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Naomi, I have ready your post on withholding bowels and I am desperately trying to understand the balance of control and freedom for the child to develop self reliance. We now have our 2 year-old on a laxative, which I am not so keen on but felt it was necessary after trying everything else (except dealing with possible control issues). She is still nursing on demand both day as well as through the night. We are trying to encourage more fluids (1 cup of rice milk or water is the most I achieve). My physician suggests weaning so there is a feeling of hunger and then more food and fluid intake.
This is a lot, but my real concern is the possible control issue and the amount of food and liquid intake which is likely linked to control (she eats so little.) I think I am worried about taking charge in fear of creating a problem I don't really know where the devision is for freedom and control. Any advice you have would be great.
Dear parent,
Your question does not tell me what your daughter eats, and what her behavioral and emotional expressions are. I therefore simply recommend that you assume there is an emotional side to her constipation and follow the suggestions in my previous answer: http://mothering.com/health/two-year-old-holding-bowels
At the same time, continue breastfeeding. Your child is much too young for weaning and there is no logic in discontinuing this regular liquid intact. Breastfeeding gives her much more liquid that she will ever get without it. Make sure to eat non constipating food yourself, and to offer her lots of raw fruit (with the skin) and vegetables and raw or at least not overly cooked fats (never heated oils or fried foods.) Avoid all sugars, refined grains, baking goods, and processed foods. Rice milk can sometimes constipate.
Laxatives can be harmful and causing more constipation and dependency on them in the long run. Foods can do the same job healthfully. In addition to raw fruits and vegetables, give your child a little organic unsalted butter (ideally raw,) or, some cold press organic oliver oil before meals, to make the bowel movement move slippery and therefore less painful, even when hard.
At age two some children sometimes breastfeed almost exclusively, so that does not necessarily mean that she is holding back but I cannot know without speaking with you. If you wish to discuss the possibility of emotional control issue with me, I will be happy to assist you via a phone session. You can sign up for a session on my site: http://authenticparent.com/guidance.html
Warmly, Naomi Aldort, http://authenticparent.com/