The G.O.O.D. club (August thread)

[Piglet68]

The old thread was getting pretty loooong, so welcome to the newest thread for the Get Out Of Debt Club! :w

bamboogrrl: I thought about what you said. If I understand you correctly, you are suggesting that maybe those from higher income backgrounds actually find it easier to get into the "frugal" mindset, because it isn't something they've sort of been saddled with forever...is that right? Like, it's almost a "novelty", as opposed to someone who has "gone without" all their lives, and/or who has little hope of making much more money than they do now...? Interesting points...


i've found in the past the more I make, the more I want. must rework this idea...I really do want to feel at a gut level that I don't "need" something better. I guess it is about embracing what you have (family, happiness, etc.) the nonmonetary things. I appreciate those, but man oh man it is so tough to loose everything you were raised on, you know?

I can Soooo relate to this. I have spent my life, it seems, looking ahead to "brighter days" financially. I've had to really work hard on getting myself to "stop and smell the flowers", appreciate what I have today, and stop thinking that a nicer car, owning a home, etc...are going to make life really all that much different/better.

Peppermint, I must confess it's posts like yours that reinforce my desire to never again live in a house, lol. I just love our small spaces - less to clean, less to fix up, less maintainance...but I do admire you for prioritizing and focussing on the things you can do now, inexpensively.

As for your friend, when I get into that situation I just tell myself things like this: my kids would destroy nice furniture right now so it's a good thing we don't have any. I could care less what gets spilled or scratched or busted...that sort of peace-of-mind is worth something!

You mentioned something about not being a two-income family. That's us. Between DH and I we have lots of earning potential, but we are making choices about family: being home with the kids (at least one of us), moving to a place where we truly want to raise them (even if that means giving up some career options), etc....I don't regret them for one bit, but it is frustrating sometimes to feel that you aren't reaching your "potential" financially.

kathsmom: congrats on saving that money!! that's fabulous! :banana

Rowantree: could you not trade in your car for something smaller or more economical? I would think a car payment would be one thing you *could* do something about...

Well, I'll finish off this lengthy post with my own peice of celebratory news: I got paid today (I get paid once a month) and we have officially made it through a whole budget month without going into the red (we were ahead by $8.87, lol). This is the first time in months that we have done so, and we are very proud of ourselves! :balloons

[kerc]

yay piglet!!! the real celebration is to actually save that spare money to have a rainy day fund right? or are we having a potluck supper?


good point about the furniture being destroyed. storing that one away for future use. i will need reminding.

[Piglet68]

the real celebration is to actually save that spare money to have a rainy day fund right? or are we having a potluck supper?

Oh yeah, our $8.87 is going to get us far! :laugh:

....but I do appreciate the advice (and thanks for the congrats!). We have only one month left on this budget, then everything changes again. We move, and DH begins a new job (and we have no idea what that is or how much it will make right now, lol). But still, we stuck to our budget, paid all our bills on time...so yay for us. :)

[Galatea]

you are suggesting that maybe those from higher income backgrounds actually find it easier to get into the "frugal" mindset, because it isn't something they've sort of been saddled with forever...is that right? Like, it's almost a "novelty", as opposed to someone who has "gone without" all their lives, and/or who has little hope of making much more money than they do now...? Interesting points...

I agree with this. My parents are fairly well-to-do, though they live entirely on revolving credit. All my life I have had anything that I wanted as soon as I wanted it (esp. from my mom). Instead of becoming demanding and spoiled, it had the opposite effect: I never wanted to ask for anything, and I learned that getting your every material whim instantly didn't necessarily make you happy. Dh, on the other hand, grew up poor (though his parents do well now), and whenever he wanted something he was told they couldn't afford it and so he never got instant gratification.

FF to the present: Dh calls me from Wal-Mart (that's another battle) and says he has to have the complete first season of Spongebob on dvd for $40. He asks me if it is okay (I keep the budget) and then lists all the reasons he needs it. I say, "Well, why not wait 3 days and see if you still want it then?" (I was trying to be nice, but the true answer was "hell no!" since I quit my larger-income job to be sahm for awhile and we are B-R-O-K-E.) He says, "I knew you'd say that," and gets a little pouty. Turns out he didn't get it, but he is buying it tonight after work.

Dh has never had the freedom to buy whatever you want whenever you want and so he does not want to give up the possibility. I have always had it and so do not care so much. It is making our budgeting and my sahm-ing difficult. Dh is a great guy, though, and he wants me to be a sahm, but it is stressing him out.

[srain]

Dh has never had the freedom to buy whatever you want whenever you want and so he does not want to give up the possibility. I have always had it and so do not care so much. It is making our budgeting and my sahm-ing difficult.
Have you considered budgeting a monthly personal allowance for each of you?

[Galatea]

Um, well, we had that when I still worked. Dh always spent it on clothes for himself and I spent it on books. But I just got my last full paycheck and we are going to be bringing in less than we owe out until I figure out how to make some money!

[miss_sonja]

I can Soooo relate to this. I have spent my life, it seems, looking ahead to "brighter days" financially. I've had to really work hard on getting myself to "stop and smell the flowers", appreciate what I have today, and stop thinking that a nicer car, owning a home, etc...are going to make life really all that much different/better.


We've always found that our wants and needs seem to keep right up with our income. But (aside from the addition of the kids, who give us so much joy) we're not really any happier than we were when we were livin' on nothin' and making do.

It's always my goal to budget, to keep to it, to save where I can...hasn't worked yet. Part of the problem is that I am close to having a hoarding problem (it's not technically there yet, in a psych sense, but there's the potential). Lots coming in, little going out:-(.

I'm new to this thread and forum...sounds like a good place to be!

[Peppermint]

Piglet- Yeah! That is a great accomplishment :) (and thanks for starting the new thread.

Off to a wedding today!

[Piglet68]

lilli78, that's a good point.

I, too, have experienced much "richer" times than we have now. I, too, know from experience that dropping hundreds on nice clothes, or dining out in fine restaurants, does not really make one more happy. I know what it's like to have that "instant gratification", and I know that the newness of the new clothes wears off just as fast as the newness of a bargain diaper-pail find at a thrift store! :)

That's a very good point, and presents some interesting psychology around "being frugal"!

[memory maker]

well I would like to join this club. We have been trying to get out of debt since my dd was born. we have a lot of hospital bills that we have been trying to get paid off, and other bills have been put on the side and are adding up. We have had 5 overdrafts on our checking account since January which add up to $3000.00. I am starting to look for a child to watch to make some extra money while staying at home, but am really not looking forward to it. We are having trouble cutting back, but dh is reluctant about cutting out things like dish network.
He needed to buy a new sportscoat for a funeral and paid over $300 for it. Can we afford that? NO But yet he gets mad at me for buying things we need. I have had to stop going on the diapering board because it was too tempting to buy what everyone else had.

[rowantree]

Rowantree: could you not trade in your car for something smaller or more economical? I would think a car payment would be one thing you *could* do something about...


well unless you ladies have any ideas. the situatio is like this. We bought a Tahoe cause DH needed the truck aspects for work (carpenter) and it seats the kids nice for trips and stuff. It cost us 20,000 and we still owe 14,000. we refinanced once to get the payments lower, thank goodness. But its all trashed cause DH uses it for work. We would take a huge loss on it if we tried to get rid of it. its worth more to us as a car, but if anyone has experience ill take advice! I have a VW golf that I love and OWN. we also have a vw bus that DH loves and would totally drive if we could get rid of the Tahoe.

[kerc]

hmmmm. on trashed cars. dunno. My car (honda accord) is nice and we owe something like 3500 on it. Since about 3 weeks ago it has smelled awful. tried leaving windows open, etc. but darn it thing is just stinky. so we finally recalled that we let dd have some milk on a car ride from a bottle and that might be it. I rented a steam cleaner + upholstery attachments yesterday for 33 bucks (including soap) and I spent over an hour shampooing the carpet and seats. WHAT A DIFFERENCE!!! I had to empty the dirty water three times before I was done. I've owned this car for about 2 years and have a big, furry golden retreiver. Some of the dirt on the seats was from the week before erin was born when I walked him and forgot a towel to dry him off.

anyhow, on to the couch and dh's car today. If you do rent a steam cleaner, we went to the small local hardware store cause it isn't open on sunday so we get to keep it an extra day free.

[witch's mom]

Thanks for the new thread, Piglet. After a couple weeks pretty much off MDC (busy with little Dd's birthday, obsessed with Tour de France, then on vacation), I'm back. Unfortunately, my time away from MDC involved a little too much spending, but it definitely wasn't as bad as it could have been.

We rented a beach house for vacation, and the owner cut me a great deal ($150 total for three nights). Plus I paid that about four months ago, so it wasn't money out of pocket right now. We brought all our own food, spent every day on the beach, and only splurged on ice cream cones each afternoon.

However, before we left, we had a birthday gathering for little DD's fifth birthday. A bunch of kids and parents over for a barbecue and art projects. I need to go through the statement and figure out exactly how much we spent, but I'm certain it was more than the $100 I'd budgeted. We rarely entertain, though, so an occasional splurge like this hardly seems too frivolous. (But maybe that's just me making excuses.)

On this subject of frugality in relation to income level, I was raised in an upper-middle-income household and am still in that situation now. I see my parents, now retired, continuing to live well because they were smart and frugal with the money they had. DH and I make decent money, but we spend too much. Our only debt is the house. So my Get Out of Debt goals are maybe a little different than some of yours: I'm trying to establish better spending and saving habits so we can pay off the long-term debt (mortgage) and save for our later years. The challenge here is that we HAVE the money to blow, so blowing it is always an option. I just know it's not a smart thing to do. So most of my battle involves staying motivated and on top of it.

I was the one who spent $980 on groceries (our biggest trouble spot) between June 15 and July 15, so today I'm going to sit down with the statement and see where we are mid-cycle.

[srain]

I'm trying to establish better spending and saving habits so we can pay off the long-term debt (mortgage) and save for our later years. The challenge here is that we HAVE the money to blow, so blowing it is always an option.
Would it help to NOT have the money to blow? If it would, then you might want to consider making larger extra payments on your mortgage every month.

[Nitenites]

Hi! Hope you ladies don't mind if I join in! I've been lurking for a while and getting inspiration from you!
Between student loans, credit card (just one!), car loans, and mortgage, we owe... waaaaay too much! So, I recently read The Complete Cheapskate by Mary Hunt, and we're trying to implement her strategies. I've also gone through the Tightwad Gazette I, II, and III in the past week. SO much good information there!
My biggest challenge is curbing my wants - I see things that others have and I want them. Strangely, since I read Mary Hunt's book, I've been able to tone it down a little. I hope it sticks, and I can "stay on the wagon."
srain, have you thought about having your mortgage automatically deducted from your checking account, and then writing an extra check toward principle every month?

[chalupamom]

We're back from our el-cheapo beach vacation and am ready to face the budget!

Today marks the first day of our son's reduced pre-school schedule which saves us a little over $200 a month. We've also just received confirmation that my student loans have been consolidated (for a longer term we hope not to use as well as a lower interest rate) so we'll save almost $400 a month there as well.

I'm still working on convincing my husband to sell the one car we're paying on. Our other two cars are paid for, although one is kind of dicey. We live in a smallish town, though, and it's not like he'd be hours away from me if something happened - why have a car we're paying on sit around for hours all day in a parking lot? The miles just turned to 56,000, though, so I'm not sure if we can get out from under it or we have to grit our teeth and press on.

As for groceries and household supplies, we have a goal of $50 a week. I can usually come close as long as my husband stays out the grocery store (where he buys only ice cream and chips - makes me insane!). The $50 includes all food, cleaning products, paper goods and pet supplies. It's loss leader city around here!!

[Piglet68]

chalupamom: congrats on the extra savings to your budget! Now....what are you going to do with that extra cash each month? :wink

rowantree: that's an interesting point. if you owe alot more than you think you will get for the car, that could be a problem. though you may be suprised how a little elbow grease will help. i guess the thing is: right now you owe $14000 and will be making payments for X number of years. If you sell it, even taking a loss, maybe you can at least cut that amount down substantially, and that will mean getting out of debt sooner, and paying less interest overall. Just a thought, but I get what you are saying and that it might not be worth it.

witch's mom: I can so relate. That is one reason I'm sort of glad we went through this experience. It taught me that budgeting isn't so bad, and mostly that buying cheap isn't always so bad. I was just telling DH the other day, that even when we have money again, there are some things I will just not bring myself to pay full-price for again. Some brands I just don't care to spend more for. I've definitely noticed a big change in my spending attitudes, something I thought would never change! It gives me alot of hope for the future. :D

[rowantree]

PLEASE SUPPORT ME!! Im about to go try to sell my VW Bus. I would rather sell the big nasty car but realisticlly its just not possible with out a HUGE loss, and its more stable than the bus - and theres the whole NE Winter with no heat factor. DH loves the bus, as do I , but we need $3000 way way more. I probably can only get $200 for it but still, thats 4 months of Tahoe payments......
BBAWWAAHHH!!! if I could do those little faces Id give you a sad one :(

Camp put us into overdraft - if they cash the check before friday, thank goodness for overdraft

[Peppermint]

rowantree- here's some support for you :hug. You are doing what you have to do. ;)

Well ladies, we had a little budget scare here yesterday. We thought our refrigerator was dying, and oh how we were having trouble knowing what to do. The fridge came with the house, it is easily 20 years old, so we thought paying to have someone come fix it might be pointless, yk? Then we considered buying a used fridge, but that would be another "unknown" although possibly half as cheap. We looked around and found one for $339 online with free shipping, but it was a brand we have ever heard of :eyesroll , so then we found a frigidare one for $390. We were so unsure of what the best way to go was, Home Depot had one for $299, with a $50 shipping charge (we don't know anyone near us with a truck)- and that price was only good for yesterday, dh wanted to jump at that, but I talked him out of it. Later on, his brother called with a lead on a free 2 years used fridge for us, and said he'd let us know if we could wait a few days, we decided we could.

Oh, I'm getting awfully long-winded here, turns out the condensation on the outside of the fridge was b/c one of us had inadvertantly hit a switch for power saver on it, and it says right on there "If condensation forms on the outside of the fridge, turn power saver off.", so we did, and all appears to be ok. I am going to wait a week and put $300 that we would've used onto the credit cards.

Question- I have a few hundred dollars in an account that theoretically should go on the credit card, but I am reluctant to put it on there, b/c I am afraid something will come up (like a broken fridge), we'll have no "cushion" and then we'll use the credit card again. Then again it might be just smarter to put it on the credit card so that we're paying less interest, and then if the fridge breaks charge it, b/c the fridge may not break and the money does no good sitting in savings when we have interest sucking debt. Thoughts?

[srain]

Question- I have a few hundred dollars in an account that theoretically should go on the credit card, but I am reluctant to put it on there, b/c I am afraid something will come up (like a broken fridge), we'll have no "cushion" and then we'll use the credit card again.
Put the money on the card, unless you're in danger of losing your credit. Keeping it out so you won't possibly maybe have to use the card more doesn't really solve anything-

[Galatea]

So DH and I managed to lose his wallet with the debit card in it, and of course his SSN and insurance and all that. So sad day for us, but on the up side, in reporting the loss to the credit bureaus, we will get free reports. So we will really see how low our credit has sunk...

[Piglet68]

lilli: sorry about your DH's wallet! replacing all that ID can be such a pain! OTOH, it's great to get a free credit report. here's hoping it isn't as bad as you thought!

peppermint: I would definitely put it on the card. it's earning you very little in a savings account, and can save you alot more on monthly interest. you may not need the emergency fund for some time, but even if you do and have to use the card, you will have saved on that interest, and it will be great psychologically, too!

[rowantree]

Peppermint - ITA about putting it on the card. Also congrats on no broken fridge!!! I am still sad, thanks for the support though!!!!

I put the VW in the paper. I asked too much for it, figuring we could go down, and it would hurt less when it went. I shouldnt say too much, its worth it to someone who has the money, its in excellent shape.

[kerc]

i'm apparently among the minority when i say don't put it all on the card. my reason being that what happens when you do have the emergency -- you just put it on the card again and wham. back to square one (debt that is).

[kerc]

and umm, rowantree ---> you can buy another vw bus when you don't need the $$ so badly. I know, I know one gets attached to these sorts of things. But the peace of mind from making your bills can be attachment forming as well.

[newmainer]

Hey everyone... I'm back! I participated frequently in the first few threads but left July 1 for a long visit to see family/friends across the country. Between backpacking and not being around convenient internet access, I'm been out of the loop. I'm not back home yet, but am at least closer to a computer that is convenient.

Great to catch up with you all!! Its been hard to keep on our plan while travelling. I haven' t been able to bank as easily and my mom has been depositing checks while we're gone- but its' hard to not be home and have the same local control. I'm looking forward to being back home and in my life again. Travelling gets old.

I dont' have much else to say except that I love the new thread title :) and am looking forward to being back in the circle!!

kelly

[Galatea]

Oh, rowantree, we want a vw so bad but I think it would be against the ideal of this thread to make such a purchase! Oh well. What is it like? Dh and I want to camp around the country next summer and we would love a bus/camper. I am sorry to hear that it has to go.

[rowantree]

well not to go on about it, but its a 71, 60,000 on a new engine. it isnt a camper however, sorry lilli78!!

Im over the selling of the Bus, 5 have a wonderful 97 VW golf thats needs some attention, and if it gets the attention it will last a long long time. AND I own it out right.


does anyone know about jetblue airlines? The tickets are really cheap< like $89 one way, I need to goto my dads wedding in S Dakota.

[Galatea]

I have heard wonderful things about jetblue. The planes are new and the service is somewhat human. I have not flown them but my parents have and they said it is nice. They are always getting written up in major magazines as being great and the future of airlines.

We don't need a camper... ACK! I have to stop this fantasizing...

[PikkuMyy]

My FIL swears by JetBlue. He won't fly anything else.

Well, we decided not to do out vacation because we couldn't afford it. Which meant that I worked two extra days than originally planned. And, to top it off, thank goodness we didn't go because it turns out that when our new home equity loan got set up, they didn't set up the automatic payment properly, so this week we find out that the bank never withdrew the money and we owed them almost $600! If we'd gone on vacation, we would have had no money to pay for it. But thanks to my savings account, we were able to. Phew!

[chalupamom]

I just got back from the grocery store and we didn't make it under our $50/week goal - spent $72 this week. I'd like to try and rationalize and say, "well, this was expensive and we needed that and I used loss leaders to stock up" but the reality is we went over and that's that. I'll just have to come in under for the remaining weeks in the month. Luckily, I got some rain checks this trip that will help me do that.

Now, piglet asked me:

congrats on the extra savings to your budget! Now....what are you going to do with that extra cash each month?

Well, it's not really extra unfortunately. We're still running a deficit so the cash is just going to be allocated to something else. I'm still hoping to pursuade my husband to sell the one car and that will bring us into non-deficit status. Even though the payment is only $199 for a really nice Passat, there's still the matter of keeping three gas tanks full and three cars insured and three sets of brakes and oil and and and and... We don't have any consumer debt (yet - although I can kind of feel it coming on, you know?) but my student loans require service of over $600 even with the refinancing. If we get rid of the extra car, we should free up almost $300 a month that can go toward keeping the credit cards unused and avoiding late fees on other stuff. I think we owe about $8,000 and we can probably get about that much for it.

And, although I know it's not necessarily popular here, I'm collecting stuff to put into Ebay. I may only net $8 or so per hour but it's more than I'd have otherwise and we donate stuff, too, which helps keep our material karma good as well as helps with taxes. If I can get a couple hundred with that it'll also help with consumer debt avoidance as fall approaches and we need firewood and have a birthday party to throw.

[Galatea]

And, although I know it's not necessarily popular here, I'm collecting stuff to put into Ebay.

Um, what makes ebaying bad? I have not heard of this.

[chalupamom]

Um, what makes ebaying bad?

Oh, ebaying isn't "bad" per se. I was referring to discussions, both in these debt reduction threads and in other places around MDC, exploring the time/value ratio of ebaying. Some women have found that their "earnings" from ebay simply aren't worth their time when they could be doing other financially valuable things. Others, like me, are finding that the time we can squeeze into ebaying doesn't necessarily detract from other economically useful activities and the pennies it brings in add up.

It's all a matter of perspective!

[lunamama]

Hi there, I am a newbie posting to this thread but not to reading it...I have been following along for over a month now and I have decided to finally post.
This thread helps me to remember my goals for this summer which is to pay off most of our debt.
In April I ordered my dh's and my credit reports....YIKES!!! They were messy. I have been working to pay off the debts on there plus other monies owed that werent reported. I have pretty much cleared up dh's report except for one thing which I cannot find any proof of and I am trying to dispute. This is not easy...I just recieved a letter from 2 credit bureaus saying that I didnt dispute it correctly and they cannot investigate...UGH!!! what a bummer...I need HELP with this part of the credit game...anyways...
Since June I have paid off $1200 in debt and by the end of August I will have shelled out $1873...not counting about a grand in credit card payments. The reason I dont count cc's is because we are still in the habit of using them and then paying off big chunks. I bought an air conditioner with mine last week etc.
I feel really good about all of this...there is about $1000 in bills on my credit report that I cannot deal with this year...honestly the stress isnt worth it...the claims are illegal and I just dont have the resources to dispute it...it falls off in Oct of next year so hopefully it wont be reported again and I can let go of it....hopefully.
Anyways, I am pretty psyched about the burdon being gone...it is going ot be a really nice feeling when all of this stuff is taken care of. Most of this is old debt....irresponsible but neccessary debt from when we lived in Phoenix...in order to get out of that city we had to choose no to pay off a bunch of stuff so we could essentially escape. They really set that city up so you make just enough to get by and now we can finally pay it all off...
I have been slowing working on paying off debt every year....things that accumulate, old debt....I am finally seeing the light...we are really close!
I just wanted to add that you ladies have been an inspiration to me to keep on the debt-reduction train. If it werent for an earlier thread I never would have bought The Simple Living Guide that manifested itself the day after I read about it here at a local coffee shop.....pretty cool...
We will still have a student loan leftover but that isnt really getting us into trouble or holding us back so much...we can tackle this next!!!!
It is really hard for young people just starting out I think....it is so easy to accumulate so much debt because of inexperience or just plain old low paychecks. We are finally getting out of that cycle...YAY!!!!
Anyways....thanks!

[angel04345]

Hey girls! I just wanted to write to let you know I am still here! :LOL Today my daughter and I went to the beach it cost us 1.57 since we needed to get my daughter a floaty! I don't think that was unreasonable! DH and I spent a lot of money this weekend that we shouldn't have so this weekend we are just staying home. We will just watch movies we already own and hang out with our daughter. (have to make up for the 100$ we blew last weekend!) Oh yes has anyone had experience shopping around for hotels??? I have a wedding to go to this month and I need to book it now for the end of the month. I would like to get a cheaper rate. Any suggestions? Oh thanks for the link to make a sling! I am going to have to check it out and get moving on it! Oh and good news I sold some of DD's dipes to help off set the cost of new dipes! (certainly couldn't do that when she was using sposies!) Well got to get going to bed forgot the floaty in the car. Imagine what the heat would do to that!!! Well have a good day girls and happy saving! Oh and my opinion on putting the savings onto the credit card is DON'T DO IT!!! IMO everyone should have atleast 1,000$ in their savings for ANYTHING that could happen! What if your car TOTALLY died and you still have to pay on it! Atleast you could go get a clunker and just own it! What if you just needed something like meds for your child! Why charge it when you could just pay yourself back! NO INTEREST!!! WOO HOOO Hope that helps anyone!

[Peppermint]

Hi ladies- well I decided to put half the money from savings on the CCs, since you all were split on it too :LOL- the "put it all on the CC" people almost had me before the others chimed in ;) .

Doing pretty good here, we have been "in the black" at least since I started this thread and have aquired no new debt during this time.

My next challenge- ds's birthday next month- I am tempted to buy him an over $100 gift- but am sure that if I work at it can think of something just as nice for less money- maybe have dh make something. I am thinking a firehouse dollhouse, as he's REALLY into firemen and will be turning 3. I am going to send out a mass e-mail to my Mom's Club to see if anyone has a firetruck cake pan I can borrow, otherwise I'll just have dh draw one on top of the cake with frosting :thumb .

The urge to adopt a child is getting forever stronger and really strengthening my committment to getting out of debt and accumulating savings ASAP. And you ladies are my rock :love , thank you.

Anyone with news/updates?

[angel04345]

That is wonderful that you are wanting to adopt! I would LOVE to adopt a child! My husband doesn't think that he could love an adopted child the same. I don't think it would matter to me! They are all little miracles! Anyways congratulations!

[PikkuMyy]

ARGH! I HATE COMPUTERS!!! (There are some keyboard shortcuts for going back and forward on Internet Explorer and I keep unconsciously pressing some combination while typing that sends me back and then when I come back to this page, my post is deleted. Any ideas?)

Anyway, as I was saying...

Clark Howard, king of radio finance advice, says never put all spare cash towards CCs, always have a savings account.

If we hadn't had a savings account, we would have had to take money out as a cash advance from the CC (acruing high finance charges and a fee) to pay for the home equity loan I explained about earlier. So it was really good that I'd put it in savings instead and could easily transfer it.

[kerc]

ok first: firetruck birthday cakes. my dh LOVED firemen. wanted to wear a firehat (you know the 3 dollar plastic kind) every place he went. wouldn't wear shorts bc he thought firemen didn't (then saw them wearing shorts at a firehouse and overnight would wear shorts). anyhow...MIL made a firetruck cake. Basically a rectangle with lichorice (sp?) ladder and wheels made of oreos.

and over 100 dollar gift....what's the item in question?

second. good call peppermint on spliting the cash. I think that was a great way to spend it.

and finally...i've had a rough week. I had a single male (childless) colleague in town for the week. He's a post-doc, I am a phd student. He's working on the same research project as me. Instead of bringing my lunch everyday I forked over $$ for lunch out every day. Thing is I didn't really eat well. All the food I had was not great. I took him back to the airport this morning, have loads of work to do on the research project and will be eating well all next week.

[Peppermint]

ok first: firetruck birthday cakes. my dh LOVED firemen. wanted to wear a firehat (you know the 3 dollar plastic kind) every place he went. wouldn't wear shorts bc he thought firemen didn't (then saw them wearing shorts at a firehouse and overnight would wear shorts). anyhow...MIL made a firetruck cake. Basically a rectangle with lichorice (sp?) ladder and wheels made of oreos.

and over 100 dollar gift....what's the item in question?

Kerc- Great idea on the cake! :) I admit though, I was :LOL about your "DH" loving firemen and wearing the plastic helmet everywhere
:laugh: . I got what you meant though ;) , at least I hope so :p .

The gift was a firehouse dollhouse from a catalogue (see were not that creative), just had thought of buying the one in the catalogue instead of making it.

Ah- lunches out- I know it's fine to be all frugal, but when old friends come to town, you do feel the need to "take them out", so sympathies there.

[Kerry]

[I was just telling DH the other day, that even when we have money again, there are some things I will just not bring myself to pay full-price for again. Some brands I just don't care to spend more for. I've definitely noticed a big change in my spending attitudes, something I thought would never change! It gives me alot of hope for the future. :D[/QUOTE]

Just curious what those things are?

[MaryLang]

Rowantree- I'm so sorry about your VW. I have a superbeetle that was my first car. Its in the garage still runs great but needs body work, anyway I don't think I could ever sell it, I know hard hard it would be emotionally. I guess if I really needed to I would sell it to family in hopes of buying it back one day.
Everything is going good here, know on wood. I still don't have any money, but our closing date for our home equity loan is Tues., and then we can breathe. I'm glad we are getting this under control, because we're having #2 in the spring!

[bamboogrrrl]

Hey everybody! I just read through so much progress in this tread while I've been away that it made me smile. Just got back from my GOOD vacation, or rather, a GREAT vacation. I spent the first week at home trying to catch up on random home stuff (like hauling the big rag rug to the laundry after the dog puked on it), declutter (a few bags to Sal's and a nice receipt), did some writing (which is always a cheap thrill). I got about 5 more pages into an essay I'm working on, which was almost my goal. Close counts...

The second week we spent in a rustic mountain cabin for FREE because I was invited back from last year to be artist in residence again, and DH could tag along. We probably hiked about 25-30 largely vertical miles. Our hikes took us to many private gorgeous vistas with a little nekkid sunbathing tossed in. It was truly heaven. We had dinner out three times (but it could have been worse), went to a concert that we had to pay for, and I played a tennis tournament for the last two days, but at least it ALL fed my soul and involved no debt.

Hauled along a couple of books I'd been meaning to read on my residency ("How to Survive Without a Salary" by Charles Long - a few good points in it but not great, and "Making a Living Without a Job" by Barbara Winter - wonderful, but a little too new agey sometimes). I wanted to use part of the residency to really think about my next adventures in life.
My day job has been horrible since my boss was busted in May for embezzling (your hard earned tax dollars at work!), and I'd like to pay more attention to my writing anyway. This area has never been great jobwise, so nothing else has panned out yet. One of the things I learned form the latter book was to think of my job as simply one income stream. When I listed out other income streams, we actually had several. DH and I also brainstormed some other ideas for income streams that could work, and maybe it COULD actually work. But it's scary - I've been the one with the steady job with all the bennies for a long time, and it's hard to leap.

Our house became worth like a bazillion dollars after 9/11, and the impulse to cash out and take some time off is compelling, but we'd have to leave the area for someplace cheaper. And maybe we could never afford to come back. It's really a dilemma. Anyway, my mom had a good suggestion: that we should start closely checking out some areas we think could work and go visit. I got to think more about this for a week in a serene place, instead of from the desperation I feel at work, which was a good thing. The goal now? To plot an excellent Houdini Plan... Waddya think?

[kerc]

And maybe we could never afford to come back. It's really a dilemma. Anyway, my mom had a good suggestion: that we should start closely checking out some areas we think could work and go visit. I got to think more about this for a week in a serene place, instead of from the desperation I feel at work, which was a good thing. The goal now? To plot an excellent Houdini Plan... Waddya think?


I think it sounds like a fantastic trip. I agree that it makes it easier to think of a bad job as a way to get from point a to point b (in this case to get the $$ in the bank). And your mom has great ideas.

I dunno I'm a wimp. I can't move someplace without a job.

[witch's mom]

Hi everybody,

Bamboogrrl, what a great trip. And I totally relate to the job dilemma. We're dealing with it at our house with regards to DH's job, which has great benefits, but lately has become a scheduling problem. For the last five years, we've worked a carefully orchestrated system of hours so that one of us is always home with the DDs, and now that DH's company is "shaving hours" and moving people's schedules around, it's becoming a problem. It's also writing on the wall, because the industry he works in (grocery) is in the process of totally changing how it does business. We're considering the possibility of him changing industries entirely, but it'd likely require a pay cut, a benefits slash, not sure what all.

In other possible financial news, the VCR blew up last night. Literally caught on fire and melted inside. It wouldn't kill us to live without a VCR, so I'm not ready to see this as a potential expense. But DH, who is out of town right now and hasn't heard about this yet, is likely to view it as an excuse to purchase a DVD player.

Meanwhile, the grocery bill is looking better than last month, but not as good as I'd like it to. I remain committed . . .

[singermom]

Excuse me for jumping in here--I generally just :lurk: on these g.o.o.d. threads, but I had the most frustrating conversation with a cc company yesterday, and I just have to ask if others have had this experience...

The background: DH and I accumulated a lot of debt due to his divorce and him starting his own business. Some (not all) is credit card debt, which is what we have been focusing on paying off first.

So we got one of my cards paid off this month--YAY! Only when I call the company to cancel the card, I LITERALLY cannot get off the phone with the guy!! He's wanting to know the rates of my other cards, and says he'll transfer the amount from one onto the other (not that he'll lower my interest rate or anything...). I said no a couple of times, but this guy just wouldn't give up! At this point my toddler had woken up from her nap and was crying, so I just cut the call off and said I would call back. But I was steaming! I mean, who controls my money anyway?

Anyway, the upshot is now I'm more determined than ever to pay off this stupid cc debt, and am going to cut all those cards up. I don't think we will ever be able to go to a completely cash-only lifestyle, but after that experience, I am more willing to try!

Mia

[angel04345]

Well Singer mom I am glad that we got to hear from you! :) Well IMO paying in cash or borrowing from yourself is the ONLY way to live! We will never finance again and all the bills except our car that is a whopping 189.00 a month will be paid off in February 2005. :love Well Some good news is Molly Marie made her entrance at 3:52 am! I am an aunt again! (It never loses its appeal, not as nice as your own but you don't have to get up all night either! :D ) Oh and DD's med bill came for the month of May 2004 and it totaled 18.00. Mind you it is the same care that she recieved in April for her ears but for some reason they are covering a LOT more of the bill! HMMMMMM :irked: Well I have to get going but I wanted to share good and bad news with the good club! Bye ladies have a great afternoon!

[Galatea]

Singermom, I am under the impression that you should not cancel the cards once you pay them off. It is better for your credit rating to have open credit that is not near the limit than closed credit you paid off. You could freeze or cut up your cards (or give them to your dad as I did) so you don't use them but you should not close them. Anyone know any different?

[kerc]

once you've paid them off, you don't really need to have tons and tons of cards open. one will do. (if it isn't at the limit).

I ordered my credit rating the other day. It looks decent, much better than I thought :) I have student loans, cc, the cars...it all adds up but nothing was late and nothing extraneous. I need to wait till next month to order hubby's. His should be good too. We just wanted to look because someone told us they had a hard time finding the mortgage, etc. due to the hyphenated last name.

[miss_sonja]

So we got one of my cards paid off this month--YAY! Only when I call the company to cancel the card, I LITERALLY cannot get off the phone with the guy!! He's wanting to know the rates of my other cards, and says he'll transfer the amount from one onto the other (not that he'll lower my interest rate or anything...). I said no a couple of times, but this guy just wouldn't give up! At this point my toddler had woken up from her nap and was crying, so I just cut the call off and said I would call back. But I was steaming! I mean, who controls my money anyway?

Good for you! :clap

FYI, most card companies want the request to cancel in writing. So, just send them a letter signed by both of you, saying you want to cancel and stating that no balance is owed. They'll probably write back giving you some great offer, but they have to cancel if you so request.

[chalupamom]

FYI, most card companies want the request to cancel in writing. So, just send them a letter signed by both of you, saying you want to cancel and stating that no balance is owed. They'll probably write back giving you some great offer, but they have to cancel if you so request.

We've cancelled over the phone successfully when we've asked for a written confirmation. The confirmation comes in the mail usually within 10 days or so and we file it with our credit and tax info.

One of the things we've found is that if a company didn't make much money off of you, then you won't be hassled when you try to cancel. We had one card that we specifically got only for the good balance transfer deal. Once it was paid off (and we never charged anything on it) we called to close and they didn't blink an eye. Other cards where we paid much more interest or used them often we had a tougher time. Still, once you ask for that confirmation, they're going to close it for you.

[Piglet68]

kerc: where did you get your credit report from? I'm so loathe to pay for one (geez, it's MY information!) but I think it's important to at least see what others are seeing!

Here's my report for the week:

Balanced the checkbook/budget sheet yesterday and we are way ahead of the game. Thanks to the increase in my paycheck (added baby Sasha to our deductions) and having paid off one debt already, we are doing great. Unfortunately, we can't funnel that into any more debt reduction because we have a bunch of extra expenses due to moving. I've had to put down $1000 for our apartment, and also buy plane tickets for my Mum to come out here and fly with me and DD back home (mostly airmiles, but still had to fork out almost $500). The good news is, we don't have to beg any family for money just yet. With the great state of our budget, and our line of credit, we can do this on our own.

Of course, the future is still unknown. DH doesn't have a job secured yet (though the interview process is chugging along). And we will be borrowing some money from FIL to tide us over for the next couple of months until DH gets a regular paycheck (which we have no idea as to the amount, making things even more unknown). Our property has been relisted, and we're hoping it will sell soon, thus ending our debt problems. In the meantime, we're taking it one month at a time!

[A&A]

I ordered my credit rating the other day.


Please tell me how to do this. Thanks!

[kerc]

i paid for mine. if you've been denied credit you can get one for free (how screwed up is that?). anyhow. I think I paid like 40 bucks and it came online.

www.transunion.com I think. all the major companies do it. What are the major companies?
transunion
experian
equifax

I think I tried www.experian.com in the past and had a major snafu -- I paid but they didn't deliver my credit report via the web. eventually they did return my $$ but still it was a hassle.

I went ahead and paid an extra 10 bucks and can see all 3 credit ratings. Which is helpful because they AREN"T ALL THE SAME!!! what the heck is that? some list my address currently as the address I used 7 years ago. :eek


Piglet -- great news on beginning the moving process. Crossing my fingers that your property will sell fast.

[newmainer]

Hey everyone-

well, we're finally back in our own house after a ridiculous 5 week visit/vacation to California to visit my in-laws and various friends. I will *never* do that again- that is, 5 weeks. Poor dd showed signs of stress after about 2 weeks, her sleeping schedule is way off, and we came home to 7 piles of mail and our financial tracking is a mess. Two weeks maximum in the future...

I wish I had something g.o.o.d to report, but I don't. Our plumbing bill came finally from the remodel, which we are payign off with money we had been allocating for a credit card we had to use in a lean month earlier in the spring. Plus, dh's laptop died right as we were leaving for the trip so he had to buy another one. It's a business write off, but still out of our pocket in the meantime. I'm trying hard not to feel completely discouraged. Reading how you all are doing and moving ahead is helping. I have to keep remembering that this is a long term process- our debt is not going to disappear overnight.

I have signed up for a table with a friend at a craft fair, and I got a bunch of new fleece for my sewing, so hopefully that will actually turn some profit, or at least pay for what I"ve put into it. I"m a little nervous that I won't sell anything and will feel dumb for the investment- but, nothing ventured nothing gained.

ok, i only allotted myself 15 minutes for computer time. Got to go finish some curtains I started last night.

K

[angel04345]

Hey girls! I have the credit report info. Here is a number for equifax you are entitled to one free report a year and then when you are denied credit you are allowed one to explore that. Here is the number 1800-290-8749. Also here in maine we have a website its state.me.gov that is where I got the info on getting my report. Also when reviewing my report I had a credit line open and it was bringing my score down. Because you COULD use it thus changing your monthly debt to income ratio. So we canceled it.
Recently we decided to commit to putting forty dollars a month in our savings account through direct deposit. We go through ING direct which offers a much higher interest rate then local banks. Other then that we are using extra money to pay down debt. But even when paying off debt we need to build our future at the same time! Really nothing new here other then that info I thought would be helpful. Well have a nice day everyone!

[kerc]

we had a major scare yesterday afternoon (kinda long, bear with me). Dh is adjunct faculty at the local cc. He teaches something like 6 credits. when you teach more than 5 credits you're on the "normal" payscale (he's paid at 40% time). When you teach less than 5 credits you're paid per class -- 2000 bucks or so per class, vs 5grand per class. Anyhow...yesterday he got an email with the listing of classes that were cancelled for fall. And he read "american history to 1685" but did not continue reading the time and location -- so he came running in and said "they cancelled one of my classes!"

I said "Oh SHIT!" Then had like 10 minutes to process and thought this is ok -- we'll sell a car, take dd out of daycare and borrow the other 1000 bucks we'll need. (DH and I are both hoping this is the last year of graduate school for us so we need daycare to make it right now). Then I went and looked at dh's email message, caught that the time/location was not correct and that they had actually cancelled another section of this class. whew... instant relief. The good news is that i was reminded of how easy come easy go money is these days and instead of saying "when we go back to real money this fall" I need to maintain my sense of poverty and I will maybe finally get a little $$ in the bank for security.

[MamaMonica]

Bamboogirrl- about the books- have you read "Unjobbing?" Don't remember the author but it was a nice little book. Not something applicable to us right now, but it had great points.

This is a great thread. Wishing everyone good luck!

We've been consistently making an extra payment to our remaining debt- our mortgage for the past 5 months.

We spent so much last month I wasn't sure we could do the extra payment, but I wrote the check anyway.

Sometimes I'm disheartened by how much is left on the mortgage and wondering if we can really pay this off. The extra payments feel like a drop in the bucket, but I know it adds up. I wish I had started this years ago, but there is no going back.

Everyone had told me that mortgage was a good debt- I didn't think how much interest we were paying over the life of the loan. If I'd started the extra payments ten years ago, we'd be in better shape now.

[bamboogrrrl]

Kerc: That IS majorly scary. Glad it all worked out in the end. Yoga breathing...

Monnie: What is the full title of the book you mentioned? I looked up "unjobbing" and found nothing on amazon. Know what you mean about the mortgage. It helped me to break it down into yearly goals. Like "I want to pay the mortgage down to x by December." It gave me something tangible to shoot for so I don't lose interest (no pun intended!). I was also a victim of the "good debt" thinking. I'm getting more radical and now think most/all debt is bad debt, with the worst debt (CC) being the first we need to get rid of.

Welcome back newmainer! Sounds like a stressful trip. Don't get too down on yourself about your recent spending. We gotta remember: "progress, not perfection." And YMOYL life says "No shame, no blame." You'll reign it in...

[Indigo73]

The book is Un-jobbing by Michael Folger.

[Piglet68]

I understand the interest must be frustrating, but just be thankful you HAVE a mortgage. I'm starting to get really antsy about buying a place. We're hoping to be able to do this by next year when our apartment lease runs out. I'm tired of moving and tired of living in places that aren't worth putting money into to fix up the way I want.

Thanks for all the credit info, ladies. Since we're moving back to Canada, I think I'm going to skip getting my US credit report - I'll do it if we move back here again. In the meantime, I did get a free credit report (my "one a year" when we were last in Canada), some of the info was outdated, but we move around so much and things change so much....ugh. I guess I should start getting it straightened out.

Have a G.O.O.D. weekend, everyone! :D

[MamaMonica]

Soory I forgot the hyphen in "Un-jobbing!" I had a hard time finding it at the library I remember because of that...

Good luck with everything, Piglet. I am grateful to have a mortgage and a house. So much to be thankful for. I just realized after re-reading YMOL how the norm is to have debt and it takes more radical thinking to realize that without the debt, you have more options.

Bamboogirl- thanks for the perspective! I'm thinking of how much the mortgage will go down by the end of the year. It keeps me motivated not to spend.

[kerc]

good debt vs. bad debt -- i agree it is all debt. I mean without any debt then there's no REQUIREMENT to work -- sure yu have to pay taxes, utilities and food, etc. but you can probably do that on a 20 hr a week kinda job. I think it gives you flexibility for the "oh no" times in your life -- death, illness, birth, etc.

piglet -- if yu can get a us credit report for free, I'd go ahead and do it now to be sure no one's stealing your name, etc. Problems would be easier to clear up now and it is probably very good anyhow.

Mortgages -- better than rent, i agree. but the interest amount is staggering.

[newmainer]

Thanks bamboogrrl for the welcome back...

I just have to share the best welcome home we got... warm blueberry muffins on our doorstep the morning after our return!! I stepped out the door to go to the grocery store to get something for breakfast and there they were! I love our neighborhood :love

I started freaking out again today about our debt load and how we are ever going to make a significant debt. Dh and I talked about me going back to work again part-time, but it isn't feasible. We won't put dd in daycare, both becuase we dont' want to and because the cost isnt' worth it, and he can't cut his hours to accomdate me working because he makes about 4 times what i could get around here.

So, we decided we would review all of our expenses to try and trim back more, like health insurance (just reviewing, not giving up), definitley car insurance (anyone have any good cheap carriers? we're paying $1200 a year right now for Geico), and maybe a couple other things. I am going to start doing his books which will free him up for more billable hours, and we can also claim me as an employee and thus write off our health insurance premiums. Hopefully that will save us some cash come tax time.

so, breathing again. Hoping my craft venture and birth classes also pick up and start to bring in some dough. We need it.

[angel04345]

Hello everyone! I hope everyone has had an excellent weekend! I think that we did well this weekend (haven't done grocerys yet though! :LOL ) We have been keeping debt in mind, saving in mind, and living in mind. We want to still enjoy our lives if it means spending two dollars to rent a movie and watch it with our daughter, or gas to get to the park to play with her then so be it. As long as we are not going over the budget allowed for family time! (Although shes been a little emotional so we have not done a lot outside of our home.) We have begun shopping for her bday too which has been fun. We are having a nemo theme and my mom is making the nemo cake for her bday gift. (one of many I'm sure!)
New Mainer you mentioned childbirth classes? What kinds do you do? Or did I misunderstand? Well I have to get going we are having company soon! Talk to you all later and GOOD luck!

[kathsmom]

Hello, mamas! I am so sorry that I haven't been around much lately. I have been trying to get DD ready to go back to school and DS came down with Hand, Foot, and Mouth disease and has been in major pain this past weekend. Hopefully, DD didn't pick up any of the germs!

Well, we have not had that great of a time financially lately. We have had a lot of medical bills this year for DS getting sick (ear infections, rotovirus, reactive airway disease - like asthma, hand/foot/mouth disease). Even though these aren't major illnesses, all the doctor visits and prescriptions cost money.

DH actually got a commission check that was about $300 more than he thought he would get, so we are going to pay off the credit card. Woohoo!

I have been trying to read all the posts, but have to do it a little at a time since DS has been so clingy and I have been functioning on very little sleep! Keep up the G.O.O.D work, ladies!

[newmainer]

Hey kathsmom- welcome back! congrats on paying off a credit card. I am dreaming of that day and its motivating to hear that others actually do it!
angel- i am starting the certification program for Birthing From Within classes. Hopefully in the fall I"ll be in a position to start teaching a few workshops.

Well, my g.o.o.d news... i lowered our car insurance by $28.00 whoo- hoo! (sarcastically). Its a start. This is only by changing things with our current provider- Geico. Hopefully calling around a few other places will yield some better savings. Since we lease our car, though, we need to have a cerain level of coverage.

I called on one credit card charge that i thought was bogus but turned out to be legit :(. Why were we using a credit card, you might ask? ugh. don't.

I bought a 500 minute calling card at Walmart for $25 and am going to cancel our unlimited long distance plan through Verizon. Between the calling card and using dh's business line, which has the unlimited plan but is a write off, hopefully we'll be fine. I think 500 minutes is a lot. And even if we use it all in a month (like I have time to talk on the phone!!), its $25 instead of the 40 we are probably paying for unlimited.

That's a bit it for now. Have a stack of books to log on Amazon, and a yard sale to plan. But, in the mean time, off to sew. take care, mamas.

[alison77]

hey ladies - i'm new to the get out of debt threads, but want to join in. dh and i need to make some big changes to our lifestyle. we've got a fair amount of credit card debt, and then we both have student loans that we haven't been able to touch yet. we were living with my mom for a while to save money, then moved out, now b/c i've been going through some depression, we're moving back in. it kills me to think that if we had just stayed there over the past year we could have saved all that money in rent and utilities, though i think that i would have crashed earlier, so perhaps there's a balance here. i've decided to cut to part time to be with ds more, and dh is a student and waits tables at night. our goal is to reduce our credit card debt and not add anything on to it, and start saving some money for travel, etc., but i think it's going to take a lot of willpower. i love shopping. i do think that i've been better about buying some things recently, but not as good as i should be. the truth is, we really don't need anything, we just want it. also we love to eat out. i want to work on setting a fairly strict (but not painful) budget where we are getting out of our debt and increasing our savings. where to start? does anyone have any good budgeting tools?

[Peppermint]

kathsmom- GREAT for you for paying off the CC! Woo Hoo! I can't wait to be able to say that, even for just one card would be nice.

newmainer- Welcome back, it must be very hard to keep finances on track when traveling, but now that you are home you should be able to get going again.

We had a bad weekend for being in the "GOOD" mindset. We went to a Celtic Festival that we thought would be worth the $18 admission, but it wasn't, then the kids got cranky there after lunch (I had packed a picnic lunch :thumb ), so I paid $9 for hot pretzels and an ice cream. What a waste of $27 :shake

Ah well, I just move forward. It actually bothers me more to "waste" $27 than to spend $100 on something worthwhile.

Ladies, I have been thinking on the Life Insurance thing, and came across this:
http://www.bankrate.com/dls/news/insurance/insuranceguide2004/money-back1.asp

Thoughts? Right now dh and I both have whole life coverage for $100,000 each, which would be enough for either of us to live (very frugally) until the kids were all in school and we could go back to work (if the other one died), there would be nothing for college, or any extra at all, and we are paying $130/month for this coverage. We are happy not to be "throwing the money away", but would like more coverage (ideally) at a lower cost.

I am so glad that even though we are slowing down a bit with posting, that we are all still committed to the "GOOD" life. (I love that acronym).

:love

[Piglet68]

Wow, insurance must be different here in the US. We have a $1 million policy on DH and it only costs us $85 (Cdn) a month. I know I should get some insurance too, but he's the main breadwinner right now and frankly, we can't afford it.

kerc: that's a good point about getting the US report, too. I suppose I'll have to get it online, unless they are willing to mail it to me in canada.

I'm battling two medical bill charges. One for almost $200 for a procedure that simply must have been billed wrong. The administration is looking into it and I'm hoping they can get it settled. The other is for $450 and I have to write an official appeal for that one. Ugh. Health care in this country sucks. We never paid for anything in Canada (other than our monthly premiums, which are only $108/month for all three of us).

We're having a tough budget month, as I described above. We're well into our overdraft account due to plane tickets and apartment deposits. I plan to pay that all off when I get paid at the end of this month. It means, of course, taking most of my paycheck, but at least we won't have that debt hanging over our heads. I'm so debt-averse now....another good thing to come out of this club.

The hard part is we're in budget limbo right now b/c DH doens't have a job yet and we have no idea what our monthly income is going to be. While we plan to be frugal, it's hard to budget when you have a big lump sum in your account and don't know how long it has to last.

alison: I used to love shopping too, but you know what I found out? If I don't go to malls, I don't shop and I don't even want anything b/c I don't see it. It sounds simple but it truly works. I never go to malls unless I have a specific item to buy, and that is rare. Oh, I do go with my mum when she visits b/c she loves to shop, but she also loves to buy me stuff so then it's okay, lol!

newmainer: I go through regular "freak outs", usually triggered by my pregnancy-induced insomnia. Nothing like being wide awake at 4 am staring at the ceiling to make you start to worry. We've been moving around, changing jobs, etc for the last three years. We did it to be home for the kids, and I totally don't regret it. And it's been fun. But I'm just so OVER it now. I want to buy a place and get settled in one city and be able to fill out a form and not have ten different addresses, none of which were longer than a few months, lol. With DH not having a job, and a new prospect that has come up for next year in Chicago, I have no sense of permanence right now. Oh well, I have to muddle through life one month at a time. Usually I'm pretty upbeat about it, but I do go through my worry phases - we'll never own a place, we'll never get out of debt, we'll never have savings/retirement...blah blah blah. It's unfounded, I know...but still I worry!

[kerc]

piglet ---> be gentle on yourself. these pregnancy days of uncertainty are very tough. My dd followed months and months of the kind of uncertainty that being in a phd program brings. Make that being pregnant in a phd program (and married to a phd candidate to boot!). prospect in chicago? for you or for dh?

malls ---> we moved to duluth, mn and suddenly the mall was no longer a good destination. they didn't have my favorite stores so i didn't want to go. it has saved us tons of cash. i used to buy a lot of things like the t shirt at a remarkable deal, but then had nothing to go with it. Now I think in terms of outifts -- do I own something already it matches? do they have pants that are reasonably priced and fit? -- I do the same with erin's clothes and it is fabulous.

groceries for the last month have been crazy for me. Plus we had to pay the organic csa farm for winter shares this month. We ate very well from the freezer last night so it can be done. I'm trying to make it to satuyrday without buying any groceries. I'm sure it can be done. dd had bread and dip for breakfast, don't tell the bad parent patrol!

[A&A]

Here is my goal, in writing, for all to see: Get out of cc debt by Oct. 1, 2005. Wish me luck.

[A&A]

PS. I'm going to keep a list of things I want, but have refrained from buying. So, far, my list is up to $114.53

[newmainer]

welcome allison! This is a great thread- I think you'll get a lot out of it. A lot of us have read, Your Money or Your Life (*available at the library, usually) which is amazing for resetting your whole outlook on shopping and spending money. Its not about budgeting, its about living frugally but not depriving yourself. To quote the book," Budgets, like diets, do not work." I tried budgeting for years, and this truly is the first thing that has really clicked for us. The Tightwad Gazette is another good one. I don't use the ideas so much as the inspiration.

o, and malls have never been my issue- its local boutiques and bookstores! ugh!

Re: Life Insurance. We dont have any, I think. Well, my grandmother has a very small policy for me. Like 10,000. I was just quoted 300,000 for dh at only $28.00 a month. Soooo, those who are paying more might want to shop around. This is through Allstate. I don't think we're going to get it right now, though it might be stupid. We need to discuss it more. Oh, I know the thing that bothered me. Its only for 20 years, and then its done. You've paid all this money, and if you don't use it, its over and i guess you sign up for another, more expensive, policy because you're older and there's more risk. Hmmm. Don't know about that. Though, since we have jack for savings, it might be prudent.

My GOOD deeds:

- Going to the grocery store on Monday's only. its' been working. I do pop back in on Wednesday just to get raw milk because its delievered late Tuesday afternoon. I think this week I will try to plan to get us through next Tuesday so I can really make it only once a week. Spending a bit more than we'd like, but I think we can trim it. My goal is under $100 a week with organic food.

- Cancelled our long distance. We have only local now, for $31 a month (down from $75 for an unlimited calling plan), and then I bought a calling card with $500 prepaid minutes for $25 at Walmart. The only thing that sucks about it is that you have to listen to stupid Walmart ads before it dials. I hate that. Might try to find a non-ad card, if that's possible. Anyone got one?

-Resisted buying dd a nice Waldorf doll for her first doll. Just couldnt' justify the $50, as nice as it was. Bought a little one for $10. I think I might get one of the waldorf kits and sew one myself for a Christmas present.

Our first craft fair is rapidly approaching!! (sept. 11th) I am nervous i am not going to sell anything, but keeping a positive outlook. I need to seriously start putting in the hours sewing.

So, that's us. Dh is working a bit less now, which financially is a bit nervewracking, but its great to see him more.

GOOD luck all!

[kerc]

ok i am in serious need of a jump start. we are spending $$ left and right. It is planned, but I need to remind myself of the end goal (and that I am not alone in this).

we're remodeling the basement right now and I just want to hire someone to do it. but we got a bid on installing a window that was like 700 bucks more than we expected so I am revisiting my goals for this project. 700 bucks....my family could vacation in style for that. so....babysitter for the kiddo and i think we will be doing it ourselves. urgh. I want this project done.

[Peppermint]

Yes Kerc, we need to get this thread moving again. I think doing it yourself is a GREAT idea, but dh and I are home improvement nuts :nut . You can log onto www.hgtv.com for instructions for all kinds of home improvement stuff.

We are doing ok, a few slips here and there, like I bought SIL's b-day gift though I could've taken the time to make her something. I managed to spend nothing on my trip to visit my brother, dh couldn't go, so my dad went with me and insisted on paying gas, tolls and meals, and brother and SIL didn't let me buy any meals while we were there either.

Dh got a $3000 raise at his year review, we would've needed $8000 to make up for our medical insurance costs, but, at least he got something. This should allow us to live "in the black" while being very frugal, the past few months we have been relying on selling stuff off and cashing in a life insurance policy of mine to stay in the black.

Dh is going for a new job, which would be great if he gets it, it is doubtful that the money would be much better, but no doubt the insurance would be as he'd be working for a college, and most importantly, he would be happier as his current job is awful. Right now he is making $38,000, we figure that with good medical insurance he could take the new job (if they offer it to him) for around $30,000 and still be able to make ends meet.

Dh is designing something new for us to sell on ebay, something that I am hoping will sell really well, esp. around Christmas as it would be a great gift item, so, maybe we'll be able to pay off more debt if it takes off like I am hoping.

On a GOOD/frugal related note, I got some new clothes for me and dd yesterday. SIL had a bunch of clothes she had tried to sell at MIL's garage sale but they didn't sell, so she was going to take them all to Salvation Army, so I went through them and found 3 shirts, 2 pair of pants and a jacket- for nothing :D , decent stuff, mostly Old Navy which I like :). Then CIL (cousin in law ;) ) had a bag of hand me downs for dd, lots of cute stuff, mostly stuff that will fit her next summer, but, some rain boots and a pair of black dress shoes too.

Both of my kids need new shoes right now, so I am going to check out AJ Wright after Mass, they usually have discounted Stride Rite shoes, I can usually find something for dd there, but ds has extra wide feet (darn him :LOL) so, I'll probably have to buy his full price (well, at least on sale ;) at the shoe store.

How's that for an update? :)

How is everyone else holding up? Piglet- how is your dh's job search going?

[newmainer]

More inspiration needed here too... I think its hard to stay in the mindset all the time. not that i'm spending wildly, but the goal gets a little fuzzy, kwim?

overall, we're doing ok. i am doing *much, much* better at shopping only once a week and really meal planning. The two times I ran to the store to get something, it was for one item, which is all i walked out with (ice cream once :) and half and half for coffee). This morning, we are out of milk, eggs, butter, bread... so dh had left over eggplant parmesan for breakfast :eyesroll . oh well, tomorrow is shopping day.

i've also sold about $150 worth of books on amazon. mostly our old stuff. I've been so excited about it! I went to Goodwill to try and get some stuff for cheap that i thought would sell, but there were several hundred copies starting at 2-. not worth it. i figure i'll just sell our stuff.

every week when we have our financial meeting, i get re-inspired. maybe we need to do it twice weekly. we have committed to paying off 1/2 of our credit card debt in one year. that is a lot of money, mamas. I am too embarrassed to say, but if we can do it, it will be huge. baby steps...

[leomom]

Hi! I'm new, but hope to join your awesome group. I've just spent the last hour catching up on all the posts, and I have really been inspired! :love

DH and I are expecting our first ds or dd in 3 WEEKS!!!! :jumpers: I am so excited I can hardly stand it.

BUT, I am also really nervous about the unknown. I am completely unprepared for what this will mean financially for us. I am going to be a SAHM, so our income will change. And it seems like the list of things we need for baby continues to grow...I worry that it will grow, grow, and grow forever! (It doesn't help that I am well into my nesting phase. :drool)

We have been trying to live on one income for the last 3 months and have been doing OK. But, I agree with some of you when you say that when the money is there, it's hard to resist spending it. So, I opened up an ING direct savings acct. and put almost 3000 in it...and we're direct depositing 35 dollars every 2 weeks in it. Not anywhere near the recommended 10%, but I have to start with baby steps. It helps having this account as opposed to my regular savings that is linked to my checking acct. It was too easy to transfer money out and into checking. With the ING account, I can still access the money but it takes about 3 days, so I have to really need/want it to go to the trouble. So far, it's worked for me.

Here's my current challenge: I am trying to spend no more than 120 dollars a week for ALL expenses (excluding bills). I have been trying this for the last 3 months and have gone over every single week! It's been ok since I was still getting paid and we had the money...but in 3 weeks, we won't!! So I have to figure out a way to adhere to this budget or I'm going to start running up debt. This week, I decided to try something new. In the past, I've been logging everything I spend and adding it up...and it always passes right by that 125 mark...This week, I put 125 at the top and am subtracting my purchases like a checkbook register so I know exactly how much I have left in the budget. Sounds so simple, why did it take me so long to think of it??? We'll see if it works.

My mom is staying with me during the week since I'm a big baby and don't want to be alone this close to delivery! :innocent But....she spends money like crazy..and it's rubbing off on me. Even though she has no job, no savings, really no money, she spends, spends, spends. Not a great role model. When she was here on Friday, she offered to take me out to breakfast...I didn't really want to b/c although eating out used to be my biggest expense, I have pretty much cut it out b/c I never have anything to show for it. BUT, she mentioned it about 5 times, so I eventually gave in. Anyway, when the bill came, I felt bad letting her pay since she has no job...so I offered and she let me. It was 21.65 for the two of us to eat BREAKFAST!!! And I didn't even really want it. And I am still (3 days later) really mad at myself for letting it happen...and a little mad at my mom, even though I know that's not fair and I am responsible for my own actions...But what a waste!

So, I'm nervous about being strong this week and really sticking to my budget..I have about 80 dollars left until Friday when I start over, and I still have to buy groceries (which that 20 dollars could have paid half of them! :irked: ) and gas..any pointers or inspiration on sticking with it and staying strong when my mom suggests shopping and eating out this week???

Sorry guys that I've rambled so long but you have really inspired me to be strong and I just had to get these fears out to some people who can understand and relate..Thanks for listening!

[Faith]

I have been following this thread a bit, but haven't posted yet.

We were loosely doing Your $ or Your Life, and have skimmed Un-jobbing. We just now became completely debt free and now have a pretty big (to us at least!) chunk left over at the end of the month.

We have a big decision to make now- to take the money and get out of this rental on the main drag thru town, and buy a nice house with a bit of acerage in the country, etc, OR to do the investment thing and have DH retire really early. Both would be awesome.

I admit I am a little confused on the last few steps in YMOYL. Does anyone know how much money would we have to have invested to make about $2000 income a month? I have pregnant brain and don't have it all figured out yet.

I really want my DC to have some acerage to run around on, so we are seeing if we can't do a happy medium somehow. With the baby coming any day, we won't be moving for a few months anyway, so I have time to think about it.

[leomom]

Can anyone tell me exactly how to figure tax deductions for charitable contributions, like clothes, etc.? I've been donating for years and I always keep the receipts but then I never know how to use them to deduct. I think there is a book with a scale or something?

I noticed one of you menioned this type of deduction, so I thought I'd ask.

[newmainer]

Welcome leomom and faith... how exciting to have two preggy mamas on the thread!

As far as charitable deductions, my understanding is that it needs to add up to a certain amount for it to count because then you will do your deductions as itemized, rather than taking the standard deduc. you cant take both. So, add up all of your deductions and see if they will beat the standard. If they do- great, but if now, just take the regular. You'll get the child credit too this year, so don't forget that. Anyone else who knows more about this or differently, feel free to chime in .

As far as the last few steps in YMOYL Faith (congratulations by the way- that is really, really inspiring to me as we are right in the beginning of this) I think it might come down to what you value more. Personally, I would take the land and acreage any day. You can always find ways to scape up more money or save later to offset maybe. Personally, I'd rather retire a little later on a bit more land, than early and be renting or not someplace i want to be spending my now free time. anyone else?

Dh and I are talking about ways to get a rental income w/o buying another piece of property. Our house does not have a garage, so we are thinking about looking into the cost of a modular garage with an apartment up top. We could rent out the apt. in the summer for probably $800 a week! that would be sooooo amazing. Then in the winter months probably only $600 a month, but that's 1/2 our mortgage; the summer income would more than pay our property taxes for the year plus a great cushion. Its motivating to continue paying off our debt so we can think about tapping onto equity on the house to do that. Though it would mean borrowing against hte house, I think in the long term, its a wise investment.

Did my weekly shopping today. *still* going over 100! It was only $2 today, so I felt better. Maybe if I decrease by $2 each week, i'll finally make it...lol.

[SpiralChrissy]

Can I join you?
DH is losing his job in 2 weeks! :bawl
We have debt and a big mortgage and I don't know how we're going to make it.
I can certainly use GOOD!

[Peppermint]

Chrissy-

We have been through a number of lay-offs during our marriage-:hug

First- make sure he signs up for unemployment right away- it takes a while for the checks to start coming.

Next- right now cancel your cable, long distance, cell phones, anything else you can to lower those monthly bills- you will live without these things.

Then- figure out if there is any way you can make money from home- selling anything on ebay? An at-home business? Or- is there any part or full time work that you can do while dh is laid off? (I did substitute teaching, which works well, b/c there is no committment you start and end when it's good for you and you only work days that are good for you)

health insurance- will you still be covered for a while, will you need to pay into COBRA? Health insurance was always one of our biggest obstacles.

Sorry this is happening to you, but rest assured lots of people have been through it and we all came out ok ;) .

[MamaMonica]

Chrissy, good luck to you :hug

Faith- YMOL is about finding what is worth it to you, so everyone's answer will be different. Good luck with your decision! There are some online calculators- if you check out simpleliving.net, they'll have links.

We know someone who retired early five years ago at about 35 and now has returned to work to get health insurance- the costs were over $1500 a month (family of 5) just for that and this was the deal breaker on early retirement.

I hope there is some form of health insurance reform soon.

newmainer- great about the grocery shopping! :thumb I haven't been able to stay in my grocery budget yet. I keep trying.

[Faith]

Thanks for the replies!

We are not even trying to stay in our budget this month. :innocent With the extra birth expenses, my car breaking down, and just plain out needing to get some things now that we aren't poor anymore (like our own washer and dryer!), we decided to jump off the budget for a month. But in October it is back to bussiness.

That is awful about the health insurance! That is the one thing that has been bothering me. I have a list of what each expense 'should' be percentage-wise from your monthly budget, and the only thing we are over on by a big amount is insurance! We have health, car, rental and life. I don't know what else to do, when I have allready made sure we have the cheapest. We spend more on that category than anything but rent!

Well, I think we are leaning toward getting a fixer-upper house on some acerage in about six months (so I don't have to move with a tiny baby), and investing at a smaller ammount. That way, we can save money, be *happy* where we live, and still be working towards DH retiring early. None of us are too thrilled about our current residence here with no yard or anything, and I really don't want our DC growing up on this street.



Chrissy,
So sorry! It will be okay! I know this isn't the same, but when I was pregannt with our first, DH quit his job one day. It was a hell-hole and he just needed to do it. But, so there we were- no ins, no income, etc.
But since he had all that free time during the day, it didn't take him long to find a new job. I got on the state ins. for a few months to cover the pregnancy until his new insurance kicked in, and we ended up fine- well, better than fine because he had a better job!
You will get through it! :hug

[leomom]

Advice:

I have 80 dollars left in my budget for household expenses this week. I have made out my menu for next week and my grocery list for tomorrow. It shouldn't be more than 10 dollars, since I've been stocking up on meat when it's been on sale.

So...I will have about 70 to play with. Should I take advantage of the loss leaders for the week (even though they aren't needed in my weekly menu) so that I can take advantage of the sale prices, or should I just save the extra money for another week that may be more expensive?

I'm due in 2 1/2 weeks, so I've been slowly stocking up on sales (stocking the pantry and freezer), but now I'm wondering if I should keep doing that or start saving some extra money for little expenses that will pop up..I'm worried that I will not be able to be as frugal a shopper for the 1st few months after the baby comes due to time..so what's better to have..a stocked pantry at sale prices or extra cash?

BTW, we have no credit card debt, but we are working to bulid our savings which is pretty measley...

Chrissy...So sorry about your husband's job!

Newmainer- the rental property idea is fascinating to me. Wow! I hope it works out for you if that's what you decide to do.

[leomom]

:jumpers:

Went to the grocery store and the gas station today and came in $18.19 under budget for the week (my weekly budget starts over on Fridays due to payday scheduling)!!

This is the first time...EVER!! Thank you all for sharing your challenges and triumphs! You are the reason I was able to resist frivolous purchasing this week!! You've inspried me. :Thanks

[Peppermint]

:clap Way to go! :D

[SpiralChrissy]

Congrats to you Leomom! I hope I can say the same soon! :wink

Good luck with the final countdown to your delivery :)

[angel04345]

Wow its been a while since I have logged in! We moved! We are renting a house and its less then what we were paying for rent for a two bedroom apartment on the third floor! :irked: We will have to heat it but thats still not going to be as much as what we payed before just in rent and he was going up too!
I would say that we are still doing good with our budget! It helped that my bday coincided with the move because I get money for my bday and its useful to buy the things we needed!
I am so glad to see all the newcomers! I'm glad you are all doing this now before the debt gets to big to get out from under! I have a friend who recently had a baby. She wants to stay home now because the baby is CONSTANTLY crying. She thinks that something is wrong with her and is taking her to lots of differant docs to have her checked out. But she had to get a loan to pay her mortgage so she could stay home an extra month! She has deffered payments and she never realized how bad debt was until just now! So I feel like we are the lucky ones to have noticed it early enough on to get out of it!
Anyways I just wanted to check in with you all. Hope you are all doing GOOD!

[Peppermint]

Ladies here is the link for the Sept. thread- come join me, state your debt problem and goals and let's get to supporting each other- I need a boost!
http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=191794
Come subscribe!