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charlottesmom
02-25-2004, 01:18 PM
SIL is expecting her second child in about a month via c-section, she has PPD with her first, and I worry she may suffer again.

Please tell me what some warning signs are. What do I so as a SIL to help her with this? I begged her to be pro-active and get help now, before the baby comes, get councelling and even medication-She will not medicate!

I feel strongly that she would really benifit from anti-depressants, I know that as a society we are over medicated, and I am all for trying a holistic approach, but we are also very lucky to have the anti-depressants we have access to. I feel it is far better to get medication for PPD then to suffer and suffer, everyone in the family suffers when the mother is sick.

Your thoughts would really be helpful to me.

Alana.




Jish
02-26-2004, 10:16 AM
Go to the sticky at the top of the board and print out the PPD self assessment that is linked there. That will give you a place to start.

However, don't cause added stress in her life by worrying her about this now. She may not suffer from PPD this time, or she may suffer less. It isn't an absolute that once you suffer you will always suffer, though it is more likely.

I'd take a wait and see approach for now. I'm due in two weeks with my third and my psychiatrist and I both agree that since I'm doing fine now, taking pre-emptive measures like starting meds now isn't necessary. We will wait and see how things go. My hope is that I won't need to go back on meds, but if I do, I will.

My mother (who also suffers from depression) has been sort of bugging me a lot lately about how I'm "feeling" and trying to equate every bad mood or tired day to the depression rearing back in. That couldn't be farther from the truth. What she is succeding in doing is alienating herself from me because I resent the implication that she will be able to see my depression better than I will, and that I am somehow not strong enough to take care of myself and get help when needed. I have a wonderful dh, and my mother lives several states away. She is out of line.

Try to tread lightly for now and not worry about her. Keep your concerns to yourself for now if she doesn't want to hear them, and hope for the best. When the time comes if she needs help, be there for her. What you don't want to do is to make her resent you. Right now she is fine and to have someone worrying about your mental health when you are in a good place can be really frustrating and demeaning. I'm not trying to be hard on you for caring, I totally respect your concern. The key is to be there for her when and if the need arises.

Please feel free to come back and ask more questions if needed when the time comes. We will be happy to help out.:love

Foobar
02-26-2004, 01:46 PM
I agree that you should educate yourself on the warning signs of PPD. This way, you can help her when or IF the time comes. You might also want to research some natural remedies. Many women here swear by them.


I would also try to not push her too much. Even when you are depressed, too much pressure can make one turn inwards....


Good luck, you are one caring soul

charlottesmom
02-26-2004, 02:52 PM
I am just taking a "wait and see" approach. I am not interested in pushing myself on anyone, about any of my personal views, especially someone who I feel is already in a vulnerable state. Basically, I 've backed off, nothing worse then a meddling in-law, I speak from experience.

I just told her that I was here for her, should she need me. I hope thats enough, and sometimes it is.

Thanks for the input, I will still check out the PPD warning signs.

Alana.