This is a great thread...
Originally Posted by smillerhouse
My dd is 15.5. We are going to dr. Thursday for birthcontrol. Sallie
Ahhh, that is a good preventative... just a reminder that even when taken perfectly (which is rare) it can still fail. A coworker of mine has a beautiful 2 year-old to attest to that, and I lived in student family housing in university...
I would be totally supportive of my daughter, whatever she chose. In the case of abortion, I think I would make sure that she's had ample time to think about it. No matter how you argue semantics, the reality is that it is a major decision that can cause major regret later, so I would want her to be sure that it really is the best option. And once she'd thought about it, then I would take her to the appointment, and hold her hand if she wanted. I'm pro-life for myself, and pro-choice for the rest of the world, if that makes any sense.
I was (fortunately) 19 when I had to tell my mom I was pregnant. She held me, and we had a good cry together. Even though I was nearly 20, I was still completely devastated. And the best thing she did: she told me it had happened to her when she was 18, but that she'd miscarried. And a few other moms in our community privately took me aside and told me it happened to them too. While I mourned the loss of control over my life, I no longer felt like the worst woman ever! I was supposed to be the "good girl"!
And when someone in our community (mom was the secretary at a Catholic elementary school) asked her how she could support me when I'd been "bad", my mom pointed out that it's easy to be a good parent when your kids are being good. It's when they're being "bad" that they need you the most, and the hardest thing to do is be there for them, but it's the right thing to do. Fortunately, once it became known that I was 8 months pregnant (I managed to hide it until then, thinking I'd give baby up for adoption), the community was incredibly supportive, helping give me rides to appointments if mom had to work, etc, and the useful gifts...
In the end, my daughter's birth, while it was a VERY difficult time for me, and really, the timing was very poor, and her father was just so totally the wrong man, it was really the best thing that ever happened to me.
Of course, I'd be upset if DD got pg, because I would have taken pains to get her to a doctor for the pill as soon as she had a boyfriend, just in case. But hey, s**t happens. And as my doctor likes to say... babies choose their own time. (She had 5 herself.)