Happy Birthday to the trees this SHEVAT, Jewish Mamas! [Archive]

tikva18

01-26-2009, 12:01 PM

that's okay - if you spelled it wrong - people will just think that we're doing brissim to the trees.

Got ahold of Bais Yaakov this a.m. - that was fun. They don't offer scholarship for preschool. Why? her words "because parents are going to send somewhere, so why should we? "
Nice.

anyway, tuition there this year is:$3300. vs. where Nachman is $5250.

Dh told me that we'll just send to public school. I forsee homeschooling - am not up for that.
I said to the lady in the business office. "Wait a minute, don't you expect the kids going into kindergarten to have had school experience before?" she said, yes and they have to know their alef-beis... I told her that my kids might end up going no place because I just can't.

mombh

01-26-2009, 12:07 PM

subbing!!

good chodesh mamas, I 'm still here....well at least kinda, don't have much time lately yk.
B"H things with baby Yosef are going better , he is nursing more and growing ...and just sweet:joy: but it is still soooooo... time consuming and I am tired, and ofcourse have lost my memory again, ..........
I was o.k. for about 2 years after ds 5 1/2 weaned:D

RachelEve14

01-26-2009, 12:09 PM

Aaaw, Rivka, sorry :( I hope you find a good solution for next year.

Chava, has the thread been quieter? I can hardly keep up anyway. I switched my MDC to 100 answers per page so it seems less overwheming for me.

All here is good. I can't beleive it's Sh'vat. My twins are going to be FIVE soon. How did that happen? Their birthday is in just 3 weeks. :yikes:

Chavelamomela

01-26-2009, 02:12 PM

A guten chodesh mamas!

I can't seem to get my house back in order. When I get one room or area cleaned/fixed, another area turns to chaos.

We put away all the books& seforim & tchotchkes into our new bookshelves, rearranged the furniture, etc. But now Ds's room is a disaster, and our LR has been taken over by all the tax documents as we prepare our tax returns.

And I planned on cooking 4 dishes yesterday to have food during the week, and ended up making NOTHING!!!

My back is killing me. I sneeze and it goes into spasm. I am sitting here at my desk at work w. a heating pad on my lower back. Hope this pain goes away soon!

Faliciagayle

01-26-2009, 02:13 PM

Did anyone watch "Loving Leah" last night? Thoughts?

Chavelamomela

01-26-2009, 02:42 PM

DH and I saw it and picked it apart. First of all, the most obvious critique is that Yibum is not practiced today, even if a non-frum BIL doesn't want to go through with chalitza and contrives a marriage of convenience so she can go to college...

I heard the nasty remarks about chassidic women's dress on "the View" - and man o man, the costume designer for this movie picked some FRUMPY clothes! No wonder the women of the view think it's normal for chasidic women to dress so poorly! What's w. all the blouses w. ties at the neck? Come on!!!

And covering red hair w. a brown sheytel? I only know some hareidim who do this (we have a family member who does) but still...not w. such a different color as BROWN...just a lighter strawberry blonde or auburn...it was a stretch.

ETA: At the same time, DH and I did catch everything they did get right, and there were many things they obviously consulted frum people on to get right...but it was sooooo contrived!

And then of course, the Hollywoodized story after that, where they fall in love...sheesh.

imnottelling

01-26-2009, 02:47 PM

You should be able to edit the thread title if you edit your first post.
I tried. On other boards I can, and on other posts, but not on the thread starter.

imnottelling

01-26-2009, 02:51 PM

I've always done a booster for car pools. Sorry - no help there. But my kids did not complain about still being in a harness with me.

I'm curious to see how active the thread is. It seems a number of posters have jumped ship :(
Oh, I do hope we get people back! I don't post much, but I enjoy reading real people's real lives, IYKWIM.

So there is still hope for the harness. I hope!
My husband seems to think we can use the front seat (airbag shut off) for little pitzkele 4 year olds in boosters. It's just not as safe as the back, but it's as safe there as it is for an adult if the airbag is off. That worries me to pieces and I have no interest in my son being there, so why should I put another little kid there?
As is, we have an 8 seater. Me + 3 kids (in the car or not, I don't care. I am NOT reinstalling those car seats that my husband is neurotic about making sure they're in right twice a week) take up 4 seats. That leaves 3 in the back == carpool of me + 3 others. If we had a carpool of 5, it would make things so much simpler. Why can't they just get schoolbuses, or better yet move close by?!

imnottelling

01-26-2009, 02:57 PM

that's okay - if you spelled it wrong - people will just think that we're doing brissim to the trees.
That's what I was afraid of! LOL

Got ahold of Bais Yaakov this a.m. - that was fun. They don't offer scholarship for preschool. Why? her words "because parents are going to send somewhere, so why should we? "
Nice.

Figured as much. My husband basically said if we can't afford full tuition, they're not going to kick us out.
Maybe the money we've donated from maaser can go to tuition? I wish.
It's so ridiculously expensive. I could get a full day program for less money, if we sent elsewhere.

anyway, tuition there this year is:$3300. vs. where Nachman is $5250.

Why such a huge difference? Are the lengths of the day the same? More time off at BY? Why would their expenses be so much less that they can charge less? If I were you, I'd probably send Gedaliah to BY this year...makes life simpler, money is less, and he'd learn to make friends with the comfort of having his sister at the same time...a good transition.

Dh told me that we'll just send to public school. I forsee homeschooling - am not up for that.
Here too -- I contemplated it for half a second but don't have the energy at this point in my life. But it would definitely make the blanket vaccine rules easier on me. And the money.

I said to the lady in the business office. "Wait a minute, don't you expect the kids going into kindergarten to have had school experience before?" she said, yes and they have to know their alef-beis... I told her that my kids might end up going no place because I just can't.
That's ridiculous. Many kids only grasp these later, even if they are taught. Not ever child is ready to understand their letters by 5.

imnottelling

01-26-2009, 02:58 PM

Chavelamomela

01-26-2009, 04:32 PM

I heard that pregnancy causes brain cell loss. It's proven!

Yeah, but don't tell this to our bosses!

mamaverdi

01-26-2009, 04:32 PM

I'm around sort of.

My oldest ds was the only one in day school. If we still live here next year, he won't be in school.

Faliciagayle

01-26-2009, 04:38 PM

Yeah, the clothes were pretty awful. :lol

What I was most surprised about was Leah's turning towards Reform. I mean, the fancy dress she wore had a pretty low neckline and her upper arms were totally visible. And did she stop covering completely? Or was the long strawberry blond hair supposed to be a wig as well? That kinda irritated me. But other than that, it was nice to see something like that on mainstream TV.

LOVE ricci lake as a rabbi!

DH and I saw it and picked it apart. First of all, the most obvious critique is that Yibum is not practiced today, even if a non-frum BIL doesn't want to go through with chalitza and contrives a marriage of convenience so she can go to college...

I heard the nasty remarks about chassidic women's dress on "the View" - and man o man, the costume designer for this movie picked some FRUMPY clothes! No wonder the women of the view think it's normal for chasidic women to dress so poorly! What's w. all the blouses w. ties at the neck? Come on!!!

And covering red hair w. a brown sheytel? I only know some hareidim who do this (we have a family member who does) but still...not w. such a different color as BROWN...just a lighter strawberry blonde or auburn...it was a stretch.

ETA: At the same time, DH and I did catch everything they did get right, and there were many things they obviously consulted frum people on to get right...but it was sooooo contrived!

And then of course, the Hollywoodized story after that, where they fall in love...sheesh.

Ruthla

01-26-2009, 04:41 PM

Rosh Chodesh, time to get things moving :)
So now this thread is a laxative? :duck:

Chavi- have you tried going to a chiropractor for that back pain?

I'm having some money troubles myself. Apparently I won't get food stamps starting in February until I have a telephone interview and get them paperwork proving I'm not paying a rediculous amount of money in tuition for DS.

I've tried calling my caseworker, but either her voicemailbox is full or I leave a message and dont' get a return call. I got through last Tuesday and still no callback. I tried the main Food Stamps number and got 'no room in the mailbox."

I also don't have anything from the school verifying tuition assistance. At this point, they still think I owe them $5,000+ for DS' tuition, although they're not pressing me for it. I'm going to be mighty pissed off if this paperwork blunder ends up costing me $500+ a month in benefits! Hopefully I can at least get something from the office stating that I haven't actualy paid them anything this year.

And in the mail on Friday I got the forms for signing DS up for next year. I just don't think I can do this again. First off, I can't afford the deposit they need to even process his application (my parents paid the deposit the past 2 years, but are unable to do so this year.) And to throw more money at a school that's causing me all this financial stress AND that isn't truly meeting DS' educational needs....

flminivanmama

01-26-2009, 05:15 PM

I missed that show... never even heard about it... what channel was it on?

crazy_eights

01-26-2009, 05:16 PM

Why can't they just get schoolbuses, or better yet move close by?!

We have the same issue

crazy_eights

01-26-2009, 05:20 PM

Chavi- have you tried going to a chiropractor for that back pain?

Chavi's dh is a chiropractor :lol:

Ruthla

01-26-2009, 05:57 PM

In that case Chavi, have you tried having a chiropractor come to you? :lol

Faliciagayle

01-26-2009, 07:20 PM

I missed that show... never even heard about it... what channel was it on?

CBS? I think. A major network. It was a "Hallmark Hall of Fame" movie.

crazy_eights

01-26-2009, 07:23 PM

Abc (ok, that's supposed to be the network, but something keeps autocorrecting it to not be all caps)

SaraFR

01-26-2009, 07:47 PM

Is there anyway to see it on the internet (for those of us without tvs)?

tikva18

01-26-2009, 08:32 PM

cough cough - It was on cbs. I actually, cough cough, watched it. I wanted to see how frum yidden were being portrayed. It was rather icky. They made the men look foolish/peculiar and the women frumpy. They didn't understand the basics of yiddishkeit and made glaring errors - like eating a bagel without washing. There was no concept of tznius - I guess having actors who were never frum or Jewish (don't know if they were), they couldn't grasp tznius - just dressing that way doesn't make you act tznius. I didn't like that they had Leah not covering her hair when she was alone - apparently they'd never heard of snoods... The long hair toward the end was a sheitl.
The business of Leah talking with a female rabbi - that wasn't realistic - nor going to her 'temple'. But I guess that's the point of movies - to extract fantasy out of realism. OTOH, I wish that they had portrayed yidden the way we really are.

And FeliciaGayle - I only knew it was on because of the link you provided... and if this had happened whenver it is that they change the broadcasting to HD or pq or whatever it is, I won't have t.v. at all anymore. We usually just use the screen for the rare video that the kids get when they are sick.

Chavelamomela

01-26-2009, 09:31 PM

Chavi- have you tried going to a chiropractor for that back pain?

LOL DH is a chiropractor! it doesn;t seem to help much - I am doing heat, w. some good temporary results.

Chavelamomela

01-26-2009, 09:32 PM

The long red hair at the end of Loving Leah was NOT a sheytel - that was the whole thing when she pulled off the sheytel and took out her red long hair...

tikva18

01-26-2009, 10:12 PM

hmm, I distinctly remember her having two sheitls one long and one shorter...

mamaverdi

01-26-2009, 10:17 PM

I didn't see it.

I can change the title of the thread. ;)

crazy_eights

01-26-2009, 10:20 PM

hmm, I distinctly remember her having two sheitls one long and one shorter...
Wasn't part of the deal that she was wearing a dowdy brown sheitel? So how would she have 2 red sheitels?

tikva18

01-26-2009, 10:33 PM

one was a brown one - not bad looking - and the other was longer... maybe it wasn't brown, but red? who knows... narishkeit anyway...
and to think that I was a participant... geesh.

3daughters

01-26-2009, 11:30 PM

Maybe the money we've donated from maaser can go to tuition? I wish.

YES YOU CAN! The school in Philadelphia (that has Rav Kemenetsky on its Rabbinic Board) encouraged families to do this!

Kmelion

01-26-2009, 11:47 PM

So does anyone do a Tu b'Shavat Seder? If so, will you be doing it on Shabbat, or on Tu b'Shavat itself?

npl

01-27-2009, 08:09 AM

I'm here, just not much to say. And somehow, I totally missed this new thread starting for sh'vat!

I have lots going on - kids on winter break, trying to reorganize the house, ds' Hebrew birthday tonight (I was too sick to do anything special for his English, so I should really make him a cake, after I kasher the oven, after I do the shrinky-dinks for ds because he's been waiting for months...) And dh's birthday is tomorrow and I have to make a cake for him, and still buy a present from me. Oh, and we have a preschoolers playdate today and a big-girl one tomorrow and I have to figure out who is around for the middle kid to have a playdate with. So, I'm hiding away at the computer, instead!

imnottelling

01-27-2009, 11:24 AM

I didn't see it.

I can change the title of the thread. ;)

Thank you! I wasn't sure if you had moderating capabilities in this section :)

imnottelling

01-27-2009, 11:31 AM

YES YOU CAN! The school in Philadelphia (that has Rav Kemenetsky on its Rabbinic Board) encouraged families to do this!

I think I've heard this before. Gonna ask my hubby. What about all the donations we've been giving the past few years? That would take a HUGE chunk out.

According to people we've talked to, even organizing a bus doesn't sound too good as there will be bullying and what not for my little fragile preschooler. :(

And do we have an insurance-hating club? My 6 month old is still not insured! Why not? She should have been added automatically at birth. I'm not sure if the homebirth messed things up, btu she wasn't. I tried applying, didn't hear back. Left messages and messages and messages and finally decided to reapply again. I did and then I was told I needed to verify her existence and sign an affidavit and get her birth certificate even though the law is clear that she didn't need it since I was on when I was pregnant. Whatever, I did it. Finally got her on. Name was spelled Toba. They must have realized it's not the same as her birth certificate because I got a call saying they "corrected the error" and a letter with a new number. This time her name is spelled Tioba. I tried getting her on an MCO with the old number: cancelled. With the new one: system doesn't recognize it. I leave messages and messages and messages....and no one calls me back! And after I get this straightened out, I really need her backdated to birth. This is all for the state medical program. Our primary one has her listed under Toida. How many variations of her name can there be already?!

(And we will NOT discuss my oldest son's birth which is still under insurance woes because they are totally messed up and threatening to send me who doesn't owe a penny to collection agencies.)

Blah. I have an easy life compared to most of you, but still. Blah.

mamaverdi

01-28-2009, 09:22 AM

:wave I hate insurance. I hate being without it, but I hate it nonetheless.

SaraFR

01-28-2009, 07:42 PM

You need to ask a shaila (Question to a Rav) regarding using maaser for tuition. I know some people who were told they could for a certain percentage (I don't know for sure which percentage the Rav gave). We (and others) were told we could NOT use maaser for tuition.

Faliciagayle

01-28-2009, 09:39 PM

And do we have an insurance-hating club? My 6 month old is still not insured! Why not? She should have been added automatically at birth. I'm not sure if the homebirth messed things up, btu she wasn't. I tried applying, didn't hear back. Left messages and messages and messages and finally decided to reapply again. I did and then I was told I needed to verify her existence and sign an affidavit and get her birth certificate even though the law is clear that she didn't need it since I was on when I was pregnant. Whatever, I did it. Finally got her on. Name was spelled Toba. They must have realized it's not the same as her birth certificate because I got a call saying they "corrected the error" and a letter with a new number. This time her name is spelled Tioba. I tried getting her on an MCO with the old number: cancelled. With the new one: system doesn't recognize it. I leave messages and messages and messages....and no one calls me back! And after I get this straightened out, I really need her backdated to birth. This is all for the state medical program. Our primary one has her listed under Toida. How many variations of her name can there be already?!

(And we will NOT discuss my oldest son's birth which is still under insurance woes because they are totally messed up and threatening to send me who doesn't owe a penny to collection agencies.)

Blah. I have an easy life compared to most of you, but still. Blah.

:hug

imnottelling

01-29-2009, 11:16 AM

SaraFR

01-29-2009, 08:28 PM

Same rav, different circumstances?
Or different rav?
I think different Rav.

imnottelling

01-30-2009, 10:38 AM

My boys this morning took pump flanges and pretended to pump and then drink straight from the flange...My older one then says "I have no more milk in my tummy. I have to go to the store and buy some more to put in there, ok?" :p

flminivanmama

01-30-2009, 02:41 PM

too cute!

tikva18

02-01-2009, 10:01 AM

where is everyone?

yogal

02-01-2009, 10:59 AM

whats maaser again?

yogal

02-01-2009, 11:00 AM

oh and:treehugger: Happy Birthday to the Trees!

Kmelion

02-01-2009, 11:44 AM

whats maaser again?

Taxation.

smeisnotapirate

02-01-2009, 11:00 PM

Maaser is the "tenth" which refers to tzedakah.

I'm here. Barely, but here. I started feeling better off my medication, so I've been doing that. Had a breakdown today, but I'm feeling better now. I just have lots of triggers now - more than I ever have - and I need to take things slower.

I also need to kick my tuches into gear and start getting up earlier. Most of my stress is because I can't get out of bed in the morning and then OMG, it's noon and I've accomplished NOTHING.

So here's to tuches-kicking. It's nice to be back.

gilamama

02-02-2009, 08:16 AM

sara, trty to reframe what you are going through. it is normal for you to want to sleep till noon, you had a baby a few months ago and went back to work soon after that. even if you werent working out of the home that is normal. the problem is not you - that you didnt get enough done. the problem might be that you have too much to do.

:hug

you are probably doing great and way more normal than you think.

Ruthla

02-02-2009, 08:24 AM

Ugh. DS is so hard to get up on Monday mornings. He really doesn't like his Hebrew class and doesn't want to go.

I'm giving SERIOUS thought to putting him in public school next year. No stresses with the Tuition department. No extra paperwork for Food Stamps and Medicaid (who need proof that he's getting financial aide since he's in private school.)

I am worried about his Yiddishkeit- how he'll function as a Jew when he's in a secular environment all day- will he be willing to wear tzitzit or a kippa to school? Should I make him daven before school in the mornings? Is he going to feel "left out" of non-kosher celebrations or discussions of things that take place on Shabbos?

But at the same time, I'm worried about his Yiddishkeit if he stays where he is now. He's associating Judaism with being in a school that doesn't quite fit his needs. He's thinking badly of Shabbos and davening and the whole Hebrew language because the Hebrew portion of his class is simply too hard for him. He's learning to associate Judaism with "this is too hard and I'm no good at it" and secular studies with "I'm smart and capable." He might do BETTER Judaically if the academic pressure was taken off.

Chavelamomela

02-02-2009, 08:58 AM

:hug ruth.

Hi mamas.

Busy weekend.

Busy week coming up.

I hope it doesn't snow - I hate having to figure out what to do w. DS when school is closed and I have to get to work -they've been hard on me lately when I had to deal w. personal things like snow days, etc - they just expect me to be there, don't care what I have to do to make it happen, just get there.

Arg.

tikva18

02-02-2009, 09:24 AM

Hi. Feeling down right now. My kids aren't listening to us, they won't clean up after themselves and if we ask them to, we get major meltdowns from a couple of them. My house is a flying disaster. Dh notices it, butyet, won't really help clean up so I could manage. If there's one thing that I wish I had that I can't have, it's a cleaning service- and since I'm wishing, I wish they'd come at least 2 times a week. I'm in over my head. I can't keep up with the house and the kids and discipline and and and. And I'm not getting any sleep. Last night I only wokeup a few times, but the night before I couldn't sleep at all- and didn't go to sleep until 5:30 in the morning and was then awakened for the day by the kids at 7:30. So even though I woke up feeling rested this morning, exhaustion has already set back in. I have a super busy week (at least for me) with something out of the house every single day. And when do I get 'me' time? The thing is I can't take 'me' time until the house is clean because that's looming overhead - and since I can't maintain it, it's hopeless and I never ever get me time. Every single day I do the same cleaning over and over and over again. If you saw how my house looks in the morning you'd cry too. As an added bonus the twins just dumped their laundry basket of clean folded clothes upside down on the hallway floor outside of the bathroom where I took the chance and went in. They had to take that basket out of their room where I was ready to put itaway.
Now I'm so upset that I don't want to do anything. Just quit.

RachelEve14

02-02-2009, 09:38 AM

Ruthla

02-02-2009, 09:41 AM

:Hug Rivka

I think you need to make some "me time" no matter what's going on with the house.

It also sounds like you need a family meeting with everybody old enough to do some chores. You need to let your DH and older kids know that you can't keep up with the housework and NEED help with it. Even the twins could possibly put away their own laundry if you supervised (not that this would be any less work than doing it yourself, but it keeps them occupied while laundry gets put away, and then gets them in the habit of helping so they can do it independently as soon as they're fully capable of doing so.)

But really, you need to nurture yourself or everything will fall apart. If you took time to take care of YOU, I suspect that many of the household problems would fall into place. Kids tend to listen better to a Mom who's not stressed out.

Make sure you're getting plenty of B vitamins- I would take a B-50 pill once or twice a day in addition to any multivitamins you may be already taking. Magnesium at night can help you sleep.

Ruthla

02-02-2009, 09:59 AM

Ruth :Hug

There is no other option for him? No other Jewish school who can work with you on tuition? I guess if you are going to try PS, next year would be a good time to try. Have you given more thought to letting him stay home and unschool next year?
I know that homeschooling would be a good fit for him academically (and it drives me NUTS the way schools turn learning into a chore!) but I'm not sure what that would do to my relationship with him, or how it might interfere with my learning with DDs.

He's a normal, healthy 7yo boy. He's loud, bouncy, and needs lots of stimulation. I have Fibromyalgia, a chronic ear problem and I need lots of quiet time. I CANNOT function if I'm overstimulated- and DS being too loud/bouncy/in my face early in the morning can set me up where I'm just cranky and overwhelmed the entire day. So, even if he is able to entertain himself (which he's not always capable of doing) it's very likely to be done in a way that pushes me past my innate limits.

I'm able to HS DD2 because she's a lot like me. She can get bouncy/fidgety at times, but she respects my personal space because her needs for personal space are even greater. She is as easily overwhelmed by DS as I am- and there's no way I'd be able to meet her needs if DS was here all the time. It's hard enough meeting DD2's needs with DD1 around- and DD1 is the kind of kid who can thrive anywhere. We're almost defintely putting her back in school next year; we're just not sure which one.

I can't handle DD2 and DS home at the same time. Besides the fact that DD2 is easier for me to deal with all day than DS is, the fact remains that DS can get his needs met at school but DD2 can't. Even without the "whole family's needs to consider" I'm not sure I'd do better for DS than school can, even if the school doesn't meet his needs perfectly.

gilamama

02-02-2009, 07:42 PM

I am worried about his Yiddishkeit- how he'll function as a Jew when he's in a secular environment all day-
probly poorly at imtes, probly okay at others
will he be willing to wear tzitzit or a kippa to school?
it might be a fight sometimes, that the kippa/tzis tis would loose ocationally.
Should I make him daven before school in the mornings?
is that some thing you feel capable of? how important is that to you?
Is he going to feel "left out" of non-kosher celebrations or discussions of things that take place on Shabbos?
absolutely, without a doubt.

Ruth, each school has its pros and its cons. the question is not which is innately better. the question is which pros are the ikar (main thing) and which cons are tafel (subordinate). we just decided to send dd to a school a 50 minute school but ride away. this means not seeing her from 7:10 till almost 4 every day. :bawl but the school is a much better fit for our family than the one closer with a shorter day. what is the right choice for him has to do with his personality and with the friends you want him influenced by and by what fits with your family. he should fit in at school and at home.

Nickarolaberry

02-03-2009, 06:40 AM

Ruth, what about the JA in East Northport? I know they are very generous with scholarships.

If that doesn't work out for some reason, you will basically be committing yourself to a very intensive effort to shore up his connection to Yiddishkeit on a daily basis -- esp. if he's in public school. It's not impossible, but it is a real challenge.

Whatever his issues with reading Hebrew etc. now, it has to be separated from his spiritual connection to Yiddishkeit. Get the CD A New Day (http://store.kehotonline.com/index.php?stocknumber=CD-NEWD&deptid=5791&parentid=10004&page=2&itemsperpage=10) to help him with davening (it's a Shacharis CD -- put out by Chabad, but whether that's your particular Nusach or not it's a very nice compilation) especially if he relates better through music than through trying to sound out the words.

Some things will have to be nonnegotiable -- he makes morning brachos (including tzitzis) whether or not he wears them to school; brachos on foods; etc.

I'm sure your local Chabad has an after-school/Sunday enrichment for public schooled kids, right? He'd need to be involved (they make it fun). Esp. so he has a connection still.

Basically you'll have to homeschool Yiddishkeit/Hebrew and/or get a tutor once he's big enough to start with the stuff you don't know (Mishnayos, etc.).

Sorry you're going through this mama. :hug

On the up side, it does I suppose force a person to clarify what's a priority and what's not, in terms of being mechanech (educating) in Yiddishkeit.

Ruthla

02-03-2009, 09:17 AM

julie128

02-03-2009, 12:51 PM

Ruth, you might consider public school and Sunday School and CAMP! The best Jewish times I've had were at a Jewish overnight camp. And yes, camps have scholarships. Some are even kosher and shomer Shabbat.

Thanks to those who answered my Yahoo questions. I'm still undecided, but it's nice to know that he'd look normal in Israel!

I'm doing something cool. A couple weeks ago, a family we know had twins via surrogate. The mom is taking medications that she thinks won't allow her to breastfeed (I had asked a couple months ago if she wanted to work with me on relactating). I didn't check on the meds as she seemed fine with it. Then more recently, I asked if she would like me to pump milk for the babies, and she and her dh said yes. So I'm pumping (they rented the pump) about 2-3 times a day for the babies. My goal is at least 4 ounces a day, so they can each have 2. I'm not sure how long I'll be willing to do it, but they are happy with whatever I can give them.

Ruthla

02-03-2009, 01:34 PM

Julie- overnight camps start at age 9 I think, and the day camps around here don't offer scholarships. The sleepaway camp DDs went to might make an exception for an almost 9yo entering 4th grade (since most 4th graders are already 9) but that's still another year away- he just turned 7 in November. And I wouldn't even CONSIDER an overnight camp that wasn't kosher or Shomer Shabbos.

That's so cool about pumping for your friend's twins!

Nickarolaberry

02-03-2009, 03:09 PM

Oh, right, I forgot about that school in East Northport. I'd dismissed it years ago because they didn't offer classes old enough for my daughters (each year they add a grade) but it's definitely an option for DS. I'm pretty sure that's in bussing distance too.

We all went there for Purim a few years ago and I was impressed with the feeling of the place. But then I realized they had nothing for DD1 and DD2 and kind of forgot about them (at the time DS wasn't even in preschool yet.)

It's a phenomenal place, IMO. If we had moved out there, I would have chosen it over the school your ds currently attends. It's as close to homeschooling as you can get in a school environment, b/c of the individualized attention. Their facilities are amazing and their understanding of child development is also really impressive.

You know, the school your ds is at now is an Oorah school. Is it possible Oorah would help you with tuition?

Ruthla

02-03-2009, 03:12 PM

I'm not sure if Oorah is currently helping or not, quite honestly. The whole tution paperwork thing is such a mess. I do recall getting a rejection letter from Oorah, but that might have been last year?

Nickarolaberry

02-03-2009, 03:14 PM

Call the JA today. They are super nice. It's worth a shot, for sure.

LambQueen

02-03-2009, 10:01 PM

Hey mamas. I just got back from an amazing shiur given over by Neilah Carlebach. It's so good to get some torah learning these days when they seemed filled with the mundane household chores!

Let's let that sap flow in all of us and be true to who we are!

LambQueen

02-03-2009, 10:56 PM

Who remembers there used to a be a web site called "Good SHabbos' or something like that where you could register yourself online to be a part of an online commuinty, if people are passing through your town then you would be willing to help out with shabbos hospitality. Anyone recall this, and is it still around?

imnottelling

02-04-2009, 10:09 AM

gilamama

02-04-2009, 12:37 PM

julie that is such a huge chesed you are doing to pump for those babies!

crazy_eights

02-04-2009, 01:00 PM

Ruthla

02-04-2009, 03:53 PM

You seem like a perfect candidate for Oorah.
Yeah, except for the fact that DS has never been in public school, and their goal is to get kids from public school into Jewish schools. Then they hope parents will decide that Jewish school is so wonderful that they'll make room for tuition in their budgets. Except, of course, for those of us with no wiggle room in the budget to begin with.

crazy_eights

02-04-2009, 05:55 PM

I don't know about that. That might be thier stated mission, but they list the schools where kids get tuition assistance and one of my kids' schools is listed. Trust me, there is no one at that school who would have their kid in public school. Plenty of shomer shabbos kids are not found worthy, if you get my drift. They want to keep out "certain influences" (and before you jump on me for having kids there, let's just say it was the lesser of two evils).

Ruthla

02-04-2009, 07:30 PM

"Not worthy" of school admission, or "not worthy" of Oorah assistance?

crazy_eights

02-04-2009, 08:45 PM

"Not worthy" of school admission, i.e. "we don't won't those influences here". And that's not public school kids I'm talking about.

gilamama

02-05-2009, 01:17 PM

chava the article in your second link in your siggy is not viewable. the headline is, but the article needs to be purchased. you might want to reconsider in in your siggy.

julie128

02-05-2009, 02:08 PM

crazy_eights

02-05-2009, 02:15 PM

chava the article in your second link in your siggy is not viewable. the headline is, but the article needs to be purchased. you might want to reconsider in in your siggy.
Fixed it - found the same article from a secondary source.

Ruthla

02-05-2009, 03:08 PM

http://www.mysummercamps.com/cgi-bin/camps/search.cgi?catid=179&d=1&query=&CampState=New+York
The above link is for Jewish overnight camps in NY. At the camps in CA, you have to be entering 2nd grade for their one or two week sessions. DD1 could have gone last year. You can check for kosher/shomer Shabbat.

DS woke up.

adding: another hs friend died last month. this one i'd spent even less time with, but i remember that he had a heart of gold. :Hug Julie. I'm so sorry for your loss.

I'll research those camps, but honestly I'm not sure DS is ready for that. He still wants to snuggle with me every night, plus another snuggle in the mornings before school!

I'm having even more school troubles right now. He got into a physical fight with a classmate yesterday. Nothing like getting a phone call from another parent at dinnertime saying "my kid's in pain and he tells me your kid did this to him." So I spoke to DS and found out the trouble started at recess, when the other kid got too close while DS was playing foosball, and DS accidentally poked one of the foosball sticks into the other kid's stomach. Then they started yelling at and punching one another. Then the lady from the office saw them fighting, spoke to them about it, and then when they left the office, they continued fighting.

Why on earth didn't the SCHOOL call me about this? Why didn't the other child go to the nurse if he was hurt?

Last night DS was just too angry to do any of his homework. He needed extra snuggles so I gave them to him. I'm still not usre if he was angry about the other kid hurting him, or angry that I found his behavior unacceptable. Then I let him sleep in this morning because he was still tired and wanted to snuggle, and I just didn't think it would be good to fight with him about getting to school on time today, not when he'd have to face this other child- DS needed to calm down and "fill up his love tanks" before dealing with school again. Plus the fact that he's struggling in his Hebrew class can't help his overall mood.

So I drove him into school today about 2 hours late, and had a talk with both the vice principal (the principal wasn't available) and the lady in the office who was involved yesterday. It turns out that she didn't want to "turn them into the principal and get them both in trouble" so she tried to handle it herself. I told her not to do that again- I would have MUCH rather been called into the school at noon to deal with DS right when it happened, and with both parties available to tell their sides of the story. I do not tolerate any kind of violence from DS and I don't want the school to take this lightly either.

imnottelling

02-06-2009, 10:06 AM

(I asked my husband about maaser for tuition, and he said tuition is a chiyuv, maaser is not. If one wants to feel good that they gave maaser when paying for tuition, fine, but since maaser does not have to be given, it wouldn't count as coming from our wanting to give. I disagree, but so sayeth the guy who makes these decisions in my home.)

crazy_eights

02-06-2009, 10:17 AM

Ma'aser isn't aon obligation?

julie128

02-06-2009, 03:44 PM

:Hug Ruth and DS

:RainbowShabbat shalom!:Rainbow

RachelEve14

02-09-2009, 04:27 AM

Hey Everyone. Sorry I've been kind of MIA. Real life interfereing again :lol

חג טו בשבט שמח

Happy Tu B'Shvat!

imnottelling

02-09-2009, 11:19 AM

Ma'aser isn't aon obligation?

IIRC, the chiyuv is on produce, not money. In this day and age, it's something we try to do from our monetary income, but not an actual chiyuv.

smeisnotapirate

02-09-2009, 12:13 PM

IIRC, the chiyuv is on produce, not money. In this day and age, it's something we try to do from our monetary income, but not an actual chiyuv.

Really? What if you garden to provide yourself with food? Is it applicable then?

crazy_eights

02-09-2009, 12:57 PM

Really? What if you garden to provide yourself with food? Is it applicable then?
Seems that ma'aser is a matter of dispute. There's an interesting bit here (http://www.torah.org/advanced/weekly-halacha/5763/mishpatim.html#)

imnottelling

02-10-2009, 10:46 AM

Really? What if you garden to provide yourself with food? Is it applicable then?

Ok, I might have confused maaser kesafim (tithing money) with maaser oni (tithing to the poor) which is of produce, but I think it's something dependent on Israel.

Thanks for the link, Chava.

smeisnotapirate

02-12-2009, 05:32 PM

Hello?

Ruthla

02-12-2009, 05:49 PM

Bueller? Bueller? :lol

DS got in another fight at school today. :( (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=1041238)

julie128

02-12-2009, 06:39 PM

Recently I learned that our hypnobirthing teacher and labor coach for dd2's birth died last summer. and my dad's gir;friend's father died. no one i knew well, but the bodies just keep piling up. ds is sick-gtg.

Ruthla

02-12-2009, 06:43 PM

:Hug Julie

imnottelling

02-13-2009, 10:11 AM

Recently I learned that our hypnobirthing teacher and labor coach for dd2's birth died last summer. my midwife's assistant who caught my second son at home died 3 months later in a vehicular accident :( It was so sudden and so shocking, and she was so good. It took me a while to get over it, but I still haven't found anyone I liked as much :(

smeisnotapirate

02-13-2009, 11:12 AM

That's terrible. :hug

Ruthla

02-13-2009, 12:53 PM

my midwife's assistant who caught my second son at home died 3 months later in a vehicular accident :( It was so sudden and so shocking, and she was so good. It took me a while to get over it, but I still haven't found anyone I liked as much :(
:Hug

Faliciagayle

02-13-2009, 02:33 PM

I know it's already Shabbat for some of you, however I wanted to share a great story before we settle in

Today I was standing in the doorway to DDs room while speaking with DH; and DD put out her hand, touched her mezzuzah, and kissed her hand. :joy::joy::joy: :love :love :love

DH and and I started laughing and smiling and hugging. It was wonderful.

ETA: DD is almost 17 mo and was on the hip at the time.

Ruthla

02-13-2009, 03:47 PM

Aww, how sweet!

tikva18

02-15-2009, 03:09 PM

Humph, what do you know? I must have been unsubscribed.

Anyway, here I am...

julie128

02-16-2009, 02:12 PM

Mama Shifra

02-17-2009, 08:52 AM

Ruthla, have you ever read a book called The Wonder of Boys by Michael Gurian? I read it while pregnant with DS, and I thought it was, well, wonderful. A real insight into what boys need. You might like it. Your library might have it.

If we are mentioning books about how boys learn, I just read Bringing the Best Out in Boys: Communication Strategies for Teachers by Lucinda Neall. It is a British book, so it discusses the British school system, but the problems of boys in school are universal. It's a great book but expensive. I got it interlibrary loan.

Mimi

02-17-2009, 04:34 PM

Hello everyone!
I found my way here! ( thank you, Faliciagayle ! )
I am Miriam , mother of two , married to Anthony.
We live in the south of england.
At the moment I am trying to find out how to make 30 groggers (for a german playgroup who don't even know i am jewish! (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?p=13207370#post13207370)) ready in time for purim, & I just don't have a clue how to!
How are you all today?

Ruthla

02-17-2009, 04:46 PM

I've made groggers out of empty toilet paper rolls- tape up the end, fill with beads or dry beans, then tape up the other end and decorate them; but I would need some advanced planning to collect 30 empty rolls.

Mimi

02-17-2009, 04:49 PM

yes, same for the yoghurt cups another mama mentioned, i have no way of getting 30 of those.
plus it really needs to be fantastic , because if i am going to be branded as "that jewish one" then i might as well do it right, no?

smeisnotapirate

02-17-2009, 05:26 PM

You can do a combination of anything you can fill for a grogger. Make them unique.

Just curious - why do you think everyone will have such a negative reaction to you being Jewish? Most people I've met (in an overwhelmingly X-tian area) are curious and interested.

SaraFR

02-17-2009, 06:00 PM

You can have the kids decorate paper plates, fill them and staple two together. If you get stickies, foamies or other fun things it might be extra exciting. Maybe you can have them make faces (googly eyes?) or animals on them (or some other theme).

tikva18

02-17-2009, 06:02 PM

the groggers don't have to be so big... you could cut a toilet paper roll in half - thereby cutting your need down to 15 - and ask your neighbors to save you some.

Or, you could take a package of paper plates - staple them in half and then fill them through an opening, finish stapling, decorate, and voila.

julie128

02-17-2009, 06:19 PM

Welcome, Miriam. You can also make nice groggers out of plastic spice containers. I second the suggestion to use a number of different grogger materials. If you can get any yogurt cups with clear lids, then the kids can see the beads/beans/rice/whatever.

My mother in law is having surgery for breast cancer tomorrow. *sigh*

CarsonBookworm

02-18-2009, 01:24 AM

Hi everyone....

I have a question. I'm (re-) starting my custom Judaica business and want to call it Firefly Garden. Or גן גחלילית in Hebrew. But how do you pronounce גחלילית ? I am assuming "Gachlailyot", but my Hebrew reading skills are abysmal and if anyone could point out the correct pronounciation ( and transliteration) I'd be grateful.

Thanks

Mimi

02-18-2009, 01:41 AM

I like the paper plate idea! :)
oh, i think they will be scared more than anything, in german school we learned nothing but guilt about everything to do with the jewish people, so i guess they will probably avoid me. well, the ones i don't know, anyway :)

Mimi

02-18-2009, 06:44 AM

LookMommy!

02-18-2009, 06:56 AM

puppet show? Kids learn more by seeing then by hearing.

Maybe torahtots.com will have an explanation. I'm sure you can google around for something you like.

And no one should have a problem with Purim - it's not like you're doing Yom Kippur or even worse - Yom HaShoah:eyesroll (Holocaust Remembrance Day)

As for graggers, I think my post was that the parents won't resent the hamentashchen, just STAY AWAY from giving the kids noisemakers! (For parenting reasons, not religious ones). But if you want to be Davka*...

Happy Purim!:joy::joy:

* spiteful, daring

Mimi

02-18-2009, 07:07 AM

toda, puppet show is sweet, would just need to make puppets :) i looked on thoratots & it assumes at least some knowledge of the thora, which i doubt these children have ;)
as for the gift baskets, i will fill a paper plate per child with hamantashen (everyone likes a little nosh !) , & a bag of little beans + half a toilet roll etc, so that the parents can decide wether to build a noisemaker or not, that saves me work as well ;))

npl

02-18-2009, 08:51 AM

Ds's nursery class did really easy puppets for Purim last year - they just took pictures of the characters and stuck them on ice lolly sticks (popsicle for those non-Brits!). I'm sure you can find illustrations online that you can print. They made a puppet theatre from the lid of a photocopy-paper box, cut out the middle with a stanley/craft knife to make a frame, and taped two rectangles of felt to the inside top edge to make curtains.
But, depending on how many kids there will be, you might need something bigger than that.

Off to ds's Brachos Fair!

smeisnotapirate

02-18-2009, 09:10 AM

For puppets, you can do socks or paper bags, too.

Chavelamomela

02-18-2009, 09:14 AM

Welcome Miriam!

I know I've been so quiet lately...my work is having its annual conference in DC next week and it's a little crazy until then...

imnottelling

02-18-2009, 11:43 AM

Well, I talked to the leaderwoman & she said it is okay, & she though hamentashen are a kind of handbag, which i think is lovely. it does make sense, because tasche does mean bag after all :D
Now, she asked me to say something about the holiday, so I am looking for a short version of it that explains it to 2 to 5 year olds.
Even though I have no trouble exlplaining it to my children, I think I will need something fairly simple, possibly with pictures. Do any of you have any fun printables or an idea how to simplify the story very much?
That would be lovely!
thank you!

http://www.aish.com/purimfamily/purimfamilydefault/Scavenger_Hunt.asp sounds cute. You print out a document with 15 clues (team up in 2s) and put it together. Although 2 year olds might have a hard time with that...
Also, these are cute coloring pages:
http://www.aish.com/purimfamily/purimfamilydefault/Purim_Coloring_Pages.asp
(Actually the whole section might be a good resource)
They have the story, but you'd have to dumb it down a lot. Cute pics in it too.

kroonkles

02-18-2009, 01:17 PM

Here's a great resource for Purim: chabad.org/kids (http://www.chabad.org/kids/article_cdo/aid/354749/jewish/Purim.htm)

Mimi

02-18-2009, 01:57 PM

thank you so much!!
I will print out some colouring pages for each basket, too :)
you are all so lovely, i don't know why i did not come here earlier.
you make me feel at home.

Mimi

02-19-2009, 06:40 AM

smeisnotapirate

02-19-2009, 08:17 AM

I think i will explain it with a little song & puppets, no killing or anything, jsut htat song that goes
king achashverosh had a big feast
he told his wife vashti to come
she had many pimples , a hundred at least,
& said i can't join in your fun..

it ends in "i'm proud,so proud to be a jew"
but it is so very harmless,isn't it?
I think that's probably enough?

Of course it's harmless! It's Purim! It's about having fun and not being afraid to be yourself, even when you're a minority. Sounds like a great lesson. :wink

imnottelling

02-19-2009, 01:06 PM

Cute story:
I just got a mei tai. Not sure what took me so long, but I was surviving with a sling. Anyway, my 3 year old asked me what it was and I said it's called a mei tai. He then asked me "And what is the grey thing?" So I said "a sling". His response: "Oh, because you don't tie it?"
(It took me a split second to get his logic :))

Mimi

02-19-2009, 01:13 PM

that's so adorable!
how do you like the mei tei?
i still sew my own slings, but don't really want to MAKE a mei tei.. :/

imnottelling

02-19-2009, 02:32 PM

that's so adorable!
how do you like the mei tei?
i still sew my own slings, but don't really want to MAKE a mei tei.. :/
I LOVE it! Granted, I've had it for a day and a half, but I can comfortably make supper in it, clear the table, change my older ones into PJs. A 2 shouldered carry was needed by this point, I guess. I'm petite, and after a while, I'd have to put down the sling. I think I'd still use the sling for newborns, as it's a cinch to get on and nurse in, but for long term wearing and older babies, the MT is going to be my go-to carrier.
Officially, the Kozy website (what I got) said it wasn't really made for the baby to face out, but so far, I've been mainly doing that as I have yet to learn how to quickly out it on my back, and my daughter likes to look out. She was not so keen on the hip hold. I have to give it more time, but I don't know how I survived without it till now.

tikva18

02-19-2009, 03:02 PM

that's so adorable!
how do you like the mei tei?
i still sew my own slings, but don't really want to MAKE a mei tei.. :/
I had a ring sling when my twins were small and then got a mei tai after. Now I have two. I LOVED my mei tais. They were awesome. I could carry a baby for so long without back problems. (Especially, since I was really carrying two babies... one in the mei tai and one in my arms or in a second mei tai on my back). I would still totally use it and the twins are almost 3 1/2.

mamimapster

02-19-2009, 04:14 PM

Hi mamas!
checking in- very busy with school, work and DD's-starting to collect Shalos Manot items for purim-the links were great.

I can second and third the Mei Tai love-I actually used Dd #1 as a demonstration model to show my friend how to tie one the other day and she is 6! Dd #2 loves both front and back carry on the MT-question though, does anyone here have a Toddlerhawk? I have a kozy:treehugger:, but I'm considering getting a toddlerhawk so Dd #2 has more head support when sleeping.

Smithie

02-19-2009, 06:02 PM

I'm going nuts collecting Shalach Manot stuff as well!

OK, this is very last-minute but the Rabbi just told me that she could meet with me tomorrow: does anybody have any brilliant ideas for prayers, etc. at my dd's Simchat Bat? It will just be a brief 10-minute type deal as part of the regular Friday evening Shabbat service, and then my family will host the oneg. If anybody has seen this done really well, I'd love to hear about it!

Kmelion

02-20-2009, 12:35 AM

that's so adorable!
how do you like the mei tei?
i still sew my own slings, but don't really want to MAKE a mei tei.. :/

I 'made' my own wrap (ok, I bought fabric and cut it down the center.. totally a no-sew project) but when my toddler got too heavy for the stretchy material, I made a mei tai...

Super Easy Mei Tai (http://www.sleepingbaby.net/jan/Baby/bbo.html)

Here I am wearing my toddler, he was a year old in this: http://i77.photobucket.com/albums/j55/Kmelion/MeiTai.jpg

And here's what it looks like after it was sewn together: http://i77.photobucket.com/albums/j55/Kmelion/DSCF4162A.jpg

I'll admit I went a little overboard with the main panel and made it two layers of the lighter-weight poly/cotton blend with a layer of cotton duck sandwiched between... but we still use it - hubby wears him in a back carry so... we're happy.

Mimi

02-20-2009, 05:36 AM

that mei tei looks great, i might just give it a try.

I wrote a minibook for the kids at playgroup now.
Each "chapter" is 1/6th of a page, & then a little picture, so it is later folded into a mini book, so there's not a lot of detail,also no hard words like "kill" or hang".
It is a very simple version for two to 5 year olds that have probably never even met a jewish person before ;)
I'd live your opinion.
(I'm going to draw a picture to each as well.)

1. A long time ago king Achashveyrosh made a big feast.

2. He invited his wife Vashti to the feast, but she did not go.

3. The king got really sad & decided to look for a new queen.

4. He chose Esther who was jewish & lived with her uncle Mordechai.

5. One day the evil prime minister Haman told everyone "Bow down me",
but Mordechai said no.

6. Haman was so angry that he wanted to send all jewish people away,
but Esther convinced her husband the king to send Haman away instead.

what do you think? Simple enough? I based it on the song we are going to sing, to sort of explain it a little more without going into detail. I am so nervous, so unsure as well.

Chavelamomela

02-20-2009, 09:37 AM

Very nice MT kmelion!

I loved my RS's when ds was small, then loved my MT (I have a Sachi). We're mostly done with BWing except for the random hike or time that ds wants to be worn (he's almost 4), but when I IY"H have another baby (one of these days), I'll have the internal debate of whether to get another sling, a mei tei, or just stick with my current stash. (I always wanted a silk sling, but I have 2 good ones that work well and are attractive enough, and the Sachi MT is a pretty floral that I've worn to weddings). So anything more is just...pure indulgence:D. IY"H I should be able to have such 'hard' decisions to make soon!

****

Herewearetogether, That's cute! I like it!

I would add maybe one more point: All the Jews made a celebration called Purim because we were saved from wicked Haman.

Ruthla

02-20-2009, 09:44 AM

Cute mezuza story!
My mother has these glass mirrors in her house, and the handles are these rectangular glass pieces. My kids would touch them and then kiss their fingers saying they were mezuzot.
Ruthla, have you ever read a book called The Wonder of Boys by Michael Gurian? I read it while pregnant with DS, and I thought it was, well, wonderful. A real insight into what boys need. You might like it. Your library might have it.
I'm in the middle of that right now- I got it from the library, but it's really annoying me!

First of all, half of what it's describing as "typical male behavior, as distinguished from typical female behavior" describes DD2 a lot better than it describes DS! :lol And a lot of the other things it describes seem like stuff I already know (give him the security so he can be independent, don't hold him back if he wants to separate) and is general good advice for parenting girls or boys. And a lot of what's written there just doesn't apply to my situation at all (DS isn't a teenager going to a school with lots of gang activity.)

I guess it's just not what I need right now- perhaps if I'd read it when I needed more "general parenting advice" it would have been more helpful. I do plan to skim through it and see if there's anything else in there that might be helpful, but what I've read so far hasn't been particularly useful to me.

I've updated the other thead (http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=1041238) with details about what happened when I met his school principal.

Mimi

02-20-2009, 10:04 AM

i wrote, drew, cut & glued 27 books now. :D
if you want to see my book, here it is. (http://flickr.com/photos/herewearetogether/sets/72157614155115010/) :)

Shabbat shalom, my dear friends!

Chavelamomela

02-20-2009, 11:24 AM

i wrote, drew, cut & glued 27 books now. :D
if you want to see my book, here it is. (http://flickr.com/photos/herewearetogether/sets/72157614155115010/) :)

Wow! Those look great! I hope the other parents appreciate all your effort!

julie128

02-20-2009, 08:12 PM

The Blessing of the Sun will be this year! So exciting!
http://www.chabad.org/library/article_cdo/aid/820928/jewish/FAQs.htm

Sorry that book isn't working out for you, Ruth. I liked when he talks about how a boy needs to be a hero. That was a real insight into the male psyche.

DD1 is so excited about a homework project she's working on: she's making a book about orange trees for Hebrew class. I'm so happy she likes her homework.

Ruthla

02-22-2009, 05:23 PM

Smeisnotapirate- I saw you mention on another thread that you're WAH now- I wasn't aware of that! So you're no longer working for your synagogue?

smeisnotapirate

02-22-2009, 08:22 PM

No, I'm still working for the synagogue - they only have me working there two days a week, though, and I'm working from home for the rest.

imnottelling

02-23-2009, 10:10 AM

Does anyone know if you can tie a knot on a mei tai on Shabbos? My husband told me to just tie a bow, but it's not as sturdy at all.

RachelEve14

02-23-2009, 10:48 AM

Does anyone know if you can tie a knot on a mei tai on Shabbos? My husband told me to just tie a bow, but it's not as sturdy at all.

My Rav said you can tie a scarf in a double knot if you are afraid it will come off with a single or a bow. I never asked about the MT, but I do tie it in a double knot. He said if the kavana isn't that it's supposed to be permanent, just that it should stay for the time being, it's not considered permanent. Let me know if you find something else out.

smeisnotapirate

02-23-2009, 11:21 AM

Wow, this past weekend was crazy. We crammed seeing a house, putting an offer on it, religious school (normal), a rehearsal with the youth group for their service on Friday, and Purimspiel rehearsal all into yesterday. Nuts. I just want to fall over.

BUT the good thing is that we find out today if the guy accepts our offer - so that's cool. The guy we're buying from is Mennonite (Old Order) and their family observes a strict sabbath on Sunday. The realtor kept apologizing for the delay and explaining that he was very religious, and I told him that it was absolutely fine - we'd do the same on a Saturday. It was kinda funny, actually.

Oh, and for those who are interested, our Purimspiel is on Sunday, March 8 at 3pm and Monday, March 9 at 7. We're doing "My Fair Esther" this year - based on "My Fair Lady," and I'm playing King Achashveyrosh. "Why Can't a Woman Be More Like a Man" is kicking my butt. That's a hard song to memorize!

If anyone wants a fun road trip or will be in the Lancaster area, you should come down. I can help with cheap lodging. It'll be a hoot. Rated PG this year.

SaraFR

02-23-2009, 12:41 PM

I never demonstrated it in front of my Rav but based on describing it over the phone I was told I couldn't.

crazy_eights

02-23-2009, 12:57 PM

My Rav said you can tie a scarf in a double knot if you are afraid it will come off with a single or a bow. I never asked about the MT, but I do tie it in a double knot. He said if the kavana isn't that it's supposed to be permanent, just that it should stay for the time being, it's not considered permanent. Let me know if you find something else out.
There are those that say if you intend to unknot it again, it is not a problem (not a permanent knot).

Chavelamomela

02-23-2009, 01:38 PM

I was told I can make a slip knot (not pulled all the way through) and that's secure.

imnottelling

02-23-2009, 03:05 PM

There are those that say if you intend to unknot it again, it is not a problem (not a permanent knot).
That's what I tried to reason, but my husband didn't think so.
He does hold I can do double knots for my son as it causes tzaar if the shoelaces get untied. Shouldn't this be the same? ;)

I'll have to try a slip knot, chavela. Thanks.

RachelEve14

02-25-2009, 02:23 AM

Chodesh Tov ladies. I started a new thread (for the very first time!)

It's Adar!!! (http://mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?p=13254305#post13254305)

jjrsgirl

02-28-2009, 07:14 AM

Recently found out we're expecting again and this will be Daniel's first Purim. I'm kind of at a loss as to where to go / what to do since I grew up with a secular Jewish mother and I am still trying to find where I belong.

DH and I have been going to a Reform shul, thus far, but for some reason it's just not fitting well. I'd like to make sure Daniel gets a festive, fun Purim. Any ideas? :joy:

smeisnotapirate

02-28-2009, 11:12 AM

Lots of ideas!

(*Hi Jenna!* :wave)

costume/costume parade
groggers/shakers/some sort of noisemakers
read a kid's version of the purim story to him

Not sure where he is w/solid foods, but if he's interested and you're ok with it, you can get a recipe for hamentaschen and make it with no-sugar added jelly (better for him than store-bought, since he's little).

My DS is the same age (born June 4, 08), and we have tons of fun stuff planned. If you want to do Purim with a group, or if your synagogue doesn't have stuff planned, ours is only 2 hours away (I know a trip with a little guy can be twice as long) and we're having lots of Purim festivities for the little ones and then our spiel for the grown-ups (which, of course, anyone is invited to). We're affiliated with the URJ, but lean much more to the Conservative side in actual practice. We're having a kids' megilla reading Monday night before the adult spiel, and it's always loud, boisterous, and full of kids and grown-ups in costume, shaking groggers or homemade noisemakers.

I think it's hard to do something like Purim without a community, but you can. If you want more specific ideas, PM me! I <3 Purim (if you couldn't tell :lol)!