Pregnant... Now what?!

[BlueWolf]

Pregnant... great right? Uhm... I'm completely out of my zone here. I don't know what I should be doing next. I called my family doctor to set up a prenatal appointment for the upcoming weeks, and they told me that they don't do prenatal and that I would have to go see a OBGYN or Obstetrics. Well, how do I find one of those and know that it is a quality person? Or do I go a different route?

I'm totally out of my league here, and since we're waiting to tell family for awhile... I can't exactly talk to my MIL or mom.

I'm a planner. I like to know where I'm going and when. I like having all my ducks in a row. I'm one of those people who will leave an extra 15 minutes early just to make sure I'm on time! On time or early is awesome in my book. But how do I navigate these waters when I'm totally clueless and have no previous knowledge to go off of. Books can only tell you so much.


Help!

[curious&eager]

I thought the books were pretty good. Everybody reads what to expect when you are expecting. My family doc didn't do pregnancy either so I asked the nurses for a few names of obgyns that would fit my personality. The obgyn is ok I guess. I don't fully like them because I'm not a doctor type person. But I'm not against them. I guess it's ok. I have my first appointment on Nov. 24. They will actually do an ultrasound to date the pregnancy on the first visit which I think is weird. I have it pretty well dated with my chart don't you think? But, I do have great insurance so they can do whatever they want and it doesn't cost me any more or less, so it's ok.
So that's were you go next. Off to the obgyn. Talk to your doctor, or hop over to the tribal areas in the mothering.com forums and the locals to you can tell you who they use. I talked about a few doctors this way too.

[springbride]

Blue Wolf...I am totally in the same boat as you are! My first, and we're not telling our family 'till at least Thanksgiving! I'll take all the help/advice I can get!

[ATruck]

Time to do lots of research! You will want to explore how you want to birth- at home, birth center, or hospital. You can go to the "Finding Your Tribe" forum on MDC to see if you can find any recs for OBs/midwives. Don't be afraid to interview several or to switch care if you find that you are not seeing eye to eye with the person that you choose. Ask about c-section rates for your dr and for the hospital. There are some places with c-section rates or 50% or more, and this you want to avoid, avoid, avoid!

Have a list of questions when you go to meet with potential caregivers, and make sure they give you the answers you want/need. Also, don't feel like there is a huge rush to choose someone. You are only 4 weeks along, and prenatal care at this point is going to be advice about nutrition, vitamins, and exercise, and you can find all of this info yourself online or in books.

A great book to read is The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth but Henci Goer. Lots of info there, including advice on how to choose a caregiver.

[kristinb]

:

[LilMomma83]

You could try posting in your tribal area, or, I knew I was doing a hospital birth with my first so I asked the hospital which local women's care practice was more natural minded...and I love them, I'm using them again this time unless I can convince DH to do a home birth.

[BlueWolf]

Thanks for being a compass, guys

[treehugger75]

From what I've heard, The Pregnancy Book by Dr Sears is WAY better than What to Expect. I've only read the second, and there have been parts in there that make me want to throw the book across the room. I just started The Pregnancy Book and I have a feeling I'll enjoy it a lot more.

There's a really good section in the first chapter called Assembling Your Birth Team. I highly recommend starting there to help you decide what type of birth feels best for you, whether it be in a hospital with an OB, a birth center with a midwife or at home with a midwife or unassisted. Only you can decide which you'd prefer, but don't automatically assume that an OB is the only way to go! Even once you decide what type of provider you want to go with, there are still many questions to ask - not all OBs and midwives are created equal. I also second the recommendation for A Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth. Excellent information in there!

Good luck!

[WeasleyMum]

For books, I liked From the Hips but the Dr. Sears' guide is good as well. the Dr. Sears leans a certain way very strongly, FtH is more balanced but kind of scatterbrained in its approach. I found my OB practice through the "Finding Your Tribe" section here at MDC: I wanted to know which local OB would be the most open to natural stuff, you know, not pushing c-sections and etc. If you have a good rapport with your family doc, you could also get a reccommendation from them.

I say, sit back and relax, you have tons of time to figure everything out! Most docs won't even see you until 8 weeks or later (unless you're high-risk for some reason) and to be honest most of the first-trimester info in the books is pretty obvious: if you already know that you should be resting, eating well, taking prenatal vitamins, not smoking, not drinking, and cutting back on caffeine then you're ahead of the pack. Just keep in mind, pregnancy is not something you "do", it's really just something that happens to you!

Good luck and congratulations!!

[BlueWolf]

I am - taking prenatals, eating as healthy as I know how, I don't smoke, and I'm not a drinker. Taking it easy? Trying... currently sick with a cold. Hahah. I cut caffeine out of my diet a long time ago when I realized it was trigger the majority of my migraines. So, I guess I'm set for now

In the meantime (I posted on tribe section after you guys suggested it), I will get some new reading material! I'm not super crunchy, but I do want natural childbirth in my local hospital. I don't want drugs, and I want to avoid a c/s.

[PrairieTide]

My advice is to continue hanging out in this Due Date Club! I followed a similar due date club with my first pregnancy, and I found it to be extremely helpful. Everyone goes through a lot of the same stuff at around the same time. It's nice to know when you are feeling huge and ungainly that a group of terrific women are feeling just like you! There are also lots of helpful discussions about many of the important decisions we pregnant women make through this journey. Very helpful stuff. Take care!