Reoccurring nightmares about returning to work

[zipworth]

Let me just start by saying I suffer from an anxiety disorder. So if my worries seem a little unreasonable, please take this into consideration.

My maternity leave is over in 4 months, but already I am having nightmares about leaving my son. I am lucky to have a whole year off, but unless my DH gets a spectacular job in the next four months I will have to return to work. Although I consider myself very good at my job as an early childhood educator, my job situation before I went on maternity leave was very stressful and I was quite unhappy. I think it contributed to my son coming over a month early.

My biggest fear is that I am worried about leaving my son, even though my very loving and gentle mother will be taking care of him for me. I am going to really miss him. I love the time, although it is at times lonely, that I get to spend with him every day. I loved children anyway, before I became a mom. I never knew how much more I would love my own child!

I am worried he will miss me. He loves my mom and can be comforted by her but I feel like my little son needs me, his mama.

I am trying to find a job that will pay more, but will be less hours, so I don't have to be away for so long. I am also finding this stressful. It doesn't help that I finally tweaked my resume, only to lose the file on my computer !

Has anyone else had these concerns and returned to work only to find that thier fears were unfounded? What were you experiences? Any stories or words of encouragement would be very welcome!

Thank You,
Natalie

[Piglet68]

Well, I'm not sure if this is exactly the same situation. I really loved my job before I had DD, but I knew I wanted to stay home with her, so I did. When she was around a year I began to miss work.

The day I phoned my boss and asked if it would be possible to come back, I was really nervous. He seemed excited about the idea. When I got off the phone I was ecstatic and so excited. That's how I knew this was right for me to do. Still, I would only commit to six months. I wanted to give myself an escape route.

I worried alot. I worried she'd miss me, that she wouldn't nap for DH (she nurses to sleep), that I'd miss her too much, that I'd regret going back...but it has all worked out great. I am really enjoying work, she and DH are having fun together, and she and I are still really closely bonded.

So there's a success story for you! :)

[zipworth]

Thanks piglet ! That's the stuff:thumb I need to hear. I think it will all turn out alright. It usually does.

[Lucky Charm]

Zip, I understand your anxiety about returning to work and missing your child. I think you might miss him very much....but him being with your wonderful gentle mom should help ease some of the stress you are feeling. Give yourself some time to adjust, and please, please do not fret and worry, instead focus on enjoying every second with your child you have before returning to work.

Many times it is harder on the mom than it is the child in these situations! they seem fine and we are the basket cases!

I myself am a working mom of three, although i work on sat & sundays. I am also a student. It all seems to work out in the end.

[zipworth]

nak

thanks to you sweetbaby, i think you are right about enjoying every moment and it being harder on mr than my babe. i appreciate hearing your calming words......thanks:) .

natalie