Our in-laws are needy because there is no work. They know we work for our money but they rightly know that we can get it more easily than they can. My DH is not the only one working abroad and very hard to support his parents. His brothers do, too, though they can't send as much.
Usually my DH is tighter with our money than I'd be. Or at least he restrains himself for my sake. We both agree on what is a necessity and a priority for his family (health, education, religion i.e. hajj) and what is not (loaning money to distant relatives who have no intention to pay it back but just want cash for a specific item because they think MIL is rolling in it because her sons are working, not considering that she still supports her own daughters after marriage because they are in poor families...). Not that MIL would ask for that, but certain other relatives might.
Our relatives are really nice and the most they've ever asked for would be such a small sum or for something so important that we really can't object.
|Given the longstanding projection of this being a land of the fulfillment of dreams, it can be kind of like watching a relative win the lottery and then tell you they're sorry but they can't spare more than a dime. It might well be true. But it's still tough to imagine.
This is so true. They just cannot comprehend utilities and credit ratings and all that. People in very poor countries often cannot fathom the amount of forward planning and savings we have to put into our finances, so they cannot see how a bit here and there could hurt. After all, can't we borrow it from OUR relatives when we need it?
I don't blame them generally, but I have encountered people from poor countries that are exceedingly rude about it. Just- "You should give me money." But that is a very small number of people.