Weekly Post Partum Chat & Support 11/15-11/21

[janasmama]

Good morning everyone!

This is our last week in our house. Packing hasn't been too bad....some friends have come over to hold Annalise for me so I get at least one box packed a day.

Annalise is a really good sleeper compared to my other babies so I feel very blessed. Her cold is still hanging around and she coughs just a bit...I hope she gets better soon.

Today is my last day babysitting, I'm transitioning the new girl for the last time. When we get to our new town I think I'm still going to take one child but it will have to be at my house. It's hard to deal with my own 3 but it seems like when there is another child DD's age (4) things can actually be easier b/c it entertains her to have someone to play with since she is very high needs.

[Amber Lion]

Sending you quick and easy moving vibes!!

I finally got Addie to sleep in the wrap. Seriously, this thing is a life saver cause I was getting really desperate and within 2 minutes she was out. Now, if I could just get her to nurse well when she wakes up I'll be happy... I'm not asking for much, right?

Adelh is 3 weeks old today. On one hand I can't believe it's been so long and the other it seems so short a time. How can you love someone so much and still not even really know them yet?

[TaraRae82]

Ally Rae finally went to sleep last night with minimal fussing! No scream-fest! Hooray! She passed out at about 9:30 so we all went to bed.

[Baby_Cakes]

Nora was up again last night till 3:30am! Ugh! We're going to try to keep her up again from 7 or so to see if it helps at all. My in laws came by today right in the middle of the afternoon, and for some reason they seemed bummed that she was napping. I just don't get that. Babies sleep, they take naps, and no, you cannot wake her up just b/c you're here and want to see her. It's not like she does much anyway, it's not like she plays or anything.

And they want her wish list for christmas. What? Um, she's a month old, what on earth does she want for christmas?? We did lay down the law though, nothing elmo and nothing that lights up/flashes/makes noise.

Sorry this is so ranty. I'm running on no sleep and no afternoon nap! Ok, duty calls - hope everyone is having a great weekend!

[crabbyowl]

We had a rough night too - we had Eleanor out in the livingroom with a basketball game on and she fell asleep with no problem, but when I took her in the bedroom at around 10:30 (we have a little night owl!) she started crying and would not calm down. It just kept escalating - she wouldn't nurse or take a bottle, she had a fresh diaper, and I took all her clothes off so I knew that wasn't the problem. She also did NOT want to be held, so the only thing I could do was put her down in her little rocking bed (which has been a Godsend: http://www.amazon.com/Fisher-Price-S.../dp/B000B4SVM4) and just be there with her. I'd give her a pacifier as often as she would take it so she'd be able to comfort-suck, and eventually she cried herself to sleep. : It's so sad to see her like that and know there's nothing you can do that will help.

2 observations. Murphy's law of diapers: Eleanor will rarely poop in anything but a diaper that's just been changed. Also, having her sleep on my chest is great but the pressure on my breasts causes them to leak copiously! I woke up this morning and both my top and her outfit were soaked!

DH and I are going to see the new Bond movie tonight!!

[TaraRae82]

Carrie, I took the advice of some of the mamas on here re: non-sleeping babies. I think they're right that Ally Rae is getting over-stimulated during the day and is just over-tired at night because of it. So, yesterday, I kept the lights dimmed all day and the TV volume low and turned it off for several hours and just had Christmas music playing. This didn't help when I did it on Thurs but I think it really did help last night. We've had a calm day again today and her behavior today has been very similar to yesterday so I'm hoping maybe, just maybe, we'll have another good night. The screaming just hurts my feelings SO badly, I can hardly stand it. : It's so hard to have such an upset baby and not know how to help or even if you can help. I hope you and Nora can work through this and you feel like a stronger mama because of it.

[Changed]

Subbing.

I'm so glad it's getting easier Tara. Hopefully we'll all get through this fun newborn stuff soon.

LO is going through the 6 week growth spurt. This is AWESOME for me because it's meant that his needs are finally close to my supply and I'm not totally engorged anymore. The altoids method of decreasing supply seems to have worked!

[mamanurse]

Originally Posted by janasmama

Good morning everyone!

This is our last week in our house. Packing hasn't been too bad....some friends have come over to hold Annalise for me so I get at least one box packed a day.

You are such a freaking rock star!!! I can't believe you're moving so soon after birth!!!

Originally Posted by TaraRae82

Ally Rae finally went to sleep last night with minimal fussing! No scream-fest! Hooray! She passed out at about 9:30 so we all went to bed.

Doing a happy dance for you!!!

Originally Posted by Baby_Cakes

Nora was up again last night till 3:30am! Ugh! We're going to try to keep her up again from 7 or so to see if it helps at all. My in laws came by today right in the middle of the afternoon, and for some reason they seemed bummed that she was napping. I just don't get that. Babies sleep, they take naps, and no, you cannot wake her up just b/c you're here and want to see her. It's not like she does much anyway, it's not like she plays or anything.

And they want her wish list for christmas. What? Um, she's a month old, what on earth does she want for christmas?? We did lay down the law though, nothing elmo and nothing that lights up/flashes/makes noise.

Sorry this is so ranty. I'm running on no sleep and no afternoon nap! Ok, duty calls - hope everyone is having a great weekend!

Some peeps just don't get it. I NEVER wake my babe up for anyone, but me. Selfish huh? I mean to feed or so forth. She would sleep 6 hours during the day if I let her.

Originally Posted by Changed

LO is going through the 6 week growth spurt. This is AWESOME for me because it's meant that his needs are finally close to my supply and I'm not totally engorged anymore. The altoids method of decreasing supply seems to have worked!

I do believe mine has hit the 3 week growth spurt. She completely drained my breasteses (as dd calls 'em) yesterday and nursed quite a bit last night. Oh! What's the altoids method?

AAM: My stupid saga continues. I've been MIA here because I had to be re-admitted back to L&D Yes, again. I spiked a temp to 104.6 and had a large amount of low abdominal pain on Thursday night so I called my sis to take me to the hospital. It seems I have a bit of scar tissue from the D&C that also became infected. They should just designate a special room for me. I had a small procedure called a hysteroscopy guided laser revision. Hopefully this is the last damn gyn procedure I ever have in my life. Hazel was a trooper and I had my sister come to the ED and stay on L&D with me instead of dh. She's way more useful and a lot less whiney. Dh, of course, stayed with dd1. I've decided he's essentially worthless when I have an emergency. :

The good news is that I have officially hit my deductible on my insurance and am also going to have my "elective" tonsillectomy next month. I was supposed to have it in March, but got knocked up in February instead It's really the best financial time for me to do it since I won't miss anymore work, dh will be home to help with the dd's, and I won't pay a dime out of pocket since I've reached my deductible.

[sonshine_rae]

Tara I'm so glad you're getting a easier day or two I hope it continues! We don't even have a tv in our house, but the older boys are stimulation enough around here LOL! The majority of our night time issues are from a over tired/over stimulated baby now too.

Thankfully his reflux is calming down with the meds and home methods, sigh... that makes me feel a lot better.

Crabbyowl I'm sorry things are still rough there for you hopefully as she matures she will calm down more readily for you ((hugs)). I've had a child (my first) who when overstimulated/overtired (which happened a lot) would just want to cry by himself, anything we did to 'help' just made him more upset and he'd cry longer. SIGH he's still my most challenging child to date LOL!

Carrie it's always been my experience the more tired/over tired a baby is the more awake they become, the more alert, fussy, and over stimulated they get, basically until the are hyper! Whereas the more they sleep .. the more easily they go back to sleep again. YMMV though.

AAM Samuel is soooo fussy, today he just wants Mama I can rarely do anything without him wanting me back... ugh! DH did get Samuel to take one nap on him today, and I took a nap in my bed (by myself!) at that point. Otherwise he wants to nurse, cuddle, or sleep with me, thank God for baby carriers lol...

Shall we all repeat together: 'My child will only be this young for a little while, they will NOT always want or need to be held, we WILL miss this time.'

Speaking of.... there he is waking up again.... ahh! gtg

[janasmama]

Originally Posted by TaraRae82

Ally Rae finally went to sleep last night with minimal fussing! No scream-fest! Hooray! She passed out at about 9:30 so we all went to bed.

How funny...Annalise did too and she pretty much stayed asleep! It's funny, I have more kids now than ever and less time to do anything than ever but I'm way less sleep deprived than I was with my first baby.

Originally Posted by mamanurse

You are such a freaking rock star!!! I can't believe you're moving so soon after birth!!!

I find it hard to do my regular day-to-day stuff though on top of the packing. I'm really wanting Annalise to be able to have good head control so I can put her on my back but that won't happen during moving. It's hard to do so much with her on the front.

I weighed Annalise today....she's 6 weeks and 10 pounds 8 ounces.

[mamanurse]

Originally Posted by sonshine_rae

it's always been my experience the more tired/over tired a baby is the more awake they become, the more alert, fussy, and over stimulated they get, basically until the are hyper! Whereas the more they sleep .. the more easily they go back to sleep again. YMMV though.

Shall we all repeat together: 'My child will only be this young for a little while, they will NOT always want or need to be held, we WILL miss this time.'

Speaking of.... there he is waking up again.... ahh! gtg

I know I will totally miss the nb period. They're only this snuggly once.

That's also been my experience as well Rae. My first slept 16-18 hours a day from 3-7 months. She fell into a nap/sleep routine and I did my best to oblige her. She was an excessively happy baby during the six hours a day she was awake. Maybe if we'd figured out the more sleep=more sleep thing earlier, she would not have had "colic" from 5-12 weeks. Who knows though... I'm a big fan of saying "It's all a crapshoot anyway."

[neveryoumindthere]

how do you *get* them to sleep?
Which signs of tiredness do they give before you get them to sleep or do they just get put down and they close their eyes?

ds is becoming much more fussy and not sleeping as much just wondering what tips you all have

[sonshine_rae]

Sleepy signs:
One of the earliest signs of a baby getting tired is when they are happy/awake and start to 'avoid' your gaze and stare off away from you, if you try to get their attention they ignore you.. they are trying NOT to get over stimulated if someone keeps pushing them at this point they will be over tired soon.

The other signs are rubbing eyes/yawning, and of course fussing (which means a zillion things by itself lol).

So far I have not had a child who would 'just fall asleep' at least not on a regular basis, usually it involved nursing (or reading when they are a toddler), rocking, swaying, or babywearing, to get them asleep, the sooner you start the 'sleepy routine' when they get tired the more likely you can avoid them getting over tired.

You could also try the 5 s's ... swaddling, sucking (nursing, bottle, or pacifier doesn't matter), side-lying, swaying, shushing.

Swaddling, swaying, sucking and shushing have all done wonders for us.. side-lying doesn't usually make much diff for us though?

Basically do whatever it takes to get them to relax and go to sleep, for some kids that is simply to leave them alone, my first would fuss (sometimes cry a lil) a few minutes and fall asleep if put to bed when he was showing sleepy signs. But if you tried to comfort him to sleep he would start screaming out of control and take hrs to go to sleep!!! My next kid needed to be held, rocked and/or nursed to sleep.

This kid we don't have a good pattern yet.. sigh I am longing for one though! But he definitely prefers to be held, nursed, swayed etc...

all of my kids are usually swaddled at night for the first couple of months or so.

hth's

[Changed]

Re- method altoids- Um, I'm not sure exactly how many you're supposed to take a day. I've read that a few won't do anything. The LC told me we would try it if block feeding didn't work and when it didn't and I was about to pop, I just started eating them two at a time for about 2 days. I didn't quite eat one tin. I never got the actual suggestion on how many from the LC. They have real peppermint oil so which is thought to dry up your milk some. Anyway, the effects seemed to take about 4-6 days but my supply dropped quite a bit and I'm not even needing to pump anymore!!!!


Man, I'm having a rough evening. This kid is SO HOT NATURED that it's driving me nuts. Sometimes I'd swear he had a fever... it's usually about 99.-99.1 when I take it rectally because I'm worried. I know that's not a big deal but my mind runs away with "what if's" and I literally feel sick with worry like I'm on the verge of an anxiety attack. I know I mentioned it early on but my daughter died not so long ago and she had a lot of health problems. The feelings of worry about hospitalizations and illness are so familiar and real. I just keep telling myself to calm down and stop freaking out because I know he's healthy but i'll admit I've sat up until I literally passed out watching him breath and worrying about him throwing up or getting a fever quite a few nights. This part sucks. I can't wait until he's bigger and every little sniffle isn't so scary. No one seems to understand either and that makes me feel really... blah.


Mamanurse- I'm sorry this just keeps going and going. Heal well.

[janasmama]

Originally Posted by sonshine_rae

So far I have not had a child who would 'just fall asleep' at least not on a regular basis, usually it involved nursing (or reading when they are a toddler), rocking, swaying, or babywearing, to get them asleep, the sooner you start the 'sleepy routine' when they get tired the more likely you can avoid them getting over tired.

Oh my goodness...Annie fell asleep on her own yesterday for a short morning nap. I laid her down in the porta-crib in the living room so I could eat b'fast and when I went back to look at her she was sleeping! So I got some laundry put away.

I don't expect this to happen often but it is just a sign to me that she may be an easier baby than my last two have been b/c I've never had a good sleeper.

Changed - Annie is really hot too. Sometimes so hot it's difficult to wear her b/c we both end up sweating and it's not even hot!

[Baby_Cakes]

Yeah, Nora doesn't just fall asleep on her own, but she does respond to the nursing to sleep, shushing, rocking, swaying, etc. She likes to fall asleep in her swing. I just feel bad when she's sleeping for 2-3 hours, swinging. Sometimes I stop the swing and she stays asleep, other times she needs the swing going plus the music!

I would kill for a routine. Typically, when can I expect that to happen?

Changed - Sorry you're so stressed!

Mamanurse - to you too! I can't believe it never seems to end. Hopefully things settle down soon!

And, my reason for posting, which I cannot believe I forgot to mention before, but DH and I DTD last night! Woo hoo! It was a little ouchy at first but then I was fine. I am so glad the "first time" is over with and now it's more about finding time to be together. Huzzah!

[mamanurse]

Originally Posted by Baby_Cakes

I would kill for a routine. Typically, when can I expect that to happen?

Mamanurse - to you too! I can't believe it never seems to end. Hopefully things settle down soon!

And, my reason for posting, which I cannot believe I forgot to mention before, but DH and I DTD last night! Woo hoo! It was a little ouchy at first but then I was fine. I am so glad the "first time" is over with and now it's more about finding time to be together. Huzzah!

Congrats on DTD!!! We're still at least 4 weeks out 'cause of my new infection.

As for a routine. Mine fell into an extremely consistent one at around 3 months.

Thanks for the cyberhug and kind words Carrie. I feel like I fell out of the unlucky tree and hit every branch on the way down.

[janasmama]

This was in another thread that I frequent. The Sept 2004 Mamas. I thought I'd share these wise words with you all since these days are long days...and nights.

Originally Posted by AugustineM

You know what else keeps me positive and allows me to refocus if I'm having a bad, low patience day? Well, a hot shower or bath always helps, but also, I have this "pie of life" graphic on the fridge and it shows basically the stages of your life, and the slice of the pie that is childbearing and babies/young children, and it is SUCH a small piece of the pie. 1/3 of your life is spent before kids, about about 1/3 is spent "empty nest", and about 1/4 is spent with older, school age kids. So it is such a tiny part that is with babies/toddlers/preschoolers. Somehow that always helps me focus. My doula says, "The days can be long but the years are short."

[crosscat]

Hey there... all that wrap talk from last week's thread inspired me to give my Moby another try. I used the newborn hug hold (watched a vid on You Tube for instruction) and loved it so much! It's everything I like about my Babyhawk, but also more snug and secure.

I hope your move goes smoothly janasmama!
mamanurse so sorry to hear you had more problems! Get all better soon!
Mamas whose LOs are sleeping well, I wish you continued success.
Mamas whose LOs aren't sleeping so well, I hope you get some sleep soon!
Changed

Tomorrow, we're taking Calla to visit my in-laws, who are really great. I'm looking forward to the outing.

Well Calla is trying to latch on to her father's nose, so I better go!

Take care!

[AmamaAgain]

well..my babe is officially spoiled. thanks to weeks on the couch sleeping while holding him due to c section recovery, he refuses to be in the swing. refuses all pacifiers, sling and bouncer seat. julien will not sleep in the crib/bed or out of my arms. ive tried everything. he will just scream for an hour until i pick him back up. then he gets all cuddled on my chest. its been 6 weeks now since i have slept in my room.

AND

now him and i both have colds...sneezing, fevers, chills, the whole thing. And me holding him while we're both burning hot is not going well.

i can relate with you guys about non sleeping/fussy babes. he has been like that since day one butnow that julien is sick...he's sleeping almost all night and day.


sorry for the typos. im holding him while typing