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Blended family issue or just normal father/son stuff? - Page 2

post #21 of 22
Thread Starter 
I wasn't offended. I was just trying to explain our situation better. I'm sure some of the "just do what you're told" expectation comes from his career. It also comes from his own upbringing. He always just did whatever his dad told him to, to the point that he let his father pick his major in college that was supposed to lead into the career his father wanted for him.

I think I'm getting my answer that this isn't necessarily a stepdad/stepson issue. It's probably something more personal and individual with my dh.
post #22 of 22
Thread Starter 
We're back from our trip. It was fun. I think dh and ds had some time to just talk and be cool together while we were driving. I sat in the back so ds could sit up front with dh. He likes to talk in the car.

I have an example of the type of behavior I was talking about that I want to get your opinion on. When we stopped at my mother's house my dh brought everyone's suitcases in from the car, everyone's except 17yo ds's, that is. When I asked dh about it he just kind of shrugged like he hadn't realized he'd done that but he never did go back out to get ds' suitcase. I know he was thinking that ds could bring in his own suitcase but so could I. He would never even expect me to do that. He also would get a suitcase for a friend or any other family member that was capable. I just find it interesting that he doesn't do it for ds.

Also, he packed for ds because he was giving us a hard time about going. He packed a bunch of clothes that ds doesn't wear, stuff that wasn't even his. I mentioned it to dh and, again, he just acted like he didn't know what I was talking about and did nothing to remedy the situation. I had to grab a bunch of loose pairs of jeans and throw them in the back of the car at the last minute. Then dh complained that ds wore the same pair of jeans for 3 days. Well, he didn't have anything else. I think dh purposely packed a bunch of stuff he knew ds doesn't like as a sort of punishment for not being happy and compliant about going on the trip with us. DH is very passive/aggressive. Of course, he won't admit that.

So, what do you all think? Is that just a normal father/teen son thing or does it sound like maybe a stepfather/stepson thing?
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