involved.

I'm happy to help answer any questions if I can-just pm me We had a fabulous experience, a very short wait (5 months), and are thoroughly enjoying our open adoption with the amazing young woman that chose our family.

eta: Gladney's adoptions are primarily semi-open...which was another reason we chose them...we knew we wanted full openness, and that our wait time would be shorter when placed in a pool of families that are not open. Small fish, big ocean...etc.

[queenjane]

Originally Posted by *Milk-Fairy*

We chose this agency for a few reasons, but primarily because they are the only agency with a specific minority adoption program.

Just to clarify....do you mean, in your area? Because i've found several agencies that have minority adoption programs (for example, Spence-Chapin, WACAP, The Cradle, etc. There are lots and lots online. ) I didnt want the OP to think that Gladney was the *only* agency that has such a program!

prior to that I really thought the babies were usually older before coming home

Maybe you are thinking of international adoption? Most babies are at least four months old (often closer to a year old) before coming home. But with domestic newborn adoption, most babies are "matched" with their potential adoptive families before birth, and the new adoptive parents take the baby home just as soon as they are cleared to leave the hospital after birth (sometimes within hours, usually a day or two, i think?) Some agencies utilize a private foster care program, with stay at home moms with no desire to adopt, and they keep the babies until the revocation period has passed, to reduce the risk that the potential adoptive parents will have a baby for days or weeks and then need to give the baby back if the mom changes her mind (this also helps the mom feel not so "guilty" that she is taking a baby back from a family and hurting them, and gives her space to think about her decision)...i can see the pros/cons to both situations. But i'd say the norm would be infants placed within the first week of life. Sometimes the private agencies will get in older babies or toddlers where the mom decides to place at that time rather than at birth, but thats a far rarer occurence.

I'd also encourage you to do alot of research on the benefits of more open adoption.


Katherine

[queenjane]

we live in a small 2 bedroom house and that's not changing anytime soon, so I'm thinking we may be *required* to adopt a boy so the two could share a room

I forgot to add that in general, with private newborn adoption you usually can't specify baby's gender (some agencies--most i think--dont allow it, and for those that do, you would probably be increasing your wait time dramatically)....but as far as bedroom space goes, i'm not sure how it works for private adoption, but i know with foster care adoption, there are certain rules in place...in my state children under 5 (or five and under, can't remember) can share a room with opposite gender child (and kids under 3 can share w/ a parent)...this varies by state....and its been my experience that the homestudy worker goes by your family situation at the time (meaning, she wouldnt say "well, where are you going to put the other child when they are teens and no longer sharing?!?")...though i bet that varies from worker to worker as well. But i dont think your bedroom situation will be a big issue, esp if you mention that when the kids are older you'll probably move to a bigger place. And many agencies are fine with the baby rooming in with you in the beginning anyway (not all are cosleeping friendly, but if you have a bassinet or crib in there for show, that will work.)


Katherine

[azmomtoone]

[QUOTE]homestudy worker goes by your family situation at the time (meaning, she wouldnt say "well, where are you going to put the other child when they are teens and no longer sharing?!?")...though i bet that varie, ss from worker to worker as well. But i dont think your bedroom situation will be a big issue, esp if you mention that when the kids are older you'll probably move to a bigger place. And many agencies are fine with the baby rooming in with you in the beginning anyway (not all are cosleeping friendly, but if you have a bassinet or crib in there for show, that will work.)[\QUOTE]

Well, that's definitely good to hear, both halves of it! I would rather not choose a gender, you don't get to choose if you get pregnant right? Just wasn't sure if we'd have to. And good to know that we can share a room if not a bed... makes it easier financially if we don't have to set up a whole nursery (we never had a crib; DS does have a toddler bed now, which we'd probably move him over to before a new baby comes, but that's a ways off.....right now we have both mattresses on the floor next to each other and he often chooses to sleep on his own, mostly 'cause he hates covers on him and gets annoyed when DH and I pull them up, so I'm thinking it shouldn't be too hard to transition him).

ANyway, I'm not sure what I was thinking of, international or foster adopt maybe? Admitting total ignorance, I guess I just had an image in my head of babies being at least a couple months old by the time paperwork gets completed and what not. But I do see that a lot of these agencies have you take the baby home as soon as their released from the hospital, which is great! We've sent off for info from 3 agencies, plus for foster-adopt info from the state dept, so we'll see what we get. Since we're still trying to choose, I'm still very interested in hearing personal success stories, what you liked about any specific agency, or any to stay away from.

milk-fairy .... yours probably is the story I read, w/ the blog w/ adorable pictures on it! ... which kinda inspired us to start looking more in depth into this stuff..... I think we're still a ways out yet but it takes awhile too I guess... and I want to take my time and make sure we make the right decisions for our family too....

[SundayCrepes]

Our adoption will be finalized this Saturday. We met our daughter at 6 hours of age and I immediately nursed her.

We did a private adoption. We were certified by an agency that does not do matches. They did do the post placement visits.

I did a lot of internet networking and education. adoption.com is more geared towards newborn adoption. We advertised with parentprofiles.com. We didn't get any responses there, but we were matched so quickly that there wasn't much chance to get responses.

We were certified on May 8. On June 17 we went online with parentprofiles. On August 5 I sent letters to 112 obstetricians around our state. On Aug. 10 one of the obs called me about a just born baby. She shared our information with the mom who chose us. As I said, we met her at 6 hours of age.

She is 3 months today. I am so excited for Saturday. We are finalizing at adoption day in the park.

We were very upfront with our social worker that we co-sleep--we had to be since we have a 2 year old and no bed for him. I also talked about nursing the baby as well as tandem nursing our son. It was important to us that the emom know that was our plan. We didn't feel it was fair to not be upfront. We knew there was a mom out there who wanted our style of parenting even though most people advised us to hide the fact that I would nurse since it might turn off a lot of moms. The social worker was initially worried about our lifestyle and asked if we had anything in writing she could read. We weren't offended and I gave her lots of really good resources. She certified us and is now going to stand in front of the judge and say she has seen us with the baby and she recommends adoption.

We wanted an open adoption, but the bmom is not wanting much contact right now. She did email us and we sent pictures. Personally, I think it is best for the baby to have some sort of contact, but we are letting the bmom initiate contact.

There are some really good agencies out there. There are also some that are nothing more than puppy mills that pressure the moms to place. Find out how many moms they work with in a year and how many place and how many don't. If most don't keep their babies, run from that agency. Adoption is big business. A healthy white baby can cost $40,000. Other races are cheaper. By going private, we paid $3,000 in attorney fees, $1,300 for classes and homestudy, and $600 for parent profiles. Oh, and $100 for postage and printer ink for ob letters. There is a tax credit of about $11,000 for adoption expenses. We will get all our money back.

I'm guessing the op lives in AZ, we do too. The only agency that would work with us turned out to be problematic which is why we went private. All other AZ agencies turned us down because we are not religious. You can pm me if you want more info.