P. E. T.

[joyful]

Can anyone tell me about Parent Effectiveness Training by Thomas Gordon? Is it a good gentle discipline book to read? I just bought it at the bookstore but have not had time to even look through it much yet. I guess with the limited amount of time I have to read (I have two little boys ages 3.5 yrs and 15 mos), I want to read something really worthwhile. Thanks in advance to anyone who can help. :)

[CerridwenLorelei]

about it-never read the book but dh and I had to take it
when we got married to "help' him adjust to being a step parent...

I remember the red workbooks a bit though...
sorry I am not help on it but you brought back a memory lol

[sparrow]

i just listened to this book on audiotape (borrowed from the library) and i thought it rocked@!

it is about learning how to problem solve together, and to use what he calls- 'the no lose method' so that getting along as a family doesn;t have to be about who is exerting more power over the other. he gives a lot of examples and i really found it worthwhile.

there is a video as well (f.e.t - family effectiveness training) which i have asked my local library to order.

enjoy it-- and if time is an issue, you should look into getting the audio tape. i listened to it with DS in the car (he's 4 tomorrow) and he thinks that a way of working out problems where nobody loses is a wonderful idea! he would ask me to put it on when we would drive somewhere together LOL

good luck

[Monica]

I took the class with dh when our ds was 3. It is awesome definitly should be "required" parent reading! It is all about respecting you child as a person, the decisions they make, how to problem solve, active listen and so on. I have it on tape and listen to it frequently when i need a little parenting boost and I have the book though have not read it cover to cover. What sticks with me most was the one little lesson on anger (mine) and how most of my anger as a parent is a secondary reaction to being embarrassed (by ds's behavior) or scared (when he pushes dd off the bed). It has really helped me step back and get my own feelings in check before I go and flame on my kid. It has also helped me remember that ds does not have all of the social etiquettes inherent just because he seems like a little adult. He is 4 and sometimes he does something and I get angry but that it isn't a fair reaction because he didn't know he was commiting a grievence. I see many more opportunities to teach and try to peacefully impart my values. Get to reading it, you will really enjoy it. Oh, and ds now uses a lot of it on us :D He is an excellent negotiator and problem solver when it is in his best interest:D

[joyful]

Thank you all so much for the replies. I can't wait to get to reading this book now! I thought it looked and sounded really good, but I wanted to get the opinions of some other like minded mamas first. Are there any other must reads that you can recommend for parents of preschoolers? Thanks again for your help and replies! :)