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View Full Version : Do you have a birth plan?




happymamajenni
08-05-2004, 09:23 AM
Last time I was pregnant I made out a birth plan before I even met the doctor for the first time. I should never have given it to her, but I didn't know she was going to react the way she did. First she said she couldn't be legally bound to any document. I was confused...I wasn't asking her to sign anything, I just wanted her to get a feel for the kind of birth I wanted. Then she took a look at it and tore it apart. She said "Episiotomies are routine, so expect one", "All women end up getting epidurals, so expect to give in and want one", and I know there were a couple other things too. Plus she said "Just the fact that you made this list means that you are worried about the delivery, and if you worry, you won't progress in your labor and you'll end up with a c-section". Yeah, she was a real B****. That was the first and last time I went to her.
This time I'm not going to hand a birth plan to my doctor, but I am still going to make one to have my wishes fresh in my mind and so that my dh will know what I want so he can speak on my behalf while I'm in labour. Here is what I want so far:

-nurses must decide which arm is going to get the blood pressure cuff, and they aren't allowed to put an IV in or draw blood from that arm. (last time it took them 12 tries to get an IV in and they drew blood twice. I had so many holes in my arms and hands that when the blood pressure cuff went off (I had it on for two days straight) it felt like my hand and arm were going to explode and squirt blood out of all the of holes in me! :(

-I DO NOT WANT AN EPIDURAL

-Besides my dh, I don't know who I want in the room when I deliver. I guess it depends on who is at the hospital. (Last time I also had my mom, dad, brother and his girlfriend. But no matter what, I DON'T want my in-laws in the room.)

-When I push the baby out, I'll hold my legs, or I'll put them in stirrups, but I can't have anyone hold my legs. (I have varicose veins so my legs are really sensitive, and last time a vein became inflamed where someone held my leg while I was pushing. Luckily I didn't have a clot, but I could hardly walk for three weeks after giving birth.)

-I want to avoid an episiotomy if possible, and I want to be coached when to slow down in my pushing to prevent tearing.

-If the baby is healthy at birth I want to hold him/her immediately.

-When I breastfeed for the first time I want to try alone at first. I feel that breastfeeding is personal and intimate, and I want the first time I try it with the new baby to be special. (Last time I had my mother, mother-in-law, the lactation person and a nurse standing around my bed while they shoved my nipple into my dd's mouth trying to get her to latch on. I may as well been having sex for the first time while an audience watched and took turns giving advice, and put their hands on our private parts......do you know what I mean?)

Well, that's all I can think of for now.......

what are some of your wishes for your birth experience?




kater07
08-05-2004, 10:10 AM
I haven't started mine yet, but intend to get a rough draft done this weekend. I will post it here when I am ready.

Orange
08-05-2004, 10:42 AM
Wow Jenni, I think you should be glad you gave that doc a copy of your birth plan right away. At least you didn't have to waste anymore time with her. I told my first doc with my first babe that I planned on a natural childbirth and she chuckled and said, "oh you'll want an epidural." That was the last time I saw her.

I didn't have a birth plan b/c the philosophies at the birth center were in tune with what I wanted. They also have you fill out a form that is sort of a birth plan. The only thing I will be more explicit about this time is I don't want any internal checks. If they must, they can check me when I get there but that's it. They only did two, but those internal checks were pure torture for me!

ella-makes-3
08-05-2004, 12:28 PM
Glad you gave that doc your birth plan! Imagine if you had ended up with her when you were in labour? Hmm!
With dd I intialyy have a doc, and on my second appt I asked her about epidurals, that I didn't want one etc. She replied " well do you enjoy pain? " Also had the same philosophy about episiotomies and wouldn't tell me her ceserean rate either. Needless to say I ran away from her as fast as I could to a midwife!

This time I am having our baby in the same birthing centre that I had dd in that is attatched to a great hospital especially for women and babies.

I want the baby to be put on my chest the minute he/she comes out, no wiping , cleaning off.
DD had to be taken to the NICU so I got to see her very briefly.

I don't want the cord to be cut straight away, I want it to finish pulsing before it is cut, and hopefully Dh can cut it this time :love

I just want a natural birth with a relaxing nurturing atmosphere, and I also want dd in the room too.

mehndi mama
08-05-2004, 03:15 PM
Jenni - I wouldn't call giving your birth plan to your doctor a mistake - i'd call that the smartest thing you could have possibly done!

I don't make birth plans anymore - if I'm going to transfer to the hospital, it'll be an emergency, and I'm well-known in both local hospitals. Plus, I have that *aura* now - nobody even bothers to mess with me anymore ;) I can get pretty bossy in labor, if it looks like things aren't going my way.

Christi
08-07-2004, 06:29 PM
I had a birth plan with my ds but I didn't have to get it out. The nurses and my Doc were wonderful. I had such a great experience. I didn't get any kind of pressure to do anything. I don't think I will have to even write one out this time.

Boobs
08-25-2004, 05:25 PM
I should start working on mine. It's all in my head. I just had another idea, too. Maybe I should make a posterboard with the most important things and have it nearby to be SURE everybody attending knows what I want.

So far I know this much:

I want to give birth in our bedroom with my midwife, her asst. and my dh helping me.
I want dd there if she is comfortable. (she can go next door to the inlaws at any time)
No drugs.
No episiotimy!
I want the phone turned off and a sign on the front door that says in a nice way GO AWAY, WE'LL CALL YOU!
I don't want the cord cut immediately.
I do want to breastfeed immediately.
I want to take an herbal bath with the baby asap.
Nobody touches his penis if it's a boy.

wtchyhlr
08-25-2004, 05:43 PM
Plan... I need a plan? Well... crap. I don't have one yet. Midwife is just awesome, so I cn't imagine any problems, and if I transfer, it'll be emergency...

happymamajenni
08-26-2004, 08:32 AM
Peacefulvegan,

Did I read, "in-laws next door"? If my mother in-law lived next door to me I would have killed her or myself by now! If you get along well with them you are a lucky, lucky girl! My in-laws don't know I can't stand them, but one of these days I just know something will push me over the edge and I will have to tell them off, and I think it'll take me hours to finish!

Boobs
08-26-2004, 06:18 PM
Jenni,
Boy could we talk!! I'm the exact same way. My mil has no idea how much I dislike her! I've tried so hard to learn to love her and I just can't! I tolerate her the best I can. Fil is newer to the family than I am and super laid back, so I have no problems with him. She's like nails on a chalkboard though. It's amazing how much you can bottle up!! I'm really afraid I will explode one day if we have to live this close much longer.