weekly thread may 23-29 [Archive] - MotheringDotCommunity Forums

DalaiMama

05-24-2004, 12:31 AM

well, I just got back from my first night back at work after a luxurious two week vacation. Let me just say this:

I Hate My Job. Hate It. :irked:

The only reason I am still there is because I want to save up more money before the baby comes, and my husband is nagging me about a credit card that I am no longer charging on but still paying off. I do not want to be going to a coffee shop three nights a week to wait hand and foot on some faux hipsters who don't understand the idea of a tip. ahh... I feel better now. :LOL I'll definitely be sticking it out until September, when we're moving. Hopefully here in the next couple of weeks, some of my energy will return so I won't feel so drained.

On another note, I'm ten weeks today... my baby is 25% done (assuming I'm not late). :) I've moved on from regular clothes into my long flowy ELASTIC waist skirts. I just need a few more of em and I'll be set for the rest of the summer. :)

Jessviola

05-24-2004, 10:46 AM

ok i remembered the not so interesting point of my earlier venting. i've noticed i'm avoiding getting dressed and going out of the house because i don't have anything comfortable to wear. i need to find some of those flowy elastic waist skirts but don't have a clue where to look.

i have an appt tomorrow. i'll be exactly 10 weeks according to LMP, although according to FF i O'd on cd18 so it's probably really 9w3d but who really knows...

i've been cleaning up a storm today. i can't believe i actually have a little energy and so i'm trying to get the house in shape to surprise dh when he gets back from his trip tonight. i'm currently on my third load of :laundry and have cleaned up our room (the most neglected of the house of course) enough to see the floor again. or at least the layer of dirt and dust covering it.... i can't wait to vaccuum and get the sheets back on the bed. then i'll feel really good. i am so sick of this mess!!! maybe if i still have the energy i'll dust later! :LOL this must sound so pathetic....

rachel,
sorry about your job :hug i've heard once you start showing people tip better :rolleyes

ok off to switch loads. happy monday everyone!

nikirj

05-24-2004, 11:50 AM

I have come to the conclusion that my life sucks.

In the bad old days of insane asylums, and for a good deal of time after that, violent subjects were often given medication to make them feel nauseous - and it worked. Why? Because nausea is a powerful thing! I can't believe what people expect me to do, it is like they don't understand how bad I feel. You can't see it - it isn't like I turn orange while I'm nauseous - so I guess they just don't understand. Maybe they haven't had a stomach flu for a while, and can't imagine it lasting for MONTHS. BIL keeps asking if I'd like to go out with him and DH, to see a movie or go to dinner or something, and I tell him I want to avoid being out in public as much as possible - he doesn't understand this isn't a weekend thing - it lasts months. My poor kids stay at home with me all day (literally in the house all day) until DH gets home and can take them out.

A typical day:

9:00 Wake up. Try to get out of bed to barf without waking up the kids.
9:05 Try to make the kids & myself breakfast (something simple like cereal and peanut butter toast) before the nausea hits again.
9:30 Finish breakfast. Sit for a while and see if I will barf or not. If not, go online and try to forget how sick I feel. Continue to sit around all morning, snacking liberally on dairy items which for some reason, taste good (but cause incredible amounts of gas and diarrhea, as I am moderately lactose intolerant).
12:00 Try to make kids lunch without throwing up. Macaroni and cheese anyone?
12:30 Throw the plates in the sink and turn around without looking, to avoid throwing up. Go take the kids to lie down and nap.
3:00 Wake up. Throw up. Eat a snack with the kids. Sit on the chair watching the kids beat each other up until 5:00, when DH gets home.
5:00 Sit on the chair and try not to feel to sorry for myself while DH takes the kids out.
7:00 Try not to barf at the smell while DH makes dinner.
9:30 Try not to barf while bathing myself + kids.
10:00 Lie down exhausted, sleep again till 9:00 (and yes, I really am exhausted and yes, I really DO get like 13 hours of sleep every day).

See, life sucks. The other day after I threw up for the sixth time, I was shivering, feeling light-headed and shaking and I was getting really worried. It hasn't gotten that bad again, thank goodness, although I do see black spots quite often (they are little ones, they swim in front of me, it is very odd).

My mom keeps sending me nausea remedies to try :love but so far, nothing works very well (although ginger hard candies can keep me from throwing up long enough to get through a store or drive home). And MIL comes once a week or so and takes the kids for a couple hours - they go do something fun. It doesn't make me feel a whole lot better, but it is nice to know they care.

Jessviola

05-24-2004, 11:58 AM

:hug niki
i hope your sickness goes away soon.

i'm with you on the dairy. for some reason the only foods that sound appetizing to me are largely dairy. and i feel so bad about not wanting to cook or only cooking bland minimally nutritious meals for dd because of my own food aversions. i'm unbelievably grateful to a friend who due to an elimination diet gave me a freezer full of organic meals. i think many days i just wouldn't eat if it weren't for those. unfortunately though they're running out but hopefully i'll be feeling better soon.

i'm starting to crash i think. exhaustion is setting in as well as nausea. oh well, the break was nice while it lasted. i need to keep going though. otherwise i *really* won't have anything to wear to pick up dh tonight and while he probably wouldn't mind, i think airport security would :LOL

nannymom

05-24-2004, 01:05 PM

Niki, I feel your pain. I am so f!@#$%^&*ing sick of how bad I feel all the time and of how froos everything is. :gross

I am exausted I have worked 8 consecutive days in a row and you know what no matter how much you love them other people's children are exausting. :zzz I am so sick of doing their laundry and cleaning up after them and changing dirty diapers with morning sikness is chioce. really it's great i love it. Oh and I also love that everyday my boss microwaves scrambled eggs in a dish that is impossable to get clean then fills it with cold water (why bother to fill it with water at all) :eyesroll and leaves it for me.

I just want to feel better. Ok thanks for leting me vent.

nikirj

05-24-2004, 01:40 PM

:hug Nannymom - I can't imagine having to get a job done on top of this :hug

DD and DS got in a huge fight this morning because they both needed to use the toilet at the same time - end result, DD (who has the world's most hugemongous bladder) pees and poops all over the place (seriously, I think I could have filled a bucket) while DS monopolizes the toilet. I just threw away DD's underwear.

kazmir

05-24-2004, 01:49 PM

I was out, off line, out of commision for 5 days last week with a headache. I didn't even have the energy to log on and ask for help. I finally went to my GP and got some meds that are safe and the headache is gone and I only took them for a couple days. It feels so good to not have a trobbing headache I don't mind the nausea! I have an appt tomorrow with my OB to have an US to make sure the baby is still with me, I can't wait until after this frist trimester and I get to feel the baby more. All those misscarriages have me parinoid. Hope everyone is feeling good and not so tired. Getting closer to week 12 is helping me mentally!

Take care all

Robin

Jenelle

05-24-2004, 03:13 PM

Sorry to hear most of us are still doing crummy. Hugs to all.

I am so looking forward to an energy boost. I am so sick of doing nothing.

I have only actually thrown up 3 times so far, but I feel like I could, most of the time.

I feel so bad about the amount of money we have spent eating from restaurants. I also feel bad about how my son's days go by. Watching kids shows and eating whatever is quick. We never go outside unless my husband is home - and then I don't join them.

I just keep reminding myself that this fog will lift - hopefully in just a few more weeks.

Jessviola

05-24-2004, 03:27 PM

:grouphug for everyone who needs it. i was hoping that some of you who are a little farther along were starting to feel better but i guess it's still too early.

nannymom,
microwaved scrambled eggs? how the heck does that work? it doesn't sound pretty....

niki,
ewww! i hope the mess didn't make you too sick...

robin,
i'm glad you're getting some relief from your headache! i hope your appt goes well tomorrow. i have one too, it'll be very reassuring to hear everything's ok.

jenelle,
we haven't been out of the house much lately either. luckily the weather's been pretty yucky so i've had an excuse, but i still feel really bad about it. i just can't keep up with her out there and there's nowhere to sit when i get tired (it's very damp/puddly lately)

laurata

05-24-2004, 05:21 PM

Jess, if it makes you feel any better, I am feeling MUCH better, and haven't been throwing up this past week or two. The nausea is much improved as well.

I've finally started telling people that live around here. I feel a little sad about not keeping it a secret anymore, but I've enjoyed savoring the pregnancy "just for myself" up till now. In a few weeks I'll be in my second trimester!! I'll be announcing the babe to my family then, I guess. I'm sure everyone will be happy, but they also think they have a say in my pregnancy and birth choices. I feel like I cease to be Laura when I'm pregnant, I'm the Carrier of their New Grandchild.

taradt

05-24-2004, 09:35 PM

((hugs)) to everyone still feeling like crap.

i started getting morning sickness last week sigh.. i was so sure it would stay away this time but alas no.

food aversions are a biggy, i can't meal plan like i usually do because i have no idea what i will be able to stomach day to day. it even changes moment to moment. i had a dinner all picked out but DH took too long getting to making it that by the time he was going to i knew i wouldn't be able to eat.

this past week i found out both my dad's wife and my youngest sister are pregnant, both due in january.

i think i have used up all the energy i had, now i am off to lay down quietly somewhere and hope i get brought ice cream :)

tara

*~*SewHappyNow*~*

05-24-2004, 09:45 PM

I think my m/s is pretty much over... the nausea is getting less, but now I am getting headaches ugh! Also, the last couple days everything is aching.. my feet, my back, my knees.. ow! I have more energy, but my body hurts bleh! Must be all this weight I am gaining.

Good news is I think every once in a while I am feeling the baby move! Just a little bump here and there.. could be gas bubbles.. :baby but I think its probably early quickening :carrot

MountainLovinMama

05-24-2004, 10:05 PM

I am also starting to feel better! :nod :hugs to those of you still in the throes of m/s. I still get it from time to time, and go through waves of feeling like I could puke over anything - or I'll pull out ingredients to make what I thought would be a good well-balanced meal and start to dry-heave and just eat crackers or cereal, again. But it is not as constant, and I am starting to truly cook again. :) And feel more energized, and even sexy (well, every now and then :eyesroll)

Niki - Your talk about kids fighting over the potty made me laugh - last night, I went to empty dd's potty before I went to bed. She had used it right before bed herself, and I didn't want to empty it then and disturb her as she climbed into bed (we keep a potty in her bedroom for easy access!). So, anyway, it was late, it was dark, I had her potty in my hand and whirled into the bathroom to empty it, to find, much to my surprise, dh sitting on the toilet! (also in the dark) It was a very narrow miss!!

So, I am wearing the same d#$mn things every single day. Looking forward to really "showing" rather than hiding my thickening middle - - and backside.

And, yes, I am feeling the baby every now and then too!!! :love It is a subtle shifting inside me - and it makes it all feel more and more real! We still have not told everyone - holding out, I guess. I want to tell dd first (I have told family and friends, just not coworkers, etc) and we still want to wait a bit to tell dd just to be sure all is well. And to let my belly grow a bit more so it may be more "real" to her.

ladymadelon

05-24-2004, 10:30 PM

I'm about ready to just give up.

I'm no more sicker this time than before, but I've never been so tired. I work (I do a paper route from 1 am to 5 am EVERY DAY), so I go to bed about 8 pm and get up at 12:30...do the route...home about 5:30 and sleep til 8:00. It isn't enough.

I have no energy. My house has gone from cluttered to dirty to filthy. And while I do *care*, I just can't do anything about it. DH is trying, he keeps up the kitchen. But laundry...thank goodness my kids have so much clothing.

The biggest problem here is that dh has been laid off since Feb and after we pay the rent next week (takes my entire paycheck), we will be trying to pay all our other bills with his $200/week unemployment. We own 2 months phone, plus car insurance, life insurance, electric. Plus that $200 has to cover our food and gas (at $2.25 a gallon...it costs $50 to fill the van I use for the route and I go through a tank every 5 days). Our car gets much better gas mileage, but it needs work that we can't afford and so I can't use it for the route.

We've been struggling financially for almost 4 years and I'm just gotten so tired of making do and putting off. We have been blessed many ways and many times by the Lord, and we are praying that soon He will bless my husband with a good job. I don't think I'll be able to do the route much past the end of September...plus I'm tired of being tired.

The job thing is complicated for my dh...he is a brain stem injury survivor...it affects alot of things in his brain...but he is the most loving, sweet man and I love him. He just can't do alot of things...multi-tasking, remembering long lists of things to do, he learns new things very slowly and needs lots of reminders. A super repetative job like working on an assembly line would be perfect for him, but those types of jobs don't exist around here. All of our family is here, it would be very difficult to leave, but I'm beginning to wonder...

Anyway, thanks for reading all this, and if you pray, please pray for us.

nannymom

05-25-2004, 10:33 AM

Hi everyone. I am so exausted and feel so pukey, but hey what's new and why complain.lol.
big :grouphug to everyone who feels miserable. I am in week 11 and hoping to feel better soon. The thing is that it actually is better from the first few weeks it's just still so bad :eyesroll

Anyway, I have noticed that sometimes if i straighten up to quickly or stand up with the baby i take care of too fast i am getting a painful crampy feeling. It only lasts a second but I was wondering if you guys thought it was normal.

Also, for those of you with kid/s already, I was wondering when most of you felt the baby move with your first pregnacy

Rebecka-hang in there. I am sure every thing will work out for you and your family. I will be thinking of you. :hug

Kerlowyn

05-25-2004, 11:10 AM

Just got through reading all the posts...hugs :hug to all of you who are still feeling so sick :sick

I am beginning to feel better. Instead of having m/s every day, it has spaced itself out to every few days. Also, the extreme exhaustion I was getting in the afternoon does not happen every day, maybe every other day now.
I am wearing mostly maternity clothes now, I am so huge!! I did go shopping a week ago and got some short, knee length elastic banded denim and khaki skirts (I hate shorts and capris :nono on me ) and a few shirts.

Tomorrow is my first appointment with the midwife. I hope she can assure me that there in only one baby in there...did I mention how HUGE I am :LOL After my appointment, after I get to hear a heartbeat, we will tell everyone we are having another baby. I had a m/c this past November and feel like I need the assurance before I am comfortable telling. We are going to spend the weekend with my in-laws, and will let them know then. :love

I have been feeling what I believe is movement also, the bubbles popping feeling, and the very gentle thuds. But it is so early!
I did not feel anything with my first baby until 22 weeks, and 19 weeks with my second. :scratch

DalaiMama

05-25-2004, 12:07 PM

hello everyone! sorry so many of us are still feeling crappy. only a few more weeks of that, hopefully. :) I've gone from constant nausea to sporadic nausea, so things are improving on my end... slooowly. Good news, though... my boss is cutting my hours at work. :eyesroll I'll be down to two days instead of three, which is fine with me. I wasn't quitting because I've been there forever and my boss has a hard time finding reliable help, but his daughter got fired from her job and "needs the hours." It's a blessing in disguise. :)

Emily~ I think I felt movement with my first at around 14 weeks. I can't wait to feel it this time, hopefully soon. I think that since I know what it feels like, I'll notice earlier this time? of course I've just cursed myself. :LOL I also have noticed the crampy feeling you mentioned... I figure it's just ligaments and muscles that are already stretched complaining when we move the wrong way too quickly.

Rebecka ~ Your family is in my thoughts. I'm sorry to hear that you guys are having such a hard time. I wish I had some suggestions for you, but all I have is :hug. I'm sending good job vibes your way. :)

*~*SewHappyNow*~*

05-25-2004, 12:50 PM

Anyway, I have noticed that sometimes if i straighten up to quickly or stand up with the baby i take care of too fast i am getting a painful crampy feeling. It only lasts a second but I was wondering if you guys thought it was normal.

yep I get this sometimes, esp when picking up dd. I believe its probably the circular tendon stretching, quite normal

Eruditia

05-26-2004, 04:32 AM

Ladymadelon, DON'T give up!! I know things must feel pretty impossible right now, but you really can pull through the difficult financial times.

For a couple of years I have been participating on a forum for simple living (www.simpleliving.net). Through that I have come across the most amazing stories of people who have been able to turn their lives around financially--not through any gimmics or get-rich-quick schemes, but by learning how to live frugally within their means. I highly recommend it--it is an incredibly diverse bunch of people, and they have amazing suggestions, opinions, and stories to share.

Aside from that, there are a couple of books available at most any public library that are great for getting started on making ends meet. The two that I recommend the most are totally non-judgmental. There's no artificial budget to set up, just a (long) process of improving your relationship with money:

Dominguez. Your Money or Your Life (this is the simple living Bible--it's pretty extreme in that it tries to get you to revolutionize your relationship to money, and it demands a lot of self-reflection and self-criticism on the part of the reader. It might be a tough first step for a newbie, but the more you get into frugality the better it gets. The best thing about it is it encourages you to face your fears about money and gives tons of suggestions for educating yourself on how to be financially fit)

Amy D. The Tightwadder Gazette (can never spell that woman's last name--this is a collection of newsletters she put out in the late 80s. It's a PHENOMENAL collections of suggestions for how to pinch pennies while raising a large family, plus it's filled with her sometimes humorous sometimes deeply philosophical reflections on money, family, society as a whole, and consumerism in particular--very inspirational!)

Smart Women Finish Rich (not as profound as the previous two, but an easy introduction about thinking about money in a smart way--whereas the other two are all about living according to your own personal values and following your calling in life with money merely as the tool to make it possible, this one leans a little more toward the idea that being rich is good, period, which I don't like. But it IS a useful little book).

I think the most important (and hardest!) thing of all is to face whatever financial reality you're facing head-on, then educate, educate, educate yourself about how to deal with the problem. Breaking the whole horrible "ack, we're drowning!!!" dilemma into smaller components that you can identify and deal with will help too. Like if you're getting behind in utilities bills, I know it's possible to come up with an agreement with each service provider to keep paying a smaller amount per month. As long as they know you're making a good faith effort, they won't cut you off. If debt is a problem too, there are really practical, basic steps you can start taking to deal with that too. And as for the car problem--maybe your husband would be able to barter his skills during the time he is out of work in exchange for services from someone who knows cars--maybe trading work would help him get through the rough patch of unemployment too--it always helps to be doing SOMETHING!

Sorry to go on at such length :shy -- your post just really called out to me, and I am convinced that you and your family can pull through, since I've heard the stories of so many others who have. Best wishes to you!

lauren

05-26-2004, 09:25 AM

12 weeks

Still feeling pretty lousy here. Not throwing up but extremely tired and not interested in food, then ravenously hungry for.....what??? I'm sleeping about 10 hours a night and waking up feeling tired.

My job is very demanding and my ds and dd need lots of attention (as they should!!) But it is all too much. Trying to clean the house today, but here I am sitting at the computer!!

Jessviola

05-26-2004, 09:49 AM

monday night i went to pick up dh at the airport and we decided to stop to eat on the way home. when we pulled in to the parking lot, we noticed a horrible smell, like burning rubber, and then smoke from under our hood. the two of us, knowing nothing about cars, kind of stood there staring under the hood hoping an answer would magically come to us :LOL and the whole time i was trying to breathe through my shirt because i was scared of the fumes being dangerous for my baby. we finally tried starting it up again when it had cooled down a bit and it made a horrible noise so we called AAA. and had to get my dad to come with my mom's car (it has the spare carseat) so we could get dd home. by the time the tow truck got there it was 1:30am and by the time we got home it was 2:30. luckily dd slept through the whole thing though. and i got the most delicious cheesy gordita crunch while i was waiting, i'm talking commercial quality here :LOL

so it turns out that the car is still driveable and all (yay!) but the air conditioner is completely shot (hadn't been working lately anyways, but now will have to be completely replaced) and if we want to replace it, it'll cost something like $1600!!! so just in time for a nice, hot, preggo summer, i'll be cruisin' with no a/c and dd hates having windows open. aaaaahhh!!! but there's no way we can afford a repair like that right now. now i'm a little thankful for the cold.....

so then yesterday i was left without a car but my appt to get to. i tried to reschedule, but they didn't have anything until june 14!!! that's practically time for my next appt! i've been really nervous about this pregnancy and really wanted to go make sure everything was ok, so i spent all morning trying to figure out a way to get there. finally i found a car to borrow so i was able to make it. the appt went great. she tried to listen to the heartbeat, but couldn't find it, which normally would have worried me, but knowing it was still early and not uncommon i was surprisingly calm about it. although i did feel tears come to my eyes...so she did a quick u/s and found the heartbeat immediately. it was just absolutely amazing. i can't even describe how miraculous and wonderful it was to see that little flutter. it has put me so much at ease and i feel so much more relaxed now.

when i got back i was playing with dd and noticed she had to use the potty, so we went into the bathroom and then she started resisting. i saw that dh had finished off the tp (and not replaced it :eyesroll it drives me insane how much tp he thinks is necessary, i mean it *seriously* upsets me :splat) and went to go find another. in the meantime, dd went back into the bedroom and peed all over some of her favorite books :bawl i was so upset when i found out. my patience is so much thinner than it used to be and that made me feel even worse. i was trying to get her to understand that the books were now ruined. i guess that's the part that really bothered me. they were her favorites and we used to read them everynight. i suck at letting go of stuff too, so i'm still desperately seeking ways to salvage them since i think i was able to wipe them dry pretty quickly and the ones with paper pages only got hit on the cover. i feel like such a mean mama lately and when you put that together with the no energy factor it just gets worse. please somebody tell me that this will pass soon and i'll be back to my patient happy self soon..... :crying :guilty

laura, karen and kristi,
i'm glad you're all starting to feel better!!! that's awesome news and hope to join you all soon!

tara,
congrats to your pregnant family members! it'll be great to have so many babies born at the same time! sorry you're feeling sicker now though, i hope it doesn't last long.

kristi,
i'm glad i'm not the only one with a one outfit wardrobe! misery loves company i guess.....

rebecca,
i will keep your family in my thoughts and prayers.

nannymom,
i've noticed that any quick movements can cause pains. i think it might have something to do with the muscles relaxing. i have to take care to be gentle with my movements so i don't pull something. i wasn't sure i was feeling movement until a little after my 20th week last time.

kazmir

05-26-2004, 11:56 AM

Hi everyone, I went to my appt yesterday with my hubbie and it went very well. The US Tech found the heartbeat and measured the baby and its growing at the perfect rate. She even made us a tape and gave us pictures to share. The baby even wiggled alittle for us! I feel so much better about this pregnancy now! Then we spoke to my OB and we'll do another US in a couple of weeks to check for Down Syndrome and do a blood test. We decided to do this after much thought about our family situation and my age (almost 40!). I am a little nervous still.

I told my co-workers and a friend yesterday. It seems to make it more real for me now. I am pretty tired today and just wanted to stay in bed. At least work is not stressful and I sit at a computer most of the time. I can't wait until this trimester is up!

Jessica - what an ordeal! You must be exhausted. I know dealing with a DD can be exasperating! Mine refuses to wear "ugly" clothes right now. Which according to her is most of the clothes she was wearing up to now! Today she went to daycare in her ballerina outfit, At least its not cold here!

Lauren - Hang in there! Hopefully the tiredness will go away soon. That's what I'm hoping at least.

To the rest - We are all getting closer to the easing/ending of the m/s! Something to look forward too.

Robin

EnviroBecca

05-26-2004, 07:12 PM

My nausea seems to be following a weekly schedule. :scratch Every morning is touchy--if I don't wake up to eat a few pretzels in the early morning hours, I can expect difficulty keeping my breakfast down, and I often feel yucky until noon--but the really nasty persistent nausea starts Sunday night, peaks Monday morning and is bad all day (this is also when I'm most tired; I slept almost twice as many hours as I was awake the past 2 Mondays), and subsides Tuesday afternoon. Only in the first week of nausea did I throw up anytime between Wed. noon and Sun. noon. :confused: It's not because my schedule is different on the weekends--my bosses are letting me work flexible hours :love and I've decided church is optional, so I'm not pushing myself to get up early on any day. It's good to have a somewhat predictable pattern, anyway!

We went to yard sales on Sat. and got some baby clothes and toys. Friends gave us their outgrown infant car seat, a model which has NOT been recalled!

Health Valley Lentil Couscous Instant Soup is my new favorite food for the office!! Yummy, all-natural, vegan, and if you eat the whole thing (2 "servings") it has FOURTEEN grams of protein, 40% of your daily fiber, and 20% of the non-pregnant Daily Value of iron and Vitamin A. It was on sale for 85c at my co-op a couple of weeks ago; if only I'd known it was so delicious, I'd have bought a bunch of them! (NOTE: It's moderately spicy. I can eat spicy foods again now, but I bet some of you are having trouble w/them.)

Since my nausea started exactly 4 weeks after conception, I'm hoping it will end at exactly 12 weeks...which means it's halfway over! :thumb Thanks and sympathy :hug to those who remind me that it could be a lot worse!

MountainLovinMama

05-27-2004, 08:49 AM

Ladymelon - sorry to hear about your stressful work and financial situation. :hug I hope you and your dh find some answers to help ease your load.

Eruditia - thanks for the recommendations on reading about bugeting and simplifying. OUr situation is by choice and not as dire, but we have decided that I will be a SAHM with this second child (I was so fortunate to be able to bring dd to work with me when she was an infant/young toddler, and have been working part-time in a *wonderful* small indepenedent school for a number of years...). Anyway, although dh has negotiated a raise that will ease the loss of my salary, it will be a shift to be a SAHM, we really want/need to simplify a bit. I am going to look for those books!

Jess - I'm glad your car issues began AFTER you picked up your dh. I'm mean, I'm all for us educated, liberated women being able to fix our own cars if we want to...but...!

I really and truly am feeling better - m/s is even less frequent and less intense when it does hit. Hope you all get to enjoy this change soon, too! I am more relaxed, feeling better physically, and mentally knowing that I am on my way out of that 12-week window of uncertainties. I am thinking I will tell everyone at work next week ("everyone at work" is basically an entire school community - it will really be letting the cat out of the bag. I think I'm ready!)

KoalaMommy

05-27-2004, 09:23 AM

I have felt really guilty to post before now because everyone is so miserable. I'm really sorry! I haven't even had the slightest bit of m/s since 8 weeks. And now the fatigue is going away and my hunger is calming down. That's good because I got a weight gain lecture at my visit with the mw last week! I have, however, had the most annoying sore throat for the last week. I think it's just allergies (grass is a big one for me), but it won't go away and it's driving me nuts. I also keep having this tingly feeling in my back around my left shoulder blade. Does anyone know what that could be? My sciatica is pretty much gone since my dr. showed me a great stretch to help it. Maybe my baby just like to sit on my nerves!!

I am so jealous of those of you who can be SAHMs and WAHMs! Dh and I keep talking about it because they don't treat me very well at my job, I have lots of experience and took a step back in my career (and a HUGE pay cut) to move and support DH through grad school, but they act as though I'm inexperienced or something. I would love nothing more than to not return after the baby comes, but then we wouldn't have health insurance (or an income of any kind) and I don't think we'd qualify for medicaid because 1) I could COBRA (though that alone would be insanely expensive) and 2) we own our house and I think it's probably worth too much. So I think I'll be stuck working for another year and a half or so after the baby comes. I keep trying to come up with other options, but the health insurance is the big stumbling block. Dh is sweet, and he's working on ideas too but I just don't see it happening. I wouldn't care so much if they weren't so icky at work.

I am looking forward to a 3-day weekend though :banana !

nannymom

05-27-2004, 11:25 AM

Hi Ladies. I hope everyone is feeling good.

DH and I are going for our birth center consultation this afternoon. I am trying not to get my hopes up but I am excited. I am hoping to hear the heart beat, but I'm not sure if they'll do it at a first meeting. I am dying to hear it. I have heard great things about it. It is essentially just like a homebirth you even get to leave 4 hours after the baby is born! I am hoping it will be an insuarnce covered alternative, but we aren't ruling out home birth yet.

Last night my mom and I met at the mall and she bought me tons of maternity clothes. It was so nice of her and now I won't have to feel frumpy and like i look like crap.

well, nothing else here except that I am living for the three day weekend even though my MIL is coming to town....

MountainLovinMama

05-27-2004, 11:28 AM

Hilary -hang in there! When my dd was born, me leaving work was not at all an option. I was SO lucky to be able to actually bring dd to work with me - but then worked during the day at work (with baby, so I was mama too), did most of the housework and cooking, etc at home and did the bulk of the parenting (my dh is a wonerful dad and hubby, don't get me wrong - but his job is CONSUMING, time and energy-wise). It was exhausting - but I wouldn't trade it for the world! Now, three years later come fall, things have changed with dh's job and I have the option to leave work. I don't think we imagined that that at the time of dd's birth. Maybe with time your time will come!

Jenelle

05-27-2004, 04:21 PM

Hello ladies. What will we all talk about when we actually feel good? :)

In fact, yesterday I felt really good. I managed to thoroughly clean the toilet, pick up and vacuum the living room, pick up the kitchen a little bit, and actually bathe my son and myself. It's sad that that's a really good day for me now! I used to be able to do so much more. But I keep reminding myself that this will pass soon and all be worth it. Today I am back to not feeling so great.

I have definitely noticed a connection between eating more protein and feeling good. I was having a hard time getting enough protein because for a long time I had cut out dairy for bowel reasons. Well, I cannot tell you how much better I felt when I finally gave in and just had a big old glass of (organic) chocolate milk! Now when I start to get that "nasty feeling" - you all know what I'm talking about! - I go have a glass of milk and it goes away. I had been taking a calcium supplement, but it's just not the same. I feel like right now I just NEED the dairy. Weird.

One week from today I get to have my first ultrasound. Can't wait to hear the heartbeat and see that all is well.

taradt

05-27-2004, 08:59 PM

Eruditia - even though we are doing pretty good at the moment i plan on checking out those books.

Jess - just reading about your day is making me tired ;-p i don't know how you were able to stay awake that late (so what time did dd wake up the next morning?)
hope you figure out the car thing soon.
i know what you mean about no patience, i feel bad about that as well and was talking to another very mainstream pregnant person who was saying whats the big deal, then i realized if you normally ignore your child, keep them in front of the tv ect then of course there is no difference. it is those of us who really are trying to do the best for our children that are noticing the inability to keep up at the same level as before. :soapbox

robin - yeah on finding the heartbeat :)

nannymom - how did your consult go?

tara

Oregonicmama

05-28-2004, 01:14 AM

Hey mamas,

Sorry to hear most of you are still feeling icky. I haven't puked in about a week, but I still don't want to eat anything normal. I had my favorite cook book mailed to me, and I had to force myself to choose a recipe for dinner. I am getting better about cooking, but nothing really appeals to me. I eat because i have to or I'll puke. I just thank god I am not craving sweets all the time. this is usually a problem for me.
I am sooooo exhausted though. Once I get up to pee at night, I lay awake for hours (like 3!) I've watched it become light out almost every night this week. And its been so stinkin hot here I cannot get cmfortable. Too hot for a comforter or even a knit blanket, but too cold for a sheet. It drives me nuts. And then my legs start cramping up... on on on until DD wakes me up at 9. I was putting movie in for her and going back to sleep for an hour ( this makes me feel like a big slacker... I mean I can't even drag my a$$ out of bed at 9 am!?!), but she broke the vcr/tv (2 in 1) the other day, so now I can't do that. She has been really cooperative about playing by herself with her toys for a while in the morning, but she comes in my room every 20 minutes, sooooo annoying! I hate to buy a tv/vcr (I just feel quilty spending money on something I don't really like to support anyway), but I can't deal. She never naps, so now I get no break all day long at all. I have been teaching her to pick up after herself though, and she almost LIKES it. COOL!
I finally cleaned my kitchen after over a week the other day, and my room (after a heck of a lot longer than that!), and the living room is half way there, but I just get mad whenever I go in DDs room. I haven't even pulled up her blinds in weeks. At least she doesn't hang out in there a lot. My toilet has some kind of mold growing in it, even though I cleaned it last week. I 'm not touching it yet out of principal, maybe I'll turn it into a science experiment (or maye I'll just go buy a bleach drop in for it).
I have my first prenatal with Midwife on Tuesday. I am so excited. She's coming to my house even. I am so glad b/c she live an hour away and my van gets 8 miles to the gallon! I hope she doesnt want me to come to her house anytime soon.
I started feeling baby #1 moving around sometime in the 3rd month. Around 4 months I had a really cool experience with her. I was laying on my friends couch about to go to sleep, and I put my hands on my belly. She moved up to the "surface" just then and I could feel her knees and back and butt and head. I started crying it was so beautiful! I felt so extra bonded to her after that. I was super skinny though, so don't expect that.
Oh boy I hear you all about little kiddy's driving you crazy. DD refuses to ride it the cart at the store, it drives me crazy!!!! I don't even want to bring her with me, but its the only time we get out of the house (our yard has NO shade and I can't take it). I am trying to be calm with her, and embrace the "children as spiritual leaders" artical in the new issue of Mothering. I like the mantra that goes something like "Ignore the negative, reward the positive" I at least don't feel so bad for just ignoring her behavior sometimes.
Oh and to the mama who had the 2 kid potty incident, you handled that well. I would have totally gone balisitc!!! It would have pushed me right over the edge, like had to leave the room style. You are a strong mama!

OK off to eat some Raisin Bran Crunch ( I can't believe I'm eating such crap!) before I pass out.

Hugs to you all!

lauren

05-28-2004, 05:33 AM

Jenelle I'm with you on the dairy thing--for some reason it calms by stomach right down when it is feeling icky. Last night right before bed I had a big old bowl of ice cream and glass of milk. Ahhhhh. Perfect. I'm not usually a big dairy person at all, but it is hitting the spot!

rainy32

05-28-2004, 10:27 AM

Hi everyone,

I logged on here and said hello on the "list of dates" but have been hanging out mainly on the la mama's list for lack of time and energy to write on two! so I'll say hi and introduce myself -- i'm renee, 31, 12 weeks pregnant tomorrow, first baby, live in so. california but miss the country, am a south dakota girl and my dh is from w. virginia.

The first 9 weeks i was sea sick constantly, CONSTANTLY and had to nibble on crackers and ginger snaps all the time, but no puking. For the last 3 weeks I dry heave all the time and puke violently at the oddest things. i'd love to go into detail about the rat exterminator at our house last weekend ... but i know most of you are sick, too! wouldn't want to start a chain reaction.

whats really frustrating me, though is that once i find a food that works, and i eat it for a few days, i am suddenly violently averse to it. It was scrambled eggs last week -- 3 days in a row. Yogurt the week before. Now even typing those words makes me sick. I'm fast running out of food options. AND I love to cook but have been absolutely unable to.

Do you also notice that the dirtier the kitchen gets, the better it is just to avoid it??? The thought of doing dishes makes me want to cry. Also, the thought of any dairy or pasta at all makes me cry -- and to think that in Week 7 I lived on scalloped potatoes and macaroni/cheese.

on a happier note -- heard the heartbeat two days ago -- i taped it for dh who just got a new job and can't be taking time off. to me, the baby sounds like a little yellow stallion pony galloping on the beach. i love it so much!!! :love we have played the tape for all of our parents, who are so excited. we told everyone REALLY early because neither of us can keep a secret, and i knew within 13 days of concepption -- so everyone knew by 6 weeks.

I just want to say, before I go, to Rebecka -- you're in my prayers. my brother had a head injury and I watched the struggle that he went through -- so i really relate to your husband's need for a calm and repetitive job -- i hope that you are both able to find the financial support you need and deserve. and I myself am going to go to the library and get Your Money or Your Life - so many people have recommended it, its about time I read it!

peace, renee

sadean

05-28-2004, 12:39 PM

My week has been o.k. I have been out of my office traveling around visiting offices we fund through work (I work for a large non-profit funder) with a woman from our home office. She doesn't drive very smoothly, so I did have one bout of "car sickness" and she had to pull off the freeway for me to puke...really classy :LOL Today was my first day back to the office this week, and we closed up early for the holiday week-end...sometimes I :love my boss. So, I have a 3.5 day week end ahead of me :D Going to plant stuff and clean my house...really exciting I know.

I am still trying to track down my previous midwife, but haven't been able to get a hold of her. Considering my options...

MountainLovinMama

05-29-2004, 10:59 AM

Was that me who was assuring you all that I was feeling better, more energized, etc, etc???? :ignore :shake The past few days I have been exhausted again - and short on patience. No fun. Getting outside, getting some exercise and trying to be productive seem to help, but...

Hope to bounce back again soon. I had a taste of what the second trimester is supposed to bring - I want some more!!

nikirj

05-29-2004, 01:51 PM

Hi everyone!

Sorry to hear everyone else is sick, too. I totally know what you all mean about the kids - before I started getting sick, in a typical day we would drop of DH at work, go to the park, go to the zoo, go to the store, go home to nap, play at home for a bit, and then go pick up DH and either go out or spend the evening quietly at home. But now, we wake up, eat cereal, and I sit in the chair and watch the kids try to occupy themselves or watch TV :-(. I feel so bad for them. But I know that this would be normal for some families :-(.

I'm having a major beef aversion. Anything beef-related is just disgusting. And DH had to have BIL over for teri steaks (bbq) last night - I didn't know how mad to get about that so I just sat and felt sick but luckily he was considerate enough to try to prevent any smoke from getting back into the house.

I hear you about the dairy, too - problem is, I'm lactose intolerant. I can handle some amount of cheese but a glass of milk would be unpleasant afterwards. I can't stay away from it, though, since it is a big help in settling my stomach, so I eat/drink anyway, but I've had gas and diarrhea on and off for weeks now, which sucks.

Changed

05-29-2004, 07:47 PM

Alrighty, sorry I haven't checked in this thread yet. I'm still getting over the MS. No more puking but everything makes me queezy and nothing I love sounds good anymore. Something is wrong and gross about everything I try to eat. Iced tea and salad are keeping me alive and awake. Salad has almost no odor so it isn't bothering me yet... I need alot of sleep nowdays, weird cause I'm a big night owl normally. I am so ready for this to get moving! It feels like nothing is happening. I look obviously pregnant but that's it! I have all my maternity clothes so that's over with and I'm comfy but I'm woried about everything. Except m/c, isn;t that weird. I have a child with a genetic disorder but I'm worried about things like getting a double stroller and where i'll find a LLL meeting when this baby comes. WHat the hell is wrong with me? My mother has taken my 4 y/o this weekend which sounds nice in theory but makes me nuts because I just know she's allowing things I wouldln't and I miss her so much I just can't enjoy the break. Oh( btw, we had all the genetic testing done before we got pg again and all clear. It was just a fluke thing so we are at no greater risk than normal. Normal is 1/500 risk of any type of chromosomal defect.) That's alot less stress but we are still going to have some genetic testing done just in case. I'm having my tripple screen early at 14 weeks and a level 2 U/S at 16-18 weeks. If all is good on those I'm not having another amnio. It hurt so dang bad the first time and knowing wouldn't change anything for me anyway. I just know from last time that it's a HUGE help to be prepared.

Just want to throw it out there just in case, if anyone is having problems (worried of problems with the baby) or does down the road that are similar please feel free to pm me. I've done this all and know how hard it is to go through alone with so many questions. BUT I hope we all have healthy happy babies!!

Anyway, I hope everyone gets to feeling better soon.

Question for everyone: I keep having this weird feeling and i'm almost sure it's the baby moving. Is this even possible so early? I'd think i'd know gas by now kwim?