Somethings gotta give...

[Free Thinker]

I am getting more and more exhausted every day. DD is waking several times a night (I don't even count them). I thought that is was a growth spurt, then I chaulked it up to the holidays, and now I have nothing to blame. We do put her to bed in the crib, and then she used to wake about 5:00. and get in bed w/ us. Now she is awake at all hours of the night, even if I have her in bed w/ us. I think it is better w/ her in her own crib, she doesn't seem to wake as much. She is also very restless, tossing and turning (trying to take my boob w/ her :o). I can't get any rest sleeping w/ her. My DH is ready to just let her cry a while at night (as long as he can shut both doors so he won't hear.) I don't want to do that, but no one else I know has any other advice. Literally EVERYONE I have asked has said the same thing. I need to feed her a bunch of cereal right before I put her in the crib, and then let her cry an entire night (like 12 hours!) Right now this is how our schedule is going:

7:00 Eat a bit of "real food"
7:30 Bathtime
8:00 Play a minute w/ daddy
8:30 start to nurse to sleep
9:30 still nursing (yes, actually sucking)
10:00 Finally in her bed (if I'm lucky)
12:00 up again
2:30 up again (for about an hour or so nursing)
4:30 up nursing again (for an hour or more)
5:30 up fussing/nursing until she is finally awake at 7:30


DH and I go to bed about midnight, and I'm getting only about 4 hours of sleep total. I nurse her to sleep on our bed, and then put her in the crib later. When she wakes up, sometimes I nurse her in the bed in her room (twin bed) or in the living room. Sometimes I take her to my bed, but it doesn't seem to matter. She just constantly wakes up fussing. I have been thinking she is teething for like 4 weeks now :P My boobs are SORE b/c she has 7 teeth, and gets a lazy suck when she's asleep (but DON"T take that booby out of her mouth!!!) My DH is tired of hearing me whine, and wants me to just wean her if it's really that much of a problem. He is NO help in all of this. We run a business and he works 14 hours a day, and NEEDS his sleep. He only gets about 5-6 hours of sleep anyway. Please give me some tips!!! One thing I'm thinking about is putting the twin mattress on the floor of her room, and then I can let her sleep on that, and just go in and lay right down with her to nurse her. I'm concerned that she might get into something in the night sleeping on her own, though. I would need to *really* babyproof.

Oh, and DD is almost 9 months old, and is a cruising very active baby. She is on the verge of walking and has even taken a step or two on her own.

Thanks for any advice!!!

[ekblad9]

First of all, hugs to you! I've been there many times! Finally after baby #5 I had to give in and start drinking coffee!:coffee

My SIL has a one year old and swears by the book No Cry Sleep Solution. I've never read it so I can't comment but I'm sure someone can. Anyway, SIL says it's worked miracles!

My experience has been that when one of my babies is about to reach a milestone (like walking) they are up more at night. Dh may have to sleep in another bed or on the couch for a while. We've definately had to do that before. Or, you could try sleeping somewhere else and leaving baby with daddy. The baby will feel safe with daddy but not urged to wake up and nurse. We've also done that.

Good luck and you're in my thoughts!:love

[lovebugmama]

I know what a hard time you must be having. 4 hours of sleep is not enough for anyone! First thing I would do is go to bed earlier. There are so many possibilites that it's nearly impossible to find an exact cause and there may be no one cause. It is possible that your dd is teething for weeks on end. It could be food allergy/sensitivity, milestones, growth spurt, not enough napping, not enough or too much activity, disruptions in your daily schedule, the list goes on and on.

I guess I would start by looking at what is going on during the day and work back from there. Maybe transitioning your dd from bed to crib to bed to crib is preventing her from sleeping soundly.

I wouldn't bother trying to stuff your dd with cereal because it doesn't seem like a hunger thing, but rather a comfort thing. There's no way she's getting much milk from you after 20-30 mins. of nursing, just comfort at that point. On that note, how is your diet and hydration? Changes in this due to holidays or busy schedule might be causing her sleep changes.

Finally, judging by the many posts i've read from people with similar issues, it doesn't sound like anything too unusual. Unfortunately (and I know this doesn't help you!), babies change and we don't always know why. Just try to have some hope that it will change again for the better, it usually does.

Sorry that you're so tired, try to find some time to nap and take care of you!

[poppy'smama]

hi freethinker

sounds so familiar, DD is 12 months and used to sleep from 7.30-6.30 with one or two wakes for feeds in the night, however about a month ago after trip abroad and attendant jetlag she started waking all night long. Now it's every hour on the hour! I've actually worked out though that when I keep her in our bed she seems to sleep less well, (and so do i ),as she tosses and turns and keeps me awake, or I wake her by moving. The last couple of nights what I've found has worked better is to get up every hour when she wakes, (yes every hour!), go into her room and either carry her and sing lullaby, pat her back in the cot or resort to a quick suck if nothing else will work then put her back down in her cot. It does seem that she sleeps more deeply this way, and I definitely do so I don't feel as tired, as when she sleeps in our bed I was awake while she wriggled and sucked so wasn't even getting a hour at a stretch. I've worked out it's definitely not hunger as she'll just suck for a minute or two then go right back to sleep, but it's almost like excess energy that is waking her as she's wriggling around all over her bed and ours. She has just started taking a couple of steps on her own in the last week, so I'm wondering if it's to do with the walking thing, but I'd also say she's just in a habit now of waking every hour, probalby as she surfaces out of a deeper sleep cycle into a lighter one. I've just decided that if I expect to be woken every hour, the times when she doesn't I'll be really happy, and I won't resent her, and that hopefully this phase will pass soon, particularly if she's getting more and more used to going back into her own cot. I tried one night to let her cry for five minutes, but instantly realised I didn't feel comfortable with it, it went against every instinct I have, and if that's the case it ain't right, in my book!!! So I promised her I 'd never do that again, and I don't care how tired I am, I'm not going there. I guess just knowing what you are willing to accept helps, and allows you to frame it for yourself. Good luck with this, I do think it's something they can go through for a while. It is true that just when you think you're sorted and know where you stand they change everything - LOL!

Amy