going back to school

[mamaley]

I have a 3 month old daughter, who I am absolutely in love with. I can't imagine being away from her for part of the day. I also have a 3 year old son. My house is a mess all the time, and I don't have time to get a lot done as it is. So, it's only logical that I pick now to go back to school, right? :rolleyes: I've been in school for several years, taking it slow because of my son. I wouldn't even think about going back this semester, but I'm doing it because we're in student housing, we love it here and we can't afford much else right now--we could afford another apartment I guess, but this place has tons of children, is very family friendly, and great for my older son (and someday my daughter too). And it's so cheap. I have to be in school full time to stay here though, so I'm going back. I'll only be in class two days a week--3 hours in the morning, then i'll be with the baby for an hour and a half, and then i have class again for another hour and a half. Dh will watch her during that last class, and for the morning we have a sitter coming to the house. It's only twice a week. But my heart is breaking at the thought of leaving her, and I have no idea how I'm going to get homework done. Thank goodness that dh helps out a lot with the housework, but still...

Just feeling really overwhelmed right now.

[birthdancedoula]

Know how you feel, mama. My 3rd little guy is just 3 months old and I struggled with (up until today) going back to school. I was a nursing major before becoming pg w/ him. If I did go back it would mean being away for almost the entire day 5 days a week. I'd have to pump, too...and I hate pumping! I decided it was just too much on my already over full plate right now and my ds deserves all of his mama's attention.

It is so tough when you're put in a situation like yours. Do you stay and go to school- and be apart from your dd or do you leave, not go back to school, and lose out on your great housing situation? Not an easy choice for sure. My advice is do what's in your heart. While it may seem like following your heart is the harder, less reasonable choice IME you never regret it in the long run.

I hope you can find peace with your decision.

Blessings,

[UmmIlyas]

I totally understand! I took the semester off to have Ilyas - he's now 4 months old and I'm returning to school in about a week. Honestly, I don't know how I'm going to do it. I can't bear the thought of being away from him for any length of time. I have seriously considered dropping out. But I finally decided to give at least one semester a shot, then see how I feel. Hubby and I also live in student housing. You're right, it is a great place to have a kid! Our housing is also cheap and full of children. I think it's one of the few places in town where kids can play out side!

Anyways, just wanted to commiserate a bit!

Cheers

[mamaley]

nak
thanks to you both for responding. :)
umm ilyas, sounds like we're in the same boat.
i'm trying to be positive about it, but to be honest i'm not very excited about starting school.
feel free to post here if you need to vent too.

[Lucky Charm]

I just wanted to offer support and encouragement.

I do not have an infant, but i do have three kids, 4 animals, a 5 bedroom house, a parttime job and i go to school fulltime, and i volunteer at my sons school. It can be done. It does take planning and perserverance.

I cant help you with your being so sad about leaving your baby. Try however, to see it as a short amount of time, because it is, and for part of that time she is in the care of her father.

Good luck!

[mamaley]

sweetbaby3, thanks for that :)

i started last week and it's actually going well. i've only had one break down ;) it really isn't that long of a time to leave her, and we have a fun reunion on my lunch break. however, it's always a real joy to look the same age as the other undergrads in my class and then break the news that i'm married with 2 kids. not that i'm ashamed, of course, but they always have these lame responses. one girl saw my kids and husband waiting outside for me and said to her friends "uh, maybe in 10 years!" and i have to admit that it hurt my feelings a bit...i know i shouldn't care, especially since she didn't say it directly to me, and it's understandable that she would want ti wait, but the way she said it was so rude...but oh well. on the bright side, i really like my classes a lot.

[3_opihi]

Glad to hear it went ok! Well, sort of ---but only one breakdown? ---that's great in my book LOL!!!
I know how you feel. I have been trying to go to school since my 1st ds was 1. (Now he's 4). Its really hard. When I was pregnant with my second one, (who was born three weeks early -before the quarter ended!!) I ended up having a homebirth on Monday and going in to take math and psychology finals on Thursday!!! :eek Needless to say it was a little hard.
What I ended up doing was taking Distance Learning classes spring quarter, which worked out great. Is there any possibility that you could do something like that?

On the bright side, I have found that going to school is a little more flexible than working, and I've made lots of supportive friends along the way. Other student moms who have shared childcare with me and childless college friends who just love hanging out with kids. I know this isn't the point of your post. I just wanted to say I understand how hard it is to go to school with little ones.

Oops! Edited for typos..