Originally Posted by mommy68
. The best answer for me is that a child can't possibly learn from kids their own exact age all day long sitting in a classroom. It's like the blind leading the blind. My children are exposed to younger children, older children and adults each day of their lives and THAT to me is real socialization. My children also respect authority figures unlike a lot of children in PS who disrespect their teachers and other authority figures. Kids who hang around kids their own age day in and day out start to get in trouble. They have no way of teaching one another anything except what they have learned in their very short lives.
Another thing you can point out to these kind of people is that they probably don't have a job that they go to each day where they work 7-8 hours with people who are their same exact age, do they? So they are very likely socializing with people of various age groups each day of their life and then there are likely days when they don't socialize much at all.
Are they socially inadequate? My children are learning to socialize much like most adults do and they will be better prepared for college and the work force. If they were stuck in a classroom all day long it would be much more 'un'realistic to socialize only with kids their own age, not to mention boring. lol.
Even before I ever though of hsing, I knew this. Age group socialization is unnatural, man made and just silly. The blind leading the blind so to speak. And it happens nowhere but schools. How do kids without social skills learn them from other kids who also dont have them?
Originally Posted by JavaFinch
Our homeschool group has a whole range of kids and personality types. It has nothing to do with the school social pecking order that they are 'missing out on'.
One thing that bugs me to no end is some of my family members who blame every tiny little perceived flaw in DS's behaviour as being due to homeschooling. Recently my BIL was over (very opinionated childless person) and DS was trying to do magic tricks for him and was somewhat monopolizing the conversation there for a bit. I gently told DS to do one more trick and then that we needed a break and he should find something to do for a while and when DS left the room BIL told me something to the effect that if he were in school, he could get BEAT UP a few times and that would solve that problem.
And this happens no matter WHAT **TINY** little 'misbehaviour' DS displays. It's very irritating. As if all kids in school are perfect little angels with adult-like awareness of social rules.
Then again, back when DS was younger, BIL blamed things on us co-sleeping or DS being an only child, so there was always some 'REASON' for everything - and mind you, DS is a pretty great kid, IMNSHO, so this wasn't like him having terrible outbursts or anything, just normal kid stuff.
I think sometimes those 'weird' kids are homeschooled BECAUSE they were 'weird' not that homeschooling made them that way. OR they are HS'd due to very strict religious reasons and those kids would have been judged in school as being 'weird' just the same.
It's funny how everyone 'knows' a 'weird' homeschooler. Kind of like my experience with infertility and everyone 'knowing' someone who after they adopted, had a baby on their own. Even though for the VAST % of people, that does not happen, so the fact that everyone KNOWS someone like this is a bit suspicious
your bil is just a nitpicker who must find fault, sounds like.
I have had the same thought reacently. I was thinking about it one day. I use to think all hsers were "weird". I was watching the kids at our hs group play and they are pretty normal kids. There was one little boy that was kind of unique, but yeah, it dawned on me that probally it wasnt hs that caused his personality but that because of his personality and special needs, his parents choose hs to preserve that. he is a witty, intelligent kid but a little diffrent and in ps would be the one bullied,picked on, singled out, beat up. See, those kids exist in ps or hs, they just fare far better in hs.
I saw this with myoldest ds when he joined an acting troupe, he was younger, but watchign the teens, none of them were 'cool' ya know, they were all quirky in their own way. But they were all comfortable with themselves and they all excepted each other just the way they were, no pressure to conform. I dont know if it was the nautre of that group and acting in general or if those types of kids gravitated to it, but it was great. And there was a mix of hs and ps kids in there.
I watched my own kids this morning playing and reazlied that they may be "weird' by age ten becuase no one will have defeated thier spirits, the silliness will not have been stomped out of them. LIfe will still be fun.