12 months and no nighttime routine/schedule- do we need one?

[sun-shine01]

baby girl just turned 1 and we don't have a bedtime routine for her and I'm wondering IF we need one. Do kiddos NEED a bedtime routine? She just sleeps when she is tired and that works for us. Please give me your advice.

Our day usually consists of:

9:00 - 9:30 - wake and nurse
Breakfast
Playtime
Nurse
take a walk if nice weather
lunch
between 12:00 and 1:00 nurse to sleep then nap for about 2 hours.
Nurse upon waking
playtime
swing outside
daddy comes home at 4:00 and they play while I do stuff and start dinner.
quick nurse and 30 minute nap while we eat.
Up again and playing until she nurses to sleep (when she is ready) usually about 10:30 - 11:00.

Hubby and I go to bed about midnight.

During all her naps I nurse and rock her to sleep in the living room and then carry her to a playpen. When we go to bed at night I bring her to bed with us.

Some nights we all go to bed at the same time and she will nurse and fall asleep usually within 20 minutes.

I guess my main question is - A year from now will we wished that she had a set bedtime and a routine already established?

[love2bhome]

I have the same concern as you! We don't really have a bedtime routine either. I think this is a product of the nursing to sleep but maybe someone had another explanation! We have often tried/considered a bedtime routine but it doesn't work...not if I'm in the house anyway!

We have an evening routine...but I'm not sure that's the same thing. She has a bath a 7:00 followed by a snack and then we try to get her to read till she falls asleep, never happens! We usually end up playing until she's fussy and then I BF her to sleep! Oh....my dd is also one, 13 months.

Looking forward to other suggestions or confirmation that we are not doing anything wrong!

[TiredX2]

If you're (you & DH) happy and baby is healthy I don't think there is anything wrong with what you are doing. Seems like a light schedule that you are letting baby set.

It does get harder when your kids are 5 & 2, though, and still deciding their own schedules :rolleyes:

[mamabutterfly]

Just my opinion, but now that I have a toddler, I think that yeah, you'll regret not having an earlier routine for her.

Babies toddlers need lots of nighttime sleep - after a while I think you'll also be glad to have the evenings while she's sleeping. I know that dinnertime nap seems great, our dd used to take it too, but since you asked I'd suggest trying to phase that out in place of an earlier bedtime.

Have you read the no-cry sleep solution (by elizabeth pantley)? I read it when my daughter was 20 months, and wished I'd worked with some of the ideas sooner.

hth,

mamabutterfly

[hotmamacita]

Originally posted by sun-shine01
I guess my main question is - A year from now will we wished that she had a set bedtime and a routine already established?

IMHO, NO.

:thumb You are doing a great job.

[Marsupialmom]

It depends; do you want time with your husband alone? We found it easiest to have “our” time by having a bed times and routine earlier than later.

Now I will admit at one point in time my oldest did not go to bed until midnight so we could be a family. I was just with what is now my husband. He worked I worked. This late bedtime routine worked for us, then. But life changed and the earlier bedtime was a must and we drifted gentlely into that.

I like having a routine of the kids to bed then one of us gets up and dh and I spend time just for us and our marriage.

Don’t forget the importance of your marriage and dh’s needs. If your routine is not working gentlely change it. You do have a routine you just don’t realize it.

[crayon]

I dont think it is really a big deal if a baby has a bedtime or not. My grandpa told my parents I am the perfect mom "If only I could get Rainey on a bedtime routine" :rolleyes: No I am the perfect mom- becuase my baby is happy and healthy and doesnt cry often and if she wants to go to bed at midnight and get up at 11 in the morning that is just fine with me! I am a morning sleeper so the longer she sleeps in the happier our house is. It reminds me of "baby wise". Where the idea is good kids have everything planned before they even get up in the morning and they WILL be in bed by 8 pm- sorry my life doesnt work like that!

I think- well DD doesnt have to get up to go to school or anything like that, she is only 9 months (and I dont see it changing when she is 12 months) so I just let her be her own person and when she is tired she lets me know and we have a little nuns and it is all good with out tears and she always wakes up with smiles- so if it is not a problem for you then it is no big deal!

As far as next year will you be wishing? I think it is more on how you view parenting- As for us, we like to have our kids up and if it is 10 and they want to be up, that is fine. They have their own clock and if you let kids they will listen to it and go to bed when they are tired. DP never had a bed time and his dad tells me stories of them asking if they could go to bed because they were tired. I think- at least for now (when they are still toddlers and babies) it is nothing to fight about or worry about.

Hugs!