there IS someone in there!

[wolfmom]

I just had my first appointment with the midwife and i heard the heartbeat!! I am so happy and so relieved! I know this sounds crazy but i know you ladies will understand - I almost felt like i was lying when i would say that i was pregnant 'cause i wasn't sure there was anyone "in there". i am especially happy 'cause 2 more days and i will be past my m/c date. now i feel like i might actually get to hold this baby some day! thanks to all who gave me support!
peace and health,

[karenpl]

Congratulations, Jenny!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What a wonderful news, I am so happy for you!!!!

Karen

[its_our_family]

How very very exciting or you!!! I didn't even know you were pg again!!

Have a great holiday!!

[Jacque Savageau]

Great news! I wish you the best!

[wolfmom]

thanks for the responses ladies! it's so nice to know that someone reads my posts. i had a very positive thought yesterday. with my last pregnancy i felt guilty saying i was pregnant 'cause i felt it wasn't true (the baby had been gone for a long time before i knew it) but as i was writing thankyou notes i felt guilty not including a name for this baby when signing my family's name. how's that for knowing in my heart that this baby is ok? it's like he/she is constantly saying, 'dont forget about me!'
i just thought that was cool!
peace,

[AdronsCatherine]

That is so wonderful!!! I totally know what you mean - since I don't "feel" pregnant, it really seems wierd telling people that I am. Never mind that I had an ultrasound a month ago, and saw the heartbeat..... Congratulations!!!!

[Jacque Savageau]

Jenny, I'm glad you're feeling positive. I can TOTALLY relate to what your saying :hug I know I've spoken with a few other women on these boards who said the same thing - that they just knew that the baby they lost was not going to come to them and the subsequent baby would somehow be ok.

My entire pregnancy with Amanda I just 'knew' something was not right. I remember when I was about 7 months along I had some overwhelming feelings one day and left work. I spent the day at a park crying because I knew something was not right.

With my son, I was scared the entire pregnancy, but I had this odd calm. I just knew he was ok and that I would have him in my arms - he just turned 9 last week!

I think that's why I've always referred to Amanda as my 'spirit child' she seems to have been a soul that came to me but could not stay - she tought me how delicate and beautiful life can be.

[mammabean]

Oh jenny! I am so happy for you! I truly understand what you are saying about feeling like you "lied" about being pregnant.

Sometimes I feel like my pregnancy was a dream and I was never pregnant at all. But at the same time, sometimes I remember that my baby was truly a real person growing inside me and had the same potential for for being birthed into this world just as my son was. He/she just didn't get the chance to grow and be birthed. When I think about that it really hits me that I lost my son or my daughter, and it is hard.

But I am so hopeful for the future and it makes me more hopeful everytime I read happy posts like yours!!!

forgive me for saddening the thread, if I did. Bless you and your child inside. Keep us posted on your progress!!

much love,

[wolfmom]

don't worry mammabean, you didn't sadden me! I just think it's so great that we can share these feelings in such a safe and supportive environment. i still get sad about my last baby, and have fears for this one but i just try and stay positive and take the feelings as they come.
peace and health,

[Jacque Savageau]

Jenny, thank you for your words. I do think it's important to voice our feelings. One of the beautiful things about this forum is that its a place where we can talk about our feelings and help each other work through them.

Michelle :hug Nothing to forgive. Pregnancy after loss can bring on so many emotions. You can feel very up and positive one moment and the next.......

Glad everyone is doing well in general. I'm going to bump up some of the pregnancy after loss threads here for you to read through. You'll see that many members here have felt the same fears as you and also the joys.